The Capitol Gazette

The Capitol Gazette - Special Edition: 129th Biannual Hunger Games

!! WHICH SPACE THEMED LATTE FITS YOUR VIBE - TAKE THE QUIZ !!

‼️ CLICK ON THE LINK TO MAKE YOUR BETS ON WHO WILL FUCK, WHO WILL FIGHT, AND WHO WILL BE THE NEXT HUNGER GAMES VICTOR ‼️

Oops, a glitch in our system! You know how it is: sometimes you need to wait for the best things. And Rhea certainly seems to be striving to be the best thing, well, person. We’re curious to see if anything will break her, or if she might prove you can kill with kindness.

Are K names a thing in Thirteen? They might be now, with two strong contenders from Thirteen. Yeah, yeah, we’ve seen Konner in the Tower - he doesn’t have a clue what he’s doing. But what eighteen-year-old boy really does? We’ll give him the benefit of the doubt his team and authenticity will help him. And so will the secret powers he got from a radioactive bug bite.

And we were concerned we might not have much to say about these kids from Thirteen. Knox is coming in hot (or is that the radioactivity?) after volunteering for Jeannie Twill. So far she hasn’t done anything more that’s made our jaws drop, but we’re keeping a close eye on her. She might already have a better grip on these Games than she knows. 

District Twelve may normally only mine coal, but every now and then, a gem is found. There’s something mischievous about him, we can tell. Maybe it’s just the hair, or maybe it’s something more. Regardless, we can’t wait to see what he gets up to both before and during the arena.

She’s weird. Everyone else got that, right? We thought this kind of weird was Holland’s niche. If she ends up getting lost and found in the morgue, someone please send us pictures because we certainly are not going down there.

Wait, let us guess... she’s someone’s little sister? We’ve all seen this play before, but let’s settle in with a drink and some popcorn. Maybe this is just what Gatlin needs to launch himself into mentoring. And maybe this is also just what the waterproof mascara industry needed to put its products to the ultimate test.

We’re still trying to figure out what the “it” that Indiana is “of.” We’d ask, but we don’t want to get yelled at. Actions speak louder than words, but Indy seems to want them both loud - and angry. We love it, can’t wait to see it in the bloodbath. But also, that’s the sort of thing you watch from a distance.

Those ghosts of 120 sure did have a lot of babies. At least this one’s cute. He also seems like he has the making of a good tribute: strong, with some grit, and not too smart. He seems a little hot and cold right now, but we’re here to say: go on, Shiloh, make some friends! You only live in the arena once!

The other half of everyone’s favorite, punk rock girl group. They’re so angry, and it’s so cute. We love a vendetta! Please be sure to get your “Hazel Sawyer Interview Bingo Card” in the latest print issue of the Capitol Gazette. We are anticipating an Aspen mention, spitting at Holland, and a wardrobe malfunction. 

Another sibling, but sadly, not another victor’s sibling. Still, this one came with a lil’ bestie in tow. It’s really turning into a family affair around here, but we’ll let it slide for some good ol’ teenage angst! Crank up that grunge music, put on too much eyeliner, and join team... Pazel? Peppel? Hazper? We’ll work on it. 

Miss Vix is here to nix any ideas she’s a meek little thing. Don’t let those doe eyes deceive you. We heard a rumor she’s got something worth fighting for back home, and it seems like she’s already making sure this isn’t the Friend Games. 

Ooooh. Oh this will be sad, won’t it? We love seeing what siblings bring out in our victors, but these Packard boys are simply too cute for it to be cutthroat. Is William brave for his volunteering, or is he just dumb? We’ve seen it before, we’ll probably see it again: not all siblings win. Oh no, grab the tissues!

Is it, like, weird to have a whole shrine to the Games and then get Reaped? Like, what else was gonna happen? Museum, shrine, what’s the difference? There’s no doubt Avenue knows what’s what when it comes to the history of the Hunger Games, but, well, a fortune teller isn’t required to guess her future.