I'm not a porn bot. I'm worse. I'm a person.

@team-express

I support women's wrongs. Asks open, pelipper mail is off.

512 posts

Hm, I suppose I should make one of these. Well. Hello, people of rotomblr. I'm very interested in this pelipper mail system of yours! I'm keeping mine inactive, of course. Don't want unexpected things happening.

Oh, they always ask for a name and pronouns.... well, anything but he/him works, but I do have a preference for she/her and it/its. Call me Mx. Express, I really don't care enough to come up with a psuedonym. Honestly, it was bad enough trying to pick a new name the first time.

Well, here I am. I'm not a bot, I am indeed a person. You'll see more of me soon. If you're unlucky.

(ooc below cut)

#pokemon irl #rotomblr #pokeblogging #pokeblog intro

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rotomblr is great because sometimes a murder guy who kills people reblogs your post and you just have to be normal about it

No longer a murder guy. I've transitioned and I'm a woman now. Gods forbid women do anything.

You know what I would love. For these headaches to stop. Before anyone asks, yes I have tried painkillers, no they do not work. I think the only solution is to just be knocked out but unfortunately I have to fix this mess first.

If my body was normal then insane scientists wouldn't want to keep running experiments with my cells and attempting to create monsters they can control for their own benefit. I am so tired. I would like to go home and lay on my couch with my team.

That doesn't sound like an experiment. That sounds like something you do for funding.

Experiments, more often than not, are done in a dozen little test tubes. Funding is done on a big scale with the numbers fudged.

bitches hate me because of my.... bad personality.... paranoid nature... addictive tendencies......the torture basement.

why are you defending evil trans 💀

Too late! Now you're transphobic. Everyone kill this person NOW!

Support evil trans or I will kill you myself.

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I haven't made a bad decision in a while. I'm going to boil some Mountain Dew.

Why??? Why would you do this??? :(

Because I have free will and I want to make potions

Unfortunately that is not how you make potions. that is how you make boiled mountain dew. Syrup, I fear.

Oh not like the Pokémon ones I'm referring to like the fantasy wizard shit.

[An image is embedded. Yep. That's boiling mountain dew.]

Cauldron boil and cauldron bubble, baja blast to fuel my trouble

swiftbluelightning

As a wizard: this is still not how you make potions.

I'm trying to have fun :(

I support your potion making.

Oh shit I’m so sorry dude that ask was not meant for you, that was meant for this teenage girl on the site. So sorry my bad it won’t happen again, definitely not going to dissect you <3 have a nice day!

I. please don't dissect teenage girls either??? what the fuck

It's feminism. Teenage girls should be dissected as well.

HOW ABOUT NO ONE GETS DISSECTED???

I don't recall asking your opinion. That's okay. I can wait.

FOR WHAT???

I can wait.

Oh shit I’m so sorry dude that ask was not meant for you, that was meant for this teenage girl on the site. So sorry my bad it won’t happen again, definitely not going to dissect you <3 have a nice day!

I. please don't dissect teenage girls either??? what the fuck

It's feminism. Teenage girls should be dissected as well.

HOW ABOUT NO ONE GETS DISSECTED???

I don't recall asking your opinion. That's okay. I can wait.

Oh shit I’m so sorry dude that ask was not meant for you, that was meant for this teenage girl on the site. So sorry my bad it won’t happen again, definitely not going to dissect you <3 have a nice day!

I. please don't dissect teenage girls either??? what the fuck

It's feminism. Teenage girls should be dissected as well.

thenextsinnohchampion

Seeing this trend going around or whatever so like. What do you guys think of me.

People have to like me when I'm Champion and I know I'm great already so. Go for it. All those hater anons THIS IS YOUR CHANCE TO FACE ME HEAD-ON

Moderately kidnappable.

thenextsinnohchampion

I fucking hate you.

Yes, why should I care?

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thenextsinnohchampion

Seeing this trend going around or whatever so like. What do you guys think of me.

People have to like me when I'm Champion and I know I'm great already so. Go for it. All those hater anons THIS IS YOUR CHANCE TO FACE ME HEAD-ON

Moderately kidnappable.

Would swimming in lava damage your clothes? We should test your heat tolerance.

...It almost certainly would damage my garb, yes, it was not made to be heat resistant.

I have noticed that I myself am more resistant to heat than I used to be, but presumably there must be a limit...

