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"Oh, here we go," Zanka groaned, laying harder into the pillow after hearing that. Jabber just snickered, laying on the cleaner's bare chest and looking up at him. "Why? Why do you always ask the weird questions when we're in bed?"
"It's a good one. I promise." Zanka couldn't help but be skeptical but there was only one way to find out. He just rolled his eyes. "...Pleeeeease?"
"What?"
"...Do you ever wonder about the size of people's dicks?"
"Okay, first of all, what the hell?" Jabber just started laughing, clutching onto Zanka as the cleaner stared at him. "Like... People I know or random people-?"
"Okay, so, overheard some people talking about this musician they like. I didn't have anything to do so just started listening to them thirst for the guy... and it dawned on me... No one wants to admit that someone they like might not have as big a cock as they think." Zanka was still speechless. Mostly because Jabber looked so serious. It was like the raider pieced together some long lost hidden truth. "Like... See, I bet Zodyl has a small dick-" That got Zanka, forcing a laugh from him and making the grin on Jabber a little wider. "You get what I mean right?! You never know-"
"Why, on the ground, are you even thinking about this-"
"I told you why-!"
"Also, should I be offended that you brought this up with me after sex!?"
"I mean... I was expecting a little more from you once upon a time but I'm not disappointed-"
"I'd choke you, but I'm not ready for a third round yet so I'd rather not rile you up." Zanka rolled over, forcing Jabber to get off him. The raider wasn't deterred, snuggling into Zanka's back with a flirty pur.
"You know who else is probably lackin' in the dick department-"
"Wild ass sentence-"
"Enjin-"
"Watch it-"
"Why, have you seen it?" Jabber sat up, smirking as he looked down at the cleaner trying to ignore him. "Awww, should I be jealous, Zan Zan? He bigger than me?"
"No I- ugh, I just... It's a vibe, you know? I'm pretty sure Enjin's hung-"
"Bet Follo ain't."
"Why are we talking about this-"
"Oh, you know who probably is though. What's that supporter's name? With the cool scar?"
"...Gris?"
"Yeah, him! He's probably got a big dick. Probably bigger than Enjins-"
"Stop, I'm ignoring you." Zanka had to try to not smile. He didn't want to think about it... but it was admittedly funny. He lost his battle of will, chuckling weakly. Excited, Jabber practically climbed on him and leaned over him.
"You're laughing!"
"Keep your voice down... The only people that need to know you're here is me and Shikage...and Semiu... and Corvus- fuck, this is not a well kept secret-"
"Your boss man's probably hung like a horse-"
"Shut up. I'm ignoring you again-"
"What about me, Zan Zan? Did I meet your expectations?" Zanka pursed his lips. He didn't know how to answer that question. It felt like a trap. Jabber grabbed his shoulder, forcing Zanka back on his back so he could pin him down. He stared at him, eye contact unrelenting. "You gonna answer, or?"
"...You won't like the answer." That crack in Jabber confidence made Zanka smile... which only further made Jabber cross. He huffed, losing his grin slowly.
"Fuck is that supposed to mean?"
"...Okay so," Zanka took in a deep breath, prepared for the chaos this might cause. "You... were bigger than I thought you'd be-"
"Wait what!?"
"Keep your damn voice down, idiot-"
"Wait, no, hold up," Jabber scoffed. Zanka couldn't help but enjoy this. "What about me radiates tiny dick energy?"
"I don't recall saying that but I had a feeling you would take it that way. I just said you were bigger than I thought." Now Jabber was annoyed, rolling over in bed and turning his back to Zanka. The cleaner clicked his tongue, staring at his boyfriend's back. Zanka snuggled up to him this time before wrapping his arms around him. "I knew you wouldn't like the answer... Even though you gave me a worse answer-"
"Yeah but... you gotta admit: You got some big dick energy, Zanka," Jabber shrugged. He giggled a bit too loud but Zanka didn't hush him this time. "So my expectations were high... but you're still more than capable of handling me."
"Idiot."
"Oh, You know who else I think is secretly packin'?"
"No. Can we drop the topic, Jabbs?" Zanka kept on hand on Jabber's stomach but the other took a firm hold of Jabber's throat. The raider bit his lip, grinning as Zanka whispered in his ear. "Or do I need to remind you there's only one persons cock you should be thinking of?"
I'm not a strictly bottom Zanka or bottom Jabber believer. I think if you watch them go at it you can't even tell who's topping. Shit just looks like a crime scene. Crime of passion in progress.
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So I've been combing through my AUs, seeing what needs a more concrete story and becomes a WIP vs what has enough and will just be worked a little and posted as finished.
Honestly, the Blind Zanka AU might just be added to minimally and posted as finished.
The Dearly Departed AU and Monster AU are going to become WIP because I have plots for those. The Retail AU will become a WIP too but I gotta think up a long term plot for it.
