tryingagainpages

‎INFJ (4w3, 4-6-1), introverted, non-binary, bi, virgo.

‎Anime fan, gamer, cosplayer, writer, visual novel creator (hopefully).

‎I'm familiar with many fandoms. Even the forgotten and the little-known ones. But mostly, I'm close to :Awaria, Halltaker, Genshin Impact, Alien Stage, Star Rail, Zenless Zon Ziro, Sekai Project, SHTDN, Gravity Falls, KasuRih, Gumball's Adventures, My Little Pony. This is the basis.

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‎Animators/artists I love: Koruma, Avogado6, Mimi N, Pixel art. 

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‎Also, I like Japanese street fashion and music. Reflection and psychology.

‎I really like all kinds of questionnaires/tests/bingo. I'm so into all of this that I'm really interested in finding out "what kind of fruit I am." It's so stupid... but it's fun)

‎> It's especially difficult because of the restrictions that take away my simple joys. I know I need to hold on, but I'm almost exhausted. Sometimes, my thoughts lead me to places I'd rather not go.

‎> The only thing that saves us is treatment and the belief that better days may lie ahead. I don't ask for much: just a bit of stability and the ability to breathe freely. Thank you for reading this.

‎Falling asleep.. Woke up to go to the bathroom. Saw that the person had a trigger dream, so I sat with them. Falling asleep. Nightmare. Woke up. Felt shocked. Fell asleep. Nightmare. Wrote to the person. Fell asleep. Sleep paralysis. Woke up. Bad words. Fell asleep and woke up in the morning.

‎This is my first post here, and honestly, I’m not really sure how things like this are supposed to start. But I guess honesty is a good place to begin.

‎My username is tryingagainpages.

‎I decided to keep an open personal diary here, but anonymously. Just a place where I can write my thoughts as they come — without filters and without the need to look “normal.”

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‎There will be a bit of everything here:

‎my thoughts, emotions, sometimes just streams of consciousness.

‎Sometimes there will also be notes and reviews about anime, manga, visual novels, and other things that left an impression on me.

‎But really, this blog is about one thing.

‎I’m trying to start again.

‎I’m trying to slowly climb out of a long and painful depression and agoraphobia that have been affecting my life a lot. I want to learn how to live again instead of just surviving day after day. Small steps, page by page, post by post.

‎Maybe this place will become something like a recovery journal.

‎Maybe just a quiet corner of the internet.

[‎‎EN: I’ll be writing my posts in English, but I’ll also post a Russian version in the comments.]

‎If you’re here — thank you for reading. 🌙

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‎— tryingagainpages.