Cinnamon Toast Cunt

*sees dog* nice *sees dog wearing a bandana around its neck* nice

im so ugly can i have a refund

A lot of adulthood is shouting “AUGH MY LAUNDRY” hours after you put it in the washer/dryer and running to go fetch it

oh shit my laundry

reblog to save someone’s laundry

can i get uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh held

name a more iconic duo than me and procrastination. go ahead, i’ll wait. 

of course you will

i went to this guys house this weekend and slept on his couch n woke up to this cat standing on my tummy and i said “aww i didnt know you had a cat” and he said “yeah her names bev” then he paused and said “short for beverage”

assassination: a nation that is sassy

Date someone who will date you

Need me a freak like that

and everytime we kiss i swear i could fly

There would have been a lot less death in the wild west if they had just built the towns big enough