Random tidbits

It’s hard to love yourself when people keep proving again and again that they don’t love you either

Wall of Distance

Life without you is harder than I ever could have imagined. Why didn’t I see this before you stopped caring? I am crying in front of you and you do nothing. I wonder if you know you’re the reason why I cry. I miss you so much seeing you and not being able to talk to you is more torture than my mind causes me already. You used to be able to soothe my wounds. You made me feel like I will be ok. I wanted you to be my forever friend. But now your forever gone.

Whelp, there goes another piece of me.

I don’t like you. Everything about you penetrates my heart and makes it beat faster than it ever has. Your smile shines, keeping my mind from staying completely dark. I love you. So it pains me when I can’t talk to you, because, I don’t think you feel the same. I’m scared to talk to you, but I do anyways. Every time I stutter, every time I laugh, every time I can’t keep still. It’s all because of you. You mean so much to me. But to you, to you I’m just a friend. The last resort when your bored. That, that hurts me more than anything. What’s sad is, I don’t even know if it’s true. For all I know, you do feel the same, but, you send me so many mixed signals that I can’t decide. Whatever happens, whatever you do, whoever you end up with, I just hope you remember the part of your life that I was in.

No matter how much darkness takes over my mind, your light is still there.

I didn’t think something existed that can fill the black void that is my heart. Then you came along and managed to filled it with your light, emotions, beyond compare. So strong that I could punch you with affection right now.

I don’t know why but suddenly, I don’t like you. My feelings have changed. They’ve grown. Your the first and last thing on my mind. All I want is for you to sit next to me and hold my hand. I don’t care if we talk I just want you to be here with me, because anytime you aren’t I feel a little piece of me is lost. Like the petals of a flower dropping into the water, making ripples, signaling for you to come. Showing you where I am. Here. Waiting. Is this what they call love?

Yeah, I’m sad. But thats okay because if I smile no one notices.