Not Slim Kinda Shady

All eyes were on you as you walked into the bullpen. Tucked right behind your colleague Dr. Spencer Reid. Whom you had spent the night before with. And whom you were arriving together at work with. Not leaving much to the imagination of your coworkers.

You took your seat, trying your hardest to seem casual. Flipping through a file that had been left on your desk when a shadow peered over you. You darted your eyes up, meeting J.J.’s wide grin. Her hand reaching out and snatching the file folder from you. Earning a scoff from you. Leaning back in your chair and raising a brow at her.

“You have to come with me, it’s urgent,” J.J. insisted, motioning for you to follow her.

You sighed. Standing shortly before she wrapped a hand around your wrist and dragged you behind her. Not entirely sure you knew where she was taking you, but knowing what it was about. All too close with your coworkers, so of course anytime something was different they noticed. And it’s not like your night prior was a secret.

“Penelope’s office?” you questioned to no response.

J.J. snickered back at you as she opened the door. Thrusting you both inside and closing the door swiftly. Greeted by the smiling faces of Penelope and Emily. Playfully rolling your eyes as you leaned back against the wall.

“Okay. You have to tell us everything!” J.J. practically jumped up and down with excitement.

Your date the night before with Dr. Spencer Reid. Something your coworkers had practically set up, despite both of you respectfully declining over and over. Not that you did not find each other attractive, simply that neither of you were perusing relationships.

“Guys, come on—“

“Please, Y/N! We have to know,” Emily smiled widely, folding her hands together to beg.

Both of you had agreed to go. Hoping it would shut all your coworkers up. Agreeing that it was a friend’s hangout, nothing more than that. It was wrong to date workers in your field, anyway. Deciding to get some takeout and hangout at his place. Learning that you two actually had a lot more in common than you had previously thought.

You smiled at the memory, which only fed the flames.

“That good, huh?” Penelope laughed a little when she saw your cheeks bleed.

You leaned your head back against the wall. Chuckling to yourself, closing your eyes for a moment.

It was good. Fun even. But deep down you could never continue with Dr. Reid. Your heart belonged to another. One no one in the BAU was even aware of. Brash and by the book. Leader of the team. Your boss: Aaron Hotchner.

It was never meant to happen. And it was especially never meant to continue. Having stayed late one night at the recreational center. Weaning on the early hours of morning, longer than you meant to stay on a Friday. Practicing your punches after you had taken a rather hard hit on a previous mission. Needing to hone your skills so you could defend yourself. Getting frustrated at the memory.

Which was when Hotch had entered the building. Initially, it had embarrassed you. Caught training so late. By none other than your boss. Assuming he was judging you. Having lost respect for you after the last suspect. But there was no judgement behind his deep eyes. Only understanding. Knowing you needed guidance, Hotch removed his blazer and loosened his tie. Hands resting gently along your arms to demonstrate how you needed to move. Unintentionally resting one hand on your hip and pressing his body a little too close to yours.

Tension grew the more you learned together. Both of you growing sweaty and out of breath. Which was when you leaned your head back onto his shoulder without thinking. Chest heaving and eyes closed. Until both his hands spayed along your waist. Looking at him in a way you never had before. Ending with the two of you scurrying out to his SUV, barely able to stop touching one another the entire way.

Lying nude in the backseat of his car, you both swore to never tell anyone. Which should have been the end of it. But lingering looks during meetings and the soft grazing of hands on one another’s bodies made that difficult. Still keeping it secret and professional, but never a label. Never exclusive. Never a real relationship.

And since that was the case, you decided to play into all the questions. Shrugging your shoulders and beginning to fiddle with your bracelet on your wrist. Avoiding eye contact with your coworkers and smiling. Dropping your voice, “Oh, you know…”

“No, we don’t!” Penelope’s eyebrows pinched together.

“You’re not supposed to kiss and tell,” you smiled widely. Earning a squeal of excitement from all three of them. Morphing into some shared laughter and glee.

Until a knock came across the office door. Silencing all of you swiftly. Having to lock into some makeshift lie that you all could agree on. Reviewing the last case you had closed just to make sure all the paperwork matched. Silently cringing when the door creaked open and all four of you were nestled around Penelope’s computer screens.

“Hey, Garcia, have you—“ Spencer finally looked up and saw you all together, “Woah…”

His hands raising in a playful defense. Eyebrows bouncing up his forehead as he forced an awkward smile, “Sorry. I didn’t realize you all were having a, um, meeting.”

“No— NO! Come on in, Spence,” J.J. waved him inside.

“I was actually looking for Y/N,” Spencer’s expression softened when he met your eyes. Having to ignore the pinch on your lower back from Emily when those words casually left his lips. Watching as he unzipped one of the flaps on his messenger bag. Pulling out a sparkling pair of earrings that dangled from his fingers, “I forgot to give these back. You had me hang onto them last night so you didn’t lose one.”

Which only made your face absolutely red hot with embarrassment. Lips sealed tightly as your eyes widened, refusing to look to the women surrounding you. Realizing immediately how bad that sounded. The implication of his words completely going over his head. Stepping forward to him, you held your hand out. Accepting them from his fingertips and smiling, “Thank you, Spencer.”

“Of course,” he waved as he walked back out the door.

All you could do was clinch your fists at yours sides. The inevitable waiting behind you. Knowing the moment you turned, all three of their faces would be beaming. Cursing yourself for feeding into this fantasy the girls brewed up.

Begrudgingly, you turned on your heel. Meeting the six eyes that had a million questions behind them. All a little cocky. All entirely nosey. Before any of them could start back, your pager buzzed. Unclipping it and showing them with a shrug, “Duty calls.”

Exiting to a collective groan from them. Allowing the door to shut on its own as you quickened your pace. Hurrying to your desk in the hopes of getting your eyes on the one paging you. Expecting to meet Hotch there, but only finding a filing folder laid neatly in front of your seat. Disappointment settling in your stomach. Looking up at his office, catching him taking his seat in that exact moment. Blinds barely parted, only getting a small glimpse of his figure.

He didn’t even wait to see you.

It had your eyebrows forcing together as you took your seat. Opening and scanning the documents, but not comprehending any of it. Your mind would not let you. Focused too hard on the fact Hotch was acting distant.

Maybe he was just busy.

You shook your head. Hunching so that you could force yourself into the document. Even if you had to reread every line, you would get this report to stick in your mind. Noting all the details. Writing down locations and times. Absolutely pouring your all into this. Anything to repress the thoughts of your superior that flooded your mind.

Sleeping over at your coworker’s was not exactly the most comfortable. Hours into the day, your eyes were growing heavy. Blinking slower and rubbing them more often. Deciding to go grab a cup from the communal coffee pot. Staring down at the dark, over roasted liquid. Even if you were being clawed down by sleepiness, there was no way you were drinking it black. Too bitter. You stepped to the side and began opening the tiny cups of creamer the BAU offered. French vanilla. Imagining whoever did the ordering preferred it.

Footsteps caught your attention. Meeting Spencer’s eyes and giving him a head nod. Listening as the coffee dripped into his disposable cup the same way yours had.

“How’s it going?” he casually asked as he reached for some of the yellow sweetener packets.

“Tired,” you mumbled, grabbing the regular sugar packets.

Making him laugh as he mixed in the sweetener with the thin stirring straw. Blowing on his coffee before putting the sippable lid on it.

“Would you want to come over again tonight?” Spencer asked, holding his cup of coffee with two hands.

You glanced up at him with a smile. Refocusing to the cup of coffee you continued putting creamer in. Watching as the color slowly but surely lightened.

“Maybe watch another movie? I mean, it is a whole franchise. If you ever want to watch them all, we’ve gotta get to the sequels,” Spencer smiled.

“How many are there?” you mindlessly questioned as you began stirring in the sugar that had no doubt clumped at the bottom.

“Six,” he sipped his drink.

“That’s a lot of fighting in space,” you chuckled, finally trying your own drink.

“Yeah, and that’s not even including the comics and holiday specials,” he shrugged matter-of-factly.

“I’m not sure if I’m gonna be able to tonight, but I won’t say no. Text me after work, I’ll go home and get my car this time. Makes it a little easier to leave instead of crashing on your couch,” you said giggling.

“Sweet,” he offered his cup out to you in cheers. Which you happily reciprocated. Even after all that sugar and cream, it was still not quite to your liking.

Going your separate ways. Returning to the mounds of paperwork along your desk. Finalizing each report as you made your way down the stack. Not sure how so many had gotten away from you, but that was no matter. It was work that had to be done regardless. Entirely zoned in on your desk. Not even flinching as bodies would pass by or someone would talk a little too loud. This job was so easy to lose yourself in.

A hand flattened at the edge of your desk. Familiar fingers splayed along the wood top. Thick and matured, hair going right past his wrist. You blinked before slowly angling to look up at him.

Hotch. His brows resting flat against his eyes. Staring harshly down at you. You felt heat rise to your face. Tongue coming out to wet your lip, nearly speaking when he did first.

“Y/L/N, I need to see you in my office,” straight to the point as always.

You nodded. Following behind him up the stairs. Arms folded in front of your chest. Staring at his broad back. Shoulders shifting with each step he took. Remembering all the blemishes and scars that hid beneath all those layers of business. Everything around you seemingly fading as you entered his office.

Hotch rounded his desk and sat. Gesturing for you to take the chair opposite his. Which you accepted. Stiffening your back and folding your hands neatly in your lap. Keeping your eyes on him as he picked up a folder.

“Did you get the file I left on your desk?” Hotch sternly questioned, his own eyes not leaving the paperwork on his desk.

“Yes sir,” you kept it formal, “Young men going missing without a trace in Colorado. Too many to be a coincidence.”

“Mmhmp,” Hotch nodded along with your words, “Think you can contact the local department and see if they want us?”

“Of course,” you said.

Shifting into what almost felt like an interrogation. Question after question regarding anything and everything you had been working on for the past quarter. Ranging from quizzing to trivial. Tone nearly as stiff as his shoulders. Seemingly writing down each and every response you gave. Nonsensical to some, but you knew Hotch always had a reason for what he did. Even if that reason was to just hear his own head roar. And you would be remiss if you acted like you did not also love hearing him talk.

Part of you wondered if this was an evaluation. Maybe Strauss had been hammering him. Perhaps unsatisfied with you in some way or another. That woman had a weird way of picking favorites. Regardless, you were confident in your abilities. Answering any and all questions.

“And… How was your date?”

There it was. The real question he had been waiting to ask the whole time. Beating around the bush so that he could let his emotions mellow out.

You swallowed, “Fine.”

His dark eyes peered into yours. Lips pushed tightly together as the human body would allow. A vein prodding out of his neck and the skin on his forehead wrinkling. Nostrils flaring with each heavy breath. Eyebrows pinched to signal how hard he was thinking of what he would say next. For the first time since you entered, he leaned back in his seat. Arms resting behind his head, pen still held between his fingers.

Hotch nodded, “That’s good.”

His teeth were locked together. Jaw flexing as he ground them against each other. Expression unchanged, but posture giving him away. Clearly needing to know more. Thoughts strong behind his eyes as he scanned you up and down. Able to read you like a book. Knowing there were things you were not telling him.

But he could figure it out.

“You know,” Hotch’s eyes drifted to the window that overlooked the bullpen, “He left already.”

Your throat tightened up. Looking over to the clock and realizing what time it actually was. Almost an hour you had wasted in here with Hotch. Everyone else had gone home at their scheduled time. But you were still here.

“Guess I’ll be taking the bus alone then,” you exhaled a chuckle, swiftly standing from your seat.

“Let me take you home,” Hotch insisted. Standing up before you even got the chance to decline his offer. Slipping his coat off the hook and onto his body. A hand on the small of your back guiding you to the door. Sending chills down your arms and warming your palms.

Timing was always crucial with SSA Hotchner. Cleverly planning out every detail he had control over. Like how he kept you in his office long enough to ensure that everyone had left the building. Making sure the two of you could leave together, even if you had not agreed to letting him take you home. He could have still walked you to the parking lot. Maybe even taking the bus home with you because public transport was never the safest, especially for a young woman as beautiful as you.

Stopping by your desk to grab your bag, Hotch led both of you out into the dark night. Your bodies tucked close to one another as you silently continued into the parking lot. Street lamps littering the path to his vehicle. Clicking of his thumb against the key fob followed by his headlights shining on. He opened the passenger door for you before you could even reach your hand out. Always a gentleman.

Circling around the car, Hotch took his place behind the wheel. Starting the vehicle without a word. The radio was silent as always, even if it was set to the modern hits station every time. You wondered if he listened to it when he was alone. Staring out your window, you watched the buildings pass you by. Local coffee spots, some fusion restaurants, the occasional small business; all still lively as people went in and out the doors.

Then you saw the turn you would take to get to your apartment pass. Sitting up a little because there was no way he missed it. You knew, just as well as he did, that he knew the way. Looking over to him with a confused brow.

“Hotch?”

No response. Continuing down the road like nothing was wrong. Keeping his eyes locked ahead of him.

“Hotch!”

More demanding this time. But he did not care.

“Aaron…”

Your tone softened. Causing his shoulders to tense. Loss of formality stirring in his guts. Hating that you had such power over him. Also hating how inquisitive you always were. Hoping that you would not have immediately noticed so maybe his excuse would sound more viable.

“I’ve just got to swing by my apartment real quick,” he deadpanned in his normal tone.

His apartment. A handful of blocks away from yours. Taking the alternate route. Where he would have to completely b-line past your own. He was not being sly. This was a game. One you did not sign up to play.

A smile crept across your face as you looked forward. Playing hard to get, trying to not give him the satisfaction of your wide eyes glazing over him. Faming ignorance.

Which he could see right through.

Retreating back into the previous silence. Passing through intersections, somehow continuing to get red light after red light. Prolonging this experience between you. Pretending there was nothing more to say. That this was completely normal. It made it all the more fun.

Aaron’s hand extended across the middle. Breaking the invisible barrier between you. His hand splayed along your thigh. Thick fingers digging into the flesh. Scrunching up the fabric of your pants. Painstakingly close to your core. You shifted in the seat, trying to adjust your posture to the best of your ability.

“There’s another case coming up in Seattle,” Hotch’s voice said all too casually. Hand creeping up your thigh with each word. All too calm for how close he was to the seam of your pants. Daring to trace the material, “We will all have to head out tomorrow. Their team is expecting us.”

He had you looking at that case in Colorado for nothing.

You coyly nodded, barely giving him a ‘mmhmp’ as a response.

Allowing his hand to continue its trek. Dancing up to your button and picking at it with his fingertip. Strumming against the cool metal that held your pants together. Teasing you with how softly he touched you. Able to hover the rest of his hand above your body as to not touch you too much. Hoping it would make you crave more.

But you kept your gaze forward. Hiding the way your nails dug into your right palm to calm you down. Heart pounding as if you were being held at gunpoint. He had that kind of effect on you.

The car rolled to another red light. Tension making the air hard to breathe. His figure was barely perceivable from your peripheral. Bathed in mostly darkness, save for the soft reflection of red accenting him. Tracing the arch of his nose in your mind. It was almost like a game of chicken. Keeping your eyes off one another. Seeing which of you would break first.

A soft click loosened your waistband. Zipper humming as it was dragged down. The air caught in your throat as your lip quivered. Overwhelmed with excitement. Readjusting your hips so it was easier for him to slip his hand down the front. You swore you could see his mouth curve into a smile at that. It was all so agonizing. The sluggish speed in which his fingers roamed down the front of your panties. Almost as if he was learning the flat pattern printed on them. Doing whatever it takes to get a reaction out of you.

Stopping his movements entirely. Waiting for you to ask the next question. Wanting to hear your voice, broke as he imagined it. Even if this night ended with nothing more than his hand down the front of your pants. He could wait as long as he needed. Even if his cock was begging for attention, or his mind was filled with images of your nude body. If it meant you gave him even the smallest reciprocation, the wait will have been worth it.

His willpower was unbelievable.

You swallowed harshly. Taking a deep breath, “Why are we waiting...?”

His eyes darted to the side. Eyebrows knitting at the question. Unsure what you could be referring to. Wondering if you had a sudden stroke of boldness. Nipping this game in the bud, tired of the tease he loved so much.

“To leave, I mean,” you clarified.

Making him smirk, “I had something I needed to take care of first.”

That caught your attention. Finally turning your head to fully look at him. Still as stoic as ever. Facing forward as if his fingers were not tucked down your trousers. Like he was not one quick movement from being inside you.

“More important than a case?” there was a tease in your words.

Darkened eyes looked over to you. His cheeks bulbing with the smile on his lips. An eyebrow arching up his forehead. Quickly glancing down your figure, then back to your eyes. Looking back to the road before him, expression falling flat once more. Ignoring the question verbally, but that look told you all you needed to know.

Your insides were twisting with excitement. Sinking your teeth into your bottom lip as you tried not to smile too widely. Tingling in your core bordering on unbearable.

