making dental care accessible

about me:

hey, you can call me cj or jay (he/they)!! i’m a spoonie (autistic, adhd, ocd, endometriosis, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, and hypermobility spectrum disorder) located in the united states.

i’ve worked in dentistry since i was 19. fell into it completely by accident, and it became an unexpected passion of mine. now i want to use my knowledge to help my fellow spoonies take care of their teeth so we can all have healthy smiles for the rest of our lives!!!

on this blog i’ll be posting and reblogging educational information about oral health, and answering questions about teeth and how to care for them.

my ask box is open and, since dental health can be a sensitive subject for a lot of us, anon is enabled.

hey anon, this doesn't bother me at all!! and thank you so much for the kind words :)

so i was a treatment coordinator at my previous job, but when i moved back here to my home state, i took a position at a much smaller office. i'm now the only administrator on my team so i wear a lot of hats these days!! i manage the schedule, the revenue and billing cycle, keep insurance claims running and patient data up to date, put treatment plans and estimates together, and run the check in/check out desk. it's actually kind of nice to have lots of variety in my tasks; very different from doing one specialized role.

i've found that working in such a small practice means i get much more opportunity to connect with my patients one-on-one, which i absolutely love!! i've only been here a little over a year now, and i already know so many people by name and face, and we gab like old friends any time they come in. i don't do anything clinical, just the ticky tacky behind-the-scenes stuff that my boss would have a fit if he had to do himself😂 however, though i don't have plans to become a clinical assistant any time soon, you never know what the future holds!!

i have never been to any sort of dental school; i have a bachelor's degree in social sciences and a master's degree in creative and technical writing. i never expected to end up in this field. i actually originally wanted to be a middle school english teacher!! but life happened, and the dental receptionist job i randomly got in college ended up setting me on the path to where i am today, and i'm really happy with where i'm at these days. i was lucky to have a very robust training period at that first receptionist job, and talented and patient doctors who have helped me learn everything i know now about oral health. i think i'm in a unique position to do this project as someone with a knack for teaching and writing, both personal and academic experience with disability, and a good hands-on dental education.

thank you so much for wanting to get to know me a little more, and happy brushing!!

Thank you so much for this blog, I can't begin to thank you enough. I'm sure you helped many people, but me specifically, I've never ever been to a dentist, my parents never took us as a child. I've sort of created this thing about it in my head for years as a child, that now it's what's felt impossible, I'm feeling this counts as a phobia what I'm dealing with now, or maybe something close.

But I've been reading around this blog for a long while, during the time you've weren't active, and now you've given me motivation to search around for dentists in my area. It's not much, I haven't booked anything yet, but it's a step closer from where I've been my whole life, I suppose. I'm still very nervous about how an appointment would go, I keep playing it in my head, but I'm trying turn that part of my brain off while I'm searching about dentists here.

Hopefully I'll make it and it'll go really well, and I'll finally get help! Thanks a lot! 😊

hey anon, thank you so much for the kind words!! i'm so glad to hear that my blog has been a helpful resource for you. that's exactly why i started this project; to make information on dental care accessible to people who haven't had access to it before, connect people to resources that can help them get care, and take a lot of the mystery and fear out of it. it makes me so happy to hear that i've made a difference for you!!!

as you're looking for a dentist, i would encourage you to talk to the people in your life and see if they see a dentist they really like. also, read reviews for any potential provider before you call to schedule, see what their patients are saying about their experiences. i'd also encourage you, if you're comfortable, to let the staff know when you're scheduling that you're nervous and haven't seen a dentist previously. that will let them know that they might need to take a little extra time and walk you through the first visit process. you can also bring a trusted person with you to your visit to help keep you grounded and communicate with the provider if you, like me, have trouble communicating well when you're anxious.

i wish you luck and hope you find a kind, caring dentist :)

In the Handmaiden (2016), when the lady had a toothache, the maid got a thimble and rounded off the sharp tooth that was cutting into her mouth. Is this... advisable? Like, could I also shave down my dumb wisdom tooth that juts out with a thimble?? My dentist said the tooth itself, which has fully grown, isn't worth removing but it's getting annoying now.

hi anon, i would absolutely never recommend performing any sort of dental work yourself beyond basic brushing and flossing. your wisdom tooth may not be necessarily hurting anything, but if it bothers you i would definitely encourage you to ask your dentist what they can do. they might be willing to extract it at your request, or file it down enough that it doesn't hit in a way that bothers you. a lot of times, those adjustments are quite simple and some dentists will do them at no cost, especially if they're doing restorative work for you already!!

