husbandos

Yeah, you were completely wrong. On your wedding night, Kurt completely rip your clothes off your body. The way he licks his lips and stare at you, he wasn't a gentleman. He was a beast ready to let loose on you. He had you in so many positions. Missionary, mating press, your face in a pillow as his weight is on your back and holding the sheet so tight. His tongue is down your throat as his cum is sinking into your womb. When you guys come down from your high, he couldn't help but laugh at you and tell you, "I found you to be completely beautiful and sexy baby the moment my eyes landed on you. I just wanted to be a gentleman for you."

Maximus: I have an idea.

Lucy: ...

Cooper: ...

Maximus: What?

Lucy: Sweetie, don't take this the wrong way, but your ideas are often a little ... less-than-stellar.

Maximus: What's that mean?

Lucy: W-well, to put it politely, it means—

Astarion: *leans his head back and rolls his eyes, letting out a big satisfied breath* God's.. That was DEVINE...Thank you.

Tav: *Dead*

Astarion: ...Hey? *taps them*

Tav: *Dead*

Astarion: Don't play *starting to panic* Oi! *taps them harder*

Tav: *dead*

Astarion: ...Oh fuck...Oh shit...Oh no...

(2 minutes later)

Astarion: *crawls into Gales tent and kneels next to him* Pssst. Gale?

Gale: *half asleep* ...Oh?...Hello?..What is it?

Astarion: Yes, hello, listen..I've killed Tav by accident and-

Gale: You WHAT?!

Astarion: Shhhh, not so loud, can you use your magic to revive them?

Gale: *wide eyed* What the fuck is going on? What do you mean you killed them?

Astarion: Well, they let me drink their blood and I got a little carried away, oh I'm vampire by the way, heh, anyway so-

Gale: You're a WHAT?!

Astarion: Shhh, Gale! *frowns* Stop causing a scene, it's the middle of the night, people are sleeping, goodness me.

Gale: *horrified half asleep confusion*

This was the first set I had been on that featured three directors, and hopefully the last. One director was there to primarily film the sex scenes, which he did effectively and economically. The other two directors handled what is called in porn-lingo ‘B-Roll’, i.e. everything non sexual. Which on this film was substantial. The plot for To The Last Man involves two ranches populated entirely by horny men who have random sex and feud over water, as they are in the middle of a crippling drought. Which is why we filmed in Arizona during thunderstorm season…

It’s amazing no one got killed, or seriously injured. There was horse riding, there were fight scenes of rocky escarpments, there were drownings. When the real guns and live ammunition came out for a scene I thought, “That’s it, I’m going back to the truck”.

LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOO!!!

can i have Eyelander being the "safe driver" for demo

i mean someone accidentally bumping on the car and then he's just yelling out of window that he'll cut off the poor guy's head and then calls police

like y'know. mean sword on drive

dude you really just nailed it

can i have Eyelander being the "safe driver" for demo

i mean someone accidentally bumping on the car and then he's just yelling out of window that he'll cut off the poor guy's head and then calls police

like y'know. mean sword on drive

dude you really just nailed it