With a flex of his middle finger, it slowly began to trace your slit. Over top your underwear, sending chills down your body. Trying to keep your demeanor. But when his fingertip pressed against your aching clit, you could not help but jerk.

Vibrations came from your pocket.

Almost instantly, his hand retreated. Resting back on the steering wheel as you sighed. Reaching for your phone and flipping it open. Cursing yourself for not silencing it completely.

“Everything okay?” monotonous tone questioned.

“Y-Yeah. It’s, um…” stopping yourself from completing that thought as you stared at the small illuminated screen. Spencer’s message sat next to the tiny digital envelope. Checking to see if you made it home okay. Offering up his previous invitation from the coffee pot.

“Reid?” more of a statement than a question.

Your head turned with haste. Looking over at your superior whose expression was lacking any and all joy it previously held. Lips tightly held together and nostrils flaring with every breath from his nose. Eyebrows furrowing as he stared at the road signs. Noticing the way his hands gripped the steering wheel harder than before. Knuckles turning white with every curved movement. Behaving more like how he had in his office while questioning you.

“It’s nothing,” you lied. Choosing not to respond to the kind message. Clicking the phone closed and hiding it away in your pocket once more. Not liking how cold Hotch had suddenly become. Preferring the version of him he only gave you in private. Not whatever authoritarian persona this was.

A shallow nod was all he gave you. Uncomfortable this time, silence returned in the cab of the SUV. Feeling awkward as you folded your hands in your lap. Looking back out the window. Trying your damndest to focus on anything to pass the time. Praying for the ride to come to an end. Familiar street signs told you that Hotch’s apartment was near.

Turning into the parking lot, the vehicle was illuminated by the street lights. Pulling into his assigned parking spot in front of his apartment. More of a townhouse, really. Shifting of gears sounding as loud as gun shots. Engine dying off with the click of his key. Dinging as a reminder that the key was still in the ignition. Interior lights softly glowing with their yellow hue. Uncomfortably aware of your pants being undone. Tightening your arms around your abdomen, hoping to hide it. Shame coursing through you now.

Neither of you moved. Staying long enough that the interiors faded back to black. Seeing your reflection in the passenger window now. Closing your eyes and turning forward. Taking a deep breath in hopes of calming your rapid heart. Praying for the lump in your throat to disappear. Your leg begging to bounce, but forcing its stillness.

His door opening made you jump. Finally looking over to his seat. Only catching a glimpse of the back of his blazer. Swiftly returning your gaze to your lap. Waiting to hear the front door close so you could melt into your embarrassment. Wait for him and beat yourself up about the whole situation. How could you have let something this unprofessional happen? Or even let yourself dream of more with him? You were a fool.

The passenger door opened. Pulling all your attention back to reality as you flinched at the sound. Looking up at Hotch as he leaned down just a little. An arm resting against the curve of the doorframe. Brown eyes heavy against yours. Expression still flat and unreadable. You could not breathe under his gaze. Knowing you had to look just like a deer in headlights.

“It’s gonna take a minute. Do you want to come inside?” Hotch offered his hand out to you.

Hesitance wrapped around you. Unable to read him as well as he read you. That’s why he was so good at his job. It was always so hard to tell what he was thinking. What his intentions are. How he really feels. Which is why you always took his word for things. Despite the anger that was clearly brewing behind his eyes. Ignoring his clear distaste for you and Reid’s rendezvous. He was holding a hand out for you to take.

And who were you to decline?

Placing your shaking hand in his, he helped you out of the car. Closing the door behind you as gentlemanly as ever. Walking in tandem up the short few steps leading to his front door. Car honking behind the two of you as he locked it. Hotch began to unlock his door, “I’ll try and make this quick. Seems like you’ve got somewhere to be tonight.”

It was passive aggressive. The way his tone betrayed him with those words. Irritation boiling under the surface. Letting his cool and collected exterior melt for a moment.

“No. I don’t… I don’t have anywhere to be tonight,” your voiced faded into a whisper as you followed close behind him. He always kept his home a little colder than you did. Sending a chill down your spine when it met your skin. Reaching your hand back to lock the door. A routine. One developed after far too many nights where Hotch had to rush inside on an important phone call. Scrambling to get to his office so he could reference a certain page of a certain report. You had taken to doing it for him. Like now where he refused to face you. Making it easier for him to keep his distance. To seem as cold as the temperature inside his home.

His body was stiff. Head hung a little lower than normal as he rested his hand on the little table that sat in his entryway. Usually where he dropped his keys. Now where his fingernails dug into the grooves of the wood. Shoulders raising and falling as deep breaths rolled through him. Your feet planted firm on the soft welcome mat right past the doorway. Flexing your fingers at your side, tracing your thumb across your fingernails.

“It was him, right?” Hotch’s voice stabbed through you.

You stammered. Unable to answer nor question him.

“It was Reid who texted you in the car?” Hotch barely looked over his shoulder at you. Eyes glossy as they caught the moonlight from one of the distant windows. Running a hand flat through his hair, “Asking what time you’d be there?”

“Hotch, it’s not—“

His body was before yours quicker than you could think. Looking down at you like you had done something abhorrent. Eye twitching as he scanned your face. Trying to get the truth out of you. Needing to hear it even if it hurt.

You folded, “He just wanted to know if I made it home safe.”

“Oh,” Hotch’s tongue poked into his cheek, turning on his heel once more, “Now he cares if you made it home safe. Not when he went ahead and left without you.”

Venom spit off his tongue.

“Hey!” you followed him, grabbing him by the arm, “I told him I’d let him know if I wanted to hangout tonight! He was just checking on me!”

“So you do have somewhere to be?” Hotch turned again. Eyebrows arched in frustration, lines decorating his face. Taken aback by just how fierce he looked in this moment. Your own eyebrows stiffened. Pinching right above your nose with a hint of disgust. Eyes bouncing between his dark ones. Confused as to why he was so upset. This was never more than two coworkers looking for relief. Never more than some fling off the clock.

“No,” you lowly said through your teeth. Squinting your eyes at him as your nostrils flexed. Reading his expression that told you how little he believed you. Almost like you were one of the unsubs he interrogated. You scoffed, “Stop looking at me like that. If I had somewhere else I wanted to be I would have told you that. You know that.”

His brows relaxed at your words. Realizing how over the top he was being about this situation. Only blowing air out his nose with a flex of his jaw. Trying to walk away from you again, but you were not about to let this go.

“Why do you care so much?” you spat.

Freezing him.

“Why do you care if I go to Spencer’s? It’s not like we’re—“ that one froze you, looking into his eyes that had widened, “You told me this would never be more.”

Both of you stared at each other now. Letting those words linger as they sunk deep into both your stomachs. It was what you agreed on.

Hotch’s hand cupped against the bottom half of his face. Rubbing along the stubble he would have to shave by morning. Taking in every inch of you before him. The way your hands balled into fists that occasionally flexed. The pinched skin between your eyebrows. How you had not taken the time to rebutton your pants. Your flushed cheeks telling him that you were equally as frustrated.

Taking the final step between you, Hotch’s body was nearly touching yours. Your eyes fell to the side, refusing to look up at him. Feeling the heat rapidly fill your face. Sealing your lips and trying to regulate your breathing. The smell of his cologne filling your nostrils. Familiar in a way that made your insides flutter.

His hand gently caressed your cheek. Thumb swiping along your skin. Absentmindedly pushing the weight of your skull into his palm. Eyes falling closed for a moment. Letting out a deep breath as calm washed over you. The knowing tug of his hand led your gaze to his. Thick eyebrows resting in a line across his hooded eyes. Leaning forward, his lips slotted against yours. Kissing you in place of using his words. Maneuvering to deepen the connection. Raising one of your hands to rest against his chest. Bodies meeting the curve of one another. His other hand resting on your hip.

Taking a step, Hotch led you back against the front door. Body thudding against it as he pushed his weight into you. Continuing to kiss you. Morphing into passion and sloppiness. Tongues and teeth joining as you groaned lowly. His tongue parted your lips and lapped into your mouth. Exploring your mouth as to learn more. As if he had not done this so many times before. Maybe he was looking for something different. Looking for a foreign taste. His taste. The one that did not belong here. One he never knew he would have to search for. It planted jealousy deep in his chest. Wrapping around his ribs and making his heart sink. The idea alone was enough to send him into a rage.

You cupped his face with both your hands. Kissing with a hunger you were unaware you possessed. His own hands beginning to ghost down your sides. Gripping at the meat of your hips, then one made its way back to the front. Teasing along your opened zipper. Finding the fabric of your panties once more. His cock twitching when he felt the wet spot waiting for him. Air catching in a low gasp when his fingertip flicked at your clit. Deciding he could wait no longer and shoving his entire hand down the front of your underwear. Fingers curving against your slit.

“Did you have fun last night?” almost a growl.

You swallowed. Feeling your mouth run dry at the question. Wetting your lip with your tongue as you spoke, “I-I… did…”

Now was not the time to be dishonest with him.

Humming a response as the tip of his middle finger barely sunk into you. Swirling around your hole to watch your face contort in pleasure. Loving the way your jaw hung open. Both in awe and delight.

“So much fun you decided to stay the night?” sinking his middle finger all the way.

You squeaked at the sensation. Brain fogging for a moment before you tried to answer. Being cut off when he began to move inside. Finger pumping in and out. Over and over. Adding another and curving them. All you could do was throw your head against the door. Whining and gasping as he worked his magic on you. Always enamored by the noises you offered. His thumb beginning to circle your sensitive clit.

Steadily loosing yourself to his touch.

“How was he?” Hotch huffed against your ear. Hot breath fanning down your throat. His fingers still nestled inside you. Pumping in their aggressive rhythm. Thumb continuing to press into your aching clit. Coaxing you further and further along your high. Unable to form a single cohesive sentence from how good you felt.

“I need you to tell me how he was,” Hotch demanded with a hint of a whine. Kissing you right below your ear. Still somehow gentle with you even when he was trying to be harsh. Needing to dominate you. Needing you to know who the best you would ever have was. Needing to know that he was the one you wanted. Jealousy spitting from him as natural as air.

And you could not take anymore, “I didn’t do anything with him!”

Hotch’s fingers slowed. Voice suddenly catching in his throat. Stunned by your words. Releasing a deep huff into your skin before pulling back slowly. Brown eyes wide. Eyebrows softly contorted.

“We rode the bus together to his place. I was going to go home after we watched a movie, but I fell asleep,” admitting to the truth you had been holding hostage all day.

Hotch blinked. Swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat from your admission. Eyes narrowing on yours. Analyzing you. Reading you. Despite his better judgment, profiling you.

“While I was with him the only thing I could think about… was you,” you hesitated.

The crease between his brows grew. A swarm of emotions erupting behind his eyes. Frustration and jealousy beginning to falter as the butterflies fluttered around his stomach. Taken entirely aback by your words. Deep down, he thought you had finally gotten sick of his distance. Finally giving in and finding someone else who would not hide you.

But here you were, connected to him in your most vulnerable state. Only pure admiration and desire behind your eyes.

His gaze softened. Closing the gap between your faces before finally saying, “Good.”

Lips interlocking, your arms draped over his shoulders. Thick fingers resuming their articulated motion inside your walls. Curling and pumping like he knew every inch of you. Placing firm pressure on your clit, circling his thumb to add to it. Familiar knot planting itself deep in your loins.

“He never could have made you feel this good,” his voice was husky and filled with air. Cock throbbing behind his slacks with every desperate noise you made. Overwhelmed with the desire to please you. Distracting himself from the way your admission had his heart racing. How easy it was for you to give him your all at the drop of a hat. His mind flashing with thoughts of the sweeter and domestic moments you shared. Growing entirely too impossible to deny how hard he had fallen for you.

Nails digging into his back seemed to ground him. Feeling the way your legs tightened and walls pulsed. Continuing to kiss your parted lips that were desperate for air. Loving how breathlessly his name escaped you. All of it telling him that you would be unraveling soon enough.

His mouth peppered kisses along your throat. Never ceasing the movement from his fingers. You tucked your face against his shoulder as your body began shaking. Whimpering loudly as you crossed the horizon. Walls clamping down on his digits. Waves of pleasure flowed through you. Riding his hand through it all. Breathing erratically. Holding him as close as possible.

As you came down, Hotch slowly pulled his hand away. Coming up to cup your face with his other hand, pressing his lips back to yours. Noses bumping momentarily. Tender in action. Passionate in feeling. Finally feeling a semblance of normalcy between you.

Then your phone had the audacity to buzz again.

Your eyes could not help but widen at him. It was so loud in the silence of his home. And Hotch’s expression fell once more. Frustrated at the interruption. Wanting to have you all to himself.

It froze you in place. Looking at Hotch with a soft curve of your eyebrows. Trying to ignore it. Wishing it was not Spencer, but you knew better.

“Go ahead,” Hotch whispered. Testing you. The grit in his words pierced your skin as his jaw flexed. Coldness from before returning.

You reached into your pocket. Flip phone clutched between your hand, you held it up beside your head. Dropping it onto his entry table. Swiftly taking Hotch’s face in your hands and forcing your lips to his. Kissing him harder than before. Beginning to lead him backward, knowing his bedroom was down the hall. Warmth taking over both your bodies as you continued your path. Hotch shimmying his blazer off and dropping it to the floor. Hands then tugging his tie loose and throwing it somewhere. Both of you kicking your shoes off absentmindedly. Desperate to have his hands on you. Guiding your own jacket down your arms and to the floor. His fingers undid the buttons of your shirt with each step. Clothes barely hanging onto either of your bodies by the time you reached his bedroom door.

He pulled away just enough to breathe. Huffing as he looked between your eyes. There was something that needed to be said here. A compliment or maybe another tell of his jealousy. Maybe even a confession. But his hand reached back for the door knob instead. Opening it and stepping you both back into his room. With his perfectly made bed, and neatly organized space. Everything in their place as they should be.

Hotch spun you around, kicking the door closed. Taking down his own buttons as you dropped your shirt to the floor. Shimmying off your pants, leaving you in only your under garments. Your hands then found his belt. Undoing it, zipper and button following closely behind it. You curved your thumbs around his waistband and guided his pants down. Letting them pool around his ankles. Bare bodies presented before one another. His large hands cupped your face once more. Kissing you like this could be the last time.

The backs of your knees met the edge of his mattress. Immediately lying back and looking up at him with sultry eyes. Smiling when he joined atop you. Hands splaying along his bare chest. Venturing along every hill and valley his torso had to offer. Dipping his head down to kiss along your jaw, he asked, “You think he knows where you are?”

The anger resting behind his eyes broke your heart. Jealous beyond your imagination. Genuinely hurt that you had even given Spencer the chance. While this had been going on for some time, coming to this point was far away from your mind. Having to repeat to yourself that your feelings were one sided. That Hotch could never feel more than lust for you. But his actions tonight spoke differently.

You ran a hand through his hair, “I don’t care if he does. I’m where I want to be.”

“Yeah?” a grin curved his lips, showing off those perfect teeth of his.

Giggling in response, you kissed him once more. Hands finding your underwear and guiding them down. Slit still slick. Needing to feel him inside your walls. Reaching for his own boxer-briefs. Palming his semi-hard over the elastic material. Earning a groan from the man above you. Deep brown eyes looking at you with a raise of his brow. Knowing he could lose himself in yours over and over again. Hastily, he removed his underwear. Reaching around your back to undo your bra. Leaving you both completely nude.

Even this vulnerable, with this much of yourself on display, Hotch only wanted to look at your face. The glow of your cheeks. The smile across your face. It was all he wanted. His lips brushed yours, “Been thinking about you all day.”

Chills prickled along every inch of your skin. The depth of his voice like music to your ears. His cock bumping your thigh. Hard and ready to have you. Hotch reached down and lined himself with your entrance. Slowly pressing only the head between your folds. Allowing your already sensitive insides to adjust to him with a few shallow pumps. Taking his time to fully sheath himself between your welcome walls. Both your breaths tightening in your lungs as he rested his forehead to yours. His voice came out rough, “Thinking about how good you’d feel wrapped around me like this.”

Your heart pounded as you tried to compose yourself. But he was too perfect. The perfect stretch. The perfect curve. The perfect girth. It was all so Hotch in a way that drove you mad. You were entirely head over heels for him, and deep down you knew you had been for a while. Respecting him too much to ruin this relationship with talk of labels. He had far more important things to worry about than you. Even if you wanted to matter to him more than anything.

A delicate hand ghosted along his cheek, “I missed you.”

His eyes flew wide. A break of character for you. He knew you hated feeling vulnerable or weak. It often took hours for you to say what you truly felt with any personal discussion. But this was a nice chance. Feeling your heels dig into his lower back as your legs wrapped around him. The gloss of your eyes reflecting the pale window light. You had always been so beautiful, he thought, even more so in this moment.

“I would’ve rather been here with you last night,” you continued, his hips beginning to move as you spoke, “Or at the office. Or your car. It doesn’t matter where. Just with… you.”

