The Coffeelorian

Viserys, the beloved king of the Team Black… Shall I start straight with Aemma? Yes. Between getting her pregnant very young and continuing to try for a male heir at the cost of his wife’s health, Viserys is already more than questionable.

The scene of Aemma’s death? It’s the height of Viserys’ hypocrisy. He had his wife cut open to pull out a child. Both died. And then? He cries, he wallows.

Yeah, except it was his order. He could have spared his wife additional suffering. Performing surgery without the equipment or the know-how is like throwing someone who doesn’t know how to swim into the Mariana Trench. It’s not a happy ending.

Then what happens? He banishes Daemon and names Rhaenyra as future queen… in a medieval political system where, years earlier (at the Great Council), women were barred from the throne…

We agree, Rhaenyra was named to block Daemon.

And his marriage to her??

A truly competent king would have stripped Rhaenyra of her title as future queen because she disobeyed the one condition that made her heir. (Future queen… in a society where only the first male child can access the throne…). But he keeps her.

“But he forgave Daemon!”

Viserys’ brain was so rotten he couldn’t even call Alicent by her name.

“Yeah but it’s an insult to the Greens, they deserve it!”

No. It’s a sign that his brain was literally rotting.

What? He wants to be progressive? Then first, he should have given Rhaenyra real responsibilities instead of making her serve wine. He should have put her in front of the council, made her participate, and shut down the council that kept telling her she was just a girl.

He should have stopped his so-called daughter from going to Dragonstone to retrieve the dragon egg, had her watched so she wouldn’t run off with her UNCLE who wants the throne, and especially prevented her from visiting brothels.

“But she was of age!”

I don’t give a fuck. She’s the future queen! She’s supposed to be above her uncle and the lords who go to whores like it’s their right!

Oh, the good king Viserys. He always wanted a son.

He marries Alicent Hightower. (A marriage that’s already more than questionable.) They have three sons and a daughter in the show. Three sons. Three possible heirs. And he doesn’t raise them. (I’ll come back to each child later.)

He ends up so eaten away by leprosy that it looks more like dark magic than a miracle that he survived that long.

Did he strengthen Rhaenyra’s future reign? Apart from cutting out tongues and therefore fueling the lords’ anger, no.

Did he raise his sons to be kings? No.

He did nothing. And he still dares to die whispering “my love.” Well, Aemma must have kicked his ass hard considering everything what happened during and after his reign.

I can already hear you complaining. But be brave. We’re moving on to Rhaenyra Targaryen.

Rhaenyra.

The one everyone tries to portray as a woman who had to live through hardship, etc., etc.

If every noble woman and girl in the Seven Kingdoms had done even a tenth of what Rhaenyra did, they would have been stripped of their titles, their names, and sent to the Silent Sisters or into exile.

Rhaenyra had a chance that many women in Westeros and Essos never had: the choice of her future husband. Take the Baratheons as an example. It wasn’t Lord Borros’ daughters who chose their husbands. It was their father, along with the future husband or his family, who chose the girl to be married.

Rhaenyra could have had any unmarried young man or lord in the realm, even a Martell prince to secure lasting peace.

But miss refused because of her obsession with Daemon. An obsession repressed by Westerosi laws. Incestuous marriages are forbidden and generally very poorly viewed. There are no exceptions. Even among the Targaryens, incestuous marriage was frowned upon because it gave lords every reason to see them as monsters. Dragons or not.

Her night with Cole? Even though I don’t like the man, in the show she seduces him after being groped by her uncle in a brothel… Just writing this sounds like abuse that cannot in any way be considered consensual. But I’ll come back to that when I talk about Daemon.

She gets caught. Ends up with her father who doesn’t believe her. She loses Alicent because she lied to her. I’ll talk about that better when I get to Alicent.

She destroys the trust of the only two people who were on her side.

Alright, small time jump.

Her marriage to Laenor, who can’t have children… and she ends up with Harwin Strong… an older man, a guard, and above all… white. Laenor is mixed… the children she have had should have been mixed, not white “I burn in the sun in under 2 minutes.”

And I remind you again for those who forgot: I’m talking about the show, not the books.

Every sane person in the Seven Kingdoms knows the moment they see a Velaryon and Rhaenyra’s children that they are bastards. No exceptions.

Spoiler for season 2 and 3.

*cough* Velaryon. *cough*

Instead of owning it, or finding a guard who at least slightly resembled Laenor (and there were some), Madame preferred to do whatever she wanted, as usual.

Instead of making herself heard, instead of being clever, she chose to act like a spoiled brat because her father was king and he was cutting out the tongues of those who said her children were bastards. Even though it was the truth.

She lives in such denial that she doesn’t understand how having bastards on the throne would blow up the Seven Kingdoms.