I went to the dentists for the first time in like 5 years this year 🎉

Had to get a bunch of work done. But I’m better now. I have gum disease (boo gum disease 👎🏾) due to depression/chronic illness + past struggles with disordered eating + iron definitely.

I also have REALLY really bad teeth genetics.

Gum disease is HEAVILY present on one side of my family while tooth decay to the point of dentures is on the other.

Seeing a family member have to get dentures made me kick my ass into gear!!!

Most of my pockets are unfortunately 3-5s 😩 they’ve healed pretty nicely.

Beside one spot towards the very back that still occasionally bleeds?

I also have OCD so I am very very worried all the time now about my teeth. Sometimes my gums kind of…ache? I had some problems with one of my fillings and they had to shave it down but that side, that tooth specifically feels very sensitive??? Could it be teeth grinding? Or should I bring it up at my follow up in a few weeks? ( pretty sure I have an overbite that’s been exacerbated by my wisdom teeth removal years Ago that’s left me with some TMJ in the jaw and once a very known incident of week long hiccup/air hunger like things because my tongue was throbbing and my jaw was just slightly misaligned enough 🙃)

Do you think a water pik is worth it? I’m unemployed right now but it’s the only thing I asked for Christmas/birthday later this year so 🤞🏾

I floss with the little plastic ones because I just can’t do the other ones. I’ve tried. It’s just not in the cards for me for some reason 😭 nothing humbles you like flossing.

When dentists say to use the C-curve method, how can we better floss the back of the teeth? I feel like I’m not getting it good enough behind my teeth.

Is gum aching normal with gum disease? Especially after flossing and brushing? And not like bad aching? Just slight oh hey that’s there kind of thing???

At what point with gum disease should you be nervous about your teeth shifting and talk to your dentist about gum grafts? I don’t think I’m there yet but I want to be prepared for the worst while hoping for the best.

What toothpaste and mouthwash do you suggest? Also, tongue scrapers??? Worth it? Or is the toothbrush back thing with the ridges good enough?

Lastly, very very strange thing happened last time I had to get my fillings. They gave me the numbing stuff (had to go to the very back) and my mouth got very watery because the flavor was pretty nice ngl 😭 but it got on that side of my tongue and then some accidentally went down my throat when I swallowed out of nervousness (it’s a bit of a tic for me.)

Then that side of my throat got numb and I think my body went into a bit of fight or flight because it felt like I couldn’t breathe ??? (I was on nitrous) it was just a few minutes but I had my Fitbit on and my heart rate was through the roof.

Obviously I’m fine now but it scared the shit out of me. And they left me in the room for ten minutes by myself to let the numbing stuff kick in so I thought the last thing I would ever see was Amanda Bynes in She’s The Man on the tv.

So warning to all, no matter how good that numbing stuff tastes, DO NOT SWALLOW IT .

Anyways, THANK YOU ❤️🫶🏾❤️

hey anon, amazing job going in for your first dental appointment in 5 years!!! that's so awesome and i'm really proud of you!!

lots of really good questions so i'm just gonna tackle them in order:

mild tenderness/inflammation of the gums is pretty common with active periodontal disease, especially in the first 6-12 months after treatment. and if you're having sensitivity on a tooth you recently had a filling done on, i would definitely recommend mentioning it to your dentist!! often times, they can make a few more adjustments to make sure your bite still meets cleanly.

a water flosser is a great investment!! i especially like to use mine with a 1:1 mix of water with mouthwash for a little extra boost of fluoride. using manual floss sometimes is still a good idea, though.

getting around the backside of the teeth is sooooo tricky, and the backside of the back molars is one of the most-missed spots in the whole mouth. this is a great video on the c-curve method that i think makes it a lot easier to understand and copy!!

that soreness you're feeling after brushing and flossing should go away over time as you build the habit and your tissue heals from the periodontal treatment. in the meantime, a warm saltwater rinse after flossing can give you some relief, especially if there's any bleeding.