Swearing his heart was going to explode, Hotch pulled back so he could take all of you in. Lips parted in a slight shock. Eyebrows contorting, sweat already pearling along his skin. A breath rolled through him almost resembling a chuckle. The kind that took the place of accepting the truth. Hooded brown orbs looked deeply into yours, “Instead of him?”

“Always,” you nodded.

Lips crashed back to yours. Movements growing aggressive and a little erratic. Skin smacking loudly together as his tongue lapped into your mouth. Grunting with each thrust. Your nails scratched into his bare back. His torso was nearly flush with yours, mouth placed beside your ear. Amplifying every breath he panted. Your name barely a whisper, “There’s no one else… no one will ever be you.”

Answering him in a moan. The head of his cock brushing the most sensitive spot deep in your core. Always fucking you so perfectly. Cock twitching as he approached his own release. Wishing this moment could last forever. That you could be this close forever. Connected in your most raw and primal state. Embodiment of your feelings for one another flourishing in this moment.

He was close and you could tell. The focus on his face always being his tell. A vein on his forehead pulsing with deep thought. The short wobble of his lip. You began to meet his thrusts. Sending him deeper, causing your walls to tighten around him. Snapping his hips harder until he finally reached his peak. Spilling inside you with a loud groan. Flushing his core to yours as ropes of seed filled you. Euphoric. Both your bodies warm and glistening with sweat. Staying like this for only a moment longer.

Hotch rolled off you. Arms immediately pulling you against his side. Tossing your arm and leg across him. Nuzzling your bodies together in the afterglow of sex.

“If I’d known it would bother you, I wouldn’t have—“

“I know,” Hotch cut you short with a kiss. Nestling back into his pillows and sighing, “I didn’t know it would bother me.”

And it made you smile softly. His admission to caring, albeit not blatant, imbedded itself in your heart. Swirling around your insides as a constant, warm reminder. Blossoming in your cheeks as they heated up. Admiring his side profile and how he stared up at the ceiling. Familiar brown eyes fixated on the fan’s rotating blades. Allowing you this moment of silence to take him in. All of him. Not SSA Hotchner, not Aaron; but every version of him that exists.

Your arm across his torso tightened. Settling your face into his chest and closing your eyes. His heart strummed a comforting melody for you. The kind you could see yourself listening to every night.

“Aaron?” you said lowly.

“Yeah?”

“I… We…. will we ever be more than… whatever this is?” Each word stung as they came out. Questioning all of this. What had been easy was slowly becoming complicated. Deeper than a hookup or a casual friends with benefits. Letting emotions tangle into your rhythm. Maybe they had always been there.

Silence filled the space. Tempo behind his ribs increasing. Breathing at a halt, making your guts twist and tie together.

“Will you stay tonight?” his deep voice echoed off the walls.

“Yes,” it came out breathlessly.

