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@tingzhao
intro // google doc // self paras // musings // class schedule

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teflonsosâ:
â RICKY NODS HIS HEAD, knowing that ultimately this is a decision that ting has to make for herself and no one else can do that for her. â i guess that makes sense, though i donât think thereâs any point in doing things if you donât enjoy them, no matter how good at them you are. that just doesnât really sound like a fun way to live life, â ricky points out, because thatâs usually where his head is at â life is short, and it should be spend with people you love, doing things that you enjoy. â exactly. who knows ? maybe youâll discover that youâre an amazing dancer AND you enjoy it, â he adds, taking her other hand when they get closer to the dance floor. â i did those lessons on valentineâs day, but i totally forgot everything they said, so we gotta do our own thing. âÂ
âi know i enjoy fighting, though i am still not entirely sure why,â ting says thoughtfully, mostly because sheâs still trying to piece together her own thoughts about it. as much as she thinks she could learn a lot if she stays, truly, she knows her heart isnât in it. sheâd risen to the occasion when sheâd had to, but that doesnât mean she ever wants to do it again. âdo you think so? i am quite graceful but i do not know if that means i have any sort of rhythm.â she grins when both of his hands are in hers, turning to walk backwards to pull him a little more to the center so she doesnât feel on display. âokay. what sort of dancing are you thinking?â
ingridsongâ:
âespecially if i ever wanna grill a weenie over an open flame.â the amount of glitter she would ingest if she did thatâŚÂ âsome drinks are both. youâve tried yuanyang before, right? do you like it?!â ingrid knows itâs popular in china and she can see why, sheâs definitely a fan. âthatâs exactly true! and maybe while youâre somewhere else youâll figure out what you wanna do and get inspired or something.â
âthat is very situational and you would be the only one prepared, and i love that for you.â ting can absolutely imagine ingrid actually doing that too. âyes, my mom loves it, i do not mind it when i have some of hers.â she just also doesnât usually crave caffeine which is for the best, sheâs energetic enough on her own. âi found it a bit intimidating how i feel like i have no direction at first, but i think it is actually a bit exciting. there are so many things in the world to do.â
harperkentâ:
A baby, Harper thought to herself as she looked at Ting. Left lucky to not have to experience what happened last year, though, she did hear that this school year was also terrible. Maybe the problem was just Gallagher in general. At the otherâs question, she was redy to say no and tell her that she hated it. That Gallagher has made her cry more than Georgetown, that she missed calling her dad, and kinda sorta missed her ex-boyfriend. But she doesnât, instead Harper smiled gently as she answered, âSome days I did. I had my friends at my side and met a few people here. It was⌠okay.âÂ
ting thinks that sounds a bit like her own experience, and she nods in understanding. âi think that is how i would sum up my first year as well.â worth it for her friends, not really much of anything else. âi am likely not returning next year, but i can not say i fully regret coming here in the first place.â
teflonsosâ:
â âYOUâRE CONSIDERING COMING BACK?â RICKY ASKS, because last time they talked she had seemed pretty certain that she didnât want to, or at least like it was the best idea for her. â what changed your mind ? â he might throw a cupcake if itâs because of this carmichael guy, but what the hell. he nods his head at her, ricky would never be angry at someone for being honest with him â iâve said many times thatâs what he values most about people, perhaps after going through life in a house full of his fatherâs deceptions. and thatâs probably why this isnât the field for him, because heâs so up front about everything. â of course i will, â he says, taking her hand, â but i must warn youâŚmy moves are fire. âÂ
âa lot of things.â her friendships, her lack of direction otherwise, but as much as ting thinks sheâs considering returning, she knows deep down sheâs already made up her mind about leaving. itâs just scary being so uncertain about her life. âmostly the fact that i do not think i know anything about myself or what i want or about the world in general so maybe i should stick with something i am at least good at.â please ting was worried about the content of the honesty, not the honesty itself. âthat is intimidating,â she teases lightly, but also she kind of means it. âi do not really dance, but i figure if this is our last gala, i should step out of my comfort zone a little bit.â

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alisnmoonâ:
âYou donât think so?â He asked her, hands reaching for the side of his cape. âI think this adds to my sinister vibes. Donât you think?â He felt like some extra as fuck villain. âI can understand why, it really fits you.â He almost said that she looks very pretty in it but Carmichael didnât know how to talk to girls and the words got caught in his throat.Â
âif sinister is the vibe you would like to go for, then yes, you are doing a great job at it.â but overall? ting doesnât find there to be anything sinister about carmichael, but itâs never as deep as ting takes things. âoh thank you.â her smile is bright. âare you glad it is the end of the year?â she is, very much so.