The day Jacaerys would ascend the throne, every bastard born before the first legitimate male child could claim they had a right to noble houses. Baratheon, Lannister, Stark, Martell, Tyrell, and all the others, great or small. Every bastard could invoke blood right over name right.

You really think faking Laenor’s death so he could flee to Essos was a good idea? He doesn’t even have his dragon — just the dragon itself is a trail that should have followed Laenor everywhere and never taken another rider.

Laenor’s death is a terrible strategy. Especially when you marry right after Laena’s death (Daemon’s second era) and right after Laenor (Rhaenyra’s husband).

People aren’t stupid. Two suspicious deaths one after the other and the two of them secretly marrying right after. It screams assassination and betrayal from a mile away.

From here, I’m going to include two of her children while still talking about Rhaenyra, because dissecting them separately would make everything unreadable.

Jacaerys and Lucerys “Strong” Velaryon (not Targaryen).

Two children born as bastards, constantly put back in their place by their uncles and their stepmother (yes, I’m talking about Alicent, don’t start losing me).

They are highly controversial heir princes.

They mock Aemond because he doesn’t have a dragon yet. They think they’re untouchable.

Untouchable while Viserys is alive.

Aemond’s eye being gouged out: let’s remember, it was Lucerys and Jacaerys who started the fight against Aemond.

“But Vhagar was meant for Rhaena!”

Vhagar is an old dragon, a war machine. If Rhaena had hesitated or shown fear, Vhagar would have burned her alive. Child of Laena or not.

How does it end? Lucerys or Jacaerys pulls a dagger and Aemond loses an eye. How do they come out of it? With a few scratches. Rhaenyra and Viserys defend them.

In other noble houses, at minimum a finger would have been broken or an eye gouged out to show that a crime doesn’t go unpunished.

BECAUSE REMINDER (for those in the back):

Gouging out an eye is a crime and some people have been hanged for less. Especially when it’s done to a prince of the blood.

And just before that? Rhaenyra, instead of asserting her title as future queen and sending Alicent and her children away from the Red Keep, leaves for Dragonstone with zero allies.

Because Madame has no notion of politics or what ruling actually means.

I’m going to be harsh and blunt.

Lucerys’ death is entirely Rhaenyra’s fault.

She should have waited for Daemon, who has fought in wars and knows strategy.

She should have sent ravens, not barely teenage kids on small dragons across Westeros.

Because sending Lucerys to Storm’s End was suicide!

You don’t send an emissary who is a prince with no bargaining power to the lord he’s visiting. Especially not in a region where the Greens had already arrived faster with valid marriage proposals.

The Baratheons have a terrible temper and an pride you shouldn’t even scratch.

Sending Lucerys alone when Vhagar was waiting on the other side was stupid.

And we know how it ended: swallowed by Vhagar.

And as time goes on, Rhaenyra proves more and more that she doesn’t know how to rule.

The murder of Helaena’s son?

“It’s not her fault! It’s Daemon!”

Except Rhaenyra is not innocent, because she wanted the life of one of Alicent’s sons. Whether it was Aegon, Aemond or Daeron, she didn’t care — it was Alicent’s son. And she says it clearly. She wants Aemond Targaryen. A prince. She’s no saint.

The fact that she suddenly kicks Daemon out because she no longer trusts him is absurd beyond words. Discovering after several years that your UNCLE is problematic depending on the situation is hilarious.

And I’m not even at the end of season 2… let alone season 3…

I’m moving on to another topic linked to Rhaenyra before getting to the Greens:

The Targaryen bastards. (The dragonseeds)

Calling on bastards from the poor and seedy districts of King’s Landing was stupid, vicious, and cruel.

These people have nothing! Their families are dying of famine and disease in the capital!

And she wants to give them dragons? Without telling them they’re going to be burned alive or eaten? Possibly both at once?

Giving dragons to bastards, when that was the only thing allowing her own bastards to sit on the throne through fear, is the way to destroy your reign. She left the biggest dragons in the hands of people seeking recognition. She and Daemon mock them.

FYI: Vermithor would eat Syrax in one bite.

Rhaenyra should have prayed to a god of strategy, because right now… she’s hammering the nails into her own coffin.

Alright… I’ll be nice and stop here with Team Black.

A side that claims to be virtuous but has sunk into denial, gratuitous cruelty, contempt for the law, and total political incompetence?

Get ready, Team Green. This is gonna sting.

Otto Hightower

Manipulator? Yes and no.

He is the Hand of the King. He sees what Viserys is: a weak king who is wasting away with time.

Any man in a feudal period would have done what Otto did to try to get his family on the royal side and his blood in the line, whether the king was young or old.