“Then yes.”

~~~

[END]

// Thank you so much for reading! I had a dream the other night that Hotch and I were seeing each other and it sparked my desire to finish this fic. As always, my inbox is open. Comments and Reblogs are appreciated! <3 lots of love //

{tags}

It was a quiet Saturday evening, and you were supposed to be out with your boyfriend, David Rossi, celebrating your second anniversary. However, he had called you a few hours ago and canceled. He was out doing promotional work for his new book, and he would be late, as his agent had insisted that he had another event to attend. You were pissed, even though he was sweet about it, and apologized, you didn’t care. You hung up the phone without a goodbye.

You were all dressed up and ready to go, wearing a short black dress and expensive, lacy garments underneath, which you picked out just for Dave to see you in later that night. Then he called and cancelled only an hour and a half before your reservations – you were infuriated, to say the least. You angrily got undressed and put on some comfortable lounge wear, deciding to spend your evening watching your favorite tv shows and ignoring him.

It was late when he finally arrived home. He walked in the door with flowers and your favorite candy, and you were even more furious. All you wanted was him— his time and presence, which is most important on a special day like your anniversary, and he couldn’t even give you that. And now here he was trying to make it up to you with gifts you didn’t even want or need.

You stood up from your spot on the couch, turning off the TV and about to leave the room, determined to ignore him for the rest of the night. But before you could escape, he approached you.

“Hey bambina, I’m so sorry we had to cancel, I promise we will reschedule,” He apologizes, pecking your cheek with a kiss and handing you your gifts. 

“You had to cancel. Not me.” You snapped, backing away, shoving the flowers and chocolates at him. 

He quickly placed them down on the coffee table and attempted to explain why he canceled.

“You’re right, tesoro, and I’m sorry. Things happened and I-“

“And what, Dave? You chose your books over me? over us? You know it’s already hard with you being gone for days at a time with the team, and then on your weekend that you are free, you can’t even make it to our anniversary dinner? Save your bullshit excuse, I don’t wanna hear it.” You yelled at him, storming off.

He swiftly grabbed your arm and pulled you back. “What the hell is your problem?” He asked, his voice raised, clearly taken aback by your hostility. “You know I love you, and I’m trying to apologize, but you’re just screaming at me.”

You throw his arm off of you, fuming with anger. “Don’t fucking touch me. And just because you're apologizing doesn’t mean I have to accept it.” 

“God, Y/N, you’re being so childish right now,” He sighs, running a hand through his hair.

That did it for you, him calling you childish after he’s the one who abandoned you on your anniversary— you were livid.

“Get out. Leave. I can’t even fucking look at you.” You spat at him, turning on your heel and marching off.

But before you could get far, he swooped you off your feet, carrying you bridal style to your shared bedroom.

“Put me down, you fucking asshole,” You fought back, kicking your legs and swatting at him, all to no avail. 

He throws you on the bed, pinning your arms down, hovering over you, and you can’t escape him.

“Get off!” You protest, pushing him away, but he doesn’t budge.

“We’re gonna fix this attitude of yours right here and now,” he says, his lips claiming yours before you can even object.

You resist at first, still infuriated with him. Eventually, though, your body betrays you. The feeling of his lips moving against yours, his rough hands trailing down your body— heat pools in your stomach, and it all becomes too much to resist. You let go for just a moment and melt into the kiss.

His tongue gently swipes across your bottom lip, wanting to deepen the kiss, and you allow him in. You kiss him back fervently, his tongue dancing with yours, you wanting more and waiting for him to give it to you. After a few moments, his lips leave yours, and he smirks at you, his eyes filled with lust.

“I thought you wanted me to leave?” He mocks, hand finding the waistband of your shorts and tugging them off, giving him full access. He tosses the shorts on the floor and slips his hand into your panties, his fingers running through your folds and gathering your slick. “Ahh, what’s this then?” He asks, bringing his fingers to his lips and licking them clean.

“Fuck you.” You say through gritted teeth.

“Oh, I plan on it.” He remarks, peppering kisses along your neck and across your collarbone, his beard scratching against your skin.

He angles his hips perfectly and grinds down, his front brushing against your core. Your hips buck up at his movement, needing more. He continues his trail of kisses down your chest before tugging off your shirt and your panties, throwing them across the room like your shorts.

“Mm, che uomo sciocco che sono– I don’t get to see you in that lingerie set you picked out, I need to make it up to you.” He teases, lips grazing across your breast, his hands gripping at the soft flesh and squeezing. His lips latch around your nipple, sucking the sensitive bud, and it hardens underneath his tongue.

“Oh fuck- don’t stop,” You pant, and he smirks at your desperation. His tongue swirls around the bud once more before switching to your other breast and repeating his actions.

His mouth leaves your nipple with a pop, and he continues kissing down your body. Each peck of his lips sends a flutter straight to your pussy. He finally reaches your mound and places a kiss just above your slit, your hips instinctively lifting up. You groan as his lips move to your inner thighs. He takes his time peppering kisses along them, his beard tickling your skin as his lips move everywhere but where you need them most.

“Don’t fucking tease me, David. You've already pissed me off once tonight.” 

“I wouldn’t dare, dolcezza.” He quips, finally placing a warm, wet, open-mouthed kiss against your cunt. His lips latch around your clit, sucking at the sensitive bundle of nerves. You rut up, his arms wrapping around your thighs, gripping them tightly and resting them on his shoulders, holding you open for him. He hums against you, sending a vibration through your core, and your body shudders with pleasure, your pussy dripping with need.

Your hands fly down to his head, fingers tangling in his dark hair, tugging at the strands as he laps at your folds. You grind against his mouth as his tongue flicks across your swollen clit, wailing out as he pleasures you with his mouth. You feel the knot in your stomach tightening, arousal burning through you, your orgasm fast approaching.

“I want you inside me,” you gasp, causing him to stop his ministrations.

“Is that what you need, piccola? You need me to fuck that attitude out of you?” He asks, coming up from between your legs with a mischievous grin, his beard and lips glistening with your arousal. 

“Hurry Up.” You mutter, desperate for him to fill you.

He wastes no time as he swiftly climbs off the bed, standing beside you, still fully clothed, the tent in his pants obvious. You stand on your knees and reach across, finding his belt buckle and making quick work of it. His pants fall to his knees, and you palm his hardened cock through his boxers, before tugging at the band and pulling them down. 

He steps out of his bottoms, now completely bare from the waist down. His dick is swollen, heavy in your hand, tip leaking with precum. Your thumb swipes across his tip, gathering his slick, then pumping him a few times, while you look up at him for his reaction.

“Fuck,” He curses under his breath, his eyes flickering shut. He throws his head back at the feeling of your delicate fingers wrapped around his cock, groaning in protest when your hand leaves his dick, and you begin unbuttoning his shirt. 

Once he is finally rid of all clothing, he climbs back on the bed, hovering over you. His tip prods at your entrance, and you buck your hips, waiting for him to push into you.

“Patience, cara mia,” He says, reaching down and lining himself up with your slick heat. He slowly pushes in, inch by inch, your mouth forming an ‘o’ shape as he fills you.

His hands find yours, placing them on either side of your head, fingers laced together with his. He plants a kiss on your forehead as he begins to move his hips, his girth stretching you out perfectly. His eyes lock onto yours as he moves inside of you, his pupils blown with desire.

“Mmm– Ti senti così bene sul mio cazzo.” He moans, quickening his pace. You feel the veins of his dick pulsing against your walls with each stroke, and you clench around him. 

A moan escapes your mouth as his cock hits that spot deep within you, and your fingers curl around his, squeezing tightly. 

“Ah, you like that principessa?” he asks, and you nod underneath him, opening your legs and allowing him deeper, hitting that pleasure spot once again. Your pussy flutters around him, and you feel that knot in your stomach begin to form.

“I need more, Dave,” You rasped out, and he knew exactly what you meant. He shifts above you, his cock slipping out of you for just a second as he adjusts himself, aligning his pubic bone to press against your clit. He pushes back into you, grinding against your clit, moving his hips in tandem with yours as you writhe under him.

“That’s it right there,” You whimper as he rubs against you, his thrusts slow and sensual, cock sliding in and out of you with ease. Your legs hook around his hips, drawing him closer.

“Are you gonna cum for me, bellissima ragazza?” he husks, breathing shakily, and grinning smugly.

He ruts against you, and your pussy convulses around his cock, your hips bucking up and meeting his thrusts. Your body hums with pleasure as you orgasm washes over you, Dave following behind you. His grip on your hands tightens as he rocks into you, his dick twitching and hips faltering before he spills inside of you with a loud groan.

You untangle your fingers from his, reaching up to swipe a loose hair out of his eyes. His face was flushed now, the sweat on his brow glistening, a sweet smile tugging at his lips, and he had never looked better than he did in that moment.

He leans down and lazily kisses you, still catching his breath. You kiss him back, smiling against his lips, forgetting that you had even been angry with him.

He gently pulls out of you, rolling off you and making a quick trip to the bathroom. He returns a few moments later with a damp cloth, and he wipes you clean before joining you in the bed again. He hands you the water bottle on his nightstand, and you take a swig, soothing your dry throat.

“So, do I still have to leave?” He asks teasingly.

You hand him the water bottle, and he puts it back in its spot, as you scoot closer to him. He pulls the covers over you both and wraps his arms around you. You snuggle into him, lying your head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat, and running your fingers over the hair between his pecs.

“You know I didn’t really mean it, Dave,” You say, a twinge of guilt in your voice. He was your boyfriend, and you loved him more than any other person, and you had said awful things to him instead of just listening to him and working through it. 

“I know, bambina,” He says, reassuring you, kissing the top of your head. “I was just teasing you,” He pauses, waiting for you to look at him. “But if I recall, your exact words were ‘I can’t even fucking look at you’.” He jokes, using a high-pitched voice to imitate you.

You giggle at him, and his smile widens, watching you laugh.

“Yeah, well, that was before I had an attitude adjustment.” You retort, hand reaching up and cupping his face, bringing him into a kiss.

Now, all Gwen could think about was their encounters, and it was so distracting. When Spencer presented the geographical profile during cases, all Gwen could focus on were those hands, and fingers. Thinking about the way they would run down her bare skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake. The way they would firmly grip her waist, her hips, as he pounded into her. The way he slid his perfect, slender fingers into her wet-

Good god girl, get a fucking grip.

Mercifully, she wasn't the only one. The same way Gwen had never craved someone so badly, it was incredibly clear to her that Spencer was on the same page. The same way she couldn’t get enough of him, he was like a man starved for Gwen. She didn’t know how nobody had noticed the way his eyes regularly raked up and down her body, eyes constantly hungry. This brought Gwen to her next problem.

The explosive desire was causing them both to break the rules they’d set left and right. For one, Gwen and Spencer had both vehemently agreed to no hooking up at work.

Obviously, or at least it should’ve been.

Only a few days back at work after the team’s mandatory time off, and Gwen was almost ashamed to admit that they’d had a few precarious quickies in files rooms, supply closets, and empty offices at the bureau. A blowjob for Spencer here, Gwen bent over an empty desk there.

Another rule break, she had accidentally fallen asleep in Spencer’s bed one night. Now, Gwen had a drawer full of work clothes at his place, just in case. It felt non-stop, and Gwen was eating it up. It was better than just nice to be able to swap her depression and grief for moments of complete ecstacy.

It had been a particularly brutal and long case in Nashville and since the team had to double up on rooms, Gwen hadn’t had Spencer’s hands on her in a week. It was the longest they’d gone without having each other since everything had started, and it was really starting to get to her. It was considerably harder to pretend she didn’t want to pull him into an empty room and ride him within an inch of his life than originally she thought.

Walking into the bullpen, and knowing the case was finally over, all Gwen wanted to do was strip Spencer naked and let him have her at his mercy right on top of her desk. Gwen could almost taste the anticipation in the air, and one look at Spencer confirmed that his thoughts were the same as hers. Gwen opened her mouth to make her excuses to leave, but Penelope interrupted her before a sound could leave her mouth.

“Oh! We should go out to a bar together! It’s Friday night and I missed you all and I need a night out with my family before I explode.” she pleaded. Gwen lifted a hand and rubbed her eye.

“I don’t know, Pen. This was a vicious case and I’m exhausted-” she started to turn her down, but Derek cut her off.

“Uh uh uh. I’m not having any of that from you, angel face. My leading lady is right. It’s been a stressful week, and we deserve a good night out with all the alcohol we might need. Now who’s in?” he rallied, looking first at Rossi to back him up.

“I could go for a drink or two, and I’ll buy.” he said definitively. A smile ghosted Hotch’s lips before he agreed with a slight nod. JJ, Seaver, and Penelope cheered. Everyone looked at Gwen expectantly.

Fuck.

It would look incredibly suspicious if Gwen and Spencer both made excuses not to go out at this point. It left her with no other choice.

Gwen sighed, sneaking an apologetic look at Spencer. “Well, I guess I’ve been outvoted.” she said, defeated. Penelope clapped her hands excitedly.

“Yay! Nights out are always so much more fun if you’re there!” she said, throwing her arms around Gwen. Derek threw an arm around Spencer.

“What about you, pretty boy? Think you’ll let me wingman for you?” he asked. Spencer laughed nervously.

“Wouldn’t have it any other way.” he said semi-reluctantly, quickly glancing over to Gwen. Derek clapped his shoulder.

“My man!”

“Where are we going then?” Gwen asked, slightly disappointed from the prospect of having to wait even longer before she could get Spencer alone.

“Okay, I was thinking The Sandpiper?” Penelope said, eyeing her mischievously. Gwen groaned, feeling incredibly betrayed by her BFF.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. What’s all that mean?” Seaver asked, already entertained by the potential dumpster-fire story to follow. Gwen ran her hands over her face, avoiding looking at Spencer who was also very intrigued at this point.

“I-...I kinda had a thing with one of the bartenders a couple of summers ago. That’s all I’m gonna say.” Gwen hurriedly added, not wanting to indulge any further information. 

“But-” Penelope started, but one murderous look from Gwen shut her mouth. She giggled, “Okay, if that’s how you want to be, but you’re coming with me to get ready. JJ and Ashley, you too! We’ll all meet up in an hour.” And at that, she grabbed her wrist and led Gwen towards the elevators, the other girls following close behind.

Gwen stole a look at Spencer as the elevator doors closed, and she internally screamed. He looked so good today, too. 

Goddammit. 

As the girls started to talk about potential outfits, her phone vibrated. Gwen pulled it out and saw the text from Spencer:

Spencer: Later. I don’t care how late this goes. I need you before I go to sleep tonight or I’ll go crazy.

God, it was so relieving to know he was feeling it as much as she was. Gwen quickly responded before slipping her phone back into her pocket, smiling triumphantly.

Gwen: I’ll be counting down the minutes, doctor ;)

An hour later, Gwen pulled up in a taxi with the girls and stumbled slightly getting out. She pulled on the bottom of the dark green fabric, slightly annoyed. Of course, of all the dresses Gwen could’ve left at Penelope’s for emergency nights out like this, it had to be this one. She hadn’t worn it out in years, in fact not since she had to break things off with this damn bartender.

Gwen checked her makeup in her phone camera one more time, trying not to freak out. The shots they all had to pregame could only do so much to calm her nerves,and there was a good possibility that said bartender would be here tonight.

God she could throw up.

Penelope and Seaver headed inside the bar, giggling. JJ came up next to her, grabbing her hand. She gave Gwen a reassuring smile. “Whatever happens tonight, it’ll be okay. And if it’s not, we all have guns.” she half-joked. Gwen burst out laughing.

“Okay, you definitely got me there.” Gwen said, carefully wiping away the tears forming in her eyes from laughing so hard. “Good.” was all JJ said before looping her arm through Gwen’s and walking through the doors together.

The bar was packed, it was Saturday night afterall. The lights were dimmed almost all the way down, but the bar was lit up with the endless selections of alcohol. There were tables and booths with dark blue leather that lined the sides of the room, and a big open area that had lots of people dancing to a low beat. Lights and smoke curled across the dance floor.

Gwen hated to admit that she missed coming here. She used to be a strong regular until everything had happened with- Gwen shook her head, pushing the memory away. She had started to scan the room, looking for the rest of the team, but Penelope found her and JJ first.

“There you are! We’re over here, come come!” she commanded, definitely more tipsy than Gwen was. She followed Penelope through the crowd until they’d reached the booth she’d reserved.

Rossi and Hotch were there, clearly in deep discussion, sharing a bottle of scotch. Derek was leaned in with his whiskey, talking to Spencer, who sipped on a rum and coke. Penelope had already ordered a fruity monstrosity for herself, and Seaver was just coming back from the bar with four shots. She passed two to Gwen and JJ, and one to Penelope.

“Alright, ladies. Down the hatch, and then we dance!” she said. They all cheered, and Gwen tried to savor the burn of what was definitely tequila as it slid down her throat. Spencer turned at the noise, and choked on his drink as he took Gwen in. He started coughing violently as Morgan smacked his back despite his protest. Gwen hid her smile, but couldn’t be more grateful for the dark for hiding her blush.

Very smooth of him, Gwen thought.

“Sorry,” Spencer said as he caught his breath, “Must’ve inhaled when I took a sip.” he lied, stealing another look at Gwen as the others laughed. This time his eyes were dark and full of promise, and it made her core instantly molten.

Down, girl. Just a few more hours, Gwen told herself as the girls turned towards the dance floor, calling for her. Gwen looked him up and down, bit her lip, and then turned to go dance.

A few hours later, Gwen was more worked up than she thought possible. Spencer’s secret looks full of heat and desire all throughout the night were really riling her up.

She was pleasantly buzzed from dancing and drinking, but not too drunk. She couldn’t allow herself to be, not when she knew what was coming for her soon. Rossi and Hotch had taken off a good hour or so ago. Derek, Penelope, and Spencer had gone to the bar to pick up more drinks, which left Gwen, Seaver, and JJ drunkenly chatting about nothing. That’s when Penelope ran back to the group without the men, elated.

“Gwen, my love, you’ll never guess who’s pouring our drinks right now!” she yelled over the noise, slurring her words a bit. Gwen’s stomach flipped, and she buried her head in her hands.

Oh no. Oh god no.

And here she thought she'd gotten away with not seeing him.

Seaver fully turned to face the bar, trying to see over the many heads of people. “Who? Who are we looking at?”

JJ pointed right at him, “Him.” The insanely attractive, dark haired bartender currently pouring drinks. He was just like Gwen remembered. Black v-neck, tight on his slim waist. Neck tattoo, a neatly groomed beard, earrings, and a gold chain around his neck. “His name is Rowan. Agent Maneater over here had a ridiculously hot summer fling with him two years ago.” JJ continued, the alcohol really loosening her lips now. 

Shit, shit, shit.

“He’s the one that she says-” JJ starts but Penelope excitedly cuts her off.

“Gwen says he was the best she’s ever had, hands down, absolutely no competition!” she yells, then covers her mouth as she giggles over what she just admitted to the group. Gwen groans again, muted by her face still in her hands as JJ laughs. Seaver’s jaw is on the floor, and she starts asking all sorts of questions.

Little did the women know, Derek and Spencer had just come back from the bar with the drinks and they were more than interested in the conversation.

“Oh, did she, now? Who might this be about?” Derek inquired, smirking as he sat down. Spencer sat down as well. Gwen’s head shot up in embarrassment as Seaver answered for her.

“That hot bartender, Rowan, that just served you guys! Seriously, Gwen, what’s the story there?” she pleaded for answers. Gwen felt Spencer’s eyes pouring into her, but she couldn’t risk looking back and blowing their cover. She took a final sip of her drink, and allowed the alcohol to talk for her.

“I used to be a regular here a few years ago. When Rowan got hired, we flirted for a couple months before he very boldly asked me out. We ended up dating for the summer, until I caught him here with another girl. I yelled at him, threw a drink at him, and left. I haven’t been back at this bar since, but I have, unfortunately, seen him since that day.” She admitted. JJ smirked.

“She’s seen him quite a few times, actually. They just couldn’t seem to stay away from each other.” she snitches.

“I cut him off when he wouldn’t be fully exclusive with me. And that’s the whole story.” Gwen finishes, now staring at the ceiling and bracing herself for the vitriol from Morgan and Seaver. She didn’t even want to know what Spencer was thinking or feeling.

“Jesus, Watson. Is he still the best you’ve ever had, then?” Derek teasingly asked. Gwen’s mouth moved before she could think.

