a tru bby

Laziness is – I need to do this thing. I don’t want to do this thing, therefore I won’t do this thing. I couldn’t care less about the consequences, or who it hurts, as long as I get to enjoy myself. Complete lack of care for others. Instant gratification achieved.

Responsible Self Care/Mindfulness is – I need to do this thing. I want/don’t want to do this thing. However I’ve been working really hard lately. I’m feeling burnt out and exhausted. I need a break or I’m going to get sensory overload, or have a meltdown. I’m going to skip this task in order to take care of my mental and physical health. I can always tackle this task tomorrow. The world won’t end if I prioritise my health.

Procrastination is – I need to do to this thing. I want/don’t want to do it, but it’s important I do. However, I don’t want to do it just yet because it’s a big task and it’s making me anxious, and I could probably do other stuff first, so I’ll put it to the back of the list and do it later on.

Executive Dysfunction (the core ADHD experience) is – I need to do this thing. I want/don’t want to do it, but despite needing to do this thing… I can’t. I don’t know why I can’t. It should be easy right? I just need to get up, and find the item, and start the task. But how do I start the task?? There’s so many steps involed. What’s the best way to do this? This is really stressing me out because I need to do this thing, and I’m so frustrated! Why is this not happening, it’s not even this hard. But no, I’m just scrolling through the internet still. Pleeeassse, I’m begging, just start the task.

Hyperfocus (the ADHD intense state of focus) is – Cool. I’m doing this thing. This thing is really engaging. I’m so focused on this thing. There is nothing else that exists but this task. Oh crap, it’s been five hours and I haven’t made lunch, and really need the bathroom, and I’m kinda exhausted. Where did my day go!? Oh my god. Woops.

Executive Dysfunction (the Time Blindness aspect) is – > Version 1) (Time moves too fast) I need to do this thing at 3:00, which means I need to leave at 2:30 to get there for 2:50 so I can be ten minutes early and… What do you mean it’s already 2:45!? *PANIC* > Version 2) (Time moves too slow) I need to do this thing at 3:00, which means I need to leave at 2:30 to get there for 2:50 so I can be ten minutes early. Wow! I sure did get all of this preperation done early so I can leave on time! I bet it’s almost 2:30 now. Wait… What do you mean it’s still 11am??????

title: Ch. 3 of Disconnect by azaleawrites

type: smut

background: Kuroo snuck in last night & stayed over. You guys had been talking about having sex, but you were nervous since neither of you had done it before~

***

“Umf…” I groan as my alarm clock rings. I open my eyes to see Kuro reaching with his long arms to swipe the alarm off my phone.

“You deserve to sleep in, we had a long night,” he says, brushing my hair to the side of my face. My head rests in the curve of his neck. I nuzzle into it a little more, feeling his heat of his neck on my cheek. I open my relaxed hand and run it across his chest.

“I don’t want you to leave,” I tell him, knowing he had practice this morning.

“Well…I missed practice already.” He laughs nervously, his tone more humorous than regretful. “I needed to have left a while ago. I texted Kenma to let coach know.”

“Won’t you get in trouble?”

“I’ll be fine, (Y/n)-chan. Coach trusts me. Besides, you’re so cute on my chest that I couldn’t bear to move you.”

“Okay.” I blush.

“How are you feeling?” He asks.

I groan again and lay my head flat on his chest. “Comfy, sleepy.” I pause and add, “Satisfied.“

He laughs and cranes his neck to kiss the top of my head.

“Good. And everything…you were okay with everything we did, right?”

“Definitely.” I run my fingers from the top of his chest to the top of his underwear, teasing the elastic. His body is wide, with his thighs thick, but his stomach is flat enough that his hip bones protrude, leaving a small enough gap to where I don’t need to exert much effort to get in his underwear. I rub my fingers under his underwear, barely skimming the head of his dick. I stop fidgeting with the elastic and retrieve my hand, as the top of my finger is slightly wet now. I draw my hand flat on his chest once more and slide my bare thigh onto his.

“Oho-ho, are you wanting more, (Y/n)-chan?” Kuroo says slowly, looking down at me. Touching my chin, he guides my head so I’m just a couple inches away from his face. His breath is still warm and slightly sweet. His lips look so soft… He stops, as though waiting for my response. I meet his eyes with an innocent look that alludes to temptation.

“Say no more.” He grabs my face with one hand and pulls me into a kiss. Starting slow, he gives me soft kisses, adjusting pressure so that he continuously kisses me harder. Then, keeping his forehead against mine, he leaves my lips. My impatience gets the better of me, and I push my hips up into his. He gives a low, near menacing chuckle and bites my bottom lip—hard. I whine in surprise and pain.

“I want to try something with you…” he whispers in my ear before nibbling it. He grabs my wrists and pins them above my head. He slides his right hand down the side of my body and lightly places his other hand on the space above my collarbone, his thumb pressed on my neck.

“Be a good girl—keep those hands up there for me…” He says.

“Uhm, y-yes.” I tighten my grasp on my hands.

“Good. Now, keep in mind—”

“Yes?”

“If you move them, you’ll be punished.”

“Pun…punished?”

He ignores me, moving to bite and suck my ear–

I’m not a pessimist, I’m a realist.