The fandom often calls Otto a monster, but it’s an excellent reading of the feudal system where the survival of a noble house depends on its ascension. Faced with a king like Viserys who is collapsing and an unpredictable Daemon, Otto acts pragmatically.

Why did he warn Alicent about Rhaenyra?

He saw how Daemon behaved with her and how the princess was. Having Alicent alone in the castle with her children, facing people who have dragons that can kill them and a Viserys who wouldn’t lift a finger? Otto understood before everyone else the deadly danger weighing on his own bloodline.

If Rhaenyra takes the throne with Daemon, Alicent’s children (the rival male sons) automatically become mortal targets.

Otto is not just power-hungry, he is anticipating an inevitable purge in a world where Viserys would never have lifted a finger to protect his children from the second marriage bed. He wanted to give his daughter some power to protect herself, but everything turned against him.

The greatest example of this failure was Aegon and Aemond.

But before moving on to those two, we have to talk about Alicent.

Alicent Hightower

Who in the show is roughly the same age as Rhaenyra, therefore older than Laena.

Her father makes her understand that she must keep the king company; she does it because it’s her only family in the castle. She has no mother to help and advise her. She’s a terrified teenager, manipulated by her father, with no maternal figure to guide her. Gwayne is still young and in Oldtown, so he can’t defend her.

Have children with a man who is much older than you, incidentally the father of your best friend who is starting to hate you while you understood her pain over the loss of her mother, endure successive pregnancies very young, all while seeing Rhaenyra enjoy total freedom and lie to you openly.

Don’t tell me you wouldn’t become bitter.

Her piety and moral rigidity in season 1 are only defense mechanisms in the face of a life of imposed sacrifices, while Rhaenyra does whatever she wants and never pays the bill.

Because yes. As said earlier, if Alicent had done a tenth of what Rhaenyra did so openly, even as queen in title, she would have ended up in a cell for treason and infidelity. The system forgives nothing to Alicent, while it always finds excuses for Rhaenyra.

The fact that she defends Criston Cole even though he killed someone at a royal wedding? First, it’s not right at all, and second, she finds in him someone who was disappointed by Rhaenyra. It’s the alliance of two beings eaten away by resentment: Cole is lovesick personified, and Alicent is rancor incarnate.

By saving Cole’s life, she buys herself a fanatical guard dog who hates the princess as much as she does.

I’m not defending Cole: his flip because Rhaenyra says no is a huge red flag. The way he talks about a future queen (whether competent or not) would have earned him a cut tongue, and knowing he shared her bed would have gotten him castrated. In any other reign, a Kingsguard knight violating his vows like that would have ended up at minimum at the Wall.

His behavior on the battlefield?

His behavior becomes more and more cruel. And in season 3?… This is not the behavior of an honest knight, but of an executioner. His so-called chivalric devotion was only a facade to hide his bitterness and cruelty.

Alicent’s alliance with Larys Strong?

A beginner’s mistake.

Having to show her feet for an assassination? You really think there will be no consequences? Alicent, who prides herself on morality and religious piety, agrees to lower herself to a creepy fetish in exchange for political murders, making herself a slave to Larys’ blackmail through lack of mastery of the political game.

The guy is ready to kill his own father and brother in a more-than-damp castle. Fire naturally hates humidity; it doesn’t just appear there. Someone who destroys his own blood to advance and gain the queen’s favor will never have any loyalty. She allied herself with a sociopathic monster thinking she was controlling a servant.

Alright.

I’ll let you catch your breath a bit.

5~

4~

3~

2~

1~

Aegon II Targaryen.

Now here… We’re reaching the pinnacle of disaster.

He wasn’t educated, he’s been an alcoholic since a very young age. He rapes servants as well as young girls in the back alleys of King’s Landing, and he fathered many bastards.

We are shown a broken young man, cruel to Aemond.

A pure product of an absent father’s neglect and an overwhelmed mother’s paranoia, where family trauma is passed from generation to generation. He was forced to marry Helaena, and they had children very young, especially her. Forced marriage? Yes, by Alicent. Because Rhaenyra had proposed marrying Jacaerys to Helaena. An offer refused by Alicent even though it could have brought lasting peace. Out of pure resentment and refusal to see her daughter linked to bastardy, she herself locks the political trap and condemns her own children to the hell of this incestuous union, sacrificed on the altar of duty.

Yet? In the show, there is this fascinating paradox: he wants to spend time with his children, he doesn’t want to reproduce what he lived with his own father. Behind the debauched monster, there is the desperate will to break the cycle of family trauma and give his heir the recognition that Viserys refused him all his life.

