tehjessicarae

Now, I’ve only performed with a professional circus troupe a couple times in my life, but I have been learning practically my whole life. I’ve done countless routines and performances for a variety of occasions and what I can tell you is that almost all of that, down to the very last second, is planned.

In aerial, there’s very little room for mistakes. Other forms of acrobatics are incredibly challenging, I agree. But when you’re an aerialist, you’re doing these crazy stunts at a height of minimum 12 feet, but usually much higher. On top of all of that, this is a performance. You have to look good, you have to show off, while simultaneously paying close attention to your surroundings, your apparatus, and anyone else you may be working with. You practice and practice and practice over and over again until, not only do you get it right, but you can’t get it wrong. Every single moment is planned best it can, because improvisation is dangerous, risky, and more than likely will result in injury. Of course, improvising a routine is a skill in of itself, but usually those stunts are performed lower to the ground, the moves are simple, basic ones, and it’s not really improv as it is “running through a couple tried and tested moves and positions in different orders.”

When Dick Grayson prepares for a fight, if granted the privilege, he will always look up the building schematics beforehand, noting support structures and windows and the like. If he isn’t granted that luxury, then he will take a good couple of minutes before every fight, before the opponent sees him, to scan the room and make a plan of action before striking. He’ll map out what he wants to do, where he wants to go, and how he’s going to get there. If there’s ever a brief respite in the fight, his mind is instantly calculating a couple different plans, trying to figure out where to go next. If he’s doing straight up hand-to-hand combat, that’s mostly action-reaction to the opponent he’s fighting, but if the particular fight involves his aerial abilities, he most definitely will plan ahead, as much as he can.

Bruce did probably train him to be able to improvise, of course. You never know what will happen on the field, and you have to be prepared. However, this is something Dick probably only utilizes when necessary. Also, the improvised aerial moves are, once again, going to be pretty basic compared to the other stunts he can pull, because to do those higher-level acrobatics, he needs to plan for it. He needs to figure out where he’s at, how he’s going to get where he needs to go. He needs to make sure there’s enough space to move and get leverage, he needs to know if the structure he’s on is sound enough to support his weight. All of that requires planning.

And this will most definitely carry over into other aspects of his life, too. I hate it when people call Nightwing impulsive or carefree. It’s so far from the truth. That boy plans a lot, and I’m not talking contingencies or plans of action like Bruce. I’m talking MCU-Dr-Strange level stuff. Cycling through different possibilities of an outcome before settling on one that will benefit him overall. This has been trained into him since birth, all aerialists know this by heart. You have to plan your routine, no matter if it’s a long one you’re going to work to perfect, or a couple basic skills strung together with elegant-looking transitions. 

[ Servamptober day 20: Costume ]

Mahichu and MimiKuro ClefaLicht and Hydegar

Here’s the thing about the Supernatural “fan movie”. They shot themselves in the foot by having a fan unjustly banned from a con and and then blocking hundreds of fans who said no, this is wrong (Clif, his wife at the time, Mitch, etc., all went on blocking sprees). We’re not going to support a film whose creators treat us that way. Also, putting people in the film who are notorious for bullying, threatening, cajoling fans and being nasty to actors while gossiping about families and secret gay marriages is not a good tone (Kelios, anyone?). They’re also working with WinchesterBros, owned and operated by similar people associated with Kelios who routinely exclude actors and fans they don’t like while claiming to be an all-inclusive fan site. Lastly, the amount of money they want us to donate is more than renting a feature on iTunes. It seems grabby. So if they’re noticing the lack of immediate support, maybe they should ask themselves why. I’ll just be over here not watching the movie like a bad fan.

and then proceeded to not apologize and block people who called them out on it. Now they’re mad that those same people aren’t going to support them when they never even asked for the movie to be made?

As the documentary has been gaining more and more buzz in the fandom, my name is dropped in answer to Clif’s involvement nearly every time. I understand this association between my name and Clif’s, and I have come to terms with it.  However, I have other grounds for concerns with the documentary. In the interests of transparency and clarity:

That Clif factor is obvious. Clif had me photographed, publicly humiliated, and escorted out of Chicon as a “threat” based on a single out-of-context screencap of me bantering with a friend about my supposed “evil” ways, as regards to the gift basket project and what was supposedly a conspiracy of bunnies (Yes that was a ‘concern.’ I was apparently going to infect the cast with Destilence using adorable plush bunnies. No, it’s just as ridiculous as it sounds, which is why I was laughing at it with a friend in the first place).