I'm dropping the Tarantula/Exotic collector AU entirely. Same with the stripper au. What I've already written for them is of course staying up.
Swap AU is up in the air right now. I don't know what I'm going to do with it.
A lot of words are going to be the same but it won't just be a copy paste job. I mean it will mostly but I plan on adding more detail, sprinkling in plot, etc. Bear with me as I get everything organized. It will hopefully be worth it.
When someone is left with their thoughts, it gets overwhelming fast. In the dark of the infirmary, the moonlight in the window was the only light. Zanka couldn't see the ceiling but stared in it's direction, his brain making up shapes in the shadows. The cleaner couldn't stop fidgeting. He was just not able to get comfortable. This damn cast. His arm itched underneath it. He felt bad hating it. Eishia made it magenta for him. All his friends signed it... and Rudo.
There were doodles all over it. He should be grateful but he wanted out of this thing now. He glanced over at Lovely Assistaff, leaning at his bedside. She was waiting for him to get better. He had to endure... but damn he can't get comfortable like this. His choker chirped on his wrist. He groaned, answering with a fake sleepy voice.
"Ugh... Hello?"
"Zanka, Your secret's on the way up." Semiu teased, her voice crackling a bit through the connection. "If you need me to keep anyone out of the infirmary, just let me know."
"...Thanks, Semiu." He left it at that. She hung up and he couldn't help but pout. Great. He was hoping HE wouldn't come by for at least a week. That's how long the accelerated healing would take to heal his broken arm. The bastard would probably ask all sorts of questions and laugh about it. Zanka closed his eyes. Maybe he could pretend he was asleep. He listened. The silence was deafening. There were bumps and sounds from further in Cleaner HQ, sure, but they were so faint that he could tell there was no one near him in this wing of the building. Metal tapping on the glass made Zanka flinch. He hoped his company didn't see that. It would be a dead giveaway that he's awake. Silence again.
Zanka rolled his head to face the window but kept his eyes closed. He knew the raider wasn't convinced. He knew he was up. The light shuff of the window being slid open made his breath hitch. Hearing him close it damn near made him sweat. He could feel him in the room. Staring down at him in bed. Zanka was sure his lip was quivering. He had to fight the urge to bite his lip. A light chuckle made his heart race. Zanka could feel a slight pressure but wasn't aware a finger was running down the length of his arm cast.
"Mmm...Nah, I didn't do that...Sooo... Where did this come from?" The whisper started at a reasonable distance but after a pause Zanka could feel the raider's lips ghosting over his ear. The groan he made was involuntary but it was no use. He knew he was awake. "Morning~"
"What do you want, Jabber?"
"To see my man... but only to find out you're cheatin' on me. Damn."
"I'm not cheating on you jackass," Zanka finally opened his eyes, looking up and meeting Jabber's. That smirk on his face. He wanted to kiss it and then smack it off him. "This... this was an accident."
"Well, I didn't think you did the shit on purpose." Jabber sat on the edge of the bed, unable to take his eyes off the cast. "...I like the color."
"I asked for it on purpose... matches your eyes. Least I could do since you can't sign it."
"I'll make space to sign it-"
"You can't sign it because we're a secret, dipshit."
"What happened?" Zanka stared back at the window, scoffing as if that was a stupid question. Jabber didn't mind. That was a sign his pride was wounded... so it was a very stupid reason. "...Did you fall down the stairs-"
"No."
"Training accident with the spherite?"
"No."
"...Hit by a car?"
"Can we drop it?"
"I just wanna find out what put you in a cast." Jabber teased, putting his hand on the thick thing. Zanka bit his lip, looking in any and every direction to avoid looking at Jabber. The raider knew what to do. He leaned a little closer to Zanka, biting his tongue as he planned his next words. That damn Nijiku pride could only be met with sweetness. That always made Zanka melt. "Zankaaaa...I'm worried, Zankaaaaa," The raider pouted. The cleaner did glance at him, his light blush unnoticeable in this light. "You're really gonna make me guess?" The raider started to play with the fingers dangling out of the cast. Zanka couldn't help it, choking back a little laugh at the contact. Suddenly, Jabber had a way better idea. Jabber stared at him, realizing what he just learned. "..Oh? Zan Zan... You're ticklish-?"
"Don't-" Jabber pulled the blanket away slowly. Zanka didn't try to stop him. Jabber hovered over him, putting his hand under his shirt, running it up the cleaner's stomach and letting his wrist reveal more of Zanka's skin. Zanka held his breath, his gaze shifting between Jabber's hands and his eyes. "...I will bite you if you tickle me."
"...Is that supposed to make me stop?" In hindsight, Zanka should have known. Jabber kept is his fingers on Zanka's hips, licking his lips slow. He was teasing at this point, just staring into the cleaner's eyes. "...How'd you get the cast?"
