happy pride month

She wasn’t his ex-girlfriend. She was a girl he stalked and harassed after she turned him down. There’s a really, really big difference between the two

I write like a drunk gorilla.

When you’re a kid you look forward to summer because there’s no school. When you’re grown up you look forward to summer because there’s no school and the work commute isn’t as bad.

good morning everyone I just went to ask my cat why she was making noise but I got caught between saying ‘fuss’ and ‘ruckus’ so I actually asked her “is this what all the fuckus is about?”

i would kill to live in a small home with no financial worries

grow my own vegetables. some medicinal herbs. what more do you need

A cat

a cat.

john mulaney talking about how much he loves his wife and roasting other male comedians that just talk shit on their wives is why The Gays like him so much because he’s what Straight Culture should be

Talking shit about your spouse is a sign of affection.

No. No it’s not. What kind of dystopian world do you live in?

straight culture should be commissioning Renaissance styled biblical paintings of your french bulldog not talking about how marriage is a prison

john mulaney ghostwrote this

Mitochondria is the prisoner of the cell

Free them

wlw who flirt platonically with their wlw friends are valid but u gals are so fuckin confusing

my condonlences to anyone who’s ever lost me

I love the sims because I love architecture, interior design, and playing god

don’t even remember making this post but mood