sign of peace

if I promise to be good, can you promise things will turn out as they should? streets so dark and lights so yellow against the blue sky, It's blue, the sky and the greenery on both sides this night on this night life will change for the better, they say on this night this night things won't stay the same things cannot remain through the night cold hands warmed in my jacket and my pants pocket and the flickering of the overhead sign advertising where we party tonight nothing's gonna be the same everything, oh everything's gonna change nothing can be the same everything must change if I promise and I do I really will! I'll be so good Can you guarantee can you even see it going alright for me?

Sat outside Watching the sky Streaked with colors Thats life Singing out To the clouds I echo back down That’s life Giving up That anyone hears Because nobody cares Thats life

Been too busy to work on myself Been too prideful to ask for help Desperately wishing it would all be done Endlessly seeking somewhere to run What does this accomplish Who does this help I’m still alone I’m still poor I’m still selfishly wanting more

Writing songs Wanting it all Moving on That’s life Being good Loving you Easy to do Thats life

Been too busy to get any better Convincing myself that time’s the matter When I’ve got it I’d do fuck all And wonder how everything’s fallen apart I want to accomplish I want you to hear this I can make music I can sing songs I am an artist Maybe I am wrong

Yeah the ceiling looks nice from this side of the floor It looks clean, so clean and white you could almost ignore All the waste of my time looking sky-high and never forward Let me change the lights, maybe green and bright, so it’s almost like I’m outdoors Mmm, outdoors With the bugs that crawl on me And the leaves that start tickling (waving) And the spiderwebs I can’t see but can feel all on me Mmm the outdoors The outdoors How could you take the whole outdoors with you? How could you? Take the whole outdoors with you

But it’s fine ‘cause these wall are so straight and so even every time And they’re sturdy and I’ve heard and they hold up real nice There’s nothing beyond them, I don’t think so There is nothing within them, I don’t think But the outdoors The outdoors Where it’s warm, and it’s dirty But it’s where I wanna be Out with you, out with me The outdoors The outdoors

Its getting harder to pretend That it’s easy to forget That I’d ever forgive Out of anything other than fear It’s getting harder to pretend That I know how this ends And I know what they’re doing The things that I do Nothing stops until it does And I’m learning what it was Pinpointing what I want But always in a past tense

I’m starting to disassociate Something puts me on pause I wish I could say what it was But the words just… It’s getting harder to turn it off I know who I’ll become Dammit I hate it so much It will consume me

I'm sorry I I'm keeping you awake I know you need a break I'm sorry that I'm so loud I'll try my best to keep it down I'm sorry that I'm still here I know I said I'd leave last year I'm sorry that I can't find someone that loves me like you Nobody loves me like you Nobody cares, it's true I'm sorry you do Know that I'm sorry I know you wanted to go You said this don't feel like home I don't know what I'm missing I just know I'll miss you Sorry that you love me I'm sorry, that's a lie I'm sorry, but I tried I tried

If it means anything I'll stay quiet I'll love you silent Just not as good as you

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you I just wanted to thank you I needed yo see you You're hard to quit You smell so sweet And you love me And I'm sorry And I'm sorry

If I were to lose you Oh if I were to lose you It'd be all my fault I wouldn't say a word to get you to stop if you'd never return if I were to lose you I I were to lose you If I said goodbye Know that I never meant it know that I second guessed it and that I will regret it for the rest of my life if I were to lose you tonight tonight, Tonight you love me, tonight you do At least, you say so So Tonight I'll sleep well for tonight I have you but if tomorrow I were to lose you I'll never say goodbye I'll never let anyone take your plave It's our place It's our house It's our heart beating in me If you were to leave, it would cease

Your bones, sun bleached Alone out of reach Churned dirt, fresh sown grass Unearned praises, roses at last At last, to last

Give me some hope on wishing bone Give me a single candle to blow Give me some hope like the first breaking light To pierce the blankness on the dark night

Give me a dull hope, of the unknown Give me some hope, give me some hope

Dead things, chased by rats Unfinished work, incomplete ends All the deeds, passed on Distant memories, “you remind me of someone” All that once belonged Is now passing on

Give me an afterlife Promise me one more time Give me an answer Say it’s you in a shiver Give me a pastor Let me hear you in the choir Give me a ray of sun Give me a rapture Give me some hope Burn and glow

All of the graves, that we make Into crosses, into gods What you live to love What you die to see What you want more badly than anything

I’ll bleed into the ground  In a ritual of how To bring you back To bring you back