Friend U Can Keep...
Ledger Ward x F!reader (FWB w/ hidden feelings)
Synopsis: Neither of you guessed the outcome of your date would involve the truth being laid out on the table after several years…
Warnings/tags *MDNI*: roman mentioned, soft!dom Ledger, brief alcohol mention, bar environment, hidden feelings, yearning + pining (mutual but Ledger is down BAD), slight toxicity undertones, dry humping, smut, raw, unprotected piv, creampie, slight angst if you squint, oral (f!receiving), fingering, missionary, dirty talk, love confession, slight fluff, overstimulation, proofread once!
WC: 4.8k
A/N: Of coursee the title is a nod to Victoria Monet’s song "F.U.C.K" lol. It was interesting to write about a different dynamic and character this time, hope I’ve done it justice!
I hope you enjoy and thank you for reading, feedback is always appreciated! <3
One night. It only took one, slightly drunken night out of a four year friendship for the lines to blur into uncharted territory. Then it turned into a few more until you two had slipped into a comfortable routine. You’d call and he’d show up. Neither of you addressed the fact that it was past the point of just being sex with no feelings involved. It was never just sex.
Trailing back into his bedroom after a warm shower, you made your way over to his closet. After the first few times it happened, Ledger suggested keeping some clothes at his place. Though it was proving to be convenient, you never objected to leaving in his clothes beforehand. In hindsight, the opportunity to casually lounge in his scent when he wasn’t around filled you with comfort.
Sitting up against the headboard, Ledger watched you get dressed from the bed. His gaze casually roamed down your body before he spoke. “You free this Saturday?”
Turning to face him now, you slipped your shirt on, responding, “depends, what time?”
“After my night shift. We can get breakfast in the morning”. Shortly after your arrangement began, Ledger started coming up with ways to get you to stay. Going out for breakfast or lunch easily became a part of the routine as well.
Making your way over to him, you hummed in thought before saying, “I’m tempted”. Once you kneeled right next to him on the bed, he absentmindedly reached for your thigh. You soothingly trail your hand up and down his forearm, adding, “I have a date right before you get off though, so I’ll let you know, ok?”
Unsure he heard correctly, a brief look of confusion flashed across his features. Repeating your words, he slowly questioned, “A date…?”
“A double date actually. I must have forgotten to mention it to you”. As you spoke Ledgers gaze was focused on your face, trying to decipher if you were joking or not. Unable to spot any jest, he tried to ignore the unsettling feeling stirring in his chest.
Calmly speaking, “with who…?”, he gave your thigh a light squeeze. The thought of you being with anyone else, let alone on a date with a stranger, made him weary.
“One of my friends. She’s been seeing this guy for a few weeks now and she thought it’d fun to set me up with one of his friends. I don’t know which one”.
Blinking for a moment, the realization set in that there was a possibility you could end up liking him enough to give him another chance. Maybe loving him if things go well... “And you agreed?”
“Yeah, I mean I figure why not? I’ve never been on a blind date, I think it’ll be fun”. Slightly confused with the sudden shift in energy, you couldn’t make sense of the unreadable emotion in his stare.
He cleared his throat, breaking eye contact for a second before returning his gaze. “You’re being serious right now…?”
Affirming, “Yes, I’m being serious…”, you paused, taking in his expression. You were almost certain there was a hint of hurt behind his gaze before it quickly disappeared. Giving his arm a reassuring squeeze, you softened your tone. “What? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing…”.
Urging him to speak, “Ledger…”, you tilted your head. After spending enough time together, you knew his cues.
“I didn’t know you were dating, that’s all”.
“I’m not ‘dating’ anyone right now, I’m just going on one date”.
“And you’d be cool with me going on dates…?”
Taking another pause, the thought caused a twinge of discomfort, but you brushed it off. “You’re single aren’t you…? Why would I have a problem with that…?”
He stared blankly for a moment, just analyzing your response until cracking a small knowing grin. “You didn’t answer the question”.
Reluctantly, you answered, “yes, I’d be perfectly fine with you going on dates”, disregarding the pit churning in your stomach from the mere notion of him being with anyone else but you.