“Absolutely not, not by a long shot.” she divulged before thinking, and then froze as her team gasped, staring her down. There was a beat of silence before Penelope broke it in disbelief.

“Wait a minute! Somebody beat out the proclaimed sex god over there? And I haven’t heard a single thing about it?” She sat down next to her, and got close, “I, as the best friend, am duly offended that I haven’t heard the slightest detail about this person. Spill! Right now!” She demanded. Gwen froze again, damning the alcohol in her system. She looked to JJ in panic, but only received a sly smile and absolutely no help.

“Sorry, Gwen. I’m actually very curious to know about this because I, too, haven’t heard anything about this new man in your life. Who is he? Does he work at Quantico too?” JJ probed. Gwen’s mouth fell open, in complete disbelief that JJ managed to get that right on the first try.

Before she could answer, she heard a voice behind her that she had hoped never to hear again.

“Gwen? Is that you?” she turned and took in Rowan in all his glory. He ran a hand through his hair, looking like he couldn’t believe she was here.

“Rowan. It’s been a while.” Gwen said, coolly. 

“Yeah, can we talk?” he asked. Gwen’s friends simply sipped their drinks, failing at pretending not to be invested. She nodded, and followed him to a corner behind the booth where her team sat.

Rowan reached for her hands, “I’ve been trying to get in touch with you since I heard about Emily a couple of months ago. I’m so sorry. How’re you doing?” he asked sincerely. Gwen’s heart softened ever so slightly, but she looked down as she rejected Rowan’s hands reaching for hers by crossing her arms.

“Thank you. It’s been really difficult, but I’m managing and I have really great support.” she said. Rowan lifted her chin with his fingers, looking into her eyes.

“I’m glad to hear that. I would be lying if I said I haven’t been a little worried.” he said as he reached up to tuck a strand of her red hair behind her ear. “I’ve been thinking about you a lot, Gwen. I really fucked up with us.” Rowan admitted roughly.

Gwen subconsciously stepped towards him, and his hands slipped around her hips so familiarly it was overwhelming. It’s like her body was betraying her, and she hated that she was still as attracted to him as she always had been. Even after everything he had done, betraying her trust, being unwilling to commit in the slightest. Despite all of that, she considered caving. After all, Gwen and Spencer had agreed to not be exclusively sleeping together to avoid their arrangement feeling like an actual relationship. And it’s not like the sex was bad with Rowan. 

Would it really be so wrong? Gwen thought, in her alcohol infused haze.

But that’s when she realized. It really would be so wrong.

Because Rowan was no Spencer.

Gwen quickly grabbed his hands from her hips upon the realization. “I’m sorry, Rowan. I really can’t right now. My friends are here and they’d never let me live it down, and I’m not even looking for commitment right now.” she blurted, still holding his hands. Rowan looked slightly surprised, but laughed lightly under his breath once he took in her words.

“Gwen, since when have I also been looking for commitment?” he says, letting go of her hands and resting them on the sides of her neck. His touch lighting her insides slightly ablaze. She blamed the building sexual tension with Spencer that she’d been fighting all week long for reacting to him so instantaneously despite telling herself it was a bad idea.

Rowan’s eyes then briefly found something behind her that made him smirk. “Listen, call me if you change your mind. I’m not afraid of a little competition.” Gwen was speechless at that, but he was already walking away. 

Although she had been tempted, she’d already decided against contacting Rowan for anything. God, she couldn’t wait for this shame fest to end so she could leave and end her night with Spencer’s head between her legs.

Holy fuck she needed to leave right now before she flooded the place.

Gwen’s cheeks were burning as she tried to compose herself, and she finally turned to look back at her friends. Even though she tried not to, with everyone else over there gawking and holding back laughter, she almost immediately zeroed in on Spencer. His eyes were ablaze, seething in jealousy and if looks could kill Rowan would most certainly be dead.

There’s no way…

Gwen casually strolled back over to the team, arms crossed to deflect any feelings of complete mortification and trying to shake off the encounter with her ex-fling.

“Please…don’t. I just want to leave.” Gwen said sharply, effectively cutting off Penelope as she began to open her mouth to say something. Derek was pressing his lips together trying not to smile, while Seaver and Penelope were hiding their giggles behind their drinks.

“Why? Got somewhere to be?” JJ said bravely, quirking an eyebrow and taking a sip of drink. Gwen glared at her. 

“You know, you’re not very fun when you’re drunk anymore.” Gwen said accusingly, and JJ only shrugged in response.

Gwen braved another glance at Spencer, but this time he pretended to be fixated on his drink, stirring the ice with his straw and pointedly avoiding her gaze. Clearly upset.

She had to admit that was a little surprised at his acute reaction. After all the sexual tension and secret touches from the last week building up to tonight, and the fact that he had embarrassingly overheard her conversation earlier about him being the best she’d ever had, she didn’t think he’d be that angry at her for her short exchange with Rowan. Especially considering The Rules. They agreed not to be exclusive. Spencer had absolutely no right to be jealous, and Gwen felt herself getting heated at the realization.

Fine. Two can play at that game.

She lifted her chin, “Maybe I do.” she said confidently, hoping to get his attention.

Derek took pity on her, throwing an arm around her. “C’mon, angel face. Let’s get you a cab home, or wherever it is you were planning on going.” he teased. Gwen nodded in thanks, glad for some support and an out, even if it was cloaked in potent ridicule.

Gwen risked one last glimpse at Spencer, and saw he was now engrossed in a conversation with a slightly drunk JJ and a very drunk Penelope.

Message fucking received.

Outside the club, Derek helped Gwen into a cab. She ignored every petty instinct in her body that was telling her to go to Rowan’s out of pure spite and gave the driver her own address, waving to Derek as they pulled away from the curb.

The ride home gave Gwen way too much time to think about the night, and wonder how it all went to shit so quickly. Damn Penelope for insisting on Sandpiper in the first place despite her protests. Damn JJ for being an intrepid instigator. Damn Seaver for being so fucking nosey. Damn Morgan for joyously egging everything on like it was his own personal entertainment.

And most importantly, damn Spencer for being a green-eyed fiend so fucking publicly. Gwen could’ve at least told him off right then and there if it had just been the two of them. Then maybe they’d have brushed everything off and drunkenly left in this cab together. And maybe he’d have his large, attractive hands all over her on the way to his apartment. Maybe he’d have passionately pushed her up against the door as soon as they stepped through the threshold, barely holding himself back from taking her against the door. Maybe he’d have sat on the couch, ogling at her in that way that she loved as she stripped herself naked in front of him. Maybe he’d have rolled his eyes back in euphoria as she sank onto his cock, feeling the delicious stretch of her pussy as she rode him and-

Gwen shook herself out of her fantasy, trying not to be obvious about her thighs squeezing together in the back of that cab to relieve some of the ache. She growled to herself in anger, and faulted the sexual frustration she’d been sitting on for days for her mind wandering.

Sure, she was disappointed at the prospect of not seeing Spencer tonight, but that’s what vibrators were for. She was more angry that Spencer had the nerve to be so indignant with her over the brush with Rowan. Even if it wasn’t expressly said, it felt like a violation of their agreement to be this agitated and jealous when, again, they were not exclusive. It wasn’t his place to be jealous, and he was out of line.

As she was walking up to her door after exiting the cab, Gwen heard her phone ring. She pulled it out and saw his name.

Spencer. Calling her. After all that.

Furiously, Gwen ignored his call and turned her phone to silent. He wanted to give her the cold-shoulder at the bar, so she’d gladly return it for the night. If she was forced to use a toy, he could use his own fucking hand for all she cared. At that, she went inside her house, trying not to slam the door behind her. She stripped out of her dress and into comfortable clothes.

Just as Gwen opened her drawer to grab the vibrator living in her bedside table to relieve her frustration and tension, a vehement knocking came at the door.

You’ve got to be fucking kidding.

Gwen slammed the drawer shut and all but stomped all the way to the door, throwing it open knowing exactly who was going to be behind it. 

There he was, Spencer Reid. Eyes still blazing with misplaced jealousy and exasperation.

“You have some fucking nerve to be banging on my door right now, Spencer. I’ve been ignoring your pathetic attempts to apologize for your behavior and I really don’t want-” she started raging, but Spencer ignored her and pushed his way in, grabbing Gwen by the hips and using her body to shut the door, effectively pinning her there before he furiously captured her mouth with his.

The kiss was angry, wild, and filthy; tongues entwining and teeth clashing. Gwen’s body immediately responded, grabbing Spencer’s shirt with her fists and yanking him impossibly closer while he entangled his fingers in her hair. His hips grinded against hers and she moaned loudly, unable to hold herself back. He roughly grabbed her jaw and pulled back, resting his forehead on hers and breathing heavily.

“I’m pathetic? You don’t even know the meeting of the word sweetheart, but by the end of the night you will.” he vowed. Gwen gasped at his assertiveness, but wasn’t about to let everything go so easily.

“Prove it then, doctor.” she said, challenging him. Spencer growled and moved his hand to her throat, squeezing just enough to cut off some of her air. Her eyes rolled back only slightly, not wanting to give him all the satisfaction of seeing his overwhelming effect on her. It wasn’t fair.

Spencer moved his other hand down the front of her shorts, sliding between the fabric and hissing when he was met with her dripping pussy, and nothing else.

“No underwear, hm? You knew that I’d be running over and ruining you after you ignored that phone call, didn’t you?” he prodded as he dipped one finger into her, slowly thrusting it. Gwen bit her lip, refusing to answer and to withhold his own gratification of drawing any sound from her. Spencer squeezed the hand around her throat a little harder, and added another finger as he picked up the pace; goading her further for an answer. “What was that, sweetheart?” he asked, antagonizing her into a reaction.

Gwen couldn’t help the sharp gasp from the feeling of the second finger stretching her, a high that was intensified from the oxygen deprivation. She almost didn’t realize she responded. “I hoped you would.” she panted. Spencer slowly smiled.

“That’s what I thought. So desperate for me to make you fall apart, aren’t you?” he purred. 

“Yes.” 

“Nobody can make you feel the way I can, can they?”

“No, nobody else, Spence.”

“Good girl. I think you can take a third finger, can’t you?”

“Yes, I can.” Gwen moaned, getting closer and closer to the high she’d been waiting for all week as Spencer added another finger and picked up the pace.

“You wanna cum all over my fingers, sweetheart?” he asked, voice strained.

“Yes! Please, let me cum, Spencer, please!” she begged. Satisfied, Spencer curled his fingers just right, and Gwen’s restraint broke. She cried out as she came, holding onto Spencer’s shoulders as he stroked her through it.

As Gwen came down from her high, Spencer slowly released his grip on her throat and retracted his fingers. She whined at the loss of his fingers but gasped as he picked her up and carried her to her room, all too familiar with the layout of her home. Spencer all but threw her on the bed, and stripped off his own shirt.

Before she could say anything, Spencer’s body and mouth was on hers again, just as unforgiving and angry as he was when he first entered her house. He only broke the kiss to remove her clothes, surprising as it was that they were still on.

“Feeling pathetic yet?” he questioned, panting hard. Gwen half rolled her eyes.

“No, and I’m still mad at you.” she said, lying through her fucking teeth, and they both knew it. Still, Spencer stared deep into her eyes and did not break eye contact as he harshly gripped her thighs and pulled her to the edge of the bed. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll have you a quivering mess soon enough,” he promised as he sank to his knees, “And good, I’m still upset too.” Before Gwen could respond with a brazen remark about how he had no right to be upset with her, Spencer spread her legs and dove into her sensitive pussy. 

Oh.

Spencer had eaten her out plenty of times now, and Gwen loved that he favored it so much. But this. This was something else.

This was the pent-up sexual tension that had been brewing for weeks mixed with the jealousy, vexation, and desire roller coaster from the night out. But most of all, this was Spencer’s pride from overhearing that he was the best she’d ever had, especially over a man like Rowan. He was marking his territory, and nothing could’ve made that moment hotter for Gwen than that realization.

His tongue painted her folds, swirled around her clit, and fucked her hole until she was a whimpering, shaking wreck. Gwen’s fingers found their way into Spencer’s hair; a signal he’d noticed that meant she was close.

“Spence,” she moaned in warning. He groaned, squeezing her thighs in response. He showed no mercy on her as his hand also snuck down to rub his ever-growing bulge. Gwen’s high hit her faster than she anticipated, crying out and arching her back high off of the bed. Spencer licked her through her second orgasm of the night, letting her ride it out slowly. 

He kissed her inner thighs, pulling away. “Ready to admit you’re just as pathetic as I apparently am?” he probed, clearly pleased with himself.

Gwen sat up, her mind clouded and tears threatening to prick her eyes from overstimulation. But she couldn’t cave, not yet. She looked him in the eyes, “You’re delusional if you think I’ll ever stoop that level.” she said, again, lying through her teeth. She just wanted to see how far she could push him, but Spencer only grinned in response. Grinned.

“Oh, sweetheart, you really expect me to believe that when you look the way you do?” he asked, intentionally patronizing her. She scowled in response. He licked his lips as he looked her over, “Do you need me to show you?” he proposed. Gwen’s mouth fell slightly open at that, heat rushing to her core once again.

“I- I don’t- no.” she said, but she wasn’t even convincing herself. Spencer smirked and swiftly turned her onto stomach so she was bent over the side of the bed, facing the mirror on the side of her bed. Butterflies exploded in her gut, and it sent her pussy pulsating. Not only did she look a soft, beautiful mess, but Spencer looked gorgeous. Confidence and pride at the state he’d reduced her to, bordering on arrogance, looked way too good on him. 

Gwen watched as Spencer stood and discarded the last of his clothes, leaving him gloriously naked. He slowly framed his hips behind hers, and dragged his aching cock through her oversensitive folds, collecting the wetness on his tip. She gasped at the feeling while Spencer was groaning at the sight.

“Fuck, Gwen, you’re already drenched again.” He looked up at her through the mirror. Using his other hand to force her jaw up so she could watch, he slowly pushed his way into her pretty cunt inch by inch. Gwen cried out, real tears forming in her eyes from the increasing overstimulation. He started moving, and it felt too good.

“Spence, please,” she started but he moved his hand to her throat and gently shushed her.

“Your only job right now is to look at yourself, and how pathetic you are, as I ruin you, sweetheart. Don’t cum until I tell you to.” he stipulated, voice rough with desire. 

At that, Spencer picked up his pace. Gwen felt a world away, Spencer’s thrust feeling almost painful in the most pleasurable way. She watched herself as he pounded into her over and over, tears spilling over and running down her cheeks. He grabbed a fistfull of her hair and pulled firmly, dragging another guttural moan from her as he bent down to kiss her neck roughly.

Spencer was doing no better. She looked so pretty at his mercy like this, and if he could do this all night he would’ve but his own peak was approaching and he wanted to make sure she never forgot this night.

He slowed, almost coming to a complete stop. Gwen whined in frustration at the loss of movement, but moaned when Spencer grabbed her hair again and forced her to look back at him this time.

“Tell me, Gwen, do you understand the meaning of pathetic now?”

“Yes, I do. I’m so fucking pathetic for you, please let cum- oh my god!” she exclaimed as Spencer started to pound into her ruthlessly, using his other hand to circle her clit for the third time that night. 

Spencer smiled widely, and kissed her forehead tenderly, an action at complete odds with how he was currently thrusting into her. “That’s my good girl. Now cum for me, sweetheart.” he whispered in her ear.

At that, all of Gwen’s resolve broke as she stopped fighting her peak and let complete euphoria rip through her, stars clouding her vision. Spencer quickly followed, his pace faltering as he shuddered and moaned as he came.

They stayed like that for a moment, catching their breath and reveling in the feeling of ecstasy. Eventually, Spencer gently pulled out, cleaning himself with tissues before putting his briefs back on and strutting towards the bathroom for a cloth for her.

Gwen stayed on her stomach, eyes heavy and fighting falling asleep from total bliss. She rubbed her eyes and sat up on the bed, taking in her surroundings and trying to remember her own name. Spencer came back from the bathroom just then, washcloth in tow, and she let out a light chuckle.

“Ever the gentleman, then.” she said sheepishly. Spencer beamed. “Who would I be otherwise? Lie down.” he prompted. She indulged, living in her post-sex fog as he cleaned her up. 

Once they were redressed and in bed together, that’s when Gwen’s reality hit. She did have something to apologize for afterall.

“Spence?” she said, effectively getting his attention. He turned to her, eyes soft as he waited for her to continue. “I’m sorry about tonight. I should’ve fought harder against Sandpiper knowing my history, and I should’ve been quicker to reject Rowan and I never should’ve implied that I was going home with him and-.” Spencer cut off her rambling apology with a soft kiss.

When he pulled away, he looked at her with the upmost serious in his eyes. “You have nothing to apologize for. I shouldn’t have gotten jealous, I have no reason to be. We aren’t exclusive and you can sleep with whoever you want. I’m sorry for that, and I’m sorry for giving you the cold shoulder afterwards. It’s not your fault Rowan approached you, and frankly I can’t really blame him. You looked breathtaking in that green dress tonight.” he says, blood rushing to Gwen’s cheeks. Spencer smiled at the involuntary action, and continued, “I just want to move past this and continue as things are. Would that be okay with you?” he asked, regret from his actions and hope shining in his eyes. Gwen waited a beat, thinking things over. 

“You know, maybe we should be exclusively sleeping with each other.” she admitted. Spencer looked at her in total confusion, but also with something else she couldn’t quite name in his eyes. Gwen knew they were teetering on the edge of something dangerous and unspoken, so she explained it away, “I mean, logically it’s just a smart decision, no? It’s safer, easier, and we don’t have to worry about this happening again. Right?” she said, nervous for his reaction. Spencer didn’t even have to think twice before he responded.

“Yeah, of course it is.” he said faintly, never breaking eye contact. Gwen let out a breath of relief and smiled.

“Good, okay, then it’s settled. No more mindless hookups for you, doctor.” she teased, and Spencer laughed.

“Please, as if.” he joked, but then stilled.

“What is it?” Gwen asked, concerned. Spencer opened his mouth, and then shut it as if he thought better of it, but then asked anyway.

“Am I really the best you’ve ever had?” he asked cockily, smirk plastered across his stupidly beautiful face. Gwen rolled her eyes.

“Oh my god, I’m not even going to dignify that with a response.” she said firmly, rolling over to shut off her lamp.

“You don’t have to, that answer tells me everything I need to know.” Spencer replied cheekily, earning a smack on the chest from Gwen.

After spending most of the weekend together, Gwen was walking back in the bullpen on Monday morning. Penelope immediately approached her, trying to hide the smile on her face but failing miserably. 

“SO?” she all but shouted, drawing the attention of the rest of the team, who smirked knowingly. Gwen rolled her eyes at all of them.

“You’re all so nosy. But no, I didn’t go for a late-night booty call with Rowan.” she admitted. Penelope face slightly fell, then looked at her suspiciously.

“So then, who were you with all weekend then? Were you with the other guy? The newly appointed sex-god?” she asked excitedly, grilling Gwen for as many details as possible while also not letting her get a word in. Of course, that’s when Spencer walked up, hiding a smile behind a sip of his coffee at his realization at what Penelope was asking you about.

Finally, she cut her off. “Pen, when or if there is something to know I will tell you.” Gwen said definitively. She took off her coat, hung up her bag, and sat down to look at a file on her desk.

When she looked up again, the whole team was looking at her expectantly. She tried not to smile, “But yes, I was.” she admitted candidly. Penelope squealed in delight.

“Oh my GOD I knew it! I can’t wait to hear all about him. Where did you meet him? How long has this been going on? Is it serious or-” 

As Penelope continued with the questions, Gwen snuck a look at Spencer. He had apparently found something very interesting in his own file, but she could see the smirk he was now concealing behind his hand.

you snd dave had been fuck buddies for a couple of months now, but due to the sicarius case he was working on, he was always busy and irritable, so you two hadn’t had any time together in a few weeks. you were tired of using your vibrator to get off, you wanted him again but you didn’t know when your jobs would allow time for it and if dave even wanted to still be apart of the agreement.

“y/n i need those case files now,” dave demanded, barging into your office and pulling you from your thoughts. you stood up from your desk and neatly stacked the papers you were about to deliver to prentiss.

he had asked you for the case files earlier but you had other assignments to complete, and his attitude here lately had pissed you off, so you did not care about his needs especially since he had been neglecting you and your ‘relationship’

“y/n hello?” he huffed impatiently, standing in the door frame.

“i have more important things to do right now- so fuck you and get them yourself” you snapped walking towards the door.