ofbrightsmilesâ:
âExactly. You get used to it, sure. But it will never be a normal lifeâ Azi said, shaking her head. Even though she would mostly be behind the keyboard, it was still not a life that most people had. It was exciting and scary all at the same time. âMe neither. Just live life and have funâ
âi suppose everyone has a different definition of normal though, actually,â ting points out, just because now sheâs thinking about it. âwell i am not an expert on theology but christianity is where the concept of sin comes from, right? my parents are buddhists.âÂ
martinawâ:
All the breath left Martinaâs lungs both from Tingâs reaction and the warm hug that Ting enveloped her in. She was accustomed to this feeling around Ting, like releasing a long sigh thatâs held in way too long. âHated you?â Martina laughed, sweet now that the tension dissipated. âFirst of all, I donât hate anyone!â She will not fact check <3. âSecond, and most important, I love you.â Her arms latched to tighten around Tingâs waist, also not caring about their outfits. âSorry, for scaring you. I canât believe you thought Iâd ââ she laughed again, nose scrunching, eyes sparkling and it wasnât just from the stars. In a way, her roommate was an incentive to leave â yes, she forgave Ting for what happened with the double agents. Rather, she did not trust that Gallagher was the best environment to cultivate their relationship. Fear rooted in her mind from being on opposing sides with Ting, and, if they stayed, who could guarantee that it wouldnât happen again? âTo clarify, weâll stay together or go together?â Martina concentrated on Ting, haloed by the glow of the gala behind her. It made it easier to step forward knowing Ting will not be far behind. âDo you want to be a spy?â Asking Ting this question was as close to asking herself, as if Ting could hold the answer for the both of them.
âyes, i know it is silly, but i am still not convinced that i have earned anyoneâs forgiveness.â but ting is still grinning, almost giddy (definitely giddy) in her relief. âi love you dearly. i am so glad i came here if it means i gained your friendship.â no matter whatâs happened this year, people like martina have made it worth it, and thatâs really the only motivation she would have to stay. but with no ricky and no martina, itâs hard to see enough motivation to stay. ingrid is a huge motivation, of course, but ingrid has also already encouraged ting to pursue her passions, so thatâs more where sheâs leaning. âyes. here together or not here at all.â sheâs thrilled that martina might not have to stay, and she looks out at the garden theyâre overlooking, considering the question. âi do not know what i want in general, but i am pretty sure it is not being a spy. to be completely honest, i am not sure i even really know who i am.â she knows every name of every child her parents attempted to have before she was born, has spent her entire life trying to fulfill all of their destinies without considering what she might want her own to be. âi think it is best if i step away from gallagher and try to figure it out, decide what will make me happiest.â
skylarsfmâ:
âthank you, youâre the sweetest. and no, no dates, but maybe i want to look nice before i say goodbye to someone.âÂ
ting canât help it, sheâs curious. âthere are a lot of people leaving to say goodbye to, anyone in particular?â
ofbrightsmilesâ:
âI have no idea how I will be able to get used to a normal life after all my years being a student at Gallagherâ Azi said and shrugged. âI think everyone has a different interpetition of what is a saint or a sinnerâ
âi suppose it will not be a very normal life if you are planning to pursue espionage,â ting points out with a smile. sheâs not even sure what qualifies as a normal life, anyway. âi do not really believe in the concept of sin, anyway.â

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alisnmoonâ:
He nodded his head as well. âThatâs... thatâs fair.â Made sense. If he wanted to be her friend and as himself, he had to earn the spot again. Start all over as if they were strangers. âWell, what do you want to know? I can tell you a few things, likeââ The bat shifted from hand to hand as the gears in his brain began to turn. âI love skateboarding. I saw some kids in our neighborhood on theirs and I wanted to do the same. Allister tried to learn with me but gave up because it was too hard.â It explained why he couldnât walk around with his skateboards or show off the many tricks that he could do. âIf I had my board on me, I would show you. Iâm like a pro.âÂ
she isnât trying to be harsh, and obviously she still cares about him, but ting thinks itâs important to get to know him independently from the person heâs spent the year pretending to be. âskateboarding!â she doesnât think she ever wouldâve guessed. âi do not suppose anyone has a board you can borrow?â sheâs curious now, and sheâs fairly certain sheâs seen people skateboarding here before. âwhat is your favorite time of day? when do you feel the best, during the day or night?â