“Ok then. Good to know”.
That following Friday, Ledger barely spoke to you. It was completely lost on you why this was suddenly an issue. Both of you agreed in the beginning that nothing would change with your friendship. Things would remain the same. Up until this point, you were under the impression there were no feelings involved. At least on his part.
Ledger was keeping busy to stay distracted. To stop the spiraling in his mind after that conversation but it didn’t help. Nothing helped. Somewhere along the way, things shifted for him. Well before sex was in the equation actually. He was lying to you now, guilt eating away at him the more he led you to believe everything was just casual. Any platonic feeling had long vanished, gradually turning into something he thought would wear off. The risk of losing you now if he was honest far outweighed the truth.
Saturday night
Roman’s voice cut through the atmosphere as he caught Ledgers attention. Once he looked over at him, Roman nodded in the direction of the door.
Finishing up a refill, he passed it off to the customer before quickly glancing up. It was you. Heart skipping a beat, you spared him a brief look, swiftly breaking eye contact while making your way through the bar. Ledger clenched his jaw, zoning in on your date. You had urged them to go to another bar but to no avail, this was their “favorite” one.
He watched as you trailed over to the pool table, conversing with your friend along the way. Feeling his stare, your heart raced with each passing step. Unable to ignore the feeling gnawing inside, you halfway listened to her ranting about the poor service at the restaurant you came from, humming in agreement. Once you reached the pool table, you excused yourself while your dates set it up for a game.
Brushing through the crowd of people to reach the bar, you stopped right in front of him. Gaze momentarily wandering down your figure, taking in your appearance, he neutrally asked, “What can I get for you?”
“Lemon drop please”. You stood there, absentmindedly tapping on the bar as you waited. An uncomfortable silence settling, you peered around the bar.
“How’s your date?”
Bringing your attention back to his face, you truthfully answered, “it’s… ok”. And it was ok. Just ok. Though there were no apparent issues, something was missing. He wasn’t Ledger.
Ears perking up at the sound of that, he prodded, “really? That’s it?” Lips curling into a slight smirk, a small wave of relief washed over him when he heard your tone.
“Yeah. He’s ok, more than ok actually but…”, you shrugged, glancing down when the thought crossed your mind. You swallowed before truthfully speaking, “…Just not for me I guess”.
Sliding the drink towards you, he spoke, “on the house”, giving you a warm smile. Softening his tone, he leaned in to add, “Let me know if you need to talk later, ok?”
Taking a small sip, you nodded. “I will. Thank yo-”
“You alright?”
Ledger glanced over at the unfamiliar voice that cut you off, shifting his gaze down to see he had circled an arm around your waist. Blinking at the gesture, his jaw tightened.
Drawing your attention to your date, you affirmed, “just grabbing a drink, let’s go”, offering a short smile before leading him away, avoiding an awkward interaction at all costs. You swiftly turned to head back to the pool table, catching a glimpse of Ledgers stoic expression at his nod of acknowledgment.
Upon hearing the sound of Roman snickering, Ledger spared him a glance, seeing a telling grin spread across his features. Shaking his head in response, he resumed tending to the bar, briefly looking in your direction as the night went on. Your eyes began to wander every time you felt his piercing stare settle on you. Around the third time you looked over, an unpleasant pit stirred in your stomach. The sight of him smiling and laughing with a group of women huddled at the bar bothered you more than you would’ve thought.
Maybe it was the drink giving you a new found boldness, but you decided to tease him a bit as a result. When your turn came around for pool, you kindly asked your date for help. “Am I holding it correctly?” In response he shuffled behind you, helping line the stick properly while he mumbled pointers. Fully tuned out to his voice and the commotion of the bar, you gradually bent into position, intentionally brushing against him.
Sparing another look, Ledger blinked at the scene unfolding in front of him, feeling a pang in his chest as you held eye contact. Completely focused on you now, a playful smile ghosted your lips before you shifted your attention. Taking a small moment to analyze the position of the cue balls, you took your shot. Once you were done you stood back up, watching as each one smoothly fell into place. You ended your turn with a modest smile. Without thinking, Ledger immediately started moving towards you.