"...Oh, What, are you going to torture me if I don't tell you?" Zanka scoffed. Jabber started to rub his sides with his fingertips. The last chance. The threat. Zanka remained strong. "Fuck You."
"...Okay then..." That silence was left to sit for a minute. Then brutality. Jabber didn't believe in starting slow. You get everything from the jump. His fingers got to work Zanka only had one hand to muffle himself with. Damn this cast. Zanka squirmed and thrashed under Jabber, begging for leniency in the middle of his rampant laughter. He tried to shake him off, whining pitifully in his laughing fit. Looking up at Jabber's grin pissed him off incredibly. The raider stopped, letting Zanka get the giggles out and catch his breath. His teeth let go of his other hand, deep bite marks on it. There was no hiding that. "Zanka... How'd you get the cast?"
"...I... will send you... STRAIGHT to hell... when I'm out of this cast..."
"Talking dirty to me won't make me stop asking, Zan Zan~"
"Don't do it again-" Jabber took his hand holding it firm and keeping one hand on the cleaner's hips. The horror on Zanka's face made the raider chuckle. "N-No... please. No- Everyone will hear-"
"Just tell me what happened and nobody's gotta know you're ticklish. Because trust me... I'll make sure everyone can hear that cute laugh."
"...F-Fine," Zanka practically spat that answer. Jabber let him go, smiling cutely as he waited for the cleaner to give him his coveted answer. "Okay so... I was on a ladder and Rudo was pissing me off. I grabbed Lovely to point her in his face... threaten him a little... and the end of her accidentally clapped the ladder closed."
"Aw, you fell off a ladder? That sucks. I was hoping it was cool."
"No, the ladder isn't exactly what did it... you see... Lovely was transformed... and I fell on the blunt end of her." Jabber just looked at him for a second. Then he started laughing. Zanka panicked, shushing him wildly but it was no use. "K-Keep your voice down! You're not supposed to be here!"
"Oh man, Lovely broke your arm!?"
"She didn't mean to! Now shut up!" Zanka threw himself back in bed, looking back out the window. "Leave me alone. Just go."
"Hey, don't be like that, okay?" Jabber's laughing did die down but his amusement was obvious on his face. "Look, it happens... Hey, Mankira's taken my ass out a few times."
"...You stab yourself on purpose."
"You want comfort or not?" Zanka did puff out a chuckle, so Jabber considered that a victory. "Can I sign your cast?"
"If anyone sees it-"
"I mean, I won't put my name. Just a little symbol that only you would understand." That compromise got his attention. Zanka made a show of thinking it over but he had decided the moment he said that. He sighed and rolled his eyes.
"Fine. If you want. There's a marker on the side table." Zanka laid back and watched. He wasn't able to do much else anyway. The cleaner's soft smile stayed the entire time Jabber was drawing the little ring on his cast.
We're already on chapter 111 of Janka Junk Drawer. I started this collection of my musings and writings in May have posted something almost daily since. There's something for everyone if you've never checked it out before.
I am going to pour as much love into this subsection of the fandom as I can. Janka in all forms is loved an appreciated. We all got our place in this hell somewhere.
"Would you love me if I was a worm?" The second it passed Jabber's lips Zanka paused. The raider's smile grew wider as each second passed, holding back snickers as Zanka's face shifted between various stages of confusion. He swung his foot carelessly, sitting on the edge of the fallen wall with Jabber leaning annoyingly against him. Out in the wastes, just the two of them, no one else to hear that stupid question.
"Yes." Zanka said simply. Jabber grinned, but his boyfriend had an oddly serious look on his face. "I think I would."
"You think?"
"Well, It would be interesting to see a worm with your bloodlust. After all, worms are fairly docile. It would be kinda cute to see you try and bite me." Zanka smiled. As he went on, Jabber's amusement dwindled to a humble disbelief. "Plus, you'd be easy to keep since you'd be so small. I could make a little tank for you. Of course, I would need water in there to keep you hydrated... The only downside I can think of is that wouldn't be able to be... intimate anymore. But, that's a good trade off for you being silent." Zanka shrugged. When he looked back at Jabber he was just staring at him, almost mindlessly. "...Why? Were you planning on becoming a worm anytime soon."
"...Uh... Nah... not really."
"Idiot." The cleaner scoffed. "What about you? Would you love me if I was a worm?"
"Huh oh... sure. I'd just keep you in my pocket-"
"I'd die in there."
"I'll pour some water in there sometimes I guess-"
"You could have just said no."
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
"Would you love me if I lost all my teeth?" Jabber asked, leaning back in Zanka's desk chair. He was waiting for Zanka to finish his nightly routine with Lovely Assistaff. He looked at him, a hopeful look in his eyes. Zanka continued to oil his staff, glancing over at Jabber with a light smile.