After that, he tweeted that single screencap to over 80K followers as his justification for having me banned from all future Creation events. Creation later overturned that decision: I have since attended Fri/Saturday at HoustonCon on my own dime, and all four days of VegasCon as Creation’s apology for their part in the events of ChiCon. However, afterwards Clif’s only comment to me (through my editor) was that he didn’t regret it and would do it again, prior to blocking me and anyone who spoke up asking him to retract the accusation. I actually believe he means this: at VegasCon, long after it was proved I had no ill will towards Jared, Jensen, or anyone in SPN, this was my view during the J2 Gold Panel, as Clif planted himself between me and the stage.

As a result of Clif’s actions at ChiCon, I was doxxed. My mother (also in fandom, and protectively outspoken after ChiCon) was doxxed. This means our information was put out there publicly on SPN Gossip and in other places, ensuring that even as I was targeted online, I was not safe offline. Worst of all, my children were threatened in all of this.

Because of how public my removal and his ‘evidence’ against me were, it went into online news articles and made it common knowledge to everyone I know in real life/offline. This led to my ex-husband, with whom I attempt to maintain little contact, collecting these articles and posts detailing the aftermath and legally challenging if my children were “endangered” by the Supernatural fandom and if I needed to relinquish custody. Thankfully that was disregarded, but it still posed a significant real-life scare, as did having to explain Supernatural fanwank to my full-time employers to be able to keep my professional career and to prove I don’t engage in threatening behavior.  

So the Clif aspect of why I will not be investing in this documentary… that’s obvious.

Not as widely publicized but similarly documented are my interactions with NotTheRibbons/Vinnie and KentuckyBecky, of Winchester Bros, who are part of the team behind the documentary.

I know it circulated in fandom that Vinnie dubbed Destiel fans the “Ebola” of the SPN fandom, but that was long after she and I spent months on Twitter as mutual followers debating the finer points of fandom. She went on to inform me that people who like Castiel as their favorite are “disrespecting” Supernatural by focusing on the “wrong thing,” and therefore deserve no respect.

That’s not second-hand. She said these things to me in public Twitter conversation after telling others she could understand if you loved one Winchester brother or the other, but watching any other way was wrong. Outside of our multiple interactions where she was flagrantly adversarial prior to our mutual block, there are the myriad snide comments about fans of my opinion that are common on her timeline.  There are also her remarks on podcasts, including the circulated remarks on Felicia’s acting ability and how Charlie needed to die (and later celebration of that death).

Becky, while not as flagrantly offensive as Vinnie, is by no means blameless in the growing reputation of Winchester Bros as a biased and exclusionary website. When the fandom was discussing their refusal to post Misha’s People’s Choice Award to their website, Becky approached me publicly to say it was her call not to post it, and that she will not: because she found Misha’s fandom annoying for asking her to post it when, after an extended period, they still had not acknowledged it on their purportedly inclusive fansite. Even she acknowledged that it was petty, but so far as I can tell she has no intention to change that. Additionally, they’ve refused to signal boost for Misha’s charity, citing fairness, but do so for Jared’s.

Both Vinnie and Becky will tell you, proudly, that questioning the actions of their site makes no difference whatsoever and that they are above reproof, citing their follower count on Twitter and Facebook and the number of listeners to their podcasts.

And they’re right. Winchester Bros has a large following in fandom. They are welcome to try and drum up funding from it.

They’re not going to be getting it from me.

I’m absolutely certain there are also great people behind this documentary, not just these individuals. It has interviews from cast members whom I admire. There are even fans behind the scenes or in the interviews who are pretty cool, too.

But ultimately, I see this as a vanity project for Clif, Vinnie, et al, and Two Sharks Media twitter confirmed that this is first and foremost Clif’s movie, and the others just helped make it happen. The documentary is also being used as a platform by some of the most hurtful, hateful fans online to prove that they are the “true” fans of Supernatural and deserving of the spotlight given to them by Clif deciding to interview them as representative of our fandom.