if you're staying on top of your perio maintenance visits and homecare habits, you may never need more intervention!! it can depend on a lot of factors, but those are the top 2 ways to see perio disease really slow down its effects. your dentist will help advise you if/when you start to show signs of needing something like osseous surgery or gum grafting, as those indicators will generally show up on imaging before you'll notice symptoms at home. but, if you're concerned, please do bring it up at your next visit!! they will be much better able than i am to talk to you about those options in your case.

personally, i really like sensodyne sensitivity & gum and therabreath healthy gums !! and i absolutely love my tongue scraper. i feel like it gets so much more buildup than the grooves on the back of my toothbrush, and i feel much cleaner after using it. just make sure you replace it every 3 months, just like your toothbrush/brush head!!

that sounds scary and i'm glad you're okay!! it's true that the local anesthetics used in dental procedures can numb any tissue in your mouth. it generally doesn't last as long from external contact than when it's injected, so hopefully the numbness in your throat wore off quickly!! that sounds like a very uncomfortable and distressing experience, i'm sorry that happened.

thank you so much for being here, and i hope i was able to answer your questions :)

yes!! drinking a cup or so of water after eating or drinking something sugary/acidic has lots of benefits. it washes away a lot of the food particles that would otherwise stick to your teeth, dilutes the acidity/sugars, hydrates you, which in turn encourages saliva production, which helps prevent cavities in the long term. bonus points if you swish and spit with the first gulp. it's a great habit to build, especially if you have a sweet tooth like me!!

i don't personally have a ton of experience with specific otc mouthguards, but from what i can tell, the oral b one tends to be pretty well liked by professionals! the key is to get a hard guard, as a soft one will actually make your clenching worse. thickness is also an important factor; 3mm+ is considered "thick" and works best for severe clenching/grinding, while 1-2mm are considered "thin" and good for mild to moderate cases.

boil-and-bite guards have been the go-to for a while, but oral b and other brands have shifted to a microwave-and-bite model. essentially, the package comes with a sort of "blank" that you then microwave until it's softened, then bite into so it molds to your teeth. the custom fit of models like this will make sure it sits snugly and doesn't throw your bite out of alignment.

your dentist will of course recommend a professional lab-made guard, but it's worth asking if they would be willing to make adjustments to your otc guard if you get the impression slightly off, or retrofit it if you get any restorations done.

i hope you're able to get some relief from nighttime clenching!!

hi anon, please do not put soap in your mouth!! certain soaps might be safe, but most household soaps contain cleaning chemicals that should not be consumed. it's more likely to cause irritation to your soft tissues than do any good for your teeth.

in the absence of toothpaste, here are some safe alternatives:

baking soda (mix a paste with water at a 2:1 ratio)

mouthwash

saltwater (or just plain water!!)

of course toothpaste is ideal, but any of the above will work just fine in a pinch!!

Are they falling apart or is it tartar and I can stop worrying?

hi moonfrost, i of course can't diagnose anything from one photo over the internet, but i'll try to help as best i can. based on that picture, it does look like there's a layer of calculus (hardened plaque) across the back of your lower front teeth. it's super common to get buildup in that spot because it can be easy to miss it while brushing. i don't see any obvious chips on the teeth themselves, and if you're not feeling pain around the spot where that big sharp hole is, i would guess you're seeing pieces of calculus breaking off. especially if this has been going on for a few years; it's unlikely that you could break off that much natural tooth structure over that amount of time without feeling significant pain and/or the tooth completely breaking.

if you run your tongue over that area and it feels rough or fuzzy, it's probably calculus. healthy natural teeth should feel smooth to the touch. in fact, one of the most common things i hear from patients after getting periodontal treatment is that their teeth feel "slimy" now, because they've gotten used to that rough feeling.

being without insurance makes it difficult to get the care you need, but there are some resources that may help depending on your situation. the next time you have the spoons, i would highly recommend searching the following terms in your area to see what's available to you:

dental school accepting patients

sliding scale dentist

dental discount plan

dental insurance marketplace

donated dentistry

i hope this helps, and do me a favor and try to brush your teeth tonight? you got this!!