"...It would be nice to get head from you and NOT worry about you biting my dick off. So, that's a major plus already." The second Zanka began weighing the pros and cons Jabber got more excited. He listened intently, his eyes big. "You'd have a harder time talking, also a good thing... but you'd be limited in what you eat and while that doesn't effect me too much I would miss how excited you get when we get wings... plus you couldn't eat the bones anymore like a wild animal and honestly I've... always thought it was kind of adorable when you do that."
"Wait, really?"
"Yeah, I don't know... I used to be put off by it but it grew on me..."
"Huh..."
"Plus, I guess if you had no teeth that means no more love bites... and... I like those too much to part with them. But... if I'd still have you then that's okay..." Zanka admitted, red in the face. Jabber let out a loving sigh. "What about you? Would you love me if I had no teeth?"
"...Hmm I don't know... You'd look weird-"
"Good to know that's your line-"
"Nah, I'm joking. I would. Promise." Zanka couldn't help but smile hearing that. Jabber let him finish his routine uninterrupted.
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
"Would you kiss someone else for 10 million Galla?"
"Yes." When Zanka answered Jabber felt his eye twitch. Zanka wasn't even looking at him. They were lying on the ground, bruised and bloody after a fun night. They were staring at the sky, catching their breath after that workout. "Easily-"
"Easily?" Jabber sneered, turning his head to glare at his boyfriend. Zanka still didn't look at him. "You'd really kiss someone else for money?"
"Yeah. I get 10 million and get to watch my possessive boyfriend go crazy on somebody." Zanka tried to laugh but the pain in his stomach kept him from being too gleeful. That explanation started to calm the raider. "I... I've never told you this before... but I kind like that crazy look in your eye you get when you get jealous." Jabber was speechless, looking over at Zanka. "It makes me feel... wanted, I guess. The idea that you would tear through anyone and anything for me... of all people... it's comforting, I guess." Jabber still didn't know what to say, embarrassed at how out of control his heart was. "What about you? Would you kiss someone else for 10 million Galla?"
"...No... I got everything I want... but if you promise to go just as crazy on whoever I kiss, that would be pretty fun to watch."
"I would. No worries."
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
"If I was in your ex's body and they were in mine, who would you kiss first?"
"Oh, that's a tough one," Zanka tapped his chin, thinking it over. He had raised the spoon to his mouth but the broth was pouring out of it as he was lost in thought. Jabber waited patiently, ignoring his own food as he did so. "Uh... I don't know. Genuinely. How do I switch you back?"
"Let's say you can't."
"Fuck... uh.. I guess I'd take you with my ex's body I guess... I don't want to but I fell for your personality so..."
"Aww really?"
"Yeah, it shocks me too, but I did." Zanka's little jab got the raider to laugh. The cleaner smiled, always warmed by that sound. "You'd probably enjoy having boobs, so you wouldn't mind the switch too much."
"...That does sound nice... Are they big?"
"Nah, not really." Zanka shook his head. "...Damn, but I'd miss sleeping with you. This is the worst one you've ever asked me.... What about you? What if I swapped with your ex?"
"Threesome-"
"Damn, why didn't I think of that?" Zanka dropped his spoon back in his bowl and Jabber's rampant laughter followed.
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
"If we were trapped somewhere and you died first would you let me eat you?"
"...Yes..." Zanka pondered that one, leaning on his hand as he began to mull it over. Jabber snickered about it, snuggling up to Zanka's chest. In the afterglow, the raider was always rather affectionate, kissing at Zanka's chest . "Sure. Yeah, go for it."
"Really?"
"I mean... if I died, I think I'd be okay with that... if it kept you alive for a little longer..."
"Aw, babe," Jabber playfully bit Zanka's shoulder, forcing a laugh from the cleaner. He had to keep it quiet though, not wanting to wake anyone around HQ. "I'll keep that in mind~"
"You're going to eat me dick first, aren't you?"
"Well... See, I don't know," Jabber laid his head on his chest, making the cleaner snort. He could hear his heartbeat. "I wanna... but also, I kinda want to save it for last so I can use it-"
"What the fu- With what bloodflow, idiot?"
"Oh, you know what, you're right. Yeah, then I'd eat it first." Zanka's snickering had Jabber bouncing on his chest. He loved it, clinging to the cleaner.
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
"If I got into a really weird kink, would you try it for me-"
"That's our whole relationship, Jabber." That response got the raider to howl, his laughter filling the area. The only louder sound was the rain. Their walk was interrupted by it, the two seeking shelter under a little abandoned shack. "Do you really think I was getting stabbed during handjobs in my last relationship?"
"I mean like, REALLY weird shit."
"I choke you, sometimes-"
"Think weirder."
"You're into blood play, Jabs-"
"Like WAY WEIRDER."
"Weirder than when I step on your-"
"YES. Weirder!"
