s1 first kiss where they’re both kinda nervous and unsure and dean asks “can i kiss you, sammy?” all quiet and rough and right before it happens.
s2 first kiss where sam’s sloppy drunk and begging “promise me, promise me dean” and all dean can do it grip his face and kiss through both their tears and say “i can’t, i can’t.”
s3 first kiss that’s angry and possessive and flavored with “why, dean, why. how could you do this to me.”
s4 first kiss because there’s too many words they can’t say, too many secrets and this is the only way to tell the truth, all lips and no words.
s5 first kiss that’s full-on end-of-the-world urgent and defiant, with “sammy, we shouldn’t,” and “it’s wrong,” and “fuck it I don’t care,” because why even fight it anymore?
s6 first kiss and there’s something missing behind sam’s eyes, his smile’s just a bit too smug, but dean’s wanted this since forever, so he ignores that and takes and takes and takes.
s7 first kiss because they’re hand in hand and sam’s hissing through the pain but he’s still seeing things that aren’t there and all dean can think to do is this, kiss him like it’s some fairy tale, and suddenly all sam sees is dean.
s8 first kiss desperate and hard and “i’m begging you,” because grand speeches aren’t enough, because the “i love you” can’t just be implied, not this time.
s9 first kiss with pleas and apologies and “sam, sam i just couldn’t lose you again, i’m sorry,” and gentle but firm hands pushing them apart and “no dean. i can’t.”
s10 first kiss that tastes like blood and tears and “i’m proud of us” still hangs in the air but dean’s not kissing back and it’s too late and it’s “no, please, please wake up.”
s11 first kiss that’s a thousand apologies, a thousand promises, a thousand prayers, that’s “i’m sorry I shouldn’t have,” and “don’t be, c'mere, c'mere dean.”
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