“Damn are you sure you don’t play pool?”
As your friend exclaimed, “girl what the fuck was that?! You never told me you played like this!”, you heard your date whistle in the background.
Amused, you laughed at her statement, fondly remembering when Ledger taught you. Letting out a small laugh, you responded, “I don’t, I swear!” While it wasn’t a lie, it wasn’t completely true. You don’t actively play pool, but you’ve refined the skill. The night he brought you to the bar after hours, you two stayed, simply practicing until you were satisfied with your progress. He refused to leave before you mastered your “party trick”, as you called it.
Finishing your drink now, you resumed conversation with them. You were momentarily distracted, laughing along with your friend at a joke that was cracked until a distinct voice rung out against your ear. “I need to speak with you”. Glancing up in his direction, the look in his eyes sent a faint flutter through your stomach. Briskly shifting your attention to the group, you excused yourself.
Mumbling, “I’ll be right back”, he had already snaked an arm around your waist, whisking you away towards the back. You initially thought he was stopping at the office, but he continued moving through the bar. Questioning, “where are we going?”, you received no response. When Roman briefly passed by, Ledger called his name.
“You good with closing tonight?” Peering between you two in amusement, Roman nodded in response. Confusion warped across your features as Ledger guided you out the back door. Once he reached his truck, he opened up the passenger side, instructing in a steady tone “get in”. You stood there, slightly in awe, just blankly staring as you took in his demeanor. He had never been so adamant with you before. When you didn’t move, he repeated himself. “I’m not playing, get in the truck”.
Broken out of your daze now, you began moving, stepping into the truck with his assistance. Crossing your legs, you fought the urge to smile, biting on your bottom lip as a thrill of adrenaline coursed through you. Occasionally peering over at him during the drive, your eyes wandered down his body, focusing on his arms. You clenched your thighs in anticipation, remaining quiet for the rest of the ride as your mind drifted.
Feeling your gaze on him, Ledger glanced over, resolve dropping a bit when he saw your expression. Reaching out for your hand, he brought it towards his lips, placing a lingering kiss before interlocking them in your lap. Heart swelling at the gesture, you soothingly trailed your free hand up and down his forearm. Though neither of you had spoken yet, the energy was evident.
Once he pulled into his driveway he walked over to your side, opening up the door to help you step down. Circling an arm around your waist again, he kept you close as you walked, momentarily separating to unlock the door. Having been to his place several times at this point, it was lost you why this visit felt so different as soon as you crossed the threshold.
You shuffled your heels off before walking further, stopping to stand next to his coffee table. After locking the door Ledger paused, leaning against it for a moment as he watched you, contemplating on what to say. Each of you stared at one another in compulsion, just waiting for the silence to break.
After several beats, you whispered, “you said you needed to speak to me…”
Ledger let another thread of silence pass before speaking. “Are you happy…?”
Heart rate speeding up at the sound of that, your brows furrowed as his question registered. Upon seeing your puzzled expression, he rephrased himself. “Do I make you happy?” He spoke in a steady tone but there was a hint of doubt in his eyes while he waited for your response.
“Of course I am…”. Your heart twisted at the thought of him questioning that to any degree. Adding with a quiet voice, “You always do… you know that”.
Taking a few cautious steps toward you, he pleaded, “Then tell me what you need…”. Gradually closing the distance with each word, he continued, “Tell me and I’ll be that for you, I promise”.
Feeling a small lump form in your throat from his words, you took a step back, looking down as you placed your hand on the arm of the couch for stability. “Ledger…”
Just inches away from you now, he cupped your cheek. “Give me a chance to show you how serious I am about you”. Gently tracing his thumb along your skin, he lowered his voice. “Please…”. You brought your hand up to grasp his forearm, leaning into his touch. “Let me be the only one baby… you know I’ll take care of you.” Faintly swiping his thumb across your bottom lip, his gaze dropped, lingering on your mouth for a moment. He softened his tone, adding, “always will”. Ledger stood there, the sound of his heart beat pounding against his ear drum gradually rising as he waited for you to say something. Anything.
