I’m sure there’s some stuff there but I love how little angst show!ilya has about his attraction to men. he’s like I loaded up so much on other emotional issues I ran out of disk space for internalized homophobia
his own brother calls him the f slur and ilya’s like oh my goddd you’re so fucking annoying you think I have time to care about that? I’m 1000% locked in on my daddy issues and dead mom trauma get with the program lyosha!!
Book!Ilya also doesn't have time to care about this. He really only has anxiety about it, when it pertains to the possibility of Russian jail time. Past that, he's cool.
He told his therapist, when he figured out he was bi, as a teenager, it made him feel more evolved and enlightened than those around him. Which tracks. A lot of my bi friends said that kinda shit, when we were younger.
