You Know What To Do, Do It With Style @thedemon-crowley - Tumblr Blog

//Formerly @ infernal-inquiries//

If you want info about upstairs, get in touch with @theangel-aziraphale. You can, er, you can talk to him about me now…

//formerly @ ineffable-asks//

#//minor rebrand #crowleyposting #go crowley #crowley ask blog #good omens #good omens askblog #good omens asks #go aziraphale #it's ineffable #ineffable husbands #ineffable partners

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thedemon-crowley

*Sneaking into the "traitor's" house really ought to warrant being quiet, or at least sneaky. Unfortunately, @shax-attacx is rather one track mind right now, and is being neither quiet nor sneaky.

(The pink note was slipped amongst the plants by Eric earlier, shh!)*

*Crowley appears in the doorway, armed with a plant mister*

What are you doing here?! I thought you were lurking outside the bookshop!

shax-attacx

*She jumps, keeping a very close eye on that plant mister.*

I'm - on an assignment. Yeah. That. This is for work. I still have to do my job. Where are you plants?

thedemon-crowley

*He narrows his eyes*

Wouldn’t you like to know? I wasn’t born yesterday - tell me why you’re actually here!

shax-attacx

*She hesitates for a moment, looking around as if making sure no one else is there.*

This is - technically - an assignment. Just... not for work.

*She pulls out the two notes, both on pink paper, stamped with the King's sigil, and scented with her perfume.*

thedemon-crowley

*He looks at them for a while and sighs before handing them back*

If anyone asks, I wasn’t home, alright? You didn’t see me, this conversation never happened. Agree? *He holds his free hand out to shake*

shax-attacx

Agreed.

*She shakes his hand, before putting the notes away.*

Seriously, though, where are your plants? She mentioned them, or at least, I assume that's what "the Serpent's Eden" means.

thedemon-crowley

Come with me.

*he motions for her to follow and heads towards the plant room*

I have to say…seems terribly out of character for Abigail, all this…

*There. Not quite interrupting the prank in any meaningful way, but not saying nothing either!*

shax-attacx

*She follows him through his flat.*

Well, perhaps she is trying something new. Or maybe you don't know her as well as you think.

*It's rather easy to spot the bright pink paper amidst all the greenery, and she snatches up the third note quickly.*

thedemon-crowley

*He looks at her VERY POINTEDLY over his sunglasses*

I highly doubt that. But *shrug* it’s your funeral.

*He goes about misting his plants and looking disinterested*

What does it say then?

shax-attacx

*She opens the note, reading over it, blushing, and then showing it to Crowley.

In neat, curly writing is the following note:*

"Now, dear, I must ask you to instead head to the safest place there is; get to the home of your ruler, and do so promptly."

thedemon-crowley

*He scoffs*

I refuse to believe Abigail would write that. I don’t know what you’re getting all giddy for, I really have my doubts.

shax-attacx

It has her sigil. And it's her handwriting. Who else could it possibly be?

thedemon-crowley

*He holds his hands up, shrugging*

Forgery is popular in Hell, you know this. Anyway, it’s not my business. Frankly, I just want you to get out of my flat and away from the bookshop. It’s like having a demonic chaperone.

shax-attacx

The King’s sigil can not be forged. And who would be stupid enough to forge her writing?

I'm leaving, now, I'll be out of your stupid hair before you even notice. Hmph.

thedemon-crowley

*He makes a face and half-heartedly sprays her with water*

Piss off, then. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

thedemon-crowley

*Sneaking into the "traitor's" house really ought to warrant being quiet, or at least sneaky. Unfortunately, @shax-attacx is rather one track mind right now, and is being neither quiet nor sneaky.

(The pink note was slipped amongst the plants by Eric earlier, shh!)*

*Crowley appears in the doorway, armed with a plant mister*

What are you doing here?! I thought you were lurking outside the bookshop!

shax-attacx

*She jumps, keeping a very close eye on that plant mister.*

I'm - on an assignment. Yeah. That. This is for work. I still have to do my job. Where are you plants?

thedemon-crowley

*He narrows his eyes*

Wouldn’t you like to know? I wasn’t born yesterday - tell me why you’re actually here!

shax-attacx

*She hesitates for a moment, looking around as if making sure no one else is there.*

This is - technically - an assignment. Just... not for work.

