It’s true that your best days are ahead of you and it’s also true that before you know it, your worst days are behind you

Called you my home and then deserted you. Have no one to blame but myself. Wish I had it in me to love you unconditionally.

How do I contain it when my pain and hurt won’t stop spilling out. Please make this stop.

I love with my whole heart. I don’t know how to let go or to stop trying or to let fate do its thing, until disrespect knocks at my door. Till then, I’ll linger near your door - hoping you’d let me in again.

I go out. I do things alone. I feel confident. But before I know, I have tears in my eyes. I am in a cafe surrounded by people. Don't cry. How can I be sure and confident one second, and second-guess everything the next? Grief isn't linear. Healing isn't linear. I get older - that's linear. But it doesn't feel like I am getting any wiser.

Which thoughts of the day do I trust? The morning ones - telling me I'll be okay? The afternoon ones - telling me I had to do what I had to do. The night ones - telling me I have made a mistake and I should go back?

Choosing myself and letting go of the other person is a brave thing to do, but it’s a lonely journey from here on.

I'll not forget how much I cried the night I realized I liked you. I spent one hour crying, and the next hour singing songs for you on my guitar. You were on the call, sleeping. I cried because I was scared. I was scared of what these feelings meant. How was I to manage them? I woke you up and said I like you too. Tonight, I am crying because I really really like you, and I never thought I could feel this way for someone. I am crying because I am happy. I am crying because there is a change in me. I am crying because I don't know how else to express what I am feeling. For the first time, I am not thinking about how much the other person likes me back. I am selfless in my feelings. Oh, how much I yearned for this day.