"...Like what?" Zanka was afraid when Jabber leaned over. He whispered in his ear. Zanka's confusion bloomed into disgust and horror and back to disgust. Jabber's giggling in between wasn't helping either. "Wh-Wait- NO, NO! No way!"
"Really, No?"
"NO!"
"Not even for me~?"
"Absolutely not!"
"I've found your limit," Jabber teased, feeling proud of himself as he leaned back on his hands. Zanka looked at him, his brows knitted. Jabber enjoyed his victory... for a moment.
"...Once." Jabber thought he didn't hear that for a second. He looked over, his breath caught in his throat as he looked at the resignation on Zanka's face. "...For you... I might... try once."
"...Wait, really?" Jabber's voice was soft, a mix of touched and in disbelief. "For me?"
"Yeah... I mean... I do a lot of things with you I never thought I'd do so... what's one more?" Jabber couldn't help but just stare at him, a harsh blush taking over his face. Zanka chuckled weakly, seeing the effect that had on the raider. "...Everything alright?"
"...I love you."
"Love you too... So uh... enough with the dumb ass questions, okay?"
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jabber asking zanka all the silly relationship questions like "would you still love me if I was a worm🥺" and zanka genuinely taking time to think about his answers and reasoning behind them
I'm gonna try to draw some stuff for it because I really want to but be warned it'll look kinda silly cause I'm not an artist. Idk why Janka just makes me want to draw.
Warning ahead, Sui mention. I think I tagged this right.
🪦 When someone dies, they find themselves in The Ground. The Ground is ruled by a council of highly powerful spirits that sort through the new dead and decide their ultimate fate
🪦 The city is home to many spirits that have adjusted to life in this in between plane
🪦 There are near infinite possibilities of afterlives.
🪦 When you get your summons to meet the council they will tell you the options of afterlives you can pick. Some people run away to the human world to avoid being given the choice.
🪦 If you are in the human world too long as a spirit, you can slowly be corrupted by your environment. This turns you into what's called a feral. The longer you are there the more you corrupt, leading to becoming an Evolved Feral
🪦 If the trauma surrounding your death is strong, you become Haunted by an object that represents your death. It becomes a vital instrument in the afterlife.
🪦 Most people name their vital instruments to seize control back from their cause of death and feel empowered.
🪦 Lovely Assistaff is the Branch Zanka hung himself on. He couldn't stand to look at her for a long time.
🪦 The Ground ends up becoming a lot of spirit's choice for an after life because they spend so much time there awaiting their judgement.
🪦 Spirits can visit the human world, however it's rare for them to be able to directly interact with the world. It's easier for feral's to interact with the living world but at the cost of their sanity
🪦 Zanka is afraid to check on how his family has been handling life after his death.
🪦 People who are murdered have a higher chance of ended up haunted.
🪦 Jabber actually adapted to death quickly. He already prefers it over being alive. He likes chilling in the human world and seeing what living people get up to.
🪦 No one knows how Jabber can spend so much time in the living world and Hasn't gone insane. Zanka thinks it's because he was insane to begin with.
I have a lot more details but I'm working on this story and low key wondering if I should make it its own story or just keep it in Janka Junk Drawer. Let me know how you guys would prefer to interact with this story
Jabber x Zanka (Not so much in this first part but I plan on it getting more Janka. Trust.)
"W-Where am I!?" The kid clenched his fists, trying to grip ground too smooth. The tiles beneath him were cold on his knees and as he looked up he was met with a woman holding a clipboard. He couldn't understand it. What is this facility? He wasn't here a minute ago. "What's g-going on..?"
"Rudo Surebrec?" The Woman started, tapping her pen on the clipboard. He was stunned. He could only nod. "My name is Semiu Grier. I am your Afterlife guide."
"...My... you... Wait, What-"
"You're dead."
Semiu said simply, nodding as she jotted down some things. "Welcome to The Ground." He had no idea how to react. He was just frozen. He was still blinking so Semiu took note of that. "Good, you haven't passed out. You'd be surprised how many new deads hear the news and conk right out."
"Hold up... T-This is some dying delusion, right? I-I can still be revived-"
"Yeah, No shot," She shut him down with a shrug. "It takes a few days after death for your spirit to appear in The Ground. So, sorry to say hon, you're undeniably dead." Rudo took that news as well as could be expected. Semiu was patient, walking over and sitting at a desk that Rudo didn't even notice at first. He was in an office. It was sleek, surprisingly normal. He stood, looking around confused. "Now, as an afterlife guide I'm here to give you the run down on how we do things on The Ground and then you're free to your own devices. Alright?"
"...Is this... the afterlife?"
"It's a space in between," She answered, smiling to be able to get down to brass tacks. She gestured for Rudo to sit at the chair in front of her desk. He did but it was slowly and cautiously. "The Ground is a purgatory of sorts. I suppose you could call it that. You'll be living here until you get your summons by the council. The council is a group of powerful spirits that decide your ultimate fate."