*She pulls out the two notes, both on pink paper, stamped with the King's sigil, and scented with her perfume.*

thedemon-crowley

*He looks at them for a while and sighs before handing them back*

If anyone asks, I wasn’t home, alright? You didn’t see me, this conversation never happened. Agree? *He holds his free hand out to shake*

shax-attacx

Agreed.

*She shakes his hand, before putting the notes away.*

Seriously, though, where are your plants? She mentioned them, or at least, I assume that's what "the Serpent's Eden" means.

thedemon-crowley

Come with me.

*he motions for her to follow and heads towards the plant room*

I have to say…seems terribly out of character for Abigail, all this…

*There. Not quite interrupting the prank in any meaningful way, but not saying nothing either!*

shax-attacx

*She follows him through his flat.*

Well, perhaps she is trying something new. Or maybe you don't know her as well as you think.

*It's rather easy to spot the bright pink paper amidst all the greenery, and she snatches up the third note quickly.*

thedemon-crowley

*He looks at her VERY POINTEDLY over his sunglasses*

I highly doubt that. But *shrug* it’s your funeral.

*He goes about misting his plants and looking disinterested*

What does it say then?

shax-attacx

*She opens the note, reading over it, blushing, and then showing it to Crowley.

In neat, curly writing is the following note:*

"Now, dear, I must ask you to instead head to the safest place there is; get to the home of your ruler, and do so promptly."

thedemon-crowley

*He scoffs*

I refuse to believe Abigail would write that. I don’t know what you’re getting all giddy for, I really have my doubts.

shax-attacx

It has her sigil. And it's her handwriting. Who else could it possibly be?

thedemon-crowley

*He holds his hands up, shrugging*

Forgery is popular in Hell, you know this. Anyway, it’s not my business. Frankly, I just want you to get out of my flat and away from the bookshop. It’s like having a demonic chaperone.

thedemon-crowley

*Sneaking into the "traitor's" house really ought to warrant being quiet, or at least sneaky. Unfortunately, @shax-attacx is rather one track mind right now, and is being neither quiet nor sneaky.

(The pink note was slipped amongst the plants by Eric earlier, shh!)*

*Crowley appears in the doorway, armed with a plant mister*

What are you doing here?! I thought you were lurking outside the bookshop!

shax-attacx

*She jumps, keeping a very close eye on that plant mister.*

I'm - on an assignment. Yeah. That. This is for work. I still have to do my job. Where are you plants?

thedemon-crowley

*He narrows his eyes*

Wouldn’t you like to know? I wasn’t born yesterday - tell me why you’re actually here!

shax-attacx

*She hesitates for a moment, looking around as if making sure no one else is there.*

This is - technically - an assignment. Just... not for work.

*She pulls out the two notes, both on pink paper, stamped with the King's sigil, and scented with her perfume.*

thedemon-crowley

*He looks at them for a while and sighs before handing them back*

If anyone asks, I wasn’t home, alright? You didn’t see me, this conversation never happened. Agree? *He holds his free hand out to shake*

shax-attacx

Agreed.

*She shakes his hand, before putting the notes away.*

Seriously, though, where are your plants? She mentioned them, or at least, I assume that's what "the Serpent's Eden" means.

thedemon-crowley

Come with me.

*he motions for her to follow and heads towards the plant room*

I have to say…seems terribly out of character for Abigail, all this…

*There. Not quite interrupting the prank in any meaningful way, but not saying nothing either!*

shax-attacx

*She follows him through his flat.*

Well, perhaps she is trying something new. Or maybe you don't know her as well as you think.

*It's rather easy to spot the bright pink paper amidst all the greenery, and she snatches up the third note quickly.*

thedemon-crowley

*He looks at her VERY POINTEDLY over his sunglasses*

I highly doubt that. But *shrug* it’s your funeral.

*He goes about misting his plants and looking disinterested*

What does it say then?

shax-attacx

*She opens the note, reading over it, blushing, and then showing it to Crowley.

In neat, curly writing is the following note:*

"Now, dear, I must ask you to instead head to the safest place there is; get to the home of your ruler, and do so promptly."

thedemon-crowley

*He scoffs*

I refuse to believe Abigail would write that. I don’t know what you’re getting all giddy for, I really have my doubts.

thedemon-crowley

*Sneaking into the "traitor's" house really ought to warrant being quiet, or at least sneaky. Unfortunately, @shax-attacx is rather one track mind right now, and is being neither quiet nor sneaky.

