if at first you don't succeed.

New pageant princess making her way into the tags and into your heart!

From this point on, Grace had no idea what to expect. As she had debated coming here in the first place, there was never any idea as to how the night would play out, and there was some sort of thrill in that. She knew one thing, and that was that she wasn’t going to let things get out of hand. In the past, they had rushed to sex, and maybe that was mostly her fault. But this wasn’t going to be like that. This was going to be about them, getting to know each other like they should have done long ago. “Whoa,” she began, shooting a look at Katie. “It’s not that I felt pressured. It’s that I didn’t want to say it just because you were asking me to say it. It should be on my own terms, when you’re not expecting it.. so you know I mean it. And maybe that’s what tonight was..” she trailed off, letting out a small sigh. Her hand allowed Katie’s to hold it, and she gave it a small squeeze as she accepted the offer. Following her lead, she shoved her shoes off as well, realizing just then that this was really her opening.

Ignoring her words, she shook her head. “You had to,” she spat. They were the same words Katie had used so many times in the past. She had to leave. Sure, physically she did have to leave, but emotionally there was no means to, at least not in Grace’s eyes. “But?” she questioned, her eyes moving back towards Katie’s. She waited for her to finish, ignoring her apology. But as she went on, she looked away again. “I’m not strong. I couldn’t even tell you how I feel. Are you kidding me?” she asked, wondering if she was just speaking to speak because she knew they were both well aware that Grace was no where near strong, even if she had never wanted to admit it. 

Ideally, her gaze maintained on the floor. Her brows furrowed as she soaked up everything Grace had to say. It was mind boggling at best. “What?” Only then did her head turn to face the younger girl. Her confused expression was still mounted on her ivory features. “Those are just words,” she spoke softly, “You did the hardest part. You didn't run. No matter how many times you should have, you didn't. I'm the one that ran. I couldn't get out of town fast enough.” Her head shook obstinately, and her voice raised a few notches. Her tone wasn't of malice or anger, not with Grace at least. If she felt either it was all for her own downfall. Her inability to simply live her life on her own accord. That was one of the many things she envied about the sixteen year old. Despite the age difference, she'd already learned to not let the opinions of others dictate how she lived her life. It was only in that small fragment of time that Katie was willing to allow herself that small liberty.

Her head continued to shake as her frustrations continued to flourish. “I always too much, but not you. You're this pillar of everything I wish I could be. I mean you're--,” Promptly, she found herself almost bringing up the other girl's age, but she decided better. Knowing all too well of the trouble she'd get herself into, she bit it back. “You don't care about what anyone thinks about you. You don't care about others finding out. And I-- I still care.” Swallowing hard, she then released her hold Grace's hand. A raging guilt lingered above her, and right away she didn't feel worthy enough to even be holding her hand. She didn't want to care, but a part of her would probably always feel that way. 

Rules: If you reblog, have the common decency to request at least one before reblogging. Send me a word (or a few words) and I’ll write something about our characters doing stuff together.

Rain — I’ll write a fluffy drabble of our characters kissing in the rain. 

Kill — I’ll write a angst drabble of my character violently killing yours. 

Love — I’ll write a drabble of my character admitting they love yours.

Lust — I’ll write a drabble of our characters making love together.

Date — I’ll write a drabble of my character taking yours out on a date.  

Defend — I’ll write a drabble of my character protecting yours.

Fight — I’ll write a drabble of my character fighting with/against yours.

Death — I’ll write a drabble of my character with yours on their deathbed.

Mourn — I’ll write a drabble of my character mourning yours.

Pet — I’ll write a drabble of my character buying yours a pet. (specify what kind.)

Wash — I’ll write a drabble of our characters showering/bathing together.

Pool — I’ll write a drabble of our characters swimming together.

Beach — I’ll write a drabble of out characters at the beach together.

Sing — I’ll write a drabble of my character singing to yours.

Snow — I’ll write a drabble of our characters building a snowman together.

Game — I’ll write a drabble of my character playing videogames with yours.

Movie — I’ll write a drabble of our characters watching a movie together.

Shop — I’ll write a drabble of my character taking yours shopping.

Cook — I’ll write a drabble of our characters cooking together.

"No," Grace responded instantly, letting out a sigh. "I mean, I want to hear everything. Talk to me. Let’s.. yeah, talk, and stuff?" she said in a confused manner herself, laughing a bit as she processed her own words. "Talk. Let’s try that for once. Without yelling or arguing. I want to catch up. It’s been too long." She knew this would come as a shock to Katie, but she really did want to make an effort to fix things between them. She had to if she wanted to be in Katie’s life at all. It couldn’t just be about sex and constant fights anymore, and she wouldn’t let it be. As they walked through the halls, Grace kept her eyes straight ahead, not particularly wanting to catch eye contact with any of the college students around. Her arm adjusted to be  pulled by Katie, and a small smile crept onto her face. Still, she had no worry about what others thought, especially knowing she wouldn’t ever have any contact with these people. She just hoped Katie knew what she was doing. 

Hearing her question, Grace stared blankly back at Katie. “I… that’s a good question,” she finally mused, shrugging her shoulders. She hadn’t even expected to pick up that phone, but she wasn’t going to admit that to Katie. “Impulsive isn’t me?” Grace asked, a playful, offended look across her face. “I take offense to that,” she chuckled, joining her on the bed. Turning towards her, she shrugged again. “I couldn’t wait a day longer. I needed you to know. I should’ve told you a long time ago, though.. when you were here..” Her words trailed off as she turned away, finally taking in the walls of Katie’s dorm room. Only then did it dawn on her that Katie really was much older than her, and she was living a completely different life than Grace was.

When they were finally in her room, she'd made herself comfortable. Any reservations she had were hard to come by as of now. The commotion of her fellow students could be heard, but none of them were any wiser about just what was transpiring mere feet from them. Behind the closed door, she was left a moment to breathe. Her bright azure hues lit up just a bit upon Grace joining her. Sighing, she knew that the shorter girl wasn't the only one that brought about their downfall. Hearing her speak, she couldn't let her take that on herself entirely. “I didn't really make it easy, though. And I should have never made you feel pressured into something that you clearly weren't ready for...” Taking another deep breath, she lazily reached for Grace's hand. Idly lacing their fingers together, she averted her gaze to the cold tiles beneath them. Kicking her sneakers off, she made herself even more comfortable.

Maintaining her sights on the floor, she wondered if she should just keep quiet. Or she could even let things unfold between them as they would. Clothes would be on the floor in no time, but this was a new era for the both of them. “I feel like I can't say this enough, but I am sorry for leaving you. Last time and even this. I could have fought, I should have but--,” she slumped her shoulders just a bit, tightening her grasp on Grace's hand. “I'm sorry...” A mixture of relief and self disappointment was released in a faint laugh. “I'm just glad you're here now. You were always the stronger of us...” Shaking her head, she realized she was saying way too much. Not wanting to come on too strong, she stopped speaking immediately.