"...Ultimate... Like.. Heaven or Hell or-"
"There are a wide variety of afterlife's to choose from but not everyone can just pick.. Depends on how you lived your life, how you treated others, etc." Semiu continued. She opened her laptop, the tapping of her nails on the keyboard oddly calming for the young man. "You died rather young, so you likely will get one of the positive outcomes... which ones is up to them but they usually give you a few to choose from. That part is unpredictable. The council is very hard to read."
"...Are... you dead too?"
"Yep." She nodded, still looking into her laptop. "I was given a greenlight to go to a couple different afterlife's... but I chose to stay here. I got used to life here... and because it's so neutral here in The Ground I find the atmosphere more interesting. Yes, if you are looked on favorably by the council one of the options you can choose from is staying."
"...What if... you're bad?"
"Your soul gets destroyed." She said flatly. Rudo felt himself grow weak. "I should say, If you were a horrible irredeemable person, your soul gets put down for good. I've seen people who have been awful get offered at least one positive outcome... or the choice between some bad ones... It looks like your summons before the council is dated for 5 months from now. That's pretty soon. Usually they take a couple years. Probably because you're so young."
"Years?!"
"Years go by in a flash when you don't age. Trust me, you'd barely notice after a few months." She adjusted her glassed, clicking to print this information. As her printer started to whirr she leaned back in her chair. "I understand this is a lot of information. Don't worry, I've been assigned to you until you get settled. I'll make sure you're taken care of."
"What happens if I don't show up to the summons? D-Do they force me?"
"They as in the council? No. They as in the Cleaners? Absolutely."
"Cleaners?"
"The Cleaners are spirits that work for the council. They round up the spirits that avoid their judgement and force you to meet your maker... but trust me it's just easier for you to go to your appointment. Most people that skip out on their summons do so because they know they're in for the worst of it. You'll be okay." Rudo blinked a few times. He gripped the chair he was sitting in, his mouth wiggling as tears threatened to spill. Semiu frowned, sympathizing with the child heavily. Suddenly his eyes flickered red and she gasped. Her gasp snapped him out of it... then the chair started to run. Rudo screamed, holding the chair for dear life as it sprinted into the wall. He let go after that and it galloped around the room for a little longer before finally falling over.
"...D..Does that just happen here!?!"
"Nah, that shit was new," She motioned for him to approach her. Rudo dusted himself off, staring at the chair as if it would get back up. "Come here, Come here." She begged. The second he was within grabbing ranged she pulled him in, looking deep in his eyes. "...Ooooh... that changes things."
"..W-What?"
"You're haunted." She smiled. Rudo, terrified of that sentence, felt his face fall. "Let me explain. Sometimes, very rarely, when a spirit makes it here they are so haunted by their death that they develop powers based on it. Usually it's bound to an object... I'm guessing those gloves." Rudo looked at his hands. His gloves... Well, not his. The last time he saw them they were around his throat. "You know... I have a friend with the cleaners. Cleaners are haunted as well. They use their powers to help keep the peace. I could put in a good word for you. A job would certainly help you acclimate faster."
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
Breathe in. Breathe out. The man posed delicately atop his staff, meditating with his eyes closed and at peace. He was humming at first but that died down after a bit. It was a beautiful day in the park. Not many people were around. A weak smile curled onto his lips but it was short-lived. His phone rang with dulcet tones and all he could do was groaned. He lowered himself off his staff with grace, spinning his vital instrument out of existence with a flourish. Finally, he answered.
"What?"
"Hey, Zanka!"
"What's up, Enjin?" The man started to leave, arms crossed as he made his way out. "What's up? Some work?"
"Yeah. We got a new cleaner!"
"Oh great. Let me guess, I'm training the new dead?"
"Ding Ding Ding!" Enjin's tone did make him smile but Zanka shook it off. "Listen, I got an easy job for ya that you can take the kid on. Teach him the ropes."
"...He's a kid?" Zanka couldn't help but feel a twinge of sadness. "How di...is he near you?"
"Nah, went to the bathroom. Was hella surprised that he still had to do that."
"How'd he die?"
"Father strangled him." Enjin's answer made Zanka bit his lip. "Not surprised he got haunted. He's bound to his father's gloves-"
"Oh that fucking sucks. Need me to teach him how to use 'em."
"Yeah. Should be simple, He's getting the hang of it. He can bring items to life, it's so funny."
"Damn natural talents." Zanka mumbled, hoping Enjin didn't hear that. He headed out of the park, looking towards the city center at the giant mostly glass building. He always looked at it, wondering who the council was damning at this moment. "So, how much does he know about The Ground? How much do I have to teach him?"
"Oh, no worries. He got Semiu as an afterlife guide. He's pretty good on that. Just take him on a job and show him how we do things."