(The pink note was slipped amongst the plants by Eric earlier, shh!)*

*Crowley appears in the doorway, armed with a plant mister*

What are you doing here?! I thought you were lurking outside the bookshop!

shax-attacx

*She jumps, keeping a very close eye on that plant mister.*

I'm - on an assignment. Yeah. That. This is for work. I still have to do my job. Where are you plants?

thedemon-crowley

*He narrows his eyes*

Wouldn’t you like to know? I wasn’t born yesterday - tell me why you’re actually here!

shax-attacx

*She hesitates for a moment, looking around as if making sure no one else is there.*

This is - technically - an assignment. Just... not for work.

*She pulls out the two notes, both on pink paper, stamped with the King's sigil, and scented with her perfume.*

thedemon-crowley

*He looks at them for a while and sighs before handing them back*

If anyone asks, I wasn’t home, alright? You didn’t see me, this conversation never happened. Agree? *He holds his free hand out to shake*

shax-attacx

Agreed.

*She shakes his hand, before putting the notes away.*

Seriously, though, where are your plants? She mentioned them, or at least, I assume that's what "the Serpent's Eden" means.

thedemon-crowley

Come with me.

*he motions for her to follow and heads towards the plant room*

I have to say…seems terribly out of character for Abigail, all this…

*There. Not quite interrupting the prank in any meaningful way, but not saying nothing either!*

shax-attacx

*She follows him through his flat.*

Well, perhaps she is trying something new. Or maybe you don't know her as well as you think.

*It's rather easy to spot the bright pink paper amidst all the greenery, and she snatches up the third note quickly.*

thedemon-crowley

*He looks at her VERY POINTEDLY over his sunglasses*

I highly doubt that. But *shrug* it’s your funeral.

*He goes about misting his plants and looking disinterested*

What does it say then?

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thedemon-crowley

*Sneaking into the "traitor's" house really ought to warrant being quiet, or at least sneaky. Unfortunately, @shax-attacx is rather one track mind right now, and is being neither quiet nor sneaky.

(The pink note was slipped amongst the plants by Eric earlier, shh!)*

*Crowley appears in the doorway, armed with a plant mister*

What are you doing here?! I thought you were lurking outside the bookshop!

shax-attacx

*She jumps, keeping a very close eye on that plant mister.*

I'm - on an assignment. Yeah. That. This is for work. I still have to do my job. Where are you plants?

thedemon-crowley

*He narrows his eyes*

Wouldn’t you like to know? I wasn’t born yesterday - tell me why you’re actually here!

shax-attacx

*She hesitates for a moment, looking around as if making sure no one else is there.*

This is - technically - an assignment. Just... not for work.

*She pulls out the two notes, both on pink paper, stamped with the King's sigil, and scented with her perfume.*

thedemon-crowley

*He looks at them for a while and sighs before handing them back*

If anyone asks, I wasn’t home, alright? You didn’t see me, this conversation never happened. Agree? *He holds his free hand out to shake*

shax-attacx

Agreed.

*She shakes his hand, before putting the notes away.*

Seriously, though, where are your plants? She mentioned them, or at least, I assume that's what "the Serpent's Eden" means.

thedemon-crowley

Come with me.

*he motions for her to follow and heads towards the plant room*

I have to say…seems terribly out of character for Abigail, all this…

*There. Not quite interrupting the prank in any meaningful way, but not saying nothing either!*

thedemon-crowley

*Sneaking into the "traitor's" house really ought to warrant being quiet, or at least sneaky. Unfortunately, @shax-attacx is rather one track mind right now, and is being neither quiet nor sneaky.

(The pink note was slipped amongst the plants by Eric earlier, shh!)*

*Crowley appears in the doorway, armed with a plant mister*

What are you doing here?! I thought you were lurking outside the bookshop!

shax-attacx

*She jumps, keeping a very close eye on that plant mister.*

I'm - on an assignment. Yeah. That. This is for work. I still have to do my job. Where are you plants?

thedemon-crowley

*He narrows his eyes*

Wouldn’t you like to know? I wasn’t born yesterday - tell me why you’re actually here!

shax-attacx

*She hesitates for a moment, looking around as if making sure no one else is there.*

This is - technically - an assignment. Just... not for work.

*She pulls out the two notes, both on pink paper, stamped with the King's sigil, and scented with her perfume.*

thedemon-crowley

*He looks at them for a while and sighs before handing them back*

If anyone asks, I wasn’t home, alright? You didn’t see me, this conversation never happened. Agree? *He holds his free hand out to shake*

thedemon-crowley

A red-bellied black snake approached cautiously, staring up at Crowley in what really only he could tell was some sort of....heartache?

