Mystery. Mastermind. Misantrophist. Millennial. @the-phantom2 - Tumblr Blog

I'm not evil I just don't understand social cues. The mutilated corpse in my closet is irrelevant

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Me to the hero foiling my plans: I will stab out your eyes and shove them down your throat

Me to the underpaid cashier: good morning thank you so much have a wonderful day

#duality #villaincore #evilcore #villain #villainy #evil overlord #an interesting fact: because of secret identities sometimes both are the same person

secret-blog-4sum1-secretly-evil

do NOT recommend anything to me by saying “it’s really good!” I ONLY engage in EVIL media

#evilposting #evilblr #evilcore #villaincore #villain #villainy #evil overlord #came back to this blog because a post from three years ago is blowing up for some reason.

evilscientist8

Psssst, I have news! A significant Lord of Evil has a crush!

From, Assistant and Goon's citizen friend, Vaporeon2010

(Assistant is @evilassistantbutnotmean and Goon is @boredgoon )

Oh? Well then.... I'll have to know more! This is huge news in the villainy community! A big evil lord...in BIG EVIL LOVE!?

Hehehe....~ how scandalous! Do come back with more info on this situation! I do love a little evil gossip!~

bluejetofficial

If you saw someone in a superhero costume passed out in a dumpster along 8th Street yesterday no the fuck you didn't.

#I saw it from really near #they were not passed out but that’s all I’m gonna say about that #murder #at least I think that’s what you’re referring to it could have just been a different hero #villaincore #evilcore #villainy

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hell-propaganda

I condone everything bad and I’m opposed to everything good.

#evilcore #villain #villainy

Making plans to kidnap a secretary and keep them in a secret place so they can write my emails for me

#also phone calls maybe although that would be risky #like they could scream for help on the phone which would be kinda inconvenient #wait I’m evil I’ll just kill them if they ask for help lol #villaincore #evilcore #villain #villainy #evil overlord

When I think of how many more crimes I could commit if I WERENT FORCED TO WRITE EMAILS AND DO PHONE CALLS

#villaincore #evilcore #villain #villainy #evil overlord

I know how to quietly break a lock and how to wrestle a weapon out of someone’s hand. I can move things with my mind. I can teleport. I can show people their worst fear. I am one of the most powerful and feared people alive.

Is that not enough? Why can’t it ever be enough?

Why do I also have to write emails?

#villaincore #evilcore #villain #villainy #evil overlord #villain pet peeves #emails are the bane of my existence

What’s with all these evil Overlords nowadays? Where are the evil Overladies?

#its 2022 let’s have some evil overladies that stomp everyone that annoys them with their stilettos #villaincore #evilcore #villain #villainy #evil overlord #evil overlady

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99-97

People are so ungrateful. No one ever thanks me for having the patience not to kill them.

#villain #villainy #evilcore #villaincore

This is a PSA:

Listen to your body and don’t overdo the crazy laugh.

I get it, we’re all dramatic bitches and it’s an important step to seem adequately evil, but know your limits.

It’s not great for your reputation as an evil mastermind to have an asthma attack in the middle of a robbery.

#villaincore #evilcore #villain #villainy #evil overlord

mitskiacoustic

i wish killing urself was a reversible thing i think it would be rlly cathartic & i woukd kill myself twice an hour also

the-phantom2

I bet it’s also nice for muscle tension

Like all the muscles relax for a bit? There’s no nerves and joints acting out?

Full body massage but better

#tw suicide #tw sui ideation #death cw #tw unalive

knifefightscene

I don’t need therapy i need to kill people killing people would fix me being covered in blood will make me so stable and normal i promise

the-phantom2

I do it every other day and it works so well

#murder is okay #legalise murder #villain #villainy #villaincore #evilcore #murder cw

The definition of insanity is to do the same thing again and again and expecting a different result.

Therefore I’d like to say that the heros that keep on trying to arrest me, just for me to break out as soon as my powers regenerated a bit, are insane.

#really this can’t be economically sound #especially if you consider the damage that happens during my escape every time #villaincore #evilcore #villain #villainy #evil overlord

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nycteris

#villain #evil genius #villaincore

If I had a dollar for every chandelier I destroyed accidentally, I‘d have two dollars

Which isn’t much but it’s weird that it happened twice

#villaincore #evilcore #villain #villainy #evil overlord #not related to the Phantom of the Opera musical STOP BRINGING THAT UP

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