Hesitant to immediately believe him, you scanned his face, searching for any hint of insincerity. When you saw nothing but honesty, you placed your free hand on his abdomen, trailing up towards his chest. You paused, feeling the soft thrum under your fingertips, taking note as his heart beat quickened. Shifting your focus to his lips now, you quietly urged, “come here”.
Circling an arm around your waist, he listened, dipping his head down to meet your lips. Stumbling flush against him now, you squeezed his forearm, letting out a small moan at the motion. Still unsatisfied with the level of closeness, Ledger brought his hands down, gripping the back of your thighs to pick you up with ease. It was habitual now. Even reaching a point where you no longer jumped or detached from him, he’d simply wrap you around his body.
Naturally latching onto him, you gingerly drew your nails across his shoulders, coaxing out a muffled groan. You were blissfully unaware he was walking towards the couch until feeling the fabric of his jeans brushing against your thighs. Dress riding up dangerously close to your hips, Ledger ran his hands along the exposed flesh of your thighs. Reluctantly detaching for air, your breath hitched as you took in the sight of him, a sense of familiarity washing over you. Lips parted, he stared, fully unaware his eyes conveyed the same sentiment. Clearly now.
Thursday wasn’t the first time you had seen it. Ledger would avert his gaze before you took notice, but you caught glimpses. The brief occurrences seemed to increase after you started sleeping together however you never questioned it. Not until recently.
Tenderly trailing a hand down to his bicep, you quietly asked, “how long?”, analyzing his features in the process. Giving a reassuring squeeze, you repeated yourself, “how long have you felt like this?” Ledger shifted his gaze, hesitating as the first moment flashed through his mind. Upon seeing his apprehension, your grasp on his shoulder drifted towards his neck to gently cup his jaw. “Tell me the truth”.
Unable to look away now, Ledger was quiet for another second before speaking. “You remember the night I taught you how to play pool…?” Words registering in your mind, you tentatively nodded. Your heart rate sped up once it dawned on you that happened two years ago. “And how it ended…?” You nodded again, a faint smile gracing your lips.
“After I fell asleep on your couch, you put me in your bed at some point, but I ended up waking up in the middle of the night”. A small laugh bubbling out as the memory came up, you exclaimed, “You looked so uncomfortable, I had to beg you to sleep in the same bed because you wanted to give me space!”
Cracking a grin as he listened, Ledger shook his head, letting out a slight chuckle when you finished. Once his laughter dissipated, the feeling settled deep in his chest. “I didn’t want you to leave that morning…”. Occasionally rubbing small circles into your skin while he palmed your thighs, he gave you a gentle squeeze, voice almost above a whisper, “I still don’t”.
Heart skipping a beat at his admission, you traced along his jaw, brushing your thumb across his bottom lip. Ledger tightened his grip, the pressure building in his jeans steadily becoming uncomfortable. The expression on his face sent a ripple through your stomach. You laid a peck on his cheek, repeating the action before placing a lingering one on his lips.
Disconnecting, you teasingly dragged your hand down his arm. Gazing between your eyes, his view dropped down to your mouth before he eagerly leaned back in. Palming your ass now, he groaned, shifting your hips closer. You ground against him, hands drifting toward his chest to push him back into the cushion. A sharp wave of arousal spread through your body as you deepened the kiss.
Feeling the ache settle deep in your core, you tugged at the hem of his shirt, dipping underneath to feel his skin. Reading your cues, Ledger partially disconnected to lift it over his head. One of his arms rounded your waist, pulling you flush against him. You wrapped your arms around his neck, smiling into the kiss as you soothingly ran your nails along his upper back. He nipped at your bottom lip, smoothing over the spot with his tongue, sending another spiral of pleasure through you.
Focus shifting to your jaw, he planted lingering kisses as he made his way down your neck. Moving at an agonizing pace, he took his time licking and sucking along your skin. Eyes drifting shut when he reached the sensitive spot just below your ear, a breathy moan fell from your lips. Ache growing unbearable now, you clenched around nothing, letting out a shaky breath. You were on the verge of pleading before he stood up, firmly keeping your legs wrapped around him now.