I’ve got some metalworking tools used for melting down ore. I could test you to see exactly what temperature you can withstand.

HELLO LAWYER LADY I AM THE AMAZING JOHN OTIS AND I REQUIRE ADVICE ON HOW TO TURN THESE 30 COMPLETELY LEGALLY OBTAINED COATS INTO AN ANTI SLEEP MIST SUIT SO I CAN ROB TEA BANKS! @teamrocketboy

...Okay you're either a kid or incredibly foolish, or both, but also I'm morbidly curious as to what a tea bank is

If you want to be immune to sleep powder, you'll want some ppe. That's personal protective equipment, by the way. If you use goggles and an n95 mask with a good seal, you can filter most of it out, but those who work extensively with it end up using a full suit. That said, breathability of the fabric will be an issue.

Sleep powder primarily targets the mucous membranes and lungs, while stun spore can be activated on skin contact. You should be wary in case your target changes tactics.

or just...

chug down a bunch of Awakenings

I did this once and I couldn't fall asleep for 3 days

you also got extremely sick

even better, you get 3 days with no sleep and a day off due to being sick!

...I'm going to regret asking this but is this more or less effective than chugging the equivalent amount of coffee?

way more effective

don't do it tho, this girl almost fell into a comma

just one wouldn't hurt

according to the doctor, it would

So Phoenix probably would be fine but I wouldn't, got it.

So how do I turn the 30 coats I stole into goggles and N95 mask

Kid I think that might be slightly beyond my abilities as a lawyer. I don't make things, I point at them and yell OBJECTION!

You should do more theft. Unless you can do alchemy.

HELLO LAWYER LADY I AM THE AMAZING JOHN OTIS AND I REQUIRE ADVICE ON HOW TO TURN THESE 30 COMPLETELY LEGALLY OBTAINED COATS INTO AN ANTI SLEEP MIST SUIT SO I CAN ROB TEA BANKS! @teamrocketboy

...Okay you're either a kid or incredibly foolish, or both, but also I'm morbidly curious as to what a tea bank is

If you want to be immune to sleep powder, you'll want some ppe. That's personal protective equipment, by the way. If you use goggles and an n95 mask with a good seal, you can filter most of it out, but those who work extensively with it end up using a full suit. That said, breathability of the fabric will be an issue.

Sleep powder primarily targets the mucous membranes and lungs, while stun spore can be activated on skin contact. You should be wary in case your target changes tactics.

man it sounds like virizion got conned. like if i was going to kidnap and torture someone, i'd definitely fake a letter to their friends like that. "I left you of my own free will because I fucking hate you, don't come looking, there's no screaming coming from this place."

...That is a possibility...

...I hope Virizon gets to go, in that case.

...is that so. Interesting! I'll have to take notes.

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next thing you know someone's gonna say that they think cara liss is attractive and i'm gonna have to tell them that she's also a convicted felon.

The only thing attracted to cara liss is my homing ancient power

actualtrainerred

Is her conviction related to her crimes against nature or did she get busted for like, shoplifting from a pokemart

legendsobsessions

Cowards. Can’t a woman find a convicted felon hot in peace? Laws are a social construct made to cage us.

i would have beat her up even if what she did wasn't a crime because she tortured pokemon for her own personal gain

laws are a construct, being the cause of the suffering of other living beings is evil

Morals are also a social construct, I'll kiss her with tongue.

no offense

you disgust me

You sprinkle useless politeness into your sentences. If you loathe me, at least have the guts to say it to my face. If we ever meet, I’m taking your kidney as a souvenir.

next thing you know someone's gonna say that they think cara liss is attractive and i'm gonna have to tell them that she's also a convicted felon.

The only thing attracted to cara liss is my homing ancient power

actualtrainerred

Is her conviction related to her crimes against nature or did she get busted for like, shoplifting from a pokemart

legendsobsessions

Cowards. Can’t a woman find a convicted felon hot in peace? Laws are a social construct made to cage us.

i would have beat her up even if what she did wasn't a crime because she tortured pokemon for her own personal gain

laws are a construct, being the cause of the suffering of other living beings is evil

Morals are also a social construct, I'll kiss her with tongue.

I'm not a porn bot. I'm worse. I'm a person. @team-express - Tumblr Blog | Tumlook