we fucked up

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@tradiuz
we fucked up

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Painstakingly fix DRC errors and get hole alignment tweaked.
Add little hidden phrases for fun.
Forget to actually look at the input/output labels.
Check fab confirmation email and see that all my ports are labelled wrong. Guess this is the dysgraphia version of the front panel.
New GMS Sagamartha for an upcoming campaign. She'll be dubbed "How to Make Peace", piloted by a fallen priest callsign "Apostate".
To update this, the astronaut didnāt actually do it, she and her wife were getting a divorce and the wife plead guilty to lying to the feds about it
And framing your ex for a crime mid-divorce while they are actively in space is some Agatha Christie level shit
lesbians winning against 100% of all space false crime allegations
Only in stainless or chrome, oil rubbed bronze fans can meet me in the parking lot.

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I am shocked at how many people don't have an actively hostile relationship with advertising
Ads are hostile, gotta be hostile back.
Uh-oh
reading frankenstein rn and my take away so far is that there are disastrous consequences to letting twinks in stem be deadbeat mothers
If I could ask you for some advice, what do you think helps the flavour text of a mech or piece of equipment sell a player on the fantasy of using it?
I'm finding it frustratingly difficult to do so with my own homebrew content: I can come up with lore and backstory easily enough, but re-reading it feels dry, and I can't help but contrast it with how the descrptions in official content and other supplements is more evocative, at least for mechs.
Let's observe some corebook Lancer flavour text and examine the various varieties it comes in.
Purely Functional
While it's usually not the most fun type of flavour text, this just tells us what the weapon is, and - if it has any particular tags or on-hit effects - why it's like that. The Hand Cannon is a good example: here's what it is (modified pistol), here's why it does more damage, and here's why it has Loading.
The main advantage of Purely Functional flavour text is that it provides space for other types of flavour text to breathe. Flavour text is a great place for jokes, but it's not good for every piece of flavour text to be a joke - the pauses between notes in music are just as important as the notes.
Obfuscating Vendorspeak
The Bristlecrown Flechette Launcher this is a great example of dark humour that Lancer uses quite often: marketing fast-talk to cover up something really unpleasant. The joke here is based on us understanding precisely what the equipment does mechanically, and then seeing how the manufacturer tries to sell it. There's a bunch of dense technobabble here meant to obfuscate the fact that this weapon fires knives in every direction specifically designed to kill infantry.
Deadpan Weirdness
The joke here relies on describing something extremely weird like it's the most natural thing in the world. Wait, you're telling me that in a world where I can just print new parts if the old ones break, they put DRM on my fucking knife and I have to apologise to the fucking knife maker to get a new one? What the fuck, dude? Why are you acting like this makes any sense?!
My sword uploads fucking what to the Space Internet?!
Third-Act Twist
This type of flavour text disguises itself as something else - most often Purely Functional - and then hits you with Third Act Twist. It makes you go "wait, what?!" It's very classic setup-punchline stuff. You're telling me my mech can rot?!
As a side note, Lancer loves to use this for its NHPs.
WHY DID YOU PUT THAT IN SCARE QUOTES, LUCIFER
Worldbuilding
This is similar to the Purely Functional, but instead of just describing technical specifications of the weapons, it puts the weapon in the broader context of the setting's history. Okay, so we know what this weapon is and what it does - why was it built? What was the original use case, and why? Most importantly, what can the existence of this weapon tell us about the world that build it?
Whimsical Aside
This is the insertion of a light-hearted, humanising little insertion regarding how this piece of equipment gets used in the field. This serves to remind us that soldiers aren't cold, unfeeling killing machines: they can be as emotional, irreverent and silly as the rest of us, and they do things like name their mobile bombs...
... or call resupply drones "mech snacks."
The Ominous Out-Of-Context Quote That Explains Nothing And Only Raises More Questions
As I've said in multiple textmash memes, this is basically Tom and Miguel's shorthand for "this technology is Intensely Fucked Up in a way that it is more fun and scary not to explain." This is essentially Lancer's version of SCP's [REDACTED].
You might think this is the domain of HORUS, and you'd be right, but every single manufacturer indulges in these - although IPS-N had to wait until NRFaW to get theirs:
What the fuck do you mean by that, Lancer?

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Ice cold takes from a Transgender Woman:
Men are not inherently Evil
Everyone has the capacity for evil
Transgender Men are men
Transgender Women are women
Excluding Cisgender Men from your spaces requires Transgender Men to out themselves if they want to engage (Same for Women)
Anyone can be Non-Binary, there is no "look" or requirement
Non-binary masculine presenting people should be welcome in queer spaces, many are just treated as men and predators
Non-binary feminine presenting people should be welcome in queer spaces without being seen as "Woman-Lite"
Edited the wording on the first point because too many terfs keep thinking I'm their friend.
I think this comment by @smoldragonblood is really awesome so I wanted to include it in the post
Also being a man doesn't make you a bad person. Everyone has the capacity to be a bad person
i unironically believe electricity is the closest thing we have to magic in this universe. consider:
it's basically what human "souls" are made of (your consciousness is the result of miniscule amounts of electric charge jumping between neurons in your brain)
when handled incorrectly or encountered in the wild, it is a deadly force that can kill you in at least half a dozen different ways
when treated respectfully and channeled into the proper conduits, it is a power source that forms the backbone of modern society
if you engrave the right sigils into a rock and channel electricity into it, you can make the rock think
there is a dedicated caste of mages (electrical engineers) tasked with researching it in ivory towers
whatever the fuck Galvani was doing with those frog legs
look at this and just try to tell me it isn't a kind of summoning circle
have you fucking seen plasma

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The entire 3-minute city ambiance scene from Ghost in the Shell (1995) is already one of the best moments in all of cinema imo, but I NEED to talk about my absolute favorite part from it:
That brief moment when Major Kusanagi and a stranger with her exact same body model catch a glance at one another. How quickly the initial curiosity of seeing the doppelgƤnger turns into a feeling of unease as the boat carries her away.
She will never meet this stranger. She'll never know anything about her other than the simple reminder that every piece of her cybernetic body is not unique to her. There is no part of her other than her brain and all its memories that she has any true ownership of, and even that isn't immune to being hacked and potentially erased by outside forces. Despite being a part of a bustling city, all she can do is reflect on how utterly isolated she feels as a living being.
How can she possibly define her humanity when she herself is confined in the form of what is essentially a highly modified weapon? How can she relate to others when she has more in common with the mannequins on display in a shopping mall than with the any of the people walking the streets?
All of this inner turmoil at oneās own existence conveyed without a SINGLE word of dialogue spoken. Now that's the power of cinema if I've ever seen it!
Some people's Lancer homebrew content really does sound like "but what if you could buy weapons of mass destruction from an arms dealing megacorporation run by a young witch in the alps who just wants to fund the search for her neighbor's cat"
How dare you bury this in the tags.