Bone System!

so, in real life, we’re pretty open about being plural. we wear name and pronoun bracelets everywhere. we wear a “plural pride” bracelet everywhere. our phone case has two sides—one says “the future is plural”, the other says “without a doubt, us”, both with the plural rings in the background.

today, our professor complimented our phone case. I asked if she knew what it meant, and she guessed it was something non-binary related (which I find funny—“the future is plural, like they/them, right?”). I told her the truth. what plurality is. I showed her our bracelets.

you know what she did? she said, “oh, cool. so what name should I call you? it’s not weird if I like, look at your bracelets every day, right?”

I could’ve cried on the spot. I almost did. I just said that she was fine, she could call us our legal name or the one on our bracelets, either worked.

Restricting the definition of who a label/concept can be applied to falls under the same philosophy that the systems that oppress the disabled fall under.

That is to say - restricting access so that imagined invaders and "appropriators" won't get in.

The endo "invaders" are not oppressors in any fashion. Hating them because our oppressors "won't take us seriously because of them" is joining the war on the side of the oppressors. It's only fighting ableism until the oppressors call out a target that's easy enough to punch down on.

We, as a community, can be better, more compassionate than that. Is this truly what being "radical" is? Stop punching down. For your own sake, too. Is this really the "good fight" you want to win? To remove all the "weirdos who don't belong?"

To my friends who still feel hurt, I understand. But the people you are fighting do not want to hurt you. They just want to understand their own individual human experience. If they are angry at us, they are not in the wrong. You know that rage, too, at being told that what you are is not real, or is impossible to take seriously.

You have been taught to value an idea of a "real" experience based in science. But that science is so limited. The DSM-5 is not a bible, it is written with the intent of treating us, making us more palatable, "worth our place in society". It is not something we should be thumping to ward off "impure" things. We do not need purity. We do not need sanctity. We need safety and community, so we need to build it.

If we view endos, willos, or any type of system as a pest, we will choke ourselves with pesticide to eradicate them. This is not kindness. This is not acceptance. It is cruelty.

trans men are men, but they dont have privilege for being men.

intersex men are men, but they dont have privilege for being men.

trans women often are not seen by society as women, but they still aren't seen as men, because they are not the Gender Conforming Perisex Cis Man. so they don't have that kind of privilege.

shout out to plurals who cant communicate internally!

shout out to plurals who have only a few alters in their sys!

shout out to plurals who dont have obvious switches, or noticeable differences when anyone is fronting!

shout out to plurals who have doubt or think their “faking”!

shout out to plurals who dont feel like their “plural enough”!

shout out to plurals who have a front stuck alter and hardly ever see or hear from anyone else in the system!

shout out to plurals whos parts are just them!

shout out to plurals who cant tell where they end and someone else begins!

being plural means smiling and laughing at a joke one of your headmates made, or having witty banter with them as you make a meal that you'll both be able to enjoy

being plural means a headmate going "its okay, you don't have to do this, i can do it" and you thanking them because yeah, you cant do that, and thats okay

being plural means thinking about your headmates when buying new clothes, or seeing a shirt or pair of pants for sale and going "they'd love that !!"

being plural means making one of your headmate's simplyplural profile, and spending lots of time perfecting it so that it fits them to a T

being plural means knowing you aren't alone

being plural means knowing that your headmates, your friends, your family, are always there for you

being plural means love.

Restricting the definition of who a label/concept can be applied to falls under the same philosophy that the systems that oppress the disabled fall under.

That is to say - restricting access so that imagined invaders and "appropriators" won't get in.

The endo "invaders" are not oppressors in any fashion. Hating them because our oppressors "won't take us seriously because of them" is joining the war on the side of the oppressors. It's only fighting ableism until the oppressors call out a target that's easy enough to punch down on.

We, as a community, can be better, more compassionate than that. Is this truly what being "radical" is? Stop punching down. For your own sake, too. Is this really the "good fight" you want to win? To remove all the "weirdos who don't belong?"

To my friends who still feel hurt, I understand. But the people you are fighting do not want to hurt you. They just want to understand their own individual human experience. If they are angry at us, they are not in the wrong. You know that rage, too, at being told that what you are is not real, or is impossible to take seriously.

You have been taught to value an idea of a "real" experience based in science. But that science is so limited. The DSM-5 is not a bible, it is written with the intent of treating us, making us more palatable, "worth our place in society". It is not something we should be thumping to ward off "impure" things. We do not need purity. We do not need sanctity. We need safety and community, so we need to build it.

If we view endos, willos, or any type of system as a pest, we will choke ourselves with pesticide to eradicate them. This is not kindness. This is not acceptance. It is cruelty.