thebookslut

So, in my apocalyptic nightmares, of which I have many (not sure why), the scary part of the dream isn’t whatever cataclysmic environmental event that has plunged the world into chaos or the being chased by contagious, ravenous, flesh-eating no-longer humans or the hopelessness of the impending end of civilization and humanity as we know it.

No, no. The real nightmare (in EVERY one of my dreams) is that I’m out of medication (specifically my anti-anxiety pharmaceuticals) and that I won’t be able to get any more because it’s, you know, the end of the world and all.

That is, legitimately, the scariest part of the nightmare for me. It causes me to wake up tense, disoriented, and panicked with my heart beating a little bit faster. And then I’ll contemplate whether my anxiety over being without my anti-anxiety medication warrants me popping a half mil of Ativan or not.

Anxiety. Can’t live with it… Can't live with it.