all of a sudden the door slammed shut behind dave and he pulled you, pinning you against it. he leaned in close and you felt his beard scratch at your neck sending tingles down your spine.

“what’s that attitude about huh?” he whispered in your ear, lifting your thigh and wrapping it around his hip, the other hand gripping your ass. he slowly began pressing kisses down your neck and you melted into his touch, desperate for more. you were finally getting what you wanted from him. your fingers tangled in his dark locs as you pulled his head up and pressed your lips against his in a heated kiss. his hips rocked against your front and you moaned into his mouth.

“i want you now” you said breathlessly as you pulled away from the kiss, your hand running down his torso all the way to his belt buckle.

The ball had just dropped, and the New Year had officially begun, but you didn't feel that anticipation everyone else had felt. You had always been a bit melancholic, but tonight it was strong.

As the clock struck midnight, Auld Lang Syne began to play on the New Year's TV special everyone had been watching in Dave's living room. The room erupted into cheers and laughter, but your eyes began to well up, your heart feeling disconnected. The voices and music began to fade as you quietly slipped away from the party, climbing the stairs leading outside to the large balcony.

The bitterly cold air hit your skin like shards of glass, and you shivered, pulling your coat tighter. It was a stark contrast to the warm and lively atmosphere in Dave's living room. The party was lovely as always with Dave as the host; great food, the finest drinks, and good music, but you still couldn't shake this feeling, you just needed a moment alone to process.

You leaned against the railing and looked up at the night sky. Tears blurred your vision and threatened to spill out of your eyes as memories of the year flashed through your mind. This year had been tough, all the cases you and the team had solved, and the ones you didn't, the goals you didn't meet, the dreams that were unfulfilled, and the overall dissatisfaction with your life, left you feeling down. Maybe this year would be better.

A few minutes had passed, and you assumed most everyone had left by now, but you couldn't pull yourself together enough to leave just yet.

You stiffened as you heard the balcony door slide open behind you, and you quickly wiped your tears with your coat sleeve, hoping whoever it was had not seen you in such a vulnerable state. However, you quickly relaxed, realizing it was only Dave.

You hadn't expected company out here, as everyone had been busy celebrating. You had been on your own most of the night, but nonetheless, you were glad Dave was joining you. He always understood, and you could be honest with him, and he would simply listen, or you could say nothing at all, and he would just sit with you, not pressuring you to open up, but instead giving you his shoulder to lean on, even in the silence. His presence alone calmed your nerves.

He moved beside you quietly, as if instinctively aware of your need for his company. He noticed the way you avoided looking him in the eyes, silently understanding you didn't want to talk about it— only that you needed him there with you, setting your mind at ease.

He gently placed his hand on the small of your back, his touch making your heart flutter in your chest, but also grounding you in the moment. Without saying a word, he held out a glass of wine for you. You stood up from the railing and smiled softly at him as you accepted the drink, taking a sip and humming in approval. For the first time tonight, those feelings of melancholy begin to subside.

Dave spoke up softly, "It's Prosecco— Italian tradition says to toast with it at midnight, followed by a kiss on each cheek for good luck." He glanced at you, a glimmer of mischief in his eyes. "I think you owe me a kiss now," He teased.

His words lightened the mood, but also the ache in your heart, and you giggled, your cheeks turning red at the thought of kissing him.

Despite him being older and more experienced than you, you found yourself seeking him out more and more. Most of the team saw him as a mentor figure, but you would be lying if you said the same.

You had always been attracted to him physically; he was a handsome man— dark brown hair that was greying at the edges, espresso-like brown eyes, tanned skin, and a neatly trimmed goatee— but the more time you spent with him, the more your attraction grew emotionally.

He always knew what to say when no one else could. Oftentimes, he would cheer you up by simply making you laugh or giving you words of wisdom that always seemed to lift the weight off your shoulders, and tonight was no different.

"Actually, two kisses, one for each cheek," You retorted, grinning widely.

"Well, if we are going by number of cheeks, then technically four..." his voice trailed off.

"David Rossi! Did you just tell me to kiss your ass?" You laughed, swatting at his chest playfully.

"I would never! I am a perfect gentleman," He smirked.

"I think you owe me two kisses now," You joked, finally holding out your glass to toast.

Dave extended his glass and tapped it against yours, before you both drew them back to your lips for another sip of the Italian sparkling wine.

"Now, how about those kisses?" Dave inquired, placing his glass of wine down and opening his arms. "Can I?" He asked for permission, and you nodded.

His hands gently cupped your face, and he softly kissed each cheek— in true Italian style, as he would say. Your body filled with warmth, your stomach fluttering at the feeling of his lips on your skin and the slight scratch of his beard against your cheek. He pulled back, but his hands lingered, caressing your face as you both locked eyes.

He broke the gaze first, looking down and stepping back, smiling sheepishly. You thought you'd seen his cheeks flush, but that couldn't be, could it?

He cleared his throat and leaned against the railing, looking up at the sky that you had been watching alone before he found you. Your body was still humming with excitement from his kisses, and you couldn't shake the feeling that something had shifted between you two in that moment.

"Thank You," You whispered softly, grabbing his hand and squeezing it. You didn't have to explain what you were thanking him for. He knew— He always knew when you needed him. When you thought you were lost and all alone, he always found you.

"Anytime," He smiled warmly, his thumb tracing across the back of your hand slowly. "Happy New Year, I hope those two kisses bring you extra luck," He winked, and you felt your cheeks heat up.

His thumb continued to mindlessly draw circles on the back of your hand, and though he didn't seem to notice, you didn't mind. A small smile tugged at your lips as you watched him. Then it hit you, you hadn't returned the favor and kissed him back, and your mind raced with uncertainty. Kissing him on the cheek wasn't inappropriate in itself, but it was definitely pushing the limits, considering he is your coworker and the age gap between you two. Still, it was hard to resist the urge to feel his skin beneath your lips. How harmless could a little kiss on the cheek really be?

"Y'know I don't believe I returned those good luck kisses.." You murmured.

Dave grinned, "You are my good luck," he paused, and your face lit up, beaming at him. "But I can't turn down a good luck kiss." He finished, leaning down and offering you his cheek.

You stood on your tiptoes and gently pecked his cheek, and when he turned his head, your lips accidentally brushed against his. Your heart sank, and you froze in fear. You pulled back immediately, throwing your hands up and covering your mouth before frantically apologizing.

"Oh my god! Dave, I'm so sorry- that was an accident- you turned- you moved your-" you tried to explain but were interrupted by Dave pressing his finger against your lips, shushing you.

"Hey, hey, hey, shh, it's okay," he reassured, "I promise." His hands dropped to your shoulders, giving them a gentle squeeze.

You nodded, silently thanking him for understanding it was unintentional. You noticed how close your faces were— too close, his eyes searching yours, then glancing down to your lips. The thought of looking away crossed your mind, but you couldn't; his gaze held you, and your heart thudded in your chest.

You forgot to breathe for a moment as he slowly leaned in closer, his eyes had a glint of hesitancy, and you swallowed the lump in your throat. Your mind began to flood with worry about your job and how crossing the line could affect you and him working together. What would Hotch say? What would the team think? What if it ruined your friendship? What if you got hurt? You hesitated, quickly pulling back, not sure if you were ready to take that step, even though every part of you longed for him.

"It's uh- late- I should probably get going," You said, clearing your throat and tugging at your jacket collar. Your heart immediately filled with regret, the distance between you two now feeling wrong, like you were running from something you shouldn't.

"Uh- yeah, yeah-" He laughed nervously, stepping back and scratching his neck. "I'll uh- walk you out." He smiled softly, extending his arm out to you.

"Yeah, thanks," you linked arms with him and walked back into the warmth of his home.

You couldn't help but think about what had just happened. You let your worry hold you back from the one thing you wanted most— him. Yes, there were rules, yes, there were complications, yes, there were risks, but none of it stopped the ache you had for him.

Everyone had long been gone, as you'd assumed earlier. Glitter still littered the floor from the festivities of the night, and the music played faintly in the background. As you and Dave neared the bottom of the stairs, you recognized the tune.

"This song," You paused, nodding toward the record player on one of his shelves. "The way you look tonight...it's such a sweet song."

"Ahh, yes, nothing like Tony Bennett on vinyl," He said, smiling fondly. He turned towards you again, glancing at the spinning record, then back to you. "Listen, I know it's late, and I'm not trying to make things more awkward after what happened back there..." his voice trailed off, his tone unsure. "But- and only if you're up for it- would you like to dance?"

You froze for a moment, heart pounding in your chest at his offer. Your mind kept trying to fight the pull you felt towards him, filled with worries about both of your jobs and your friendship with each other. But when you looked at him, your heart yearned, something in his eyes telling you he wanted you just as much. How could you resist? You didn't want to resist anymore; you wanted him.

"I think I'd like that," You finally answered. His face lit up, and your heart fluttered at his expression. He extended his arm out to you once again, and you gladly took it. He took a few steps into the middle of the room and pulled your hand to his lips, giving it a kiss, before resting his hands on your waist. Your arms wrapped around his neck as the music softly played in the background.

"I just want to say, I'm sorry about earlier," he whispered. "I didn't mean to overstep any boundaries... The last thing I want to do is make you uncomfortable."

His tone, full of genuine concern and sorrow, made something soften inside you. This wasn't just David Rossi, the FBI agent and writer; it wasn't just a guy you worked with, it was Dave, someone who deeply cared about you.

Your hands moved to cup his neck, holding his head, him looking down at you but avoiding your eyes out of worry.

"Dave, look at me," Your voice was soft but steady, and his coffee brown eyes found yours. "You didn't overstep at all, honestly, I just got in my own head." You smiled a little, trying to ease his mind.

"Really, it's okay," You added, looking up at him, watching as his face softened with relief.

"Oh, this part-" He nodded to the record player before singing along. "And that laugh— That wrinkles your nose— Touches my foolish heart," He belted out to the music, a boyish grin plastered on his face. You giggled at him, and his smile grew even more.

The music slowed again as you swayed in his arms, and it seemed the distance between you two became smaller with each step. You couldn’t hardly believe this was reality, here you were in his dimly lit living room, dancing to one of the most romantic songs ever. His gentle touch on your waist, his scent filling your senses, familiar yet intoxicating, all of it was overwhelming, your body pulling towards his instinctively.

There was a brief silence between you, a silence filled with potential. His eyes softly searched yours, as if waiting for something, as if waiting for you. His gaze flickered to your lips for a split second and you knew then that this was it, but this time he was letting you decide, not pushing, not moving, but letting you take that step.

Your hands tightened slightly on his neck, feeling the warmth of his skin underneath your fingers, and his pulse thumping just as quick as yours now. You wanted this so badly, and you deserved to let yourself be in the moment.

The space between you was nonexistent, the warmth of his body spreading to yours, and his lips parted. Your face was so close to his that you could feel his breath brush against your skin.

"I want this," You confessed barely above a whisper, his lips hovering near yours.

"I'm all yours." He husked, and that was all you needed to hear.

You closed the distance between you, tilting your head and tentatively pressing your lips to his in a soft kiss. For a moment, he didn't move, and you almost pulled away, but then his lips responded with fervor, his hands tightening on your waist, pulling you closer, wanting to feel you right there with him. Your hands moved from his neck to cradle his face, and you gently pulled him down to you.

Dave tenderly deepened the kiss, and you could taste the sparkling wine you both had drunk earlier on his tongue. The way his lips moved against yours made every doubt fade away. This was meant to be, everything felt so right, like every minute you had ever spent together led up to this moment.

You both pulled apart, breaking the kiss and breathing heavily. Your foreheads were touching, and his eyes, filled with desire, locked onto yours, a small smile on his lips. You couldn’t help but smile back.

His hands left your waist, and his thumb came up to brush your cheek, before claiming your lips. This time, he took the lead.

The kiss heated up quickly, both of you exploring each other’s bodies, and arousal pooling between your legs. Without breaking the kiss, Dave led you up the stairs to his bedroom.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” He asked, his voice low now, thick with lust.

“I want you, Dave.” You pulled his lips back down to yours, your desire for him completely overtaking your senses, your heart ignoring your mind, and giving in to your longing for him.

You rid each other of all clothing, then he carefully laid you down on his bed, and took his time with you, kissing every inch of your body, giving you all the attention you deserved.

You had tried to return the favor, but he refused. "Tonight is all about you," He said and kissed you passionately before you could even protest.

After spending what felt like hours pleasuring you with his hands, lips, and tongue, he made sure you were ready before lining himself up.

"Do we need a condom?" He asked, breathing shakily, his tip prodding at your entrance.

"I'm on the pill— Are you ready?" You asked, and he nodded, a small smile on his lips.

"Only if you are," He moved closer, his arms cradling your back, his body pressed against yours, skin to skin. His eyes searched yours for uncertainty, but he didn't find any; your pupils were blown with a mix of love and lust. You wanted this— you wanted him, so you nodded, giving him permission to enter you.

He pushed in slowly, and your breath hitched in your lungs as he filled you.

He cursed under his breath as you clenched around him, pleasure flooding his body. He held still for a moment, not moving at all, just savoring the feeling of finally being inside you.

He leaned down and kissed you deeply as he started to move his hips, not rushing, just rhythmically thrusting into you. You felt every curve and vein of his dick drag against your walls with each movement. Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes, your senses and emotions overwhelmed.

The way he felt inside you was like he was made for you. He wasn’t just fucking you— no, this was more than that, something filled with emotion and passion— he was making love to you. It all felt so perfect, and your body hummed with pleasure.

"Don't cry, dollcezza," He said, using his thumb to wipe your tears.

"Feels so good-" You whined, your hands coming up to cup his face.

"I know, baby, shh shhh it's okay," He cooed. He swiped your hair out of your face and gently kissed your forehead, pumping inside you sensually.

He continued his pace for a few minutes before you felt that knot in your stomach tightening, your body burning with arousal, getting closer to the edge.

"Dave," You panted, wanting more.

"Tell me what you need, baby," He husked.

"Need more- I'm so close," You opened your legs more, allowing him to move deeper, his hips rocking against yours, hitting a new spot inside you. Your hands moved to his back, clawing at the skin as he picked up his pace, driving into you with more force.

One of his arms held you while the other moved down your body, the pads of his fingers finding your clit, and drawing circles on the sensitive bundle of nerves. Pleasure rippled through your body, and your walls convulsed around him as you snapped, waves of pleasure surging through you.

Your eyes welled up at the overwhelming sensations of your orgasm, and Dave soon followed behind you, his dick pulsing, before spilling inside you. He softly rocked into you a few more times before delicately pulling out.

He rolled off of you and lay by your side, catching his breath, sweat glistening off of his forehead, his cheeks flushed.

You snuggled into him, and his arms instinctively wrapped around you, pulling you tight against him. Face to face now, his lips met yours, languidly kissing you, and you felt him smile against your mouth.

"You doing okay?" He rasped, breaking this kiss, your noses touching, his eyes peering deeply into yours. A soft smile on his lips.

You grinned up at him, your heart filled with contentment, lying in his embrace, enjoying that post coital bliss.

"More than okay," You answered with a quick peck to his lips, giggling.

You both drifted to sleep tangled in the sheets, your arms around each other, skin against skin. You never felt more fulfilled in your life than you did right then. It was everything you had ever wanted, and you hoped it would never end.

But the morning came, and the after-sex haze had worn off, reality sinking in. You stirred awake, finding the bed empty beside you, and your heart sank before you noticed the note he had left, placed neatly on his pillow. You inhaled, the sheets smelling faintly of his cologne, a scent you were familiar with, and your chest tightened. You wanted nothing more than to stay put, in this moment where everything was felt so right, not having to worry about rules, morals, and relationships, but you knew you couldn't.

The note had said he was downstairs making breakfast, and to help yourself to his clothes. You got up from the bed slowly, a slight ache in your bones from last night's activities. You glanced at the window, noticing it was still dark out, and you looked at the clock on his nightstand, checking the time. It was only five in the morning. Typical Dave, always rising with the sun, even on a day off.

You found his closet and picked out an old Cubs t-shirt and a pair of his boxers. It almost felt normal, like you had done this a hundred times before. You pulled the shirt over your head and hummed softly at his scent that still lingered on the fabric. You quickly tugged on the boxers before heading downstairs.

As you reached the living area, your nostrils were greeted with a delicious smell of a home-cooked breakfast, made by none other than David Rossi himself. You paused for a moment, standing at the edge of the kitchen watching him cook for you, and your heart swelled with adoration. This all felt so right, but in the back of your mind, you knew you would have to face the reality of your jobs and the complexity it brought to having a relationship with him.

"Good morning," he greeted you warmly, sensing your presence, his back still turned to you as he prepared your meal.

"Good Morning," You replied sleepily, finding a seat at the bar in the middle of his kitchen.

He finally turned around, "Whoa," His voice caught in his throat, and his gaze fixated on you, stunned at how good you looked in his clothes. The sight of you wearing his clothes made his heart throb. "My clothes look better on you than on me." He joked, and you grinned.

"This Cubs shirt is comfy, I might actually steal it from you," You teased back, trying to keep your tone light despite knowing you would have to somehow end this- end something that felt so natural.

"You should, it really does look better on you, besides, I have plenty," Dave said walking over, a cup of coffee in each hand. "Here's this, just how you like it— splash of milk, sprinkle of sugar.”

Of course, he had remembered your order, being an FBI agent in the BAU required lots of caffeine, and it was not uncommon for you all to grab coffee for each other. However, something about the way he memorized your order caused you to long for him even more.

"Thank you," You nodded, taking the cup from him. You took a sip of the warm drink, feeling more alert already.

Your thoughts drifted back to last night, how intimate it was, how close you two were, sharing breaths, him pressed against you... It was all you had ever wanted, and now you had to end it. The reality of your jobs— the expectations and rules, giving you no other choice.

Dave leaned against the bar, directly across from you, leisurely sipping his own coffee. "It should be done in about 15 minutes," he said, nodding towards the oven where your breakfast was baking.

"It smells lovely," You commented, smiling gingerly. There was a brief silence, and you knew you couldn't hold off forever; you had to rip the band-aid off eventually, better now than later.

You carefully set your coffee cup down, avoiding his eyes as you spoke up. "Listen about last night..." You started, your voice a little shaky.

Dave's face dropped, his brow furrowing with concern."What's wrong? If you're regretting—"

"No!" You quickly interjected, not wanting him to feel bad when you didn't regret a single thing about last night, in fact, it was all you wanted. Your eyes nervously met his, needing him to know you weren't regretting him at all. "It's not that. I don't regret it, but I can't…" You paused, taking a deep breath. "..We can't do this, Dave, not with our jobs; it complicates things, we know that."

You could see the understanding in his eyes, but there was something else there too, something that made your heart ache, and you wished it didn't have to be this way.

"Right," He said slowly, his tone a little more distant, "You're right, I get it, I'm not really in a position to get involved with anyone, either- especially with the work we do, it's just... hard when you feel something real."

You swallowed, and your chest tightened, his words still stinging despite understanding what he meant. "Yeah," you whispered in agreement. "It is."

There was another beat of silence as you looked down at your coffee cup in front of you. The weight of a mutual ache settled between you two, you both defying what your hearts desired. Worry filled your mind, you felt guilty, like you had taken advantage of him, and now broken his heart, even though you wanted him just as much.

