oh, peacemaker

— Vulgate Cycle: Lancelot Part VI

[image id: An excerpt from a book. The excerpt says: "When all was finished and there was nothing left of the knight, the king said so that all could hear that he had never seen such a wondrous occurrence, "and I always said we'd see wonders produced by this seat; we've seen some, and we'll see others, I believe." /end id]

look, look, you could argue that because arthur's love for lancelot is being compared to his love for gawain's in this passage, that the type of love arthur feels is the same familial love he feels toward gawain. BUT you could also argue that this passage starts by specifically saying gawain's love for lancelot is different from the love lancelot's family has for him, so when gawain's love for lancelot is compared to arthur's love for lancelot, arthur's love is also being differentiated from any familial love toward lancelot and is more similar to the love gawain feels for lancelot, even though the quanity of love arthur feels for lancelot is being juxtaposed against his familal love for gawain. therefore, if we see gawain's love for lancelot as romantic, arthur's love for lancelot should also be read as romantic. therefore, this is a win for us arthur/lancelot truthers.

i'm about 40% of the way through and i have one major thought so far (this is not a complaint, just to be clear):

kay's love for guinevere reads more like a comp het crush than it does genuine romantic love. in the 100+ pages i've read so far, i don't think i can think of a single instance of kay actually thinking about a quality of guinevere's that he likes. maybe i'm forgetting something, but i really feel like we only know he supposedly loves her because he and other characters are constantly thinking about/remarking on his jealousy. he's jealous that someone else is fighting for her. he's jealous that someone else is comforting her. when he's thinking about lancelot fighting meliagrant he's more fixated on the fact that lancelot took the opportunity for kay to clear his own name than the actual danger the accusation put guinevere in.

he's so fixated on the men around guinevere that she herself is basically a second thought. my man seems to have just decided he needed to make it seem like he was in love with a woman so he went with the most obvious choice ever—who wouldn't love guinevere? she's pretty! she's the queen! she's completely unattainable so i never have to worry about forming any romantic relationships with other women as long as i can keep up the charade of jealousy!—and then used her relationships with impressive men as a way of fixating on them without it seeming weird from an outside perspective because, again, he can plead jealousy.

including that would have made mordred killing lancelot and guinevere so much more satisfying bc as it is everything going on with mordred is pretty disconnected from everything going on with the pendragons but this would show the breakdown in trust that leads to mordred feeling like killing them is necessary.

and also i think it would have been fun + would have given lancelot more characterization to see him grapple with the conflicting feelings of

"i love arthur and i'm willing to kill anyone who poses a threat to him"

vs

"if this new prophecy is right and mordred is arthur's son, then there's also a prophecy that mordred can help save the world"

and

"could arthur forgive me for the murder of the son he'd thought dead and has been grieving all this time but in reality was only lost and is now found?"

+ if you assume, as i do, that the pendragons were all equal co-parents, then you also get lancelot dealing with the fun anguish of:

"can i kill my son for the sake of my lover?"

"would arthur forgive me if i did?"

and having to decide between grieving mordred a second time, this time knowing he's for real dead bc it's by his own hand or potentially grieving arthur bc he couldn't bear to kill his own son even knowing what might come of it, ultimately choosing to do nothing in the moment because his love for both mordred and arthur demands it.

and of course he'd talk to guinevere about it and she'd tell him that mordred wouldn't hurt anyone, that lancelot should keep quiet. she might start siding with mordred more when he and arthur disagree about relations with the saxons and taking a more peaceful approach to things generally. she might start treating him more like a son. which would baffle arthur, but would tip mordred off to the fact that she knows about the new prophecy.

(but of course it's too late—guinevere's silent acceptance of him can't undo the damage that's been done. mordred saw the look in lancelot's eyes. he knows what lancelot was considering and—whether lancelot is just a beloved friend and leader or a father—it's enough to cause or worsen the cracks in his sanity that ultimately lead to mordred killing lancelot and guinevere (not to diminish gawain's role in that; he definitely plays the main part, but i have a whole other slew of thoughts on that))

Summary: Faced with the prospect of his child's mortality, Arthur Pendragon decides to test the limits of the Hanged Man's immortality.