But tragedy catches up with him. We see Aegon cry over the loss of his child and Alicent who doesn’t comfort him. She doesn’t really comfort Helaena either. It’s the terrible observation of her maternal coldness: incapable of offering the slightest human warmth, she remains a ghost mother in front of her own children broken by grief at the moment they lose everything.

The fact that he goes to war completely drunk? It’s the act of a cruel, broken and traumatized man who is trying to do what he can. It’s not the choice of a lucid general, it’s the suicidal gesture of a king humiliated by his council, shattered by grief and ravaged by pain, who rides toward the fire simply to prove that he exists, his worth, or to end it all.

Aemond Targaryen now.

A child humiliated because he didn’t have a dragon.

The day he claims one?

In return, he loses an eye. His father threatens his brother and him with cutting out their tongues if they call their nephews bastards… On top of his missing eye, he risks mutilation, while he sees his mother trying to assassinate the future queen and the bastards receiving no punishment… It’s cosmically unfair. I think many people would have developed a deep hatred from that moment. This is where the monster is born.

He grows up in hatred, his mother’s paranoia, a toxic Criston Cole, and a father literally rotting in front of the entire castle. His sister whom he loved was forced into marriage, and he was forced to go to whores by Aegon when he was young. His entire environment was designed to destroy him from the inside.

And in the show, a prostitute acts like a substitute mother? He walks around completely naked in front of everyone even though he’s a prince? Even though he hates that his brother goes to whores? The show’s writers have big problems with mothers...

Even more in season 3…

It’s a total contradiction for a character obsessed with control and royal dignity, reduced to poorly written trauma.

Is Aemond all green?

No, far from it.

He burns an entire village out of frustration because Rhaenyra has more dragons on her side and he was forced to turn back. As soon as he loses the geopolitical advantage, he vents his rage in a purely sadistic way on innocents, proving there is no virtue or honor in his methods, just destructive fury.

He thought he could manipulate a war beast like Vhagar, which caused Lucerys’ death. By playing tough at Storm’s End to terrorize his nephew, his arrogance completely overtook him. He triggered an apocalypse he didn’t have the maturity to control, becoming the prisoner of his own weapon.

And the further we go in the series, the uglier it gets. His moral drift and gratuitous cruelty completely erase the unjustly wounded kid and turn him into a fairground monster.

Daeron Targaryen.

This kid has nothing to do with this conflict. He was far away from the Red Keep. He is described as a good son and the opposite of his brothers. How can a child who wasn’t even at the castle have any connection with Jacaerys, Lucerys, Aegon or Aemond??? This kid ends up with his dragon having to go to war because of conflicts that are way bigger than him.

You see? Same seed, but not the same drifts.

Daemon Targaryen.

The guy still seduces his own underage niece, then takes her out of the castle at night, brings her into the city and then to the whores.

If his “Prince for a Day” line hadn’t already tipped you off: Daemon is a troublemaker.

His good sides?

Swift justice? Even if debatable, the smallfolk liked him because he did the work Viserys didn’t give orders for.

He participated in wars, which makes him the guy with the most experience on Team Black.

He has charm and knows how to use it.

The bad sides? Besides the ones already described?

He is impulsive and can be unpredictable. You can go from ally to enemy with one wrong word and depending on his mood.

Everyone says he is loyal to Rhaenyra except he runs off with Nettles in the books.

Nettles…

The show is a shame for removing her!

So back to Daemon.

He manipulates his niece to get the throne, runs off with Laena because he can’t have Rhaenyra (I’m talking about the show side, not the book. Don’t come bothering me with the Daemon/Laena/Rhaenyra throuple!).

He sleeps with Rhaenyra after his second wife is sent to the sea.

He leaves for Harrenhal instead of trying to calm Rhaenyra, which would have prevented a lot of bullshit from happening.

The guy could have gonorrhea and a lot of people would still adore him anyway.

Gwayne Hightower

Oh Gwayne…

If there’s one thing I thank the show for, it’s him.

It shows him as the perfect opposite of Criston Cole, Daemon and many other characters. He’s still down-to-earth without all the religious control. You see that he cares about his nieces and nephews. You see that he was the son neglected by Otto. He’s fed up with Criston.

His line about the value of knights… the guy would have been on Dunk’s side.

You’re going to tell me:

“You’re going hard on the Blacks!!!”

To which I will reply:

“Go complain to the screenwriters.”

I’m only bringing the behaviors to light. And don’t worry, Team Black, with season 3 I’ll have other things to throw at the Greens.

“You hate Daemon!”

Wrong. I love Daemon. And it’s because he’s a grey character. He has as much good as bad, even if season 2 destroyed him and I fear the worst for the rest of season 3.

I didn’t talk about Corlys, Rhaenys, Helaena, etc. At the same time, this post is already really long. If you want, I can tear down the allies of both teams, but that will be in another post.