i don't mind giving up the mint, but giving up fluoride is more worrying, and googling "fluoride alternatives" is sending me down some, shall we say, less scientific paths.

at the end of the day if i have to choose between skin aesthetics and dental health, i'll prioritize teeth, but are there good fluoride alternatives for remineralization that don't include "sleeping with a crystal under your pillow"?

ask received 5/5

ok first and foremost hi from one snoopy lesbian to another!! i have my weighted snoopy on my lap as i'm typing this :)

so the other main ingredient that remineralizes enamel is nanohydroxyapatite, or nHA! it's a synthetic formulation of a naturally occuring mineral that acts similarly to fluoride in its effect on our teeth. it both remineralizes enamel and reduces sensitivity, so you'll see small amounts in most sensitive and whitening products. it was actually developed by NASA in the 70s as a response to astronauts experiencing bone loss while in space! scientists in japan started developing its use in toothpaste in the early 90s, and while it's still much less common than fluoride, there are a few good options on the market.

it's most effective at a 10% concentration and in combination with xylitol, which helps to stimulate saliva production as well as adding a hint of sweetness. a lot of toothpastes have nHA in a much lower concentration, which is fine in combination with fluoride, but on its own it's not going to do much for you under that 10% threshold. boka is a really popular brand of fluoride-free nHA toothpaste because it's available at drugstores, but they don't list the concentration anywhere, so it's probably quite a bit lower unfortunately.

dr jen, davids, and ollie are all brands with both a 10% concentration of nHA and xylitol, and dr jen has one with both of these and fluoride! i believe all three of these also come in non-mint flavors as well!

i hope this helps, and good luck with both your dental and skincare :)

but i still can't shake the fear that it's too late. i feel like with my negligence i've doomed myself to losing all my teeth as i get older no matter what... the saying goes that fillings eventually turn into root canals/crowns which turn into implants or dentures—and i'm terrified of getting a root canal and having my teeth shaved down for a crown... i'm even just terrified of getting fillings, because its inevitable that every time you have to replace them, more and more natural structure gets removed. the thought that no matter what i do now, ive surely doomed my teeth already due to youthful neglect and can only prolong the inevitable, is really saddening. do you think my concerns are founded? or am i being too negative?

ask received 1/23

anon, i am so glad to hear that you're building healthy homecare habits and that you have an appointment booked!! i'm sure by now you've already had the visit, and i hope it went well, but i'm still going to answer the rest of this ask because i think a lot of people need to hear it.

it is never too late.

it might feel that way when there's visible decay and buildup you can't scrape off. it might feel that way when finances are tight and you're overwhelmed with the restorative work. but i promise you from the bottom of my heart that it is never too late to turn things around.

you're right that a restored tooth is not as strong as a healthy natural tooth. but, at the same time, a restored tooth is much, much stronger than a natural tooth with active decay. a tooth that's been restored with a filling might need a crown or root canal someday, but it also might hold strong for a very long time; we have patients in my practice that have fillings in their mouth they got the 70s!

the lifespan of a restoration depends on a lot of factors, but the biggest one by far is homecare. the #1 reason a restoration needs to be replaced is recurrent caries, aka a cavity that forms around or underneath the restoration. remember that a filling or crown only treats the existing cavity; it doesn't prevent cavities from forming ever again in the same area. it's still important to brush and floss regularly to prevent decay.

now is a great time to start building up those habits you've been working on, so that once your teeth have been restored to a healthy state, you can rely on that routine to keep them in the best shape possible!!

i want to highlight too, though, that if a restoration needs to be replaced, it's nothing to beat yourself up over. as i said before, lots of factors go into a restoration's lifespan: genetic predisposition for cavities, the size and location of it, quality of work, your bite, your jaw positioning, all of that can affect whether you need restorations in the first place and whether they ever need to replaced. my dentist often recommends occlusal guards to anyone with more than a handful of restorations in their mouth, because it protects them (+ your natural teeth of course!) from a lot of wear and tear from grinding and clenching at night.

so, all this to say, please don't give up just as you're getting going!! your teeth and their shiny new restorations can serve you for years to come!!

ask received 1/14

thank you so much for sending this in!! i'm so glad to hear it's been working for you, and i hope this will be helpful to anyone who's been wondering if it might work for them too :)