Teen Wolf prompts I'll never write.

Stiles: How do you know that?

Jackson: He keeps acting like a jerk towards me.

Stiles: Oh! Yes, he is a jerk sometimes.

Scott: You misheard what he said, didn't you?

Derek: Más duro.

Stiles: How do you say faster?

Derek: Más rápido.

Stiles: And how do you say deeper?

Derek (grunting): Okay, I get it! You want it rough.

Derek: Stiles, stop talking to my ass.

Stiles: What? Afraid your dick would get jealous?

Stiles: I'll get to him in a moment.

Danny: Yes... I've been out and proud for years.

Scott: Do you know what bottom shaming is?

Danny: It's when people judge bottoms as being less masculine or inferior.

Scott: I understand.

Stiles: We were talking about homework. I feel like you are having a completely different conversation on your own.

Scott: I was talking about homework, you were wondering what the most efficient way to cut an arm is.

Allison: It seems like we are.

Stiles: I'm right here.

Scott: Completely by ourselves.

Stiles: You can say that you want me to leave.

Allison: Oh! You can take a hint?

Erica (from another room): Can you have your epiphanies in the morning? Some people are trying to masturbate over here.

Isaac (from a different room): Don't you mean 'sleep'?

Scott: That doesn't sound right!

*earlier*

Derek: I'm afraid one day you'll do something so incredibly stupid you'll get us all killed.

DeAged!Derek (suggestively): And I did Stiles.

Scott: Derek, it isn't the time to make jokes. What did you do, Stiles?

Stiles: ...

DeAged!Derek: ...

Stiles: From my angle I can't see it bounce.

Derek: See what bounce?

Stiles: Do you know why I always stay behind when we go running.

Derek: Because you can't keep up.

Stiles: Yes, but also because I like to see it bounce.

Derek: I focus too much on the details.

Stiles: Who told me I couldn't be gay dressed like I usually do.

Stiles: Now I'm married to an alpha werewolf with abs for days.

Everyone: *clapping awkwardly*

Stiles: Where's Danny? Danny, remember how I kept asking you if I was attractive to gay guys.

Stiles: Well... Seems like I am attractive to guys with biceps bigger than my head.

Isaac (whispering to Derek): Is this how you imagined your wedding?

Stiles: No, it's MY turn.

Lydia: What's all this fuss about?

Scott: We're deciding whose turn is to bottom.

Stiles: And it's my turn!

Lydia: Oh, my god! Can't you guys switch?

Stiles: If you aren't going to take this seriously maybe don't get involved.