alisnmoonâ:
âSinner, obviously.â He didnât feel saint like at all to do the other option. He smiled at her as well, hand brushing over the top of his head. âThanks, you look amazing. Sinner?â
âmaybe it is not obvious,â she says just to be difficult, but also because she doesnât think carmichael is a sinner, obviously. âsupposedly, but mostly i just liked this dress.â
ingridsongâ:
âthank god,â she says, placing a hand over her heart. âiâm sure thatâll come in handy!â perhaps ingrid will carry one around just for fun, though admittedly it seems like the kind of thing that would get glitter everywhere. âi can fix that,â she says seriously, oddly determined. âkorean coffee is so good!â and sweet. âwhat about australia, mate?! you can see the great barrier reef and stuff.â
âi am sure too!â ting says, mostly joking, but sheâs sure ingrid is joking as well. unless the other girl thinks she should start carrying around a pitchfork and she canât really say sheâs fully opposed to the idea in the concept of spy school. âplease do! i like it in desserts, i have just always preferred tea for drinking.â itâs part of her nightly routine. âthere are so many options i do not even know where to start.â
teflonsosâ:
â âTRUEEEEEE,â RICKY DRAWS OUT THE WORD FOR A WHILE. â and what are they gonna do to you anyways ? expel you ? â he throws out his arms dramatically. it might be funny if they did, but also, itâs interesting how ting was so worried about the rules at the beginning of the year and now sheâs the biggest rebel of them all. he loves this for her. â i guess you could have never told me, butâŚi like knowing. not because i feel like you owe me, but because i want you to know you can talk to me about stuff. that must have been a hard decision. âÂ
âwell, they could if i decide to come back next year, which i am considering. but i would find it quite hypocritical.â sutton had known all along, ting hadnât, and sheâd had no choice but to wonder if what had happened on that tape could happen to cecilia or carmichael. still, she feels a bit like sheâs received more grace than she deserves lately, both from ricky and martina, but she wonât question it. âdeciding to do what i did was a bit of a hard choice, but deciding to tell you about it was not. no matter how worried i was that you would be upset, i always want to be honest with you.â she holds her hand out to him, an unnecessary peace offering. âwill you dance with me?â
jjamppongâ:
            â yes but you will get post beyonce sadness so be aware of that . â  she kept her expression serious as she had to continue the bit ,  â what i did last time , is i sulked in bed for like a week and a half just re-watching the footage i took that night . we can watch them together , strength in numbers . â
âokay, noted, i will start mentally preparing myself for that now.â ting is taking this seriously, not because she thinks kiki is serious, but because she is an emotional person and even a joke is likely to be true. âdoes that mean you will be returning next year?â

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ingridsongâ:
âas you should!â sadly it doesnât really go with tonightâs lewk, but ingrid is usually one for a nice glittery inner eye and shadow. sheâs probably wearing a little as highlight tonight but thatâs it. ingrid also never informed ting that they were racing, a decision she made silently and independently, mostly so she could tell herself she won! âi would eat tiramisu every day of my life. ooh, yeah, like fiji!â
âi will keep it in mind the next time i need to dress as a sinner.â ting canât imagine that need ever popping up again, but maybe for halloween next year if sheâs still in the states. ting is competitive, but happy to lose to ingrid any day. âit is quite nice, even if i do not care for coffee much.â she likes it in desserts though. âyes, exactly! anywhere with a beach would be nice, within reason.â
ingridsongâ:
âyou could spray paint it red and cover it in glitter,â she answers immediately, as if sheâs thought about this already, which she has not. i like that ting didnât expect ingrid to grab her some cookies too. sadly, ingrid takes this as an excuse to race and beats ting to the door, immediately swinging it open. âyou should take a gap year and go to italy or somewhere fun!â
âi do like glitter, that is a fun idea.â clearly a missed opportunity but there isnât anything she can do about it now. she didnât expect the cookies in general and would feel bad asking for some because of course she would. ingrid is too fast for ting whoâs still not the best at navigating heels but she giggles when she reaches the door. âitaly would be nice. somewhere tropical would be cool too.â