ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to miss the application window

snacks will make me powerful. sweets will make me wise

do not let awesome music distract you from the fact that american football is a ruse & inherently evil

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and may god guide the seattle seahawks in their holy war against the diabolical new england patriots

tag your superbowl spoilers

Tom Brady dies

okay dont be mad but i just scheduled you for every appointment ever. you have an open house on tuesday and a doctor is removing your all of it tomorrow 👍

freeze frame. yeah, thats me. you might be wondering if thats me. yeah its me. ok thanks. unfreezes frame