This Is Why Your Dog Hates You

So many options for next year’s race!

Mini American Flag

“This actually feels like the opposite of independence.”

Heeeeeeere I come to save the day!

WHO’S GOT FOUR PAWS, 6 CLAWS AND IS READY TO SEE THE NEW JURASSIC WORLD MOVIE?? 

(also, you can totally tell this party is in Chicago. Mustard only!)

“Really? REALLY?? Look. If you wanted a cat, you should have just gotten a cat. Don’t try to dress me up and pull me into your little HELLO DOGGY charade.”

Almost didn’t see you standing there in all that camo, little Pug.  We guess that’s the point, huh?

And it seems to me you lived your life Like a candle in the wind Never knowing who to cling to When the rancid puppy farts set in ...

Bro. Bro. BRO. Can you turn the light off, bro?  I can feel like, a wicked migraine coming on and all I want to do is get under the blankets, chill in my jammies and maybe listen to some Feist and kinda do my own thing, man, cool? Thanks bro. Can you get the light, bro? The LIGHT. Thanks, man. I owe you one.