"Lucky. Wish I could have gotten Semiu when I first got here. She's thorough."
"Oh and if you pass by a corner store on the way here, get me some smokes." Enjin immediately hung up, giving the cleaner no time to protest. He wouldn't have, anyway. Enjin practically saved his death, after all. Zanka turned as he left the park, headed towards the nearest store.
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
Zanka stood at the main desk at Cleaner HQ. He just met Rudo and dammit he already hated the little brat. It felt wrong to think that about a child that was just murdered but he just had a very punchable face. Rudo and Zanka waited at the desk, no one on the other side. The
"...So uh... what are we waiting for?"
"Semiu."
"My afterlife guide?"
"She works our front desk part time..." Zanka shrugged. "Afterlife guides don't make much."
"...This society is going to take some time to get used to."
"You got a lot of time to do it. Don't worry." Zanka rolled his eyes, wishing he could put some headphones in so that he could ignore this little bastard. Semiu came into the front doors, nonchalantly walking to her desk as if they weren't waiting in front of it. Rudo was about to speak to her but Zanka raised his hand. "No, Shut up. If you bug her she'll take forever to clock in." He warned. Semiu smirked, taking a seat at the reception desk. She poked the power button, letting the computer boot up. Rudo tapped his foot, puffing up his cheeks.
"...Is she in yet-"
"You really don't listen, do you?" Zanka snapped. Semiu couldn't help but giggle. Once her computer booted up she was quick to log in and clock in.
"Alright... I'm in... You need a job?"
"You got one available?" Zanka asked, standing a little straighter and making his tone more neutral as he addressed her. She opened the database, humming to herself as she skimmed.
"Let's see... we got 2 Evolved Ferals. Interested?"
"Not with the new dead," Zanka groaned. He would have loved to take that one but would rather not bring the dead weight along. "Anything simple?"
".. Hmmm jobs are scant right now... Got an evolved Feral. They're also haunted."
"Oh that's so much worse." Zanka sighed, "...But if It's one I can handle that alone."
"What's a feral?" Rudo asked as Zanka already started to leave. Rudo panicked and followed him. "Hey, wait up!"
"Hurry up! We have work to do."
"What the hell's a feral!?" Rudo asked again. Zanka mostly ignored him. His phone vibrated. Good, Semiu must have texted him location details. "Answer me-"
"Damn, you're annoying. Ferals are spirits that ran away back to the human world to avoid their summons by the council. It's our job to drag them back kicking and screaming."
"....What did she mean by evolved?" Rudo tensed. Zanka took in a deep breath. This kid just died. This is all new to him. He should be a little more forgiving. He was more levelheaded the next time he spoke.
"...Being in the human world... DOES things to spirits... No doubt, when you were alive, you heard about ghosts... and types of ghosts. Shit like Banshee's, Wraiths, stuff like that."
"...Those are..." Rudo started to piece it together and Zanka nodded. "Whoa."
"Yeah... Side note: Banshee jobs suck. If you value your ear drums, don't take one."
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
The coordinates to them to a calm lake, fog settling on the water. Rudo was just as annoying for the whole trip to this plane of existence and Zanka hated this already. The lake looked calm but in the darkness it was obvious there was a spirit here. Zanka spun his staff into existence. Rudo couldn't help but look at it, mesmerized by the blue it glowed that matched his trainer's eyes.
"...Whoa...How... How did you die?"
"That's rude to ask." Zanka answered curtly, mostly hoping he would shut up. It was quiet. Too quiet. Zanka put some distance between him and Rudo, hoping that whoever was here would pick him to mess with. The quick sound of wet footsteps dragged Zanka's attention to the water. He barely reacted, the spirit running on top the water and nearly catching him off guard with a swipe. He twirled his staff, pivoting the bowed end to catch the spirit by the body. Thankfully it worked, stopping a sharp claw just inches from his face. He held his breath, looking down the arm towards the crazy eyes that were fixated on him. "...What the hell-"
"Damn, You're fast~" The spirit duck and rolled out of the way. The staff was far too big to move as quickly, resulting in a slash on the leg. Zanka immediately felt his muscles seize, his eyes opening wide as he realized he was just taken down... and in front of the new blood, dammit. Zanka got a good look at the offender as he hit the ground. Tall, wild dreads and an even wilder grin. Those claws, now glowing white with Zanka's blood. Rudo froze. What do you do when the guy training you gets taken down? Fortunately, the spirit before them just clicked his tongue. "Damn... That's it? man, I was gearin' up for a fight-"
"What the hell is your problem!?" Zanka tried to reach down to hold his leg but it was hard to move. The spirit looked down at him, disappointment on his face. "You were supposed to be a feral! You're clearly not too far gone because you're speaking to me! Why the hell didn't you appear before the council?"
