Oh nah, you have me all kinds of messed up if you don’t think that Peter would be doing this Steve Irwin style.
Peter, clinging to the ceiling of the compound by the entrance to the kitchen: And here we have the majestic Sorcerer Supreme in his natural habitat, preparing an offering for his mate. Take a look a’ that beauty, picking only the best coffee from the freezer. If he gets it right, he’ll be in for a treat!
Stephen: *has grown used to the weird and just continues to make coffee like a Normal Person*
Tony, coming off a 4 hour nap after a 36 hour engineering bender: *bleerily stumbles into the room as the coffee starts brewing*
Peter: Look a’ that, the sound of the coffee grinder has woken Iron Man, and he is about to start his morning routine. If anything goes wrong on his hunt for caffeine though, crikey mate, it’ll be a disaster. A fully grown Iron Man can disintegrate an entire alien invasion if provoked, and are also known to bite off the heads of a Hydra in the wild.
Peter, having no sense of self-preservation: Let’s take a closer look. *inches towards Tony and the coffee*
Tony: *is walking by touch*
Peter: *quietly* Can you see the way he’s navigating the area? His eyes are barely open, so he has to feel around. Even in this state though, an Iron Man has a fully prepared 3D map of his environment. It’s as if-
Tony: *steps on a lego and starts swearing*
Peter, experiencing his first moment of common sense that month: Okay, he’s spooked. I’m gonna back up slightly and give him space because I respect his power and ability to have me benched.
Tony, slightly more awake, but not enough to register Peter: *continues his perilous trek to get coffee*
Stephen: *is still not gonna say anything but this is the weirdest thing to happen all week*
Peter: He made it! He- Mr. Stark, are you okay?!
Tony: *still choking on coffee after Peter scared the shit out of him by dropping down for a close up*
Stephen: *sighs and opens a portal to flick Peter in the back of the head*
Tony: Peter, why do people think Spider-Man is Steve Irwin’s clone?
Peter, having sent Shuri the video and asked her to filter his voice: Huh, no idea.
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