TIYAS

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Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

I LOVE YOU

"Before her lies the shattered remnants of her family, and she is at a loss for how to reassemble them into a cohesive whole."

When Iduna married Agnarr, she knew being the Queen of Arendelle will bring forth a lot of hurdles in her way. Her, being a Northuldra, has never been a secret to her husband and Agnarr has helped her in every way possible to accommodate with the culture change, she has faced every challenge boldly, refusing to back down. But this is not one of them. Never in her life, has she prepared herself to watch her daughter like this. 

She watches helplessly, with tears threatening to fall from her eyes, as Elsa bangs her head with her fists, screams and tries to understand what is wrong with her. 

And they say god is merciful, Iduna thinks bitterly. 

As if having powers are not enough, fate has to take away her daughter’s hearing too. 

She doesn’t try to get too close to Elsa, not wanting to overwhelm her, but a trill of fear work through her body as she notices the bandages in Elsa’s hands start to freeze. 

Her power’s are manifesting. Again. 

Her gaze mets with the king’s. Cerulean blue locking with emerald green. There’s the same fear and worry on them. He’s seen the frost too. 

She watches as Agnarr breaks his focus from her and his eyes dart to Elsa’s hands. His mouth opens and closes many times, unable to form any word. If the situation was normal Iduna will have found it funny and teased him for it, but the situation is everything but normal. Her proud king husband who always has his words is suddenly speechless. 

Air squeezes out of her lungs. 

Before her lies the shattered remnants of her family, and she is at a loss for how to reassemble them into a cohesive whole.

Unwilling to watch this misery unfold any longer and afraid her daughter might harm herself with the powers again, Iduna walks towards the bed and takes Elsa’s hands in hers. If she notices the inhumanely cold temperature rolling off the princess’s hands and feels her own hands going numb against Elsa’s, she doesn’t say anything. 

Elsa frantically looks at Iduna, eyes as wide as saucers and tries to pry her hands away from her mother’s grasp. 

Iduna grips harder. 

She brings Elsa’s hands to her lips and kisses them softly, “hey, it’s okay, I’ve got you”. Despite being fully aware that Elsa can’t hear her, she still whispers sweet nothings. 

Elsa’s gaze lingers on her mother’s lips, unable to decipher what is being said, but seeing her mother’s soft smile, Elsa calms down. 

“Mama ?”, Iduna will have missed the whisper if she weren’t as close as she is. She sees as Elsa looks at her with red rimmed eyes, with so much hope as if her mother will tell her it is all a bad dream and she will be alright.  

Oh, what Iduna will give for all of this to be a bad dream.

Elsa is still looking at her. She is expected to answer. But, what will she say ? Is there anything she can say ? 

Iduna has never felt more useless in her life. 

She gently cups Elsa’s face and with a soft smile says, “You will be okay”.

Such a lie. Iduna loathes herself for lying to her daughter, but she doesn’t know what else to say rather than assure everything will be fine. 

Elsa’s eyebrows draw together and her forehead wrinkles, looking intently at her mother’s lips.

Iduna almost wants to slap herself for the stupidity. Of course, Elsa can’t hear her, she reminds herself bitterly. 

Agnarr seems to have understood this, cause few moments later he returns with a parchment paper, a quill and an ink pot. He hands the paper and quill to Iduna keeping the ink pot securely in his hands to avoid it from spilling over the sheets.

“You will be alright” Iduna writes with her dirty cursive. Even after over a decade of being queen her penmanship has ever improved. 

Elsa reads. 

“I….will….hear?” Elsa croaks.

Iduna realises she’s given the wrong impression. Of course, Elsa will not be alright, she has lost a freaking part of herself. 

Her hands shake, gliding over the parchment. 

‘Yes, and then I will sing you lullaby every night and talk to you every morning and everything will be back to normal’, Iduna so desperately wants to write that down. But, no. Elsa will never be able to listen to her lullaby and ask questions about them and never hear her talk. Nothing will ever be normal again.

She’s stopped singing lullabies to Elsa since she turned six and has displayed more interest in history books and politics rather than age old myths. Agnarr was the one who would tell her heroic tales of their ancestors and discuss the childish version of Arendelle’s politics. Iduna has acknowledged the fact that while Anna is like her, mischievous and expressive, Elsa and her father were cut from the same cloth. They would talk for hours on politics while Iduna will stare blankly at them, unable to decipher what they were talking about. This realisation has led to Iduna ceasing to read bedtime stories to Elsa or coming to tuck her, leaving that to Agnarr since Elsa seemed to like his company more than her, anyway. And, she has never regretted that decision more. She’ll give anything to enable Elsa to be able to listen to her again. She’ll keep on talking to Elsa for hours and hours about anything and everything even if it doesn’t make any sense. She just wants Elsa to listen. 