(/familial but that's the only word I could think of)

@urban-eden-somewhat-official

Er…hello?

*For reasons he isn’t quite sure of, he puts his hand out, almost like one would towards a cat to let them sniff*

You’re a long way from home.

urban-eden-somewhat-official

The serpent didn't need to, instead gently headbutting his hand. Yes, she was far from home.

thedemon-crowley

*He holds his palm out and gently beckons with his fingers*

C’mon, climb up.

thedemon-crowley

*Sneaking into the "traitor's" house really ought to warrant being quiet, or at least sneaky. Unfortunately, @shax-attacx is rather one track mind right now, and is being neither quiet nor sneaky.

(The pink note was slipped amongst the plants by Eric earlier, shh!)*

*Crowley appears in the doorway, armed with a plant mister*

What are you doing here?! I thought you were lurking outside the bookshop!

shax-attacx

*She jumps, keeping a very close eye on that plant mister.*

I'm - on an assignment. Yeah. That. This is for work. I still have to do my job. Where are you plants?

thedemon-crowley

*He narrows his eyes*

Wouldn’t you like to know? I wasn’t born yesterday - tell me why you’re actually here!

*Sneaking into the "traitor's" house really ought to warrant being quiet, or at least sneaky. Unfortunately, @shax-attacx is rather one track mind right now, and is being neither quiet nor sneaky.

(The pink note was slipped amongst the plants by Eric earlier, shh!)*

*Crowley appears in the doorway, armed with a plant mister*

What are you doing here?! I thought you were lurking outside the bookshop!

#crowleyposting #🐍🍎🔥

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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*hugs you reallyyyyy tightly*

*Hugs back with all the squeeze you might expect from a snake, despite not being a constrictor*

What was that for?

#crowleyposting #🐍🍎🔥

*turns you into a duck (for as long as you want)*

*disgruntled quack*

#crowleyposting #🐍🍎🔥

A red-bellied black snake approached cautiously, staring up at Crowley in what really only he could tell was some sort of....heartache?

(/familial but that's the only word I could think of)

@urban-eden-somewhat-official

Er…hello?

*For reasons he isn’t quite sure of, he puts his hand out, almost like one would towards a cat to let them sniff*

You’re a long way from home.

#crowleyposting #🐍🍎🔥

thedemon-crowley

Oi, C-Man, how much do you know about this crush Shax has on my sister?

-Eric

Well, I don’t know how it started, I just know she’s down bad, borrowed a book on romance from Aziraphale - who originally thought the crush was on ME - and I gave her some casual “advice” that has gotten me in trouble.

Anything else you need to know?

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oooo, do you know what book? That could be useful.

Do you wanna join me and Beelz in pranking Shax? We're thinking... fake love notes leading her on a wild goose chase. To start, of course.

thedemon-crowley

I don’t know, you’d have to ask Aziraphale.

I…*groans miserably* I can’t. Abigail will have my head if I get involved any more, and she’s the only thing standing between me and the Hordes.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oh, come on, it'll be fun!

thedemon-crowley

I know! I know it will! But Eric, there’s only one of me, and I like being alive.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oh, please, it wouldn't be that bad. She hasn't tried to kill you nearly as many times as Dad has, and you do stuff that pisses him off all the time.

thedemon-crowley

Key difference: I have a few easy-peasy get-out-of-jail-free cards to use with Lucifer.

I don’t have any kind of defence against anyond else except the fact that the King is my friend.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

You gave her that sword for her birthday, pretty sure she's still over the moon about that. It's become, like, her de-facto sword. What's she gonna do, stab you with the sword you gave her? No, that'd be rude. Dude, it'll be fine!!!!!!!

thedemon-crowley

Listen, she couldn’t have made it any clearer that I’d gotten myself more than involved enough, and if word gets back to Aziraphale that I went off causing more trouble after that? Abigail will be the least of my problems.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Ah. I suppose that is true. Fair enough.

thedemon-crowley

There’s a gold star in it for you if you keep me posted, though…

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Deal!

thedemon-crowley

Knew I could count on you!

#see! for all that he looks like butterscotch and whipped cream he could be bloody dangerous if he wanted!

thedemon-crowley

Oi, C-Man, how much do you know about this crush Shax has on my sister?

-Eric

Well, I don’t know how it started, I just know she’s down bad, borrowed a book on romance from Aziraphale - who originally thought the crush was on ME - and I gave her some casual “advice” that has gotten me in trouble.

