I Don't Post Toads

At work today I mentioned to a coworker how, several times in my life, if I have made a mistake, or wasn't able to do something, other people's response has boiled down to "why didn't you do (insert thing)? Next time do this," with no real suggestions for how to do the thing or ideas for alternatives. And she just said that that's the way "the real world" works and we just have to get used to it.

Honestly she may as well have hit me over the head with a baseball bat. She is normally a very sweet and helpful person so her answer has been haunting me all day.

When did this become the norm? Why the fuck is "just do it" the solution we're given over and over and over again? Those three words have been so incredibly harmful for me for my entire life. I have ADHD. That fucking diagnosis includes executive dysfunction. Telling me to "just do it" is like telling me to deep sea dive without an oxygen tank. It does jack shit, and only ever makes me feel worse about myself than I did before. So many people have mental or physical health problems that make "just do it" a completely impossible solution. And when we can't "just do it" we're made to feel like we're lazy, or incompetent, or apathetic. Like the fact that we can't somehow means that we're either too uncaring or too incapable to do the thing.

We care!!! We care so fucking much!!!! We are not incapable or stupid!!!!! Our fucking brains and bodies are just different!!!! Stop! Making! People! Feel! Shitty! Just for being different!

Like seriously, how many people have convinced themselves that they are lesser or just straight up a horrible person because of this "just do it" bs? Something has got to fucking change, because it's no wonder our population's mental health is as bad as it is when this is the kind of attitude society has towards simple mistakes and anything short of perfection at all times. The only thing I think we should "just do" is pitch that stupid saying in the garbage where it belongs. Telling people that this is just the way things are and we need to accept it is unfathomable. Like...no. No way am I accepting that this is how things have to be when it hurts so many people.