She shakes her head at Elsa and writes, “No, I’m sorry”.

She doesn’t remember who starts crying first but somehow she finds herself almost tackled to the ground as Elsa jumps to hug her. 

She holds her daughter, as tight as she can, promising to never let her go. 

After what seems like an eternity, Elsa detaches herself  from Iduna, hurriedly, as realisation dawns on her, the events of the night coming back. She looks at her mother, “Anna ?” She searches the room for her sister, and horror washes over her as she realises, Anna isn’t there. “Is she-” She bites her lips, unable to finish the sentence. 

Iduna catches between the lines and wonders how much a girl needs to love her sister to forget about the hearing she lost hours ago and worry about her sister.  

“She’s okay. Only sleeping,” Elsa reads the parchment and nods, a smile gracing her lips.

Leave it to Anna to make Elsa smile, Iduna thinks.

Iduna bites her lips and writes the question that has been burning in her mind for so long. “How did it happen ?”

Elsa reads and shakes her read. She doesn’t know. 

Agnarr sits beside Iduna, the mattress dramatically dipping under his weight. He takes the parchment. “What do you last remember ?”

Elsa thinks. She remembers waiting for her parents, for Anna and then…….the voices. 

“They said I’m a monster” 

Iduna frowns, and writes again. “What ?”

Elsa realises the words have not come out as she has intended to. Agnarr and Iduna soon realises that too and reluctantly hands Elsa the parchment. 

Elsa dips the quill in the ink, with two fingers holding the quill and her pinky struck up. Perfect manners, just like Agnarr. Even at such a young age, Elsa’s handwriting is better than Iduna’s.

Iduna’s heart breaks as she reads the sentence written in beautiful cursive, “They said I’m a monster. I asked them to stop, they didn’t listen” 

A single tear runs down Iduna’s cheek. It doesn’t  take a lot of guesses to figure who ‘they’ are. She looks at Agnarr, his eyes has become watery. He has come to the same conclusion too.

Iduna can almost see the tragedy unfold. Her daughter blaming herself for hurting Anna, desperately asking for the voices in her head to stop calling her vile names. Elsa clasping her hands over her ears. Her daughter has gone through this alone, has hurt herself just because of their carelessness. 

Iduna has never felt more like a failure.

She holds Elsa’s chin between her thumb and pointer finger, and lifts it so she’s looking straight into her eyes. It is the same cerulean blue as Iduna’s. 

Speaking as slowly as possible, with mouth opening wide, she says, “I. Love. You”.

Elsa understands what is being said, or Iduna guesses she does cause the next moment Elsa’s face brightens and she gives a watery smile, nodding.

 Elsa tries to remember how the words sounded and felt in her tongue and with great effort says back, “I love you more”. 

Elsa hopes it comes out as intended, and reckons it does when Iduna pulls her into a desperate hug. 

Everything is still silent. A palpable silence, like someone has draped a blanket of silence over her. Warm and comforting. 

honestly I am not really surprised I got Elsa. My friends often compare me with her, because of my habit to isolate myself and overanalysing situations too much. But, if I’m honest I can be an Anna too, something only my best friend have noticed. I’m very clumsy, I ramble like Anna to people who are close to me (rn it’s only 4 people, one of them being my bff), I am a romantic in heart and fall for every guy I see (except I tell that only to my bff) and I can be fiercely protective of people I care about even tho I’m extremely emotionally detached (like Elsa). 

And I am a goof. (which is funny cause my classmates used to avoid me cause apparently I am very intimidating but now they’re like - “you're just a rabbit behind that all-mighty font”. And idk which is worse lol)

Chapter 3

I CAN’t HEAR YOU

"The sound of wailing and suffering echoes through the room but she doesn’t hear anything."

There are both dreams and nightmares. Elsa watches the dreams with a fond feeling that leaves her nostalgic. One by one, they slit past her eyes like feathers under her nose, and she finds herself smiling every time a particularly loving memory with Anna is played. The smile fades, however, when she sees herself being started down by her father, her mother shielding Anna from her, and she feels her hands shackled. 

Even in her dreams, she’s dangerous. 

Elsa can feel the tears start to form in her eyes, when she watches a nine inch long icicle protrudes from Anna’s stomach. She’s stuck her sister. Again. 

No, she’s killed her. 

Elsa turns and meets her mother’s eyes, she is looking at her with such detest that Elsa can almost feel her heart shattering. 

