new years resolution for 2026: become evil! @transharmfulguy - Tumblr Blog

i couldve sworn i had an ask in my inbox asking about transSzPD + transASPD tips, but it's disappeared off of the face of the earth..

anyways. idk how much help i'll be on account of i'm not an expert, but here are some things to consider/try out i guess??

obviously, research the conditions. not just the clinical descriptions of the symptoms, but the lived experiences of ppl with these disorders. reddit has both szpd and aspd subreddits to check out

be conscious of your goals for transitioning. know which symptoms you want to exhibit and which ones you can ignore.

build up a persona that embodies your transitioned self and practice with it. i enjoy immersive daydreaming, but i made this blog for practice as well.

i cant really speak on the lived experiences of aspd, since i dont have it, but below the cut i'll throw in some lived schizoid-adjacent experiences i deal with in my life.

note that i dont technically fit the diagnostic criteria, since our emotional stuntedness was being addressed in therapy throughout our adolescence, so i now have a larger emotional range that szpd would exhibit, but we were severely emotionally repressed for large parts of our life, so i have some experience to draw on still.

i rarely acknowledge my emotions, if i feel them at all i try to compartmentalize or rationalize them away, but repression is still second-nature to me

if something does trigger a significant emotional response in me, i become totally avoidant of it, especially if the emotion is negative, like discomfort, fear, anger or sadness

it feels alien to me to use my face to emote, due to how little emotion i feel. as a result, i have quite the case of resting bitch face, the majority of the time my face is entirely neutral. anger and frustration show on my face easier than other emotions

i dont experience loneliness, longing, yearning or missing someone. due to co-morbid disorders (notably bipolar), i have experienced brief bouts of obsession over an online friend we have, feeling desperate to talk to them again when theyd been offline for a length of time during a mixed episode, but i consider that to be a symptom of bipolar, rather than me actually having missed them.

i avoid talking to people wherever possible, i cant tolerate it. if im talking with a stranger or someone i dont know well, its awkward above all else. when talking with someone close with me, like my parents, i find it mind numbingly boring instead

i have little to no motivation to fix anything about my life, even if im dissatisfied with it. i would rather live in misery or kill myself than put in effort to change something of my own volition. the only reason anything is happening is either because i was forced to make a change or because someone else took care of it for me. oftentimes this falls on the other members of the system

+ a bonus aspd-adjacent lived experience

i let others take the fall for me whenever opportunity strikes with no regard over how this affects them

if anyone wants to hear some stories about how i'm getting "worse" & and adding aspd to my life, or details about szpd symptoms i exhibit rather than the short summaries here, shoot me an ask. maybe i'll even respond to it LMAO

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new years resolution for 2026: become evil!