HEAVENLY SPARK OF IGNITION

doc, my advice fetish is taking over my life, i just dont know what to do.......... (lecherous look appears in my eye)

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

the Los Angeles Ants have signed ants to a 10 year 1000000000 crumb contract

Damn, what does Los Angeles get?

ants

shoutouts to women who have druglike aoe effects i love you women who have druglike aoe effects

basically the best feeling in the world is when im like lightly dazed and a little clingier than usual and i feel myself just naturally agreeing with everything im being told and echoing things a lot and my voice is a little higher pitched and i cant seem to take my eyes off the girl next to me and

you know how bug bites are scientifically measured by that one guy that lets them bite him and goes "yeowch! preddy hurts.... one million paindollars to this ant?" they should let me do that with intensity of brainwashing / mesmerizing / aoe effects. id be literally so great at it

girls covering their face with their paws in embarrassment voted cutest thing ever

Basically if you give me really good deep scalp scritches I'll go along with anything else you suggest

ohhhhh what the hel, bring it in everyone ! (spiral starts forming in the ground)

they love me because I be saying shit like alas and perchance

last night I said 'how fortuitous' unironically

girl with a marriage fetish getting really flustered when people call her posts "engagement bait"

little miss auditory processing disorder would like you to repeat what you just said then immediately respond to you before you finish

it's always "why do you pace so much" and never "how was the pacing was the pacing fun"