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Bocius said: To gather for a game and slay goblins, is this not a joy? Is it not wonderful when schedules align? If no one shows for game night and I prep anyway, am I not a good GM?

The Grognard said: Each day I roll a retainer, to see his character. His body, his mind, his spirit. A die for each hand, is this not a man?

Bocius said: Without purpose, what good is a man to an adventure? You must examine his class, and know his skills in each attribute. You should appoint his training according to narrative.

The Grognard asked The Storygamer: When your character goes into town, does she appoint his retainers to the many tasks of seeking rumors of treasure? Do you not read the monster statlines?

The Storygamer said: My character brings her retainers with, she asks how is the shopkeep. I know only what the fishermen tell her of the orcs and the medusae.

Adding all the Lasers and Feelings hacks together into one, massive game.

We're listing rituals to make Undead

To Force a Shadow

Ok so for all your needs of generating encounters when your group inevitably goes here: (You know as well as I do that you're just itching for the chance)

Roll a D-However many to encounter one of:

A goblin with a skateboard (He's also an archmage)

Three teenagers

A mermaid barista riding on a witch's back, looking for her lost tamper

A gang of four geese, one each wearing: a peacock cape, an obsidian helmet, a pair of pantaloons, and a knife necklace

Two nyads and three shadows, who are friends but don't like that you came around and are harshing their vibe

A crow caped apothecary carrying his workshop on his back

A water fountain with a door in the statue. The door leads to the other fountain on the other side of the mall

Mimic Store: if you enter it, the cage shuts behind you. You must find the hidden staff exit.

Seventeen blind were rats

Yankee Candle Dragon

New system! The dSword system.

How to play:

Buy a sword (battle ready is better)

Play any game you'd like

Whenever you make a skill check, use your sword to threaten the GM

Have fun :)

A simple forage system for Dungeons and Dragons (and similar systems)

A monster may yield 1d4 "Carve" parts

Carve parts are denoted by the Monster Family and one of the following forms:

Blood

Black Bile

Phlegm

Green Bile

Essence

A Carve part will also have a Rank which is equal to the CR of the monster divided by Five (rounded to the nearest whole number).

Items whose recipes are known may be crafted by combining the requisite parts.

Example Carves:

Dragon Blood

Giant Black Bile

Demon Essence

Goblin Essence

Undead Phlegm

Example Craft Recipes:

Longsword

Goblin Phlegm I x3

Dragon Blood I x2

Beast Essence I x5

Undead Essence I x1

Alchemist Fire

Ooze Blood I x3

You know what? FUCK NUMBERS! This game uses COLORS

You have three stats:

Style

Taste

Talent

Each stat is assigned a color from ROYGBIV. Each color may only be used once (I see you, trying to make every stat red). And... that's it. That's your character. You play some sort of hipster art student or something. Probably wears a beanie and goes to indie art shows in the third ward.

Playing

The Curator (game master) will present a challenge for you. That challenge will have an associated color that they don't tell you. The vibes of the color and the vibes of the challenge will match (maybe read up on color theory and put some red in your children's hospital first). Based on those vibes you'll select a stat to use and describe how you use that stat to overcome the challenge. Then, the curator combines the color of your stat and the color of the challenge on the color wheel. The resulting color should describe the vibe of the outcome.

If your stat was the opposing color to the challenge, then you get a bad outcome and suffer a setback of some sort (idk, maybe your rent increases).

Girls just want to have a coup. Play a friend(ish) group of your favorite feminine archetypes as you find a way to stage a coup to overthrow the mayor (he knows what he did).

Favorite kinds of girls!

You can be any kind of girl you want (as long as it's on the list). The kind of girl you are will make certain tasks so absolutely easy that you can just... do it. Where other girls might struggle and have to make a skill roll (ugh), you're not like other girls. Anything you do that fits your stereotype will just work. And actually work, not todd howard work.

VSCO Girl

Tradwife

Big Tiddy Goth GF

e-Girl

Athlete

Fangirl

Astrology Girl

The Feminine Urge to have stats!

Everyone knows that stats are a spectrum. So every character gets three spectra on which to place themselves! Every character gives themselves a score from 1 to 10 on each spectrum, a score that they will try to roll over or under in various scenarios throughout the game

The Gaslight/Emptah spectrum

This spectrum denotes your emotional abilities. A low score indicates that you're good at gaslighting, while a high score means you're more of an empath. Roll over your score to gaslight, and roll under your score to do some empath shit

The Gatekeep/Enlighten Spectrum

This spectrum denotes your relational abilities. A low score indicates that you're good at gatekeeping, while a high score means you love to enlighten others. Roll over your score to gatekeep, and roll under your score to enlighten that bitch.

The Girlboss/Enable Spectrum

This spectrum denotes your attitude towards action. A low score indicates that you're a girlbossing bitch, while a high score means you're an enabler. Roll over your score to girlboss, and roll under your score to be an enabler.

When you try to do something which has a chance to fail, your GM will ask you to roll 1d10 against some skill (gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss, empath, enlighten, or enable). If your roll succeeds then you accomplish what you were trying to do (you go, girl). If your roll fails however, then not only do you not get what you wanted, but the situation gets worse somehow (if you want to be really cool and sexy then you could suggest a way for it to get worse to the GM). Rolling exactly on your score will always succeed.

Criticals When making a roll, you can (and will, eventually) roll on one of the extreme ends of your spectrum. When you're trying to roll high (G-skills) then you will critically succeed on a 10, and critically fail on a 1. When you're trying to roll low (E-skills) then you will critically succeed on a 1, and critically fail on a 10.

A Little Something Special

In addition to your archetype and your skills, every character can instantly succeed on a G-skill check (gaslight, gatekeep, and girlboss) by deciding to Be Toxic. If you Be Toxic to pass a check, then you will get -1 karma, and any relationship related to the check takes a -1.

Karma's a bitch

When you critically fail, if you have negative karma then the situation gets remarkably worse. Karma will go one step towards 0 (perfect balance 😌). But, uhh, don't rest too long on the euphoria of cosmic bliss. Your situation just went to shit.

Relationships?

All relationships start at a neutral value of 10. When someone likes you more, their relationship score will be higher. If they like you less, that relationship score will be lower. The relationship score doesn't necessarily relate to how close someone is. You can be very close to someone and still absolutely despise them. Use relationship scores as a roleplay aid.

Add on to this!