My fiance’s flatmate found these photos on her train. There’s an awesome SPN fan out there who went to Asylum14 and got some gorgeous photo ops and now she’s lost them!!

Help me find this person and get their photos back to them!!

Please spread the word

My fiance’s flatmate found these photos on her train. There’s an awesome SPN fan out there who went to Asylum14 and got some gorgeous photo ops and now she’s lost them!!

Help me find this person and get their photos back to them!!

Please spread the word

So whenever there are “omg look at what those “bad slash fans” destihellers are up to!!” accusations going around, be aware that it may in fact be a de facto false flag operation.

(Purging wank from my drafts – please blacklist #wank if you need to!!)

"No matter what shape you’re in, bottom line is, you’re family. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but me and Sam, we don’t have much left. I can’t do this without you.”

The vital importance of adoptive family

"You know what I think Mom would say? Just because you’re blood doesn’t make you family. You gotta earn that.” 

Family of choice established as of greater significance than family of origin

"This isn’t your fight!"

"The hell it isn’t! Family don’t end with blood, boy!”

Affirmation of Bobby Singer’s role as family to the Winchesters

"Next to Sam, you and Bobby are the closest thing I have to family. You’re like a brother to me.”

Establishing both Bobby and Castiel in elevated familial roles (father and brother are of considerable importance to the Winchesters)

"I thought you said that we were like family. Well, I think that too.”

Affirmation of Castiel’s role as family to the Winchesters

"Are you under the impression that family’s supposed to make you feel good? Make you an apple pie, maybe? They’re supposed to make you miserable! That’s why they’re family!”

Family retaining significance even when at odds, no “fair weather” family

"As fate would have it, I adopted two boys. And they grew up great. They grew up heroes.” 

Familial pride, and establishing found family as one of the most significant aspects of Bobby’s life (“Saved the best for last”)

"Saving people, hunting things, the family business? I am down. But I was raised on Tolkien, man. I mean… where is all this? Where’s my quest?”

Affirmation of Charlie Bradbury’s role as family to the Winchesters (first established as “like the little sister I never wanted,” seeking brotherly advice)

"And we need you, man."

"Because I’m useful.”

"Because you’re family. After all the crap we’ve been through, after all the good you’ve done, man, if you don’t think that we would die for you, I don’t know what to tell you. Because you, me, Sam and Cas… we’re all we got.”

Kevin Tran as family to the Winchesters, reinforcement of Castiel as family and that the family is earned and once earned is of significant importance

Yeah, I’ve seen some things (and received some messages at this very blog) that are straight-up libel. Misha is a public figure, which means that we have some more discretion about what we say about him publicly, but the Random Acts volunteers are not, and that means that spreading malicious and baseless rumors about them can result in someone being sued. 

Believe me, when I see a rumor, I check into it. Because certain tax records are public for 501(c)3s, I have access to a lot of details about Random Acts’ finances. I keep track of what the Misha hater club has been saying about Random Acts and try to verify any of the rumors myself. If I saw something that I actually thought was suspicious, I’d let you guys know about it, but so far, the records haven’t been interesting. The most pertinent fact that I can share with you is that Misha gets exactly $0 in compensation from Random Acts every year because he, like the other staff members and directors, is a volunteer. 

[Image: Screenshot of the Random Acts tax form. A the top, it says “Check this box if neither the organization nor any related organization compensated any current officers, direcor, or trustee.” The box is checked. In the personel listing, it reads, “Dmitri Krushnic, President/Treasurer. Average hours per week: 10.00. Position: Individual trustee or director.” Then a row of zeroes for “compensation.”] 

It would be completely legal and ethical for them to pay him for his time, but they don’t. I bring this up because I see people talking about donations to RA as if they were “going into Misha’s pocket.” He may get his expenses (like travel tickets) reimbursed, but that would be it, according to the tax records. If you want to see the tax records yourself, I’d recommend you try ProPublica’s non-profit website and GuideStar. Random Act’s EIN, 04-3276521, is what you should search for if you want to find their records, because they’re listed under different names, as you can see.