i'll fight my own ass in the desert

Can centaurs slap their own ass to go faster?

That’s it I’m outta here. HYAAAH *slaps own ass*

Undefeated in wizard duels thanks to my devastating countermagic where I close the distance and punch them in the chest 14 times while they try to read a paragraph from a book the size of briefcase. This sorcery shit is easy as hell.

wow i just cant take this anymore *continues to take it*

TIL astronaut Jack Schmidt discovered he was allergic to moon dust, which is a thing millions of other people have probably gone their whole lives never knowing.

Imagine being one of only twelve guys ever to have the honour of walking on the moon and then when you get there you're allergic to it.

if one in twelve humans who have been on the moon was allergic to moon dust, that’s either a one-in-a-million chance or a VERY common allergy

The fact that it’s such a statistically useless sample is DEFINITELY driving a handful of very specialized scientists absolutely crazy

Cave johnson walked so jack schmidt could run

Cats that look at gay people

Lord I lift your name on high

ur tellin me a strawberry pounded this cake

throughout all of fma winry is like “ed please stop fighting im really worried” and ed is like “winry i appreciate the concern but im so fucking angry all the time every day, so i have no choice”

i bet that mario and luigi dont get pussy

And? Do you?

we’re not talking about me right now

my cat when i don’t let him in the bathroom