Placing several kisses along his cheeks while he beelined for the bedroom, a small smile ghosted your lips when you felt his forming. You teasingly nipped at his jaw before whispering against the shell of his ear. “I missed you by the way”.
Feeling a hint of satisfaction swell in his chest, Ledger grinned. “I know”.
Once he reached the foot of the bed, he set you down before sitting at the edge. Making space, he snaked an arm around your waist, pulling you in close. Your hands resting on his biceps traced along his skin. He peered up through hooded eyes, quietly adding, “I can promise, I missed you more though…”. Thighs clenching in response, you took a small step back, gradually sliding your dress straps off while he watched. Maintaining eye contact as you closed the distance, Ledger ran his fingers along the spine of your zipper. With a gentle tug, the dress slid off your figure, pooling around your feet.
Now left in just your underwear, you moved to settle back onto his lap, roaming your hands up his chest to pull him in for a kiss. Returning with the same fervor, he groaned, palming your thighs to shift you closer. Hands wandering down to undo his belt and drag his zipper down, you parted from him as the kiss grew heated. Dipping in to teasingly stroke him through the thin fabric of his boxers, he twitched under your palm. You faintly ran your thumb along the head of his dick, mumbling against his lips, “why don’t you show me how much hm…?” Whispering the last part directly into his ear, “I won’t believe it until you do”.
Patience snapping, Ledger stood, dropping you onto the bed as he removed his pants. Body thrumming with anticipation, you crawled up the bed, watching him intently. When his length came into view, you bit your bottom lip upon seeing a bead of precum forming. Even though you were well acquainted with his size, he still managed to awe you. He hovered above you now, grabbing your ankles to pull you toward the middle of the bed. Unhurriedly dragging your underwear off, he began pressing pecks along your legs, traveling down to your inner thighs. Inching his way closer, he sucked and nipped at your skin, holding steady eye contact.
Deciding it was enough teasing when the need in your eyes sparked something primal in him, he parted your thighs wide, slotting himself in between. All it took was one long glide of his tongue from your entrance to your clit before his control completely vanished. The flutter in your core when he dipped into your entrance made you involuntarily clench around his tongue. Breath shifting, you braced yourself, hands sprawling in the sheets as he repeated the action.
Keeping a firm grasp, Ledger planted your thighs flush against his face, swirling his tongue around your clit. Grabbing hold of his forearm, your breath came out in soft pants as his pace increased. With each pass coaxing more arousal, he’d bring you close to edge, stopping to savor your taste. Bringing two fingers to your entrance, he shifted his other hand to press down against your navel. Parting just enough so that you could hear him clearly, he urged, “you know I need more”.
You weren’t able to fully register his statement until he slid his fingers in, resuming the relentless pace. Back arching, your hand flew to his head tracing along his scalp. Vision blurring as he curled them inside, a broken moan spilled out. “Fuck, r- right there”. He knew your body well. Too well at this point. Maintaining the calculated rhythm he set with his mouth, he slowed the movement of his hand, intensifying the pressure building deep in your core.
Fluttering around him, your head fell back onto the mattress. A few more strokes was all it took for your orgasm to spread throughout your body. Breath faltering, your hands clutched the sheets as he continued his actions. When your thighs started trembling, he replaced his fingers with his tongue. He barely gave you a moment to ride the wave, greedily coaxing more fluid out of you, groaning at the taste. Body writhing underneath him now, he held your thighs, firmly keeping them in place.
Eyes drifting shut, your hand flew down to his head again, unsure of whether you wanted to push him away or hold on. The pleasure coursing through your veins becoming too much, you meekly pleaded, “w-wait, I’m—”, before another sharp wave of arousal hit. Grasping at his arm again to get his attention, you attempted to push at his head.
