tuptup

I don't speak French so thank you to the many, many, many people in the notes going "Wait that's not 'can it' that's 'Shut the fuck up'"

the best joke in any movie. ever. no sarcasm. gets me every time.

i can’t relate to horror stories where it’s like ‘my wife started acting crazy isn’t that so scary?’ because i would support my wife no matter what i would love my crazy wife

big fan of media thats too homopobic to admit gay people exist yet nontheless operates with a homoerotic subtext so insane that none of the characters’ motivations make sense unless they carnally desire each other

the main thing that puts me off of playing chess is that there is 2000 years of gameplay that hundreds of people with higher IQs than me have spent thousands of hours studying the history of, so much so that when i put the pawn forward they say “ah i see youre going for the bulgarian somersault” and then i try to take their bishop with my knight and they go “aw, rookie mistake, youve played the frenchmans cumsock, and in approximately 37 moves i’ll have won”