Dave's hand gently reached for yours, squeezing it reassuringly. "Look at me," He whispered softly.

You looked up at him, and he continued. "I get it.. It's okay, and it's not your fault," He paused, eyes searching your face, knowing you were in your head again. "It's just reality, but that doesn't make it any easier."

Your nerves calmed at his words; he did understand, and you both knew you were doing what was best, even if it felt so wrong. "No, it doesn't." You agreed quietly.

Just then, both of your phones rang, Hotch's name across the screen. A case had come up, and the whole team had to be at the office in an hour. You both agreed not to say anything to the team about what happened the night before, and you left Dave's home in a hurry, skipping breakfast, and he understood. You sped all the way home, still having to change your clothes and attempt to be on time for work.

It's been a week since that night. You were still slightly embarrassed that the first time you met his friends and colleagues, you were half naked. Why did that have to happen?

It also frustrated you that that was how you met them but not as much as some unfinished business with David and you had no idea when you'd be able to continue.

Tony and everyone else were picking up on your mood, which is the complete opposite of what it had been for months.

The mood would have continued and probably gotten worse, had you not received a text from him. Your man.

Yeah you wish.

It's just sex.

You're nothing more than that

God how much you wished for him to be your man. The last one you saw every night and the first thing in the morning. What a gorgeous sight that would be to wake up to.

'Just landed. You free tonight?'

You smiled, biting your lip as you try not to reply to eagerly.

Your phone dinged as another message came through.

'Don't worry. No forgotten gatherings this time. I'm all yours'

You really wish he were. How did this happen you? How did what was supposed to be a casual hook up you picked up at the bar turn into something so much more. It was getting so bad that just the thought of not seeing him brought you to tears. When he was away, your heart longed for him. It ached for him.

But what could you do? If you told him, that's it. You lose him. He doesn't think of you that way.

The end of the night finally arrives and you all start packing up your stuff to head home.

"Time to go home. Or in y/n's case, get rid of that sour mood,"

You round your desk, stopping front of DiNozzo, "I will run you over with my car,"

"You wouldn't,"

"You're right, I wouldn't," you said turning to walk towards the elevator.

Tony smirking and laughing mumbling a 'I knew you loved me'.

You rolled your eyes, "Don't flatter yourself, DiNozzo. I just don't want to ruin the bodywork on my car," you called behind you.

Tony, McGee and Ziva had caught up to you. Tony taking a jab at everyone trying to get a reaction as you waited for the elevator to reach your floor. As you stepped in, you got a call from a number you didn't recognise.

'Hello?'

'Is this the number for y/n y/Ln?'

'Yes. Who's this?'

'My name's Jennifer Jareu. I work with the FBI BAU task force. We're currently working a case and we were wondering if you could lend some assistance,'

'You need my help?'

'We suspect a leak in the department so we need someone outside to go undercover. Our unit chief, Aaron Hotchner said that you fit the victimology,'

'Serial killer?'

'Yes, 6 women so far. We suspect there may be more,"

'Sure. Let me know what you need me to do,'

On your way home, JJ texted you the info on what you had to do. You had gone on plenty of undercover assignments before but you always had someone watching your back. Sure you were going to have the BAU team but you barely knew them so you had some concerns.

You didn't think they weren't good at their job or anything but when you're in the field you trust your partner has your back just like you had theirs. But these people were strangers to you apart from Rossi.

But you had to do something. If you could help stop any more innocent young women from getting murdered, you were going to do it.

When you finally arrived home, you put the plan into action. The hope was that the killer or "unsub" as the BAU guys call him, hasn't chosen his next victim. And that he chose you.

You hopped into the shower for a quick wash. You had no time to waste. You kept your makeup simple and your hair down but with some bouncy curls. Your dress of choice was a dark red mini dress. Tight and hugs your body to emphasise your curves. It features a plunging V neckline with thin delicate straps to hold it up. As you twirl around, you look over your shoulder, checking that all the satin straps were tied, criss cross. The thin straps there only hiding a portion of your back. The rest was bare.

You had a secondary mission tonight. Not only were you going to catch a killer but you were also going to catch some long awaited time with Rossi. This dress surely will be hard to refuse.

——

Once you were happy with your look, you shot a text to JJ saying that you were on your way. She told you to meet them at the club. The team had cleverly gotten everyone to go to the club to let off steam. Not something they would do in the middle of a case but since they suspect a cop, they needed to think outside the box.

When you arrived, the first thing you saw was the flashing lights and the sea of of bodies, silhouettes moving as though the beat had taken over them.

The bass of the loud music pulsed under your feet with every step. The smell of spilt alcohol getting more potent as you approached the bar. You ordered a Cosmopolitan. You had to behave because you were working. Your usual choice being a long island iced tea. A couple of them and everyone is your new best friend.

It seemed that cops got free drinks since the cops you were "investigating" were still in their uniforms. Good for you because now you had something to say when you passed. Hotch had gathered the officers in the club under the guise of catching the killer but to club gooers, they looked like off duty cops winding down after a long day.

At the table beside them was the BAU team. Of course the first person you see was Rossi but you couldn't look at him like you wanted. You couldn't give yourself away.

You made your way towards the dance floor, purposely walking past their table as you did. Putting on your flirtiest smile as you let your eyes scan over all of them.

"Evening officers,"

"Evening miss," One replied politely.

"If I have too much to drink tonight, will one of you fine gentlemen escort a lady home?" You asked in a sickenly sweet voice and batting your eyelashes with a slight tilt of your head.

They all agreed. Some hesitantly, some a little too eager. So you hadn't managed to narrow it down there.

As the night went on you danced. Letting go of some of the stress you had. The rest could be cured by the sexy man sitting with his team at that very moment. What was making it worse was that you could feel his eyes on you all night. He wanted you. For the past week, he's been going crazy, not being able to touch you and the night he does, a case pops up and to make matters worse for him. You're dressed in a skinny red dress that sits way above your knees. It shows people a lot more cleavage than he would like. And the v neckline practically shows the whole valley between your breasts.

It also didn't help that you were swaying to the music. Your movements deliberate and slow and sultry. You were putting on a show and it pissed him off knowing it wasn't for him.

But he was wrong. Sure it would hopefully entice the killer to come to you but the show was most definitely for him.

Now since the club is crowded, you didn't expect him to approach you. So your plan was to dance and drink to the point where you may be tipsy and a perfect target. A thought that made you shudder but you much preferred it be you and not some other poor woman. After all, it was your job.

You danced, you drank, then danced some more. Strangely enough it was quite relaxing, despite the fact you were doing this to get noticed by a Serial killer.

After 35 minutes or so, you started to get warm and you thought this would be the perfect opportunity for you to make yourself vulnerable. You downed the last of your drink and placed the empty glass on a table as you passed on your way to the exit.

As you made your journey to the door, Hotch then told the officers and his team that waiting wasn't working. They needed to be more proactive but subtle. This hopefully allowed the killer the freedom to try and attack you.

Rossi was 100% against this idea. Hell, if he'd known that Hotch was planning to use you then he would've tried to change his mind. But he didn't know until you walked through those doors.

The moment you walked out that door, all he felt was fear. Paralysing fear. He could not see you or hear you. What if something happened to you? What if something went wrong?

The cool air enveloped your warm, sweaty body. The dress you were wearing was quite short and you'd left your jacket in the car. You went round the corner, a quiet spot, no eyes. No witnesses. Perfect.

"You headed home, miss?" A voice called out to you.

You look over your shoulder and standing at the entrance of the small alley was an officer. One of the ones from the group. Is this the one? You thought.

Possibly.

"Nah, just needed some air," you giggled, trying to sell the act of you being a helpless drunk woman, "I was a bit hot,"

"A bit is an understatement, sweetheart,"

You giggled again, despite the fact that someone other than your man called you sweetheart.

Your man? He's not your man. Are you actually drunk right now?

"Well aren't you sweet," you said as you bite your lip, as though you're trying to hide a smile. But rather trying not to be sick at the situation. "You know. I'm a bit tired," you added, with a small yawn, "Would it be outrageous for me to ask for a ride?"

"Of course not, Sweetheart. Let's go before you get too cold," He said, his arm wrapping around your shoulder and you had to physically stop yourself from gagging at his touch. He led you towards his car and opened the door for you. "Where to?"

"I live a couple of blocks away. Ashford street,"

You replied and with that he turned his engine on and pulled out of the parking lot.

It didn't take long for you to notice that he was certainly not taking you "home" but you acted as though you were too drunk to realise.

Because it was a last minute set up, mainly to avoid a leak, you were cut off from the others. That scared you a lot, not knowing whether they were there to back you up.

You were trained, sure, and you usually operated without a partner. But you don't know what he's capable of. You haven't seen it for yourself. Sure JJ gave you the quick sitrep but still. You usually saw it with your own eyes and you could mostly get a read. Something to help you defend yourself against him.

The ride was mostly quiet. All that you could hear was the low humming of the engine and the increasing thump of your heart.

You keep up your drunken facade as he turns down a dark alley. Only lit by the headlights on his car. He stopped mid way in where there was a slight indent hiding you from both entrances to the alley.

Your eyes clumsily look around as if you were drunk and you knew for certain that this guy was in fact the serial killer. He got out, walking around the front of the car towards your door. He swung it open. Hard enough to make it bounce back. His hand flew up to keep it open as the other wrapped itself in your hair and dragged you out. Throwing you on the floor as if you were nothing but trash.

He laughed as you tried to stand up. Kicking you back down if you were successful.

"You know it never ceases to amaze me. The blind trust that women put in a man they don't know simply because of a uniform,"

"They're supposed to be able to trust you," you said between breaths. Trying to get your breath back after having it knocked out of you a few times.

"And look where that got them. And you," He gloated, pulling out his knife, "Killed."

You roll your eyes, "Oh God you're worse than I thought," you groaned, "please save your monologuing and put me out of my misery,"

Smack

"Shut it bitch," He growled, "I'm not through with you yet,"

"I already told you. I'd rather you kill me. I don't want to listen to you monologue,"

Smack

"Shut up!"

"How long is it? 3 pages 4?" You asked as red liquid dripped down your cheek, "All about how you weren't hugged enough as a kid. Mommy or daddy just withheld all the affection. About how they thought you were a disappointment,"

You paused for a moment, watching how his hand tightened on the blade within its grasp, your fear fading slightly even though it should be rising. But you were trained for this. And if DiNozzo taught you anything, talking a lot and annoying someone will cause them to make mistakes.

"Is that why you became an officer?" You asked, looking at him. You didn't really expect an answer but you gave him a few moments anyway, "and still... you were a disappointment to her," you stood slowly, just a few steps between you, "Was she your first?" You shook your head, to answer your own question, "no. You couldn't. So you kill anyone who looks like her and acts like her,"

"Shut up!" He screamed before lunging at you. Knife aimed right at your throat. You side step him, and he hits the wall behind you, "what the..."

"Looks like we both deceived each other. I'm not really drunk," you said as you smirked at him.

He growled and lunged again. Slashing and swiping in the air as you kept dodging. You didn't lie. You weren't drunk. But you were tipsy. All the dodging and weaving was starting to make you dizzy. You had to get the knife from him. You back up. Towards the open car door. Once you were close, you ducked under his arm once more and used all your strength to pull him towards you. Sliding your foot beneath his to trip him up.

He fell forward, knife flying out of his hand has he braced himself. He landed halfway in the car and you used this opportunity to subdue him. But he grabbed the knife and was about to turn and swing at you but you slam the door on him. Pinning his ribs between the door and the car. You repeated this when he attempted to attack you again.

The familiar flashing of red and blue catches your attention and you look up to see the familiar black SUVs arriving.

Rossi is out of the car before it's even put in park, rushing towards you. All he could think about is you. We're you okay? We're you hurt?

"Y/n!" He called as he pulled you into a hug, "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," you say as he pulls back. His thumb gently clears the blood from your cheek. You shake your head, "It's nothing, I'm ok-"

You didn't get to finish the sentence because without warning, he leant in and pressed his lips to yours. It took you a few moments because you were in shock. This kiss was not gentle. It had a sense of urgency, as though he thought he was never going to kiss you again. Every single feeling he's felt for you was in that kiss.

Once you snapped out of your daze, your hands moved to grip his bulletproof vest. Your fingers curled around it, pulling him closer to you. If that was even possible. It kinda annoyed you because it was in your way. But he did look so good in it.

"Get a room, will you?" A voice cut into your thoughts.

You pulled away and looked at the source. As you did, you notice a whole bunch of people with their eyes on you. You felt your face going red as you move to rest your head on Rossi's shoulder. Trying to hide your face from everyone.

Rossi grabbed your hand and began to pull you away from the scene, "Come on. You're getting checked by the paramedics,"

"But I'm fine,"

"It was not a suggestion, Tesoro," He said as he continued to lead you to the ambulance.

"He's probably gonna need it more than me," you said. Yeah you were kicked a few times but the last thing you wanted right now was to go to the hospital. You just wanted Rossi.

Still, he took you to the ambulance to get checked. As you walk towards it, the adrenaline starts to wear off and the pain starts to build.

Suddenly just breathing becomes uncomfortable. Deep breaths and sudden moves send a sharp, stabbing pain through your ribcage.

Rossi, being as observant as he is, notices your sudden change even though you tried to hide it.

“You're hurt. I knew it,”

You arrived at the ambulance, the doors were already open and the paramedics were waiting.

He passed you over to them, “She's hurt, don't let her tell you otherwise,"

You were helped into the ambulance, involuntarily letting out a yelp at the pain that shot through you as you stretched.

You were sat on the bench as one of the paramedics examined you. Rossi was stood by the door, hovering and keeping his eye on you.

The medic asked you where you were hurt and you told her. She then proceeded to check your ribs. Her fingers ran down your ribcage, checking for any fractures, tenderness or swelling.

They find no breaks and no other reason for you to be admitted into hospital. Thank god but they did tell you that you were to take it easy for the next month or so whilst you healed. No running, no tackling suspects. No strenuous activity of any kind.

You let out a whiny "awww" in frustration. Something you didn't realise you did out loud until you saw the smirk on the medic's face and heard the slight chuckle from the man beside you. The one you were looking forward to climbing on this evening. Guess that's not happening now.

"You have to be careful the next few weeks. Anything too rough on your body will delay the healing process," the medic repeated, "Then you'll have to wait longer," she added letting out a small laugh as she turned to put some of her equipment away.

"You can take over the counter pain killers to help with the pain. It won't completely get rid of it but you won't be in agony," she instructed, "you can also use ice packs for the first few days to reduce swelling. Wrap it in a thin cloth and apply for 15 to 20 minutes each time,"

"Thank you," you said gratefully.

"We have another one for you," a deep voice appeared beside you. You look over and see the team leader, Hotch standing there. He looked at you with a cross between a smirk and a proud smile, "You okay?"

"Just a few bruised ribs," you answered, "I'll live,"

"Ah, that's more than I can say for his ribs," his said nodding towards the killer.

You shrugged, immediately wincing as you did, "He deserved it,"

"Good job," He said gesturing for you to stand and exit the ambulance. He was stood on one side, Rossi on the other and they both helped you down the huge step, "Go home, rest,"

"What about the report?" You asked knowing that you'd usually have to write one or at least contribute.

Hotch shook his head, "You let me worry about that. You go home and rest, that's an order,"

You laugh, "That might work on these guys but you're not my boss,"

"You're right. But I'll be calling your boss and I'm sure he'll say the same thing,"

"Come on, Tesoro, I'll take you home," Rossi said putting his hand on the small of your back.

"Fine," you folded, allowing Rossi to direct you to the car.

Like a true gentleman, he opened the door for you. Allowing you to use him to get yourself into the car as carefully as possible. You went to put your seat belt on but he stopped you.

"No twisting, remember?" He said as he took it from your hands and reached over you to clip it in.

Of course that did nothing but increase the ache between your thighs. An ache that unfortunately will not be dulled or satisfied in the upcoming future.

"You alright?" He asked as he hear the quickening of your breath.

"You are not helping right now," you snapped. Not meaning to sound as snippy as you did but you needed him near you. In a way you weren't allowed.

"Sorry," He mumbled as he climbed out, shutting the passenger side door behind him. He round the car and got into the driver's seat. Not even shooting you a glance.

"Dave, I'm sor-"

"It's alright. I'm sorry I hurt you,"

"You didn't," you rushed out. He totally got the wrong idea, "Do you have any idea how torturous this week was? All I could think about was seeing you and you touching me which now you cannot do for another 4. Are you not bothered by that?"

"Seriously?" He asked a small smile made its way onto his lips, "you snapped at me because you're horny"

"Yes!" You huffed out, turning your head to scowl at him as he continued laughing, "What aren't you?" He didn't answer just continued laughing even though he did try to stifle his laughter but failed doing so, "What? You got another fuck buddy? That why you're not bothered?"

"You're my one and only, Tesoro," He replied, his laughter had subsided but he still had a smile there. He grabbed your hand and brought it to his lips, "Just you,"

He drove through the relatively quiet streets. The beam from street lights bouncing off the hood as you passed them. His hand only left yours when he used the indicator and it immediately returned back to where it was before, nestled against yours.

There was a silence in the car, a comfortable one. You took this time to just admire him. He still had his vest on, you weren't sure why but in truth, he forgot about it. The only thing on his mind was getting you home and comfortable.

It wasn't long before you pulled to a stop. You tore your eyes from him and looked around. Your eyebrows furrowing as you recognise where you are but it's not where you expected.

Rossi noticed your confusion, "You didn't think I was leaving you on your own did you?" He asked as he undid his seatbelt and got out.

You watched as he made his way to you, your eyes then rested on the building front of you. Not your apartment building. His mansion.

You felt the cool air biting at your skin as he opened your door, "Carefully, Tesoro," He said as he held his arm out for you to hold on to as you slid out the seat.

"Are you sure about this? You don't have to look after me," you told him as his arm instinctively wraps around you gently.

"I know I don't have to, Tesoro. I want to," He said as he shut the door behind you, "Come on, it's cold,"

As you walked up to the front door, you wondered how long it'd be before he got sick of the sight of you. A day? Two? But the days rolled on. Three weeks passed and still you were at his mansion. Still he was taking care of you.

Hotch had kept his word and called Gibbs, who put you on desk duty when you refused to use your vacation time. You may be in pain but you weren't completely useless.

Rossi wasn't thrilled about you going back to work but it somewhat put his mind at ease that you weren't alone whilst he was at work. Throughout the day he'd check on you. Sending you messages asking how you were and how he hoped you were staying out of trouble.

And you were. It was driving you crazy. Just sitting there whilst your team went out, possibly getting shot at. You knew they could handle themselves, they always did. But that didn't ease your mind at all.

You still had at least a week to go. A week of being careful, a week of riding a desk. A week of not touching Rossi. Which was the only bad thing about practically living with him. You absolutely loved the past few weeks. The tenderness, the love. Everything you never thought you'd get with this arrangement. But still you missed him touching you.

You were going crazy. So much so that you thought any longer of this torture would actually land you in a mental facility. It also didn't help that DiNozzo was just asking to get shot. Badgering you day in, day out.

One week later

At this point, you don't care if you're fully healed or not. You are climbing onto your man when you got home.

And that's what you did. Since he was working late, you had Ziva drop you off. You trusted her most to keep a secret. The last thing you needed was Tony finding out.