She dares to look at her father. His face is neutral, devoid of any feelings. “Take that monster to the dungeon”, he announces. 

Elsa’s heart drops to the earth’s core. “I’m sorry, Papa”, she hears herself plead. “I didn’t mean it, I didn’t mean to kill Anna”

“Take her to the dungeon, this instant”, he repeats. 

Elsa’s vision turns blurry and she can no longer see over her tears. 

Suddenly the scenery changes and she finds herself coddled in her mother’s embrace. 

She smiles. 

“We love you Elsa” her mothers says with so much conviction, Elsa wants to believe her instantly.

If only she didn’t know better.

“Do you think I’m a monster, Mama ?” 

Iduna frowns, “Why would you think that, Elsa ? You’re the kindest girl I’ve met”

Elsa feels her heartbeat picking up in excitement as her mother traces her nose with her pinky. She lets out a small giggle. 

But then, suddenly a sense of despair falls over Elsa, “But I hurt Anna”, she whispers. 

“That was an accident, Elsa”

“What if she hates me ?”, Elsa murmurs, fidgeting with her fingers. 

“I love you, Elsa” 

Elsa abruptly stands. She blinks in shock. She can swear it was Anna’s voice. 

Suddenly she finds herself surrounded by Anna and her parents. 

Her father puts his hand on her shoulder in a violent motion and shakes her hard, “Hear me, Elsa. Can you hear me ?”. His voice comes in an urgent tone, “You have to hear me, Elsa”

Her mother is beside him the next moment, her voice soft,  “Listen to me, Elsa. I need you to listen to me. Please”

Elsa stares blankly. Why are they asking her if she can hear them ? Of course she can .

Anna comes next. 

Except Elsa can’t hear what Anna says. She sees Anna’s mouth moving, can feel that Anna is saying her something, but for heaven’s sake, she just can’t hear what.

She tries to strain her ears. 

Still no sound.

She breaths heavily and tries to hug Anna, but before she can move she finds her body……..gone. It is dark. Everything is gone.

She still can’t hear anything and gets the impression that the dream’s coming to an end. Things continue on in a dizzying haze, but nothing can stop the sudden burning in her hands or the tiny pain that is pulsing in her head.  

A soothing hand runs through her scalp, messaging around where it hurt and bringing Elsa back to earth. She slowly opens her eyes. Pain, real, physical pain. So much pain. More than she has ever felt before. Elsa momentarily wonders if opening her eyes has ever been this much painful.

For several seconds, she sees nothing. Then slowly, lines appear, defining everything. Blue walls, snowflake patterns - she is in her room.

She flexes her left hand and feels her fingers move against the sheets. She tries to push herself up, but hisses and falls back when pain shots up her hands. 

Suddenly her mother and father appears in her field of vision. Their faces are filled with worry. 

“Mama” she whispers. 

No sound comes out, she supposes her throat is very dry.

Her parents doesn’t say anything. Her father moves forward and helps her up. 

Now that she is in a much comfortable position. She checks herself over. 

Her hands are bandaged. Why ? Her head hurt. She  moves her hands to her head, finds her blond hair tied in several knots, which will probably take her mother forever to get rid of. Slowly she lowers her hand but something- something in her ear, causes her to stop. She pulls the cotton plugs from her ear, and holds them before her eyes.

It comes off bloody. 

She looks at her parents with a puzzled expression. 

“What happened ?”

Her parents doesn’t answer. 

“Papa ?”. She’d afraid now.

Still no answer.

Why can't they just freaking answer her ?

“Mama ? Why are you silent ?”

And then she notices something weird. Her parents’ lips are moving. Belatedly, she realises she can’t hear herself either. She clears her throat, feels the vibration of her vocal cords. But the world remains silent. 

Her mother tentatively sits beside her, but Elsa doesn’t hear the bed creaking. Her father walks closer and though she can see the medals dandling over his chest, she doesn’t hear them. Doesn’t hear what her mother is saying even though her lips are moving, doesn’t hear her father’s strong footsteps. 

It’s like the world has gone silent. 

Or she’s gone……..deaf.

Horror takes over Elsa’s senses as she tries to make sense of the situation. Tears escape her eyes followed by her hands clasping over her ears.

The sound of wailing and suffering echoes through the room but she doesn’t hear anything.

She takes hold of her neck with both hands, feels her throat vibrating and squeezes them. She chokes until a hand pries away Elsa’s fingers from her neck. 

Someone- her mother, tries to hug her. Elsa doesn’t look at her, doesn’t let her touch her as she pushes her mother aside and backs away. 

Her head bangs against the bed post. She fells the pain, but never hears the bang.