Anything else you need to know?

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oooo, do you know what book? That could be useful.

Do you wanna join me and Beelz in pranking Shax? We're thinking... fake love notes leading her on a wild goose chase. To start, of course.

thedemon-crowley

I don’t know, you’d have to ask Aziraphale.

I…*groans miserably* I can’t. Abigail will have my head if I get involved any more, and she’s the only thing standing between me and the Hordes.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oh, come on, it'll be fun!

thedemon-crowley

I know! I know it will! But Eric, there’s only one of me, and I like being alive.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oh, please, it wouldn't be that bad. She hasn't tried to kill you nearly as many times as Dad has, and you do stuff that pisses him off all the time.

thedemon-crowley

Key difference: I have a few easy-peasy get-out-of-jail-free cards to use with Lucifer.

I don’t have any kind of defence against anyond else except the fact that the King is my friend.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

You gave her that sword for her birthday, pretty sure she's still over the moon about that. It's become, like, her de-facto sword. What's she gonna do, stab you with the sword you gave her? No, that'd be rude. Dude, it'll be fine!!!!!!!

thedemon-crowley

Listen, she couldn’t have made it any clearer that I’d gotten myself more than involved enough, and if word gets back to Aziraphale that I went off causing more trouble after that? Abigail will be the least of my problems.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Ah. I suppose that is true. Fair enough.

thedemon-crowley

There’s a gold star in it for you if you keep me posted, though…

#don’t go pissing Aziraphale off either! he’s like a whole different angel

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

thedemon-crowley

Oi, C-Man, how much do you know about this crush Shax has on my sister?

-Eric

Well, I don’t know how it started, I just know she’s down bad, borrowed a book on romance from Aziraphale - who originally thought the crush was on ME - and I gave her some casual “advice” that has gotten me in trouble.

Anything else you need to know?

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oooo, do you know what book? That could be useful.

Do you wanna join me and Beelz in pranking Shax? We're thinking... fake love notes leading her on a wild goose chase. To start, of course.

thedemon-crowley

I don’t know, you’d have to ask Aziraphale.

I…*groans miserably* I can’t. Abigail will have my head if I get involved any more, and she’s the only thing standing between me and the Hordes.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oh, come on, it'll be fun!

thedemon-crowley

I know! I know it will! But Eric, there’s only one of me, and I like being alive.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oh, please, it wouldn't be that bad. She hasn't tried to kill you nearly as many times as Dad has, and you do stuff that pisses him off all the time.

thedemon-crowley

Key difference: I have a few easy-peasy get-out-of-jail-free cards to use with Lucifer.

I don’t have any kind of defence against anyond else except the fact that the King is my friend.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

You gave her that sword for her birthday, pretty sure she's still over the moon about that. It's become, like, her de-facto sword. What's she gonna do, stab you with the sword you gave her? No, that'd be rude. Dude, it'll be fine!!!!!!!

thedemon-crowley

Listen, she couldn’t have made it any clearer that I’d gotten myself more than involved enough, and if word gets back to Aziraphale that I went off causing more trouble after that? Abigail will be the least of my problems.

#ever been locked in a room with a furious angel?#terrifying bit of business no matter how much you like them

thedemon-crowley

Oi, C-Man, how much do you know about this crush Shax has on my sister?

-Eric

Well, I don’t know how it started, I just know she’s down bad, borrowed a book on romance from Aziraphale - who originally thought the crush was on ME - and I gave her some casual “advice” that has gotten me in trouble.

Anything else you need to know?

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oooo, do you know what book? That could be useful.

Do you wanna join me and Beelz in pranking Shax? We're thinking... fake love notes leading her on a wild goose chase. To start, of course.

thedemon-crowley

I don’t know, you’d have to ask Aziraphale.

I…*groans miserably* I can’t. Abigail will have my head if I get involved any more, and she’s the only thing standing between me and the Hordes.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oh, come on, it'll be fun!

thedemon-crowley

I know! I know it will! But Eric, there’s only one of me, and I like being alive.

ask-eric-the-disposable-demon

Oh, please, it wouldn't be that bad. She hasn't tried to kill you nearly as many times as Dad has, and you do stuff that pisses him off all the time.

thedemon-crowley

Key difference: I have a few easy-peasy get-out-of-jail-free cards to use with Lucifer.

I don’t have any kind of defence against anyond else except the fact that the King is my friend.

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