You were sat in the lounge, just waiting for the front door to open and when it did and you saw him, you were off the couch in seconds and in front of him. Grabbing the lapels of his jacket and pulling him down to your lips. You start backing up, bringing him with you. Up until you were in front of the couch.

You then pull away from the kiss and pushed him back, placing him on the couch. You followed, one leg on either side of his, straddling him. Your lips found his again immediately, his hands instinctively landing on your ass.

He pulled away from the kiss, just enough to say, "Tesoro, you should be taking it easy,"

"It's been a month, Dave," you said attaching your lips back to his, "Don't tell me you're not aching too,"

"But you're-"

"In perfect health," you cut him off. His head fell onto the back of the couch as you begin moving your hips. Your dripping wet center rubbing against the roughness of his jeans.

His head snapped back up and looked down between you, "Are you not wearing underwear under that nightdress?"

You bit your lip and shook your head, "I can't take it anymore. Please touch me," you begged your hips never halting their motion.

"Are you in pain?" He asked seriously. You immediately shook your head, "Words, Baby"

"No, no pain,"

That's all he needed. He picked you up and laid you down on the couch, kneeling between your open legs. Your dress riding up your thigh slightly, almost giving him the view he had misses so much. But not as much as the view of you writhing beneath him in pleasure that you say only he could give you.

He placed one kiss on your lips and then he's gone. Within seconds, you feel fully exposed to the cool air of the room against the wetness between your thighs as he pulls the skirt of your dress all the way up. Two of his fingers place themselves between your lips, stroking lightly. Enough pressure to make you feel something but not enough to make you moan.

It's been weeks. He was going to take his time with you.

He smirked at you as squeeze your thighs shut, trapping his fingers there. You bucked your hips, trying to get more from them.

"So needy," He hummed, his free hand opening up your thighs again.

"Please," you cried, your hand grabbing the wrist of the hand buried where you wanted it but wasn't giving you enough, "I can't take any teasing, please,"

His other hand came to stroke your cheek, "Okay baby," He spoke softly before he dipped his head. His mouth replacing his fingers. Your head fell back as your hands searched wildly for something to grip. Your mouth falling into an o shape as his tongue danced along your soft flesh between your lips.

One hand nestled itself in his hair, the other was gripping the cushion under your head. Leaving small half moon indents behind.

Every so often, his beard tickled your sensitive nub making you jump ever so slightly and your toes curl.

"Shit!" Was just one of the involuntary curses that was pulled from your lips by his actions. His tongue doing dances against your skin and his fingers dipped inside every so often when you least expected it.

He was taking his time with you. Not just to make sure you didn't get hurt but also he was in no rush. You had him all night.

"Oh f-fuck," you gasped as he flattened his tongue, dragging it between your folds slowly. So torturously slow. He groans against you, the vibrations making your eyes roll back slightly.

One of his arms lay across your stomach to stop you from moving, the other nestled under your ass to bring you angling you slightly to get better access.

"Dave," you whimpered, his name barely recognisable through the sound of your pleasure.

His lips wrapped around your clit. His tongue circling it in the the most beautifully pleasurable way.

Your hips jolted. As much as they could under the hold he had on your stomach. His other hand comes from under your ass to grip your right thigh, moving it further from your other leg to have even more access to you.

"Fuck, fuck.. d-don't stop," you gasped out, trying and failing to roll your hips against his mouth to get that feeling you've been craving for months, "I'm so close,"

He groaned against you in response, the feeling once again making your eyes roll but also has you grabbing the arm rest above your head. Nails digging into the fabric so hard that if your mind wasn't mush right now, you'd be worried about ruining it. Your back arched, chest rising to the ceiling above. Your other hand buried in his hair as your body convulsed wildly against his mouth. The movements inviting your impending orgasm in.

"Dave, oh my God," you cried, your hips bucking as he loosens the hold on your stomach. Grinding against his tongue desperately until his name was the only thing you could say.

He kept going. Gently licking as your body vibrated with blinding pleasure. Your body below him twitches as he moves away from your clit, placing soft kisses to your thigh as you come down from your high.

After a few moments, you caught your breath and you look down at him. You hand moves from his hair to his chin, pulling slightly and indicating that you wanted him face to face. He followed your hand until your eyes were level and placed kiss on your lips. You return the kiss eagerly ad your hands move down to his belt.

"Off" was all you said. The warmth and weight of his body disappears as he stands to remove his pants and boxers. The offending items of clothing pool at his ankles before being tossed aside somewhere. You bit your lip as you look at him, "now come here"

He didn't need to be told twice. He knelt between your open legs, returning to his previous position. He kissed you. Slowly. Lovingly. Something you would do with a wife or girlfriend and not a casual fuck buddy. He pulled away and his eyes conveyed the same message as his kiss. But we're you seeing things? Was this just a post bliss haze and you were imagining things?

As if reading your mind, he utters three words you never thought you'd hear from his lips

I love you

For a moment you froze. Did he say that? You've dreamt of that for months. When you didn't answer, his mood started to change. And then you realise he really did say it and you had said fuck all back. You dumb bitch he probably thinks you don't feel the same. Say something.

"I love you too,"

"Really?" He asked, not quite believing you but then again the whole thing was still unbelievable to him.

"I have ages now. More so this past month. You know since we couldn't fuck and you insisted on taking care of me,"

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"Because we had an agreement," you replied with a shrug, "How come you didn't say anything?"

"And scare off the beautiful girl who wants to have sex with me?" He asked in a tone as if it was obvious. In a way, that was also why you didn't say anything. He was just so good.

You huffed out a laugh, "idiot"

"You love it," He said with a smug grin as he lowered his head to capture your lips. Again lovingly kissing you. You melt into the kiss. Perfectly content in the moment when you feel something glide between your folds.

You gasp into his mouth, still a bit sensitive from your orgasm. But you love it. Your hand moves to cup his cheek as the kiss deepens. Both of you pouring every feeling you've felt for the other. His hips didn't still though. Every so often, his tip would rub against your clit, making you jump slightly. His cock getting more and more soaked by your juices as he continued his movements.

You smile into the kiss as you wrap your legs around his waist. The new angle causing him to slip easily inside you. He pulls away and looks at you but you just smile innocently back at him. But he of course doesn't fall for it.

Slowly inch by inch, he continues to push into you until he bottomed out. You gasp as your walls expand your accommodate him.

"Jesus baby..." the words caught in his throat as he begins to pull out slightly before easing back in.

He continued his thrusts. They were different from any other time he'd fucked you but when you looked into his eyes and when he kisses your forehead, you realised that he wasn't fucking you. He was making love to you.

You kissed him again, your hands moving to his shirt buttons to unfasten them. Desperate to feel every part of him. His skin against yours. You tore it from his frame and chucked it with the rest of his clothes. You then went to pull your night dress off. With some slight manoeuvring that wouldn't stop Dave's movements. He helped, your lips only parting to pull the silky garment over your head. That too joins the pile.

His thrusts remain soft and tender. Which he intends to maintain. Well until you did the one thing that drives him insane.

You clenched.

He pulled away from your lips, his head dropping to your neck, "Fuck baby,"

"What?" You asked innocently.

He lifted his head to scowl at you, "You know what,"

You did it again. A giggle leaving your lips as another groan fell from his.

His trusts started stuttering as he tries to restrain himself. But that's the last thing you want him to do. So you clenched again, watching as the last bit of restraint he had dissolves into nothing.

Gone were the soft and tender thrusts. Replaced with the kind of feral need the two of you both had been feeling the past month.

The sound that left your throat was a nothing more than a broken cry as the sudden roughness took you by surprise despite being the cause of it.

One of his hands rest on the cushion beside your head, steadying himself as the other was on your on your hip, pulling your body towards him to meet his thrusts.

Your nails dig into his back, for sure leaving behind a red trail in their wake. Your legs tremble as he drives into you, fucking you into the couch cushions below you, you thought there might be a permanent indent.

His head drops to your neck again, his teeth grazing your soft skin slightly.

You could feel it suddenly. The dam about to crack as your orgasm fast approached. He noticed this because of course he did. His hand leaves your hip, moving between your bodies and landed on your clit. His rough pads made circles as his thrusts continued and the combination caused the dam to shatter into pieces. Setting free your second orgasm.

Your body locked around him. Your legs and arms tightening their hold like a snake trying to squeeze the life out of something. He followed shortly after, a choked groan leaving his lips as his hips stuttered. He buried himself deep inside you, holding you tight as he came.

You could feel his hot breath on your neck as he tries to calm it.

"You good there, old man?" You asked kissing his shoulder.

His head rose from your neck, "old man?" He questioned. You shrugged and attempted your innocent smile again even though it never works on him, "calm me old man again and you'll be walking funny for a week,"

You thought about the things he'd do to you to follow through on that promise because that was indeed what it was.

"Okay," you said defeated.

"Come on," He said standing up, "I'll run you a bath,"

You took his hand and stood, pressing a kiss to his lips before walking away, "Okay, old man" you said before breaking into a run upstairs towards the bedroom because let's face it. That's where you're gonna end up anyway.

"Get back here," you heard echo behind you and all you could do was giggle in anticipation of what he's gonna do to you.

You weren't supposed to fall for him, but you did. And so did he. Neither of you had upheld the agreement you set that night and you couldn't be happier.

[A/N] I'm sorry for the delay. The last time I posted about this fic, shortly after I realised that the upcoming week was an anniversary and I was so depressed. I also had the flu which didn't help either.

The only thing you could hear was your own panting breath and the soft sound of his hips connecting with yours as he buried himself into you over and over again. You could barely think straight, one hand gripping his sheets and the other holding onto him for dear life. A little while ago, the two of you were out with the team for drinks after a case, and Hotch could tell you weren’t really feeling it. He’d offered to give you a ride home, and somewhere along the way you’d rerouted to his for a nightcap. Neither of you were particularly drunk, but you were thankful for the liquid confidence (and his) when he made the first move. He’d asked repeatedly if it was okay and if you’d wanted him to stop, knowing that he was your boss and that you knew he’d just finalized his divorce from Haley. You seemed to notice his flirting (that Emily and Derek continually pointed out to you, no matter how many times you’d brushed them off and said they were seeing something that wasn’t there) a little bit when him and Haley were separating, but you’d never ever think he was actually attracted to you, let alone to the point where he’d want to sleep with you, and yet…

The feeling of him inside you was more than you could have ever fantasized about (and you did fantasize about it). Not only did he take his time devouring you first, making you come twice with his mouth and fingers, but he made sure you were well enough aroused to be in nothing but total ecstasy when he was ready to fuck you. Every single stroke felt so fucking good. He was perfect. Well… perfectly sized for pleasure. Great in bed. Not perfect. Not… whatever.

“H-Holy… shit, Hotch…” your eyes screwed shut and your jaw fell slack as you heard him chuckle and groan.

“I think… we’re at the point where you can… call me Aaron, darling… don’t you think?” his pace slowed a bit, truthfully because he was close and didn’t want to be finished just yet, but he wanted to give you a moment to respond to him.

You opened your eyes and found his. God, what a dangerous moment. The look is his eye as he lazily fucked into you wasnt anything you could have prepared yourself for. You tried avoiding eye contact this whole time, and you were almost successful. You knew what would happen if you held his gaze, and here you were. You knew you’d be confronted with thoughts that you’d been successfully suppressing for a long while now, thoughts you’d only let brew when you allowed yourself to think about your boss in a way that you knew you had no right to, especially because they began well before he was even separated from his now ex-wife. The desire to open up to him right now about how you feel was right on your tongue. You wanted to tell him how sexy he looked with his hair all messed up, especially from your fingers running through and pulling it as he ate you out. You wanted so badly to tell him that his face looks much better being flushed from sex rather than being flushed from your typical daily compliments. Dare you tell him that you think you love him? What a stupid, stupid idea. You decided that it’s definitely best not to say anything, maybe ever, and just respond to what he asked you.

“Are you…” you stopped to sigh, the pleasure was still too much and you wanted to last for him, “… are you sure?”

You watched his eyes half-lid as he brought your right leg to rest on his shoulder. He leaned down to you further, allowing himself a new angle to thrust into you. His pace picked up again, and this time, you saw fucking stars. You tried, but couldn’t help the loud sound of your pleasure escape from your throat. You’ve never been fucked like this, and you knew he could probably tell, which you decided you’d curse yourself for later.

You could feel the air from his lips as he spoke right next to your ear, “Does it feel like I’m sure, Y/N?”

You nodded quickly, your arms now coming around him under his arms to hold on to his back, surely leaving marks with your nails. “Y-Yes… God Aaron, yes.”

You couldn’t help but notice that he seemed to be affected by your use of his first name, responding with only a low and breathy moan. He drove you so close to your third orgasm, and you could tell he was close too. His name fell from your lips again as you tried to speak, “I’m… Aaron I-I think I’m gonna..”

He panted and kept his pace, “I’ve got you, sweetheart, g-give it to me.”

The moment that your orgasm hit you nearly blinded you for a few seconds. The brightness of the pleasure your body felt was something you were sure was once in a lifetime. It affected your entire body, legs now shaking and back arched against the mattress. The pleasure kept coming as Aaron thrust into you. You didn’t even hear yourself nearly weep as you came, your pussy contracting strongly around Aaron’s rigid cock.

“That’s it, that’s a good… good girl,” Aaron stuttered as he followed close behind you with his own peak. His thrusts became sloppy, still trying to ride you through your high, as he drove into you once more with a loud groan. You whimpered as you came down, still feeling yourself ebb through pleasure as Aaron stayed inside you. The two of you breathed heavily together, locked eyes as Aaron smiled lazily at you. Goddammit. You were so fucked. Fucked.

He gestured toward your leg on his shoulder, silently asking for permission to move you so he could adjust and start to clean himself up. You nodded, trying not to make a sound as his cock left you. You didn’t think you were quite ready to move yet, but you tried to at least scooch yourself up by your elbows to begin coming back to reality.

Aaron stood, taking off the condom while making his way toward the bathroom in his bedroom. You watched him, getting a more normal view of his naked body, and for some reason you felt guilty for looking.

You shook your head, pushing the feeling away as you looked for your clothes on the floor. As you sat up, Aaron came out of the bathroom and grabbed a pair of sweats to put on. You stood, “Do you mind if I…” you gestured toward the bathroom asking silently.

Aaron smiled again, “Of course not, whatever you need. I have extra toothbrushes in the bottom right drawer,” he began walking toward the door with you, showing you, “If you want to shower, I have extra towels here.”

You nodded, deciding that would probably be a good idea. Smiling at him, you thanked him. He held your gaze, brushing your hair behind your ear, and leaned down to kiss you. It was brief, but surprising. He pulled away from you with a goofy looking smirk on his face, leaving you in the bathroom.

-

After your shower, you left the bathroom in a towel, and found your clothes folded nicely on the armchair in the corner of the bedroom. Aaron was in bed, reading glasses on, looking at a file by the light of his bedside table lamp. He looked up to you as you emerged, but you’d already made your way to the pile of clothes and started to get dressed.

“You can borrow something of mine to sleep in, if you need,” he said. You could tell this was his way of asking the question, ‘are you staying?’ and you weren’t sure what your response should be. Obviously he wouldn’t have framed it that way if he didn’t want you to stay, but did he feel obligated to offer? You knew you didn’t really have time to think about it, so you decided not to.

“I think I’m going to call an uber back to my place, actually. I’ve got some things to take care of pretty early tomorrow.”

Aaron was very good at his job. Aaron could absolutely tell that you probably don’t have something to do tomorrow that early, and that you don’t want to stay over. You hope he can also tell that it’s not necessarily because you don’t want to, but because you aren’t 100% comfortable yet, even if you don’t get a chance to become comfortable.

He set down his file and stood, “Let me drive you, don’t pay for an uber.” He made his way to grab a t-shirt and slipped on comfortable slipper-like shoes to wear in the car.

“Are you sure? I don’t mind getting an uber, Aaron, I don’t want to make you leave just to drive me home.”

Grabbing a jacket from his closet, he shrugged it on and walked over toward you. Without warning, he leaned down to your ear, delicately pushing your hair on the opposite side over your shoulder and caging you in with his hand then on the wall behind you, “Does it feel like I’m sure… Y/N?” he smiled at you slyly as he pushed himself off of the wall and walked past you out of the bedroom. You felt heat rise in your tummy and cheeks as you sighed and shook your head. What the hell were you getting yourself into? Following him, you grabbed your bag, slipped on your coat and shoes, and followed him to the car.

-

The short drive to your apartment was overall quiet, but as you were turning the corner onto your street, you knew you had to start the conversation. “Sorry for not staying the night… to be completely honest I wasn’t expecting you to offer.”

Aaron shifted to lean on the center console and nodded, “It’s alright, I know that tonight’s events overall seemed a bit unexpected. Hopefully you’re not dissapointed, though.” You turned to him, noticing the cocky smirk on his lips. Asshole.

You rolled your eyes and he laughed. There was a beat of silence before you spoke again. “Are we… do you want to just act as if nothing happened tonight? At work, I mean… and outside of work if that’s what you want.”

You wanted to smack yourself in the face for letting your thoughts out so freely. Your anxiety surrounding this part of the situation definitely was getting the better of you, and you weren’t sure what he wanted, which made things so much worse. As the car slowed in front of your building, Aaron put the car in park as you waited for his response. You knew he was thinking about what he wanted to say, which obviously made you even more nervous.

“Y/N, I know you realize that… this is a slightly complicated situation.” You nodded, urging him to continue, “I need you to understand that since Haley and I separated… it’s taken a lot of my own will power to keep myself from you.”

Everyone on the team knew that one of its strongest members was its leader, Aaron Hotchner. Hearing him confess that he’s had a hard time keeping himself away from you was a statement you could never have expected. You knew he was flirtatious toward you, no matter how much you denied it to yourself. You knew he was soft for you, you knew he favored you in appropriate ways, and you knew that the team noticed. You just wished that you let yourself see it. Maybe you’d have to start, that is, if he wanted you to.

“I… I loved and still have love for Haley, she is the mother of my son and the woman that I thought I would love for my entire life. Coming to terms with that not being the case has been hard. I would do anything for Jack, you know that. I don’t mean to tell you things you already know, but while things are still being worked out custody wise, and while we work out a way to tell the team and… Strauss, I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to pursue you publicly. I need you, though, to understand that I want to when I can, if you’ll let me… and that I’d like to continue to see you privately, if that’s something you want.” Another beat of silence, “I like you… more than I should, more than I care to admit to myself. I think about you, I want to be around you when I can be. I… want you.”

You nodded, trying to hide a smile. “May I speak freely, sir?”

Something in his eyes seemed to darken at the formality, “You may, agent.”

“I want you, I have for a long time. I would really like to continue… whatever this is, whatever you want this to be, however you want to.”

The lustful look in Aaron’s eye turned briefly into fondness, you believe, if you caught it right. He reached for your hand and gave it a light squeeze, “I know this isn’t ideal for you, and I know it will be hard to keep this from the team. Are you sure?”

You adjusted yourself to lean into him and kiss him unexpectedly with fervor, a kiss that made him brace himself on the steering wheel and grasp the back of your head for reassurance. He grunted as you leaned him further back, returning the kiss so fiercely that you had half a mind to ask him inside with you.