Finally letting up, Ledger lifted his head, rubbing reassuring circles along your thighs. “You, ok?” You were quiet for a moment, lips parted while taking in his appearance. Eyes lingering on the arousal glistening off his lips and beard, the daze in his eyes sent a fresh twinge of desire straight to your core. You caressed his cheek, giving a small nod of confirmation.
Pressing kisses along your thighs again, Ledger made his way up your body, stopping at your breasts. His hands followed, gradually moving towards your hips. Grazing his teeth across your nipple, he soothed the sensation with his tongue. Letting out a small moan, you loosely wrapped your legs around his waist. He gave your other breast the same attention, dick twitching against your thigh as he did.
Gently running your hands across the side of his abdomen, you paused, tilting your head to allow him more access to your neck. The heat simmering in your stomach intensified with every pass of his lips. Pulling him in for a kiss as soon as he reached your jaw, you pressed his hips flush against you. He groaned, gliding along your wet pussy before lining himself up. Pushing forward, he slid in inch by inch. Whimpering at the sensitivity, your hand wandered over, feeling his muscles tense under your palm.
Rubbing the flesh on your thigh before giving them a squeeze, he murmured against your lips, “f-fuck, you feel that baby?” Ledger started delivering slow, deep thrusts, emphasizing each one as he sunk back in. Blinking up at him in a daze, you released a lengthy exhale, nodding in response. Bringing his hand up to cup your jaw, he tilted your head to the side, gently tracing his thumb along your jaw. Speaking directly into your ear, “you believe me now, don’t you?”
You moaned, clenching around his length. Through a hushed tone, you mumbled, “I believe yo—”, cut off by a sharp moan. A swift roll of his hips caused him to brush along the spongy part inside you. As your mind went blank, your eyes drifted shut, focusing on the acute tingle forming in your core. Ledger twitched, both of you growing quiet while the obscene wet sound emitting from each plunge of his dick filled the room. Clawing down his shoulder, your mouth parted as he gradually increased his speed.
Voice breaking into a rasp, he uttered, “That’s it? You want me right there baby?”
You pleaded, “f-fuck, don’t stop”. The rasp in his tone sparking another swirl of arousal, you whimpered, locking your legs around him, keeping him as close as possible. “Keep talking, p-please”.
“Is that why you were quiet earlier? You were focused on my voice?” Unable to form any coherent sentences, every word he spoke drew you closer to the edge. “I effect you that much hm? You could cum just from this?” Heat flaring in his abdomen, he throbbed as your tremors became frequent. Rolling his hips again to graze the spot, you released a harsh moan. “Meant everything I said… I—”, he paused before the words could slip out, pressing kisses along your neck instead. The last thing he wanted to do was scare you.
You praised, “you feel s’good, so-”, moaning as the sound of his skin slapping against yours rung out.
Shifting his head back into frame, he urged, “look at me”. In a fawn-like state now, once his features came into view, your body had a visceral reaction. Hand traveling up the nape of his neck, you brought him down to connect your lips.
Parting after a short moment, you mumbled out, “I love you”, against his lips without thinking. Your breath hitched when the realization came. Dropping your gaze, you involuntarily fluttered around his length when the feeling swelled in your chest.
As soon as Ledger registered what you said he tipped your chin back up, “say it again”. He drifted his hands down, slightly elevating your hips to meet his strokes.
The new angle causing his dick to repeatedly curve along your sensitive walls, you dug your nails into his skin, wailing, “oh f-fuck!”
Leaning beside your ear again, he released a throaty groan. Voice completely hoarse now, he instructed, “Say that shit again, tell me how you feel”.
Eyes beginning to roll back, the words tumbled out of you, “I love you, love being with yo-”. Choking on your sentence, tears threatened to spill when the intensity of your orgasm caught you off guard. Thighs trembling, you contracted around his length hard, feeling him sink back in once more before he twitched. Drawing out a deep groan from Ledger, his muscles tensed as ropes of cum coated your walls. You pulsed, clinging onto him while the waves of warmth pooled at your core, seeping onto his skin.
Ledger softened his grip, waiting for your breath to even out before pressing a kiss under your ear, voicing “I love you too”.
Masterlist :)
need more ledger fics 😭
