Wait wait wait.
I thought we made fun of MRAs because they are misguided and misogynistic for believing that feminism is against their interests and they need a movement apart from it. I thought we made fun of them for not understanding that feminism is in favor of men's liberation from the oppressive patriarchal binary as much as women's.
But some of you are actually making fun of MRAs because you think men have no problems to complain about, and feminism ISN'T for men, because they don't need anything, and the patriarchy isn't the enemy, men are?
Oooh I don't think we've been laughing at the same thing. You have lost the plot.
I thought we made fun of people who said "not all men" in response to women discussing sexism because while they are correct that not all men [insert bad behavior here], saying so in certain conversations is just a defensive knee jerk reaction that distracts from the point.
But some of you are actually making fun of any men who ask to be taken seriously and have their needs met and issues heard, even though they aren't talking over women? Some of you are making fun of marginalized men for talking about the experiences at their unique intersections of identities and asking for justice because you actually DO think "all men [insert bad behavior here]?"
Oooooh you are failing feminism 101. You do not understand what the patriarchy even is. You do not understand where its power comes from, who benefits from it, and who is harmed by it. You have not progressed beyond "cooties" level discourse. I am not laughing with you.
This is why you sound like a clown if you call transmasculine people talking about their issues "TMRAs." If you hear men discussing the ways they are harmed by the existing system and the only thing you can think of is obnoxious MRAs, you're telling on yourself. You're broadcasting the fact that you haven't spent enough time engaging with broad feminist viewpoints to know that men's liberation ideas (NOT the same as MRA) are a part of feminism and have been for a long time.
This is why you sound like a clown if you say "trans men who want feminism to be for them are misgendering themselves" and "trans men benefit from the patriarchy because all men benefit from the patriarchy" and "trans men experience no unique injustices because misandry isn't a systemic axis of oppression" and "trans men have male privilege so they can't be oppressed."
Because even if you take "trans" out of these statements, they're still incorrect. Feminism is for people of all genders. Men can be harmed by the patriarchy. The ways in which men are harmed by the patriarchy are different from the ways others are harmed by the patriarchy. Having certain "privileges" in certain contexts doesn't negate the harm of a rigid social structure that punishes nonconformity.
Men can oppose the patriarchy because they want justice for others AND for themselves. There's nothing wrong with that. Giving them shit for talking about that is NOT helping take down the patriarchy.
The patriarchy is not a war of men against women where men are given all the advantages. That's not what feminism is up against.
The patriarchy is a system where ALL people have rigid roles imposed upon them. All else being equal, certain advantages are more likely to be given to men (or masculine people, or people AMAB, or people with male sex characteristics, depending on CONTEXT). But all else is RARELY equal and even when it is, the range of experiences is vast, and the system is rigged against almost everyone.
Because the goal most individuals have, and the right all individuals deserve, is to be themselves, and to do so by choice. And no matter who you are, the patriarchy stands in opposition to this goal. It tells you who you're allowed to be, who you're not allowed to be, what you're allowed to do, and what others are allowed to do to you. This is an injustice for people of all genders.
We're ALL trapped. This system can only be dismantled if we understand the WHOLE thing. Which means we need to listen to everyone when they talk about the harms the system is causing them, from where THEY'RE stuck in it.
How are you going to escape the torture mansion if you don't understand vast swathes of it because you've mistaken your brother for the enemy and closed your ears to him? He's shouting from the torture chamber next to yours, trying to tell you the layout of the room he sees so you can plan your escape together, and you're refusing to listen because he's been given more food and water than you? How do you not see that this attitude is only to the benefit of the torture mansion, not its victims?
