when we first meet tin, he's young, he's talented, he's confident, he's got a bright future. he's cherished by his family. he has phob by his side. he enjoys his privilege and feels comfortable in it.

his body language communicates this too - he's loose, he's relaxed, self-assured. he smiles widely when he wants to. he jokes and teases.

he kisses phob easily and naturally, like it's the most comfortable thing in the world. like he belongs. like it's a joy. like it's his right.

it isn't that his life is completely free of anxiety or conflict, but he feels so assured of his own agency when facing any problem. siri can't go out without her father's permission? we'll just talk to him. phob is keeping a secret? i'll simply summon him to make him talk to me. phob can't follow tin to the uk? i'll just ask my dad on his behalf. tin truly believes he can overcome anything life throws at him.

privilege is a garment he wears with ease and comfort. and why wouldn't he? life is easy for him.

but then. eleven years later.

the comfortable, confident prince is gone. utterly gone.

he's tense, cautious, stiff. he barely smiles anymore, even when he intends to. the weight of eleven years of repression and obedience and expectations and family responsibility and running away from his emotions and giving up on happiness have left him visibly hollow and fragile. the effort of reshaping himself over and over to fit what others need him to be has exhausted all his capacity for self-protection.

his privilege is now a cage he is chained to, and a weapon he wields without even meaning to. he knows the harm he is capable of just by benefitting from the systems of power and oppression he was born into. the garment of privilege has become an uncomfortable, ill-fitting uniform of authority that protects people who are cruel and corrupt, and actively harms people who are simply striving for a better life. people who deserve more than their lot. people he loves.

he's running from phob in a desperate attempt to protect him. stay away from me, i'll only hurt you.

but phob has changed, too. phob is ready for a fight, and tin has lost basically all his defenses.

so these kisses now - he's so unsteady, so lost. he's helpless and desperate. he never managed to put these feelings away after all these years, he only hid and ignored them; so all that thinly buried emotion just rises up and overwhelms him every time. tin can do nothing but surrender.

there is an ocean of love, of want, of desperation, of pain, of longing in prince tin. the dam holding all of it back is paper thin, even after eleven years. any day now, it's going to break open and all come pouring out.

i have to throw ongsa his flowers because this man is telling the story with his whole body. and i am loving every minute.

the Chinese translation of Emily Feng's Let Only Red Flowers Bloom. Synopsis:

This is such a major disappointment from TV Tokyo :((((( Apparently, they used generative AI for the production of Kimi wa Natsu no Naka.

I haven't even started the drama yet and I'm already disappointed.

The photo album is a sign that the carefree days of childhood are slowly turning into the journey of adulthood. We want to cherish this happiness while it lasts. The charm of a film camera is that the most outtake photo is taken when we had the biggest laugh. Each photo can be taken only once. It’s the first time we wore colourful clothes that we’d never wear again. It’s the first time we stole our dad’s wax to copy our favourite celebrity’s hairstyle. It’s the first time we wore our favourite shoes and walked out with confidence. It’s the first time we did many crazy things together. It’s also the first time… that we experienced love.

They all look so proud of Ko Neung for being on the cover of the magazine or of Achi for being selected into the team. It's this unity, this sense of belongingness, the bond that has transcended friendship and is now equivalent to familial is what is the biggest strength of their gang. And this just shows that no matter if they go into separate fields or move away, they will always find their ways back to each other.

For me, the moon is you, Ko Song. When I turn off the light in my room, a light slowly shines through my window. I see you every night before I fall asleep. When I have a problem, you are always my light. Thank you for coming into my life and bringing light to it. You don’t need to be a star. You can be my sun.