Criminal minds but itâs an adult swim show no one can remember

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Criminal minds but itâs an adult swim show no one can remember

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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âI asked chatgptââ Iâm gonna stop you right there pal because I asked Penelope Garcia and she said youâre a whiny little bitch loser and weâre all laughing at you <3
the team is chasing the sickest murderers to ever live meanwhile these two on the phone sexually harassing each other
CRIMINAL MINDS 2.21 â "Open Season"

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IN WHICH spencer proudly shows off his wife at the BAU
๨ŕ§âËŕż âthatâs my girlfriend, suckersâ/âmy wife, even betterâ
the case was tiring. it was a long, exhausting day of sitting around the briefing room with the rest of the team. you were trying to stay awake, observing emily who was sitting at her usual spot next to you, and penelope on your left. frantically tapped on her keyboard.
all of you were racking your brains as you went over the documents for what felt like the hundredth time. but thanks to you, after a couple of hours and coffee refills, it was finally done.
you did it. you cracked the code. you saw the tiny detail no one did, causing everyone to finally let out a relieved breath when you explained your much plausible hypothesis.
âi donât know what weâd do without you, pretty girlâ said derek when you finished rambling, allowing himself to stretch out his arms to release the pent up tension.
you just smiled, and spencerâs eyes locked with yours from the other side of the room. he was grinning goofily, dimples showing. surprisingly, he wasnât even slightly disappointed by the fact that he wasnât the one to solve the case this time.
instead, he cheered happily, his hand fixing his tousled hair âthatâs my girlfriend, suckers !â
but the thin silver band around your finger reflected the sunlight streaming in the room as you put the files down, like a reminder to him and everyone else.
the whole team rolled their eyes, and you didnât miss their shared amused glances, aw well as the way rossi rolled his eyes. if noticing your sickeningly sweet behaviour had been fun when you two began dating, it was now a common occurrence for all your colleagues.
âyour wife, spencer.â
he looked around, chuckling to himself at your correction, before a smile creeped up his face.
âmy wife, even better !â
His Hoodie
Pairing: Spencer Reid x femaleBAU!readerÂ
A/N: Cooked this up rq so it probably sucks, but I hope you enjoy it! Please like, repost, and follow if youâd like to see more like this!Â
Word count: 1.2kÂ
Warnings: Not an ounce of proof-reading, Mentions of killers and wounds (not much), fluffÂ
Summary: Hard launching to the team by accident. You wear his hoodie on the jet plane back after an exhausting mission, and everyone notices.Â
After a long case that managed to drag out for an entire week, the team was finally returning to their home, Quantico. The case of a serial killer targeting teenage girls. A 15-year-old girl was kidnapped, and the team raced against the clock to find her.
It was a hard case for you; you saw yourself in her. She was involved in the same things you were in high school. She was a good kid who went through a lot, and you knew all what that was like.Â
You barely slept the whole case, constantly brewing new coffee to stay awake. If you did get any sleep, it was because you slipped into consciousness while working in the police station.Â
Youâd eventually wake up on the office couch with a blanket draped over you. You obviously knew exactly who was taking care of you, but for the sake of HR and your job, you had to feign ignorance.Â
No one could know about you and Reid.Â
You loved him, you truly did. He was everything a woman could ask for. Between his nerdy facts and his cute face, you were down horrifically.Â
No matter how much you loved him, you knew that as a female agent, you would never receive respect if you were dating a male coworker. People would assume you slept your way into your position. They would overlook the countless hours and dedication you put into your job.Â
You werenât willing to sacrifice that, so you and Reid came to a mutual decision to keep your relationship a secret.
It was hard, but it was important. You couldnât risk your relationship distracting you or getting in the way of your job.Â
Eventually, after grueling 16-hour days working to find her, Penelope managed to find where he was hiding her. The girl narrowly survived, with deep gashes and cuts from the killer's relentless torture.Â
You knew this case would haunt you. It wasnât abnormal for you to have nightmares about the worst ones. They wouldnât go away, but after time they became manageable. The insomnia wasnât so bad anyway; you actually managed to get stuff done during the night.Â
The times when you were able to fall asleep were few and far between.Â
Hotch noticedâ hell, the whole team didâ but the BAU isnât exactly known for its compliance. There wasnât anything they could do except encourage you to sleep. You wouldnât listen; itâs not like you could control the nightmares, they just came to you.Â