"I wanted to fight the cleaners," He said simply. Zanka paused, staring up at this man in disbelief. "Name's Jabber. I heard the cleaners are some next level spirits. I spent my whole life takin' on all fighters so I wasn't gonna pass up the opportunity to see what you guys are made of... But then you just... went down-"
"You son of a bitch," Zanka grumbled, struggling to get upright, even using his staff as support. "What the hell did you do to me?"
"That's my poison." Jabber said, like it was a perfectly normal sentence. "Don't worry. It shouldn't keep you down too long. Not my strongest stuff."
"You piece of shit-!"
"Oh, you still got fight in you." Jabber teased, kneeling down to Zanka with a sinister smile. "I like that~. You know what, maybe it's my fault this didn't get to the good part. I DID nick ya pretty early. "
"This training isn't going well," Rudo mumbled, further embarrassing Zanka. Jabber groaned, putting his claws away.
"Aw, what? I'm a training mission? This is NOT what I was hoping for-" Jabber was shut up when the staff came around and knocked him right in the face. Zanka was able to get back to his feet with the momentum, holding his lovely staff close. He stanced up and when Jabber shook off that hit, he grinned. "ROUND 2. HERE WE GO. GIVE ME ALL YOU GOT!"
When Jabber lunged Zanka could feel his heart in his ears. His stance was steady, grounded, every muscle coiled like a spring ready to unleash. Jabber , wild-eyed and fierce, fingers curled like a predator ready to strike. Zanka's Lovely Assistaff swung in a wide arc, whipping through the air. Jabber darted forward, slashing fiercely, his claws scraping against the staff with a harsh, grating sound. Each strike was met with a parry or a block, the staff twisting and turning to deflect the savage blows. Their dance of offense and defense made a sinister gleam in Jabber's eyes. Rudo kept back, looking around for anything to help with. He could bring things to life. That was his power, right? He looked at his gloves, these damn things that ended his life were now supposed to be his tool? He took in a deep breath and ran off to find something.
The cleaner grunted, instantly adjusting his grip. Sliding both hands down to one end, he used the heavy end of his staff like a pendulum, swinging it in a brutal, sweeping arc aimed at Jabber's head. With an X-guard, the feral spirit caught the hit but was pushed back considerably by it.
"INCOMING!" Rudo yelled. Zanka was already facing that way and ducked. Jabber had to turn around and immediately got it by a runaway rowboat that sped at him. His eye twitched right before he got hit.
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
"Excellent takedown!" Enjin praised, patting Rudo on the back. Zanka stood by, beyond pissed by this turn of events. The new dead took the credit for his last job. As he was complaining, another coworker joined the mini party in the HQ lobby. She looked at Zanka with a smirk and he rolled his eyes.
"...What, Riyo?"
"Sounds like you trained him too well, huh?"
"Up yours."
"Hey, Zanka! Come on!" Enjin cheered. He gestured for the man to approach. "You're the trainer after all! His first mission wouldn't have been a success without ya!" The praise made his eyes watery. Enjin was praising him. HIM!? He felt so warm. Riyo looked at the look on his face and snickered. Before the celebration could really get going though, Semiu whistled.
"Glad everyone is happy. Now I've got some... interesting news for you all." Semiu leaned back in her chair, tickled by the information. Enjin didn't seem worried but Zanka had a bad feeling about this. "The feral you bagged earlier? Turns out he IS an evolved Feral. We don't know how he's not completely lost his mind. Maybe he never had one to begin with."
"Didn't seem like it," Zanka mumbled to Riyo, making her chuckle.
"Now, he went before the council and, get this, positive outcome-"
'Wait what!?" Enjin and Zanka freaked out at once. Rudo didn't completely understand, just cocking his head to the side. "Wait, so if the freak wasn't an awful person then why run in the first place!?" Enjin argued, suddenly stressed. Semiu could only shrug.
"Told the council he just likes to fight. Wanted to go up against the cleaners... council... gave him an offer, since he's haunted..."
"...Semiu... don't tell me-"
"Starting tomorrow. He's one of us." Semiu nodded, oddly smug dropping this bombshell. Zanka wished he could drop dead all over again. "Oh and Zanka... He's gonna need training."
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I don't really interact with fandoms. I tend to lurk in them to see content. When I tell people that they usually say:
'Yeah, some parts of the fandom are trash'
and if you're one of those people then I'm sorry to tell you baby girl but you're the reason I avoid interacting with fandoms.
I LOVE seeing people enjoy media their way. Seeing their spin on it and how they take things and seeing them love it so deeply is mesmerizing to watch. Using familiar characters to express feelings, work through trauma, or just to love them unapologetically.
It's the people that think there's only one way to enjoy media that make fandoms unfun for me. The people that gatekeep creativity and expression.
Inevitably someone is going to respond to this and say: Yeah but F people who do this or ship this. To those people, I'm sorry that you care about what someone else does so much that you can't just enjoy things on your own.
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