I need 37 cast iron condoms. Stat.

Gandalf has a lot of trust in gay hobbits, just like as a genre.

Gandalf knows the wisdom of love. 💚

Don't use AI to write. Use cocaine like a real author.

a severe thunderstorm warning that doesnt follow through is worse than orgasm denial

Literally heard thunders and now... nothing.

horrible news: you have to practice to level up your skills because it's unrealistic to think you'll be good at everything first try

this applies to unlearning things like shame and creating better coping mechanisms and forming new habits

The largest mass shooting in American history was a hate crime against gay people. Don’t ever forget that.

June 12, 2016. Putting a date on this for when it gets reblogged months from now by people who think the post is about something from 30, 40 years ago.

With the 7 year anniversary <2 weeks away, I figured I’d reblog this

952 days left

“If I had time travel I’d kill Hitler” “If I had time travel I’d stop my favourite politician getting assassinated” you’re all thinking way too small. If I had time travel I’d stop Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin from dying on the moon due to Soviet sabotage, kicking off the Great Nuclear War and devastating half of the planet.

Good Job.

do you think no one else has time travel

Happy one month anniversary to this post that has not allowed me a single day of fucking peace since I made it.

wow if only you had a time machine

Honestly having reached a billion notes I think it’s safe to say that in the Year of our lord 2041, this is the most popular tumblr post out there.

I’m killing your parents before you’re born

:)

Still here, why’d you hesitate @derinthescarletpescatarian

Your mum’s ability to hold up under active gunfire was really hot. I’m your dad now.

Isn’t that the plot of Terminator

Where do you think the plot for Terminator came from?

This is such a classic trainwreck post that has the vibes of a 2014 screenshot posted to Pinterest and then the last addition is just last Tuesday I can’t even

Imagine how I feel

It doesn’t have to

Yes it does.

Of course it has to, it gets a billion notes in 2041