What is happening to her ?

She looks at her father for answer. Her vision is blurry, it is difficult for her to see clearly. But, she watches his bottom lip quiver and his shoulder, which has always been straight with confidence, is dropped in resignation. 

And, then Elsa knows. 

Complete hopelessness converted into tears rain down her face at lightning speed.

Chapter 2

A King’s Value

"They say a King’s life values above all, but Agnarr knows better, for he will trade his life any day for his daughters."

When King Agnarr of Arendelle returns back from the troll valley with his wife by his side and sleeping daughter cradled in his arms, he doesn’t expect the relief of his younger daughter being safe to be so short lived.

Looking back, he can’t remember the specifics, but he does remember demanding someone to explain the unexpected commotion going on in his castle. Kai tells him something, words coming out of his mouth so fast that the king struggles to keep up but one specific word, “Elsa” and Agnarr suddenly doesn’t care and he’s clumsily running towards the princess’s bedroom, stumbling an embarrassingly high number of times for an ever steadfast king. 

Sleep. That’s all he has wanted after the tiresome events of the night. He is both physically and emotionally exhausted, but even then, he will willingly run all the way to the north mountain and back over seeing his oldest daughter, fragile and weak and shaking, crouched down on the floor across Gerda, any day.

Everything else goes into a blur and Agnarr’s attention zeroes only to his daughter. 

He is a king. Totally unused to feeling helpless, and he sure as hell wasn’t ready to face deathly situations twice in a span of few hours. One unconscious daughter was enough, why does fate have to add the uninjured one into the mix too ?

He walks towards Elsa in just a few long strides and whatever kingly resolve he has mustered crumbles when she calls for him, choking over her sobs. 

He kneels and cradles his daughter’s small frame in his arms. He gently tilts Elsa’s head and watches with horror as blood drips from her ears in tracks of thin veins. 

For the first time in his life, the king doesn’t know what to do, and feels a blanket of helplessness descend over him. 

Tears are stinging his eyes. He doesn’t let them fall. 

“You’re gonna be fine, Elsa” He murmurs, though it was more for his own benefit than her, snuggling the princess’s body closer to him. 

“Call for the physician” He orders, his voice losing it’s royal steadiness and rather fills with a father’s desperation. 

What is he supposed to do ? Will the trolls help ? No, Elsa is bleeding not stuck but magic, a physician will do. Isn’t he the king ? Shouldn’t he know how to handle situations like this ? 

The truth is, as a king he knows exactly what to do, but as a father, his years of royal training to be calm and steady minded has gone down the drain and suddenly he’s at loss. 

He completely misses Iduna joining them beside him, but the next moment, when Elsa's eyes slide shut, and her body goes limp, he is instantly hyper-aware of everything as he goes cold, his heart skipping a beat, and he's shaking Elsa, calling for her, but she's not moving a muscle.

The next hours are like a blur, everything seems so distant. He doesn’t remember when Iduna takes Elsa from his arms, doesn’t remember when the royal physician comes and checks Elsa over. 

He is still kneeled on the ground in shock.

“….. has ruptured her ear drums”

Wait. What ? 

The king's instantly on his feet, and that's when he notices Iduna running her hand through Elsa's blond locks while her other is covering her mouth, tears brimming her eyes.

“Wha-What ?” Agnarr fells like screaming cause everything about this situation is so wrong. 

“There’s ice in her ears, Majesty” the physician shakes his head, “Her powers have struck her in the ears and tore her ear drums.”

“What does that mean for her ?” Though Agnarr knew  exactly what it means, he had to painstakingly study biology when he was younger and clearly remembers the uses of eardrums. He just doesn’t want to believe it. 

“She won’t be able to hear ever again, Majesties” The physician admits softly. 

Agnarr feels lightheaded. He does not react when the physician asks for his permission to leave, nor does he stand beside his wife and comfort her when she starts crying.

This isn’t a kingdom affair or a situation whose answers are written in the yellow pages of thousand years old books in his library. This is beyond his reach and the amount of frustration and despair he feels is almost shattering.

They say a King’s life values above all, but Agnarr knows better, for he will trade his life any day for his daughters. 

He squeezes his eyes shut and leans down to gently kiss on Elsa’s forehead, gripping her bandaged hands. 

Wait….what ? …….Bandaged ?

Carefully cradling Elsa’s small hand in his, Agnarr unwraps the loose cloth over them and shifts himself a little so as to not block the light from the hearth. 

“Heaven help us !” Iduna’s voice breaks the silence in the room. A single tear tickles down Agnarr’s cheek, his chin trembling. He chews on his lower lip and looks away as his face turns red. 