Soon enough, the team was boarding the jet and setting off for home.Â
One by one, the team shoved their bags underneath the plane into the storage compartment. Morgan, ever the gentleman, usually took the womenâs bags for them and tossed them along with the others.Â
Each member boarded the plane, walking up the steep steps of the plane stairs. Inside, Hotch looked around.Â
âWhereâs Y/n?â
The team really hadnât noticed you were missing. Not because they didnât care, but because they were so exhausted they could barely keep their eyes open.Â
Except Reid, of course. He was extremely aware you werenât on the plane, but he feared that if he was the only one to bring up your disappearance, it would look suspicious. He knew Hotch would notice eventually, so he stayed quiet.Â
The team glanced around the room, looking for you before deciding you were absent from the plane.Â
âHuh.. Thatâs unusual. Sheâs always earlyâ, Morgan stated. He reached into his back pocket where his phone rested, pressing each number until he was ready to dial your cell phone.Â
Just as he was pressing the last number, the stairs thumped frantically.Â
Hotch grabbed his gun on his belt, not drawing it, but ready in the case of an emergency.Â
But it wasnât an emergency; it was you. Your hair was a mess, and your makeup from yesterday smudged on your face. You wore fluffy pajama pants, slippers, and a large oversized drawstring hoodie.Â
The team glanced over you. You looked horrid, but that wasnât what they were concerned with. They werenât looking at your slippers, or your bright pink Hello Kitty pajama pants, or even your extremely messy hair.  They were focused on your hoodie, the one they were all too familiar with. It didnât belong to you. It belonged to Dr.Spencer Reid.Â
Emilyâs mouth dropped open, immediately panning to Spencer, who wore a pink blush on his face, before turning to JJ and Morgan, who were both looking at each other already. Hotch and Rossi glanced at each other, with a smile on Rossiâs face while Hotch wore his same old stone-cold face.Â
You were confused as to why JJ, Emily, and Morgan were giggling. Even more so, why Rossi was smiling at your appearance. You knew you looked a mess, but you didnât look that bad.Â
JJ turned back to face Rossi, âSo how many weeks is it?âÂ
â10 weeks,â He replied, still wearing his smile.Â
âDammit,â Morgan and Emily said in unison while reaching into their pockets for their wallets.Â
âI really thought I had this one,â Morgan muttered while pulling out a crisp $100 bill and handing it back to Rossi, Emily doing the same.Â
You looked at the scene in front of you in utter confusion.Â
âCan someone explain whatâs happening?â you awkwardly laughed, trying to make sense of the situation.
âUhm.. It appears youâre still wearing my hoodie⌠and now the team knows. It also seems that theyâve made bets on how long it took us to slip up and reveal ourselves. I actually considered the possibility that this would happen, but it seemed quite slim. I shouldâve known, considering it depended on an extremely large number of variablesâ, he rambled, blush remaining on his face.Â
âOhâ, you said, walking slowly and finally slumping into a seat with a loud thump.Â
After a minute, the giggles quieted down, and the team started picking their seats.Â
As Emily passed you, she whispered in your ear, âCongratulations, youâll tell the girls all the details later at girls' night, right? I want to know everything.â She giggled as she walked away.Â
You knew she was joking, but your face went red, and you buried your face in your hands.Â
Spencer took his seat next to you, pulling out a book as he began telling you facts about the author.Â
âFor as profound as Dostoevsky is, he actually only wrote to pay off his financial debts. He suffered from a gambling addiction. In fact, he wrote it in only twenty-six days, which is only five days slower than Jack Kerouac wrote when working on âOn the Roadâ.âHe rambled on about Dostoevsky.Â
It obviously wasnât his first time reading Crime and Punishment, but it was one of his favorites, and he often re-read it for enjoyment. He had an eidetic memory, so re-reading them wasnât really necessary, but he enjoyed it nonetheless.Â
Hotch watched the two of you. Studying how you interacted and how you treated him. Reid was like his son, and he cared deeply about how he was treated, even if Hotch sometimes failed to treat him right.Â
When Reid eventually quieted down and became focused on his reading, Hotch looked at you from across the table.Â
âJust make sure to report it to HRâ, He stated. It was the most approval you would ever get out of Hotch without him saying it directly.Â
So maybe dating a federal agent wouldnât turn out to be so detrimental to your career.Â
You leaned on Reidâs shoulder as he read. Snuggled in his hoodie and resting on him, you managed to fall asleep.Â
Safe to say, that was the best sleep you had in over a month.Â
A/N: Please like, repost, or follow if you liked this and want to see more!! My requests are always open! <3
jj: you're the best. penelope: i know. jj: no, i mean.. friend. you're the best friend.