THE MOST INSANE SHIT IN THE UNIVERSE IS THE STUFF YOU DON'T NOTICE
Here's something that fucked with me today:
Everybody looks different.
I was looking at people and realized...
how the hell are there this many faces?
Nature has been working with approximately six fucking Legos for hundreds of thousands of years...
and somehow you can still walk through an airport containing 4,000 human beings and immediately spot:
No conscious measurements.
And you keep walking like nothing supernatural just happened.
THEN I STARTED THINKING ABOUT EVERYTHING ELSE WE DON'T FIND STRANGE ANYMORE.
You leave your house and just...
No little green indicator saying:
EXTERNAL ENVIRONMENT COMPATIBLE WITH HUMAN RESPIRATORY SYSTEM.
You don't even think about it.
Planet goes directly into lungs.
Meanwhile, put your ass on Mars and breathing becomes a NASA budget.
Some dude is standing outside a Dollar General smoking a Newport while complaining about the humidity.
That's how compatible he is with the fucking planet.
He's intentionally making the air WORSE before breathing it.
YOUR EYEBALLS ARE REMOTE SENSORS
This might be the one we've disrespected the most.
You can know what's happening somewhere...
Something happens 300 feet away.
Light bounces off the event...
That's fucking surveillance.
You can drive a car because two squishy organs filled with fluid continuously intercept photons and construct a moving model of reality quickly enough that you don't plow into a mailbox.
And distance barely ruins the trick.
Mountain twenty miles away?
Your eyeball will accept information that crossed the universe before your ancestors had surnames.
Then you'll use that same eyeball to stare into the refrigerator for nine minutes because apparently mustard might turn into food if you check again.
AND THEN THERE'S LANGUAGE
This one is borderline witchcraft.
I can put something in your head.
PURPLE GIRAFFE WEARING ORTHOPEDIC SHOES.
You saw that stupid bastard.
I never showed you a picture.
I moved my fingers around...
you recognized the symbols...
and now something that existed in MY imagination exists in YOURS.
Tell me that isn't fucking telepathy.
We just gave it grammar and stopped being impressed.
Talking is even more primitive.
My lungs push air through my throat.
Invisible pressure waves leave my face.
They enter holes in the side of your skull.
Your brain decodes the shaking.
“This motherfucker wants tacos.”
WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY DOING?
You know other minds exist.
You're trapped inside your own skull.
You've never experienced consciousness from anywhere else.
You cannot climb inside another person and verify that somebody is home.
Yet you look into two eyes...
She's trying not to laugh.
That dude wants to leave.
We spend our entire lives communicating with consciousnesses we can never directly access...
and become so good at it that somebody can text:
and you immediately know:
MAYBE NOTHING BECOMES ORDINARY
Maybe we just become anesthetized by repetition.
That's the thought that got me.
Because almost everything becomes miraculous again the moment it stops working.
Until your legs won't cooperate.
Then you'd trade damn near anything to hear them say something completely insignificant again.
“Did you take the trash out?”
That's the miracle you didn't know you were standing inside.
And suddenly I wonder whether this is what human beings actually mean when we call something normal.
A MIRACLE WITH PERFECT ATTENDANCE.
So you stopped thanking it for coming.
That's fucking dangerous.
Because your life is absolutely crawling with impossible-looking shit.
The ability to close your eyes in one location and wake up eight hours later having experienced an entire world that never existed.
We haven't even gotten to LOVE.
Two temporary biological organisms somehow become so important to each other that one would willingly die so the other temporary biological organism gets a few more years.
And we write Valentine's cards about it like that explains anything.
Maybe aliens don't need to arrive.
Maybe God doesn't need to rip open the sky.
Maybe reality doesn't owe us another miracle.
Maybe we've already been given so fucking many that the human nervous system did the only thing it could do to remain functional:
Tomorrow morning you'll wake up.
Light will enter your eyes.
You'll exchange invisible thoughts with other minds.
You'll remember people who aren't currently there.
You'll manipulate objects using five little articulated branches attached to each arm.
You'll walk around on a spinning rock without feeling it move.
And you'll probably spend part of the morning thinking:
“Nothing interesting ever happens to me.”
Standing knee-deep in fucking sorcery...
waiting for something weird to happen.
More inappropriate primate anthropology:
https://linktr.ee/ObeyMyCadence
Support Mr. Humble's continuing investigation into why humanity can catch starlight with wet eyeballs but still needs three trips to the refrigerator to confirm there's nothing to eat:
https://patreon.com/TheMostHumble
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