Elsa’s palm is raw with angry red cracks and blisters between the creases of her fingers.  The cracks have slightly spread to the back of her hands. Small chunks of blood are frozen in place, the abrasions covered in crimson frost. Some of it has been cleaned, probably by the physician, but mostly the ice is still there, frozen and painful. 

Somehow between the uproar, both the parents have missed to check on the other injuries Elsa might have suffered. But, now when things are a little calmer they finally notices her bloodied hands, and a slight scratch on her left cheek, probably gotten from an ice fractal grazing her skin. From, the corner of his eyes, Agnarr watches as Iduna checks Elsa over properly and lets out a relieved sigh when she doesn’t find any other injury. 

-----------------

How has things gotten this wrong ?  

Suddenly, Agnarr feels anger bubble inside him like molten lava. Anger over that blasted ancestor of his, who’s crime has led to God cursing his innocent daughter. He hears Iduna sniffle, but he doesn’t move to comfort her, doesn’t look at her. 

Red mist fills his vision.

Agnarr isn’t naive enough to believe Iduna’s Northuldra bloodline has nothing to do with this power. They, after all, are the ones who interacted with magic. And then he’s, all of a sudden, livid towards her. 

-----------------

Slender hands cups his face, wipes his cheek, and almost instantaneously Agnarr is looking at Iduna. 

He doesn’t want to. No, no. 

But Iduna’s surprisingly strong grip forces him to look directly into her eyes.   

He wants to be angry at her. Furious. Her damned bloodline has led to this. She has led to this. Iduna was the reason Anna has been harmed today, was the reason behind Elsa’s powers, Elsa’s lack of hearing. His wife….she was the reason….for…..for their happy family. She is the woman he’s fallen in love with, the one who’s left her tribe to save him that tragic day. His wife is the one who has given him such beautiful daughters. 

Agnarr feels his resolution collapse and before he can stop himself he pulls her to him, desperate to draw comfort from his wife. “I’m sorry….” He apologises, squeezing her tighter “I’m sorry…..I love you….my god…..I love you so much”

Iduna gets thoroughly confused, but a determination to comfort his husband in his time of need like he has done, so many times before,  sets in. 

“We’ll get through this”, She whispers. “Anna is fine. Elsa will be fine, we’ll help her. We’ll be alright”

It is the first time she has to assure him of that. It is always Agnarr who comforts them, promises everything will be fine. But, how can he say everything will be fine, when everything is so, so wrong.

Deep emotions stir with no other outlet but through the tears he has forced back for so long. Moans escape his lips through the suppressed sound of hiccups. 

Sitting on the huge bed beside Elsa, both rulers break down.

-----------------------

Before long, Iduna slips into a restless slumber and Agnarr lays the mother beside the daughter, and moves back to lean against the head rest. 

He runs his fingers through Iduna and Elsa’s hairs and traces their features with his thumb. A swell of pride surges through him and an inappreciable smile pulls in his lips as he figures that while Elsa has her mother’s eyes, the rest of her features are her father’s. 

He rests his head against the head rest, staring at the ceiling. Millions of thoughts crosses his mind. What would happen to the kingdom ? He knows everyone will be reluctant to accept Elsa as their future queen now. Then he has to think about her powers. His heart breaks all over again as he realises Elsa will have to figure out her lack of hearing on her own. 

He doesn’t let his mind wander anymore. Putting all thoughts aside he focuses only on the three most important persons in his life. He takes reassurance from the steady rice and fall of his wife’s chest, the ever present soft smile on Elsa’s face, and the knowledge that Anna is alive and sleeping. 

For the first time in that night he doesn’t feel like screaming anymore. 

There will be many more struggles along the way and they’ll be stumbling like blind fools, but as long as his family is together they’ll always find the light at the end of the dark tunnel. 

Agnarr sighs, and sinks against the pillows while his fingers continue to twist a strand of Iduna’s hair. 

Everything will change from now. And he sure as hell will be ready for it. 

I have dreamt of studying among the best colleges in my country but last year even though I got into a pretty good one yet I was not satisfied.

So, went against my family and dropped out of college. All everyone said was - "Why would you take such a huge risk in your life ?" / "What if you do worse this time ?" / "What if you don't get it this time too ?"

Well, it certainly doesn't seem a risk now when I am inches away from 'getting' it.

I just have one more exam (JEE Advanced which is considered one of the toughest exam in the world, and I am wholly unprepared for it). If I manage to get a rank under 5k, then - well idk I've not planned after, all I know is, I HAVE to nail that exam.

Cause ?

I've dreamt of this since I was in 16 (11th grade)