this probably will not get finished so take it as it is ☕
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
h
trying on a metaphor
$LAYYYTER
occasionally subtle

if i look back, i am lost
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

titsay
wallacepolsom
Stranger Things

roma★
art blog(derogatory)
Cosmic Funnies
KIROKAZE
cherry valley forever

blake kathryn
DEAR READER
ojovivo

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣

oozey mess

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@tatoasting
this probably will not get finished so take it as it is ☕

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Putting this under a break bc its like. Word soup down there. About that date I was gonna go on. TLDR: I didnt go on the date & we're just gonna be friends bc I think shes going through too much rn & so am I
Okay okay. Let me. Explain.
So I didnt go on the date with the pretty transfem. Thats fine. Its *city* there are like a million of those here. My partner wasnt ready for opening the relationship like this & thats fine. A little sad but thats just the process. But we did hang out, gamenight style, with some other friends. And she left early and texted me a bunch about how she likes me too much & cant just be friends & thinks me and my partner are really good together but couldnt stop thinking about their crush on me. And I like. Didnt know how to respond really so I just said I was glad she came & we all enjoyed getting to know her bc thats true. She is cool. I wish we could be friends.
And then today she texts me. Saying she hopes we see eachother at more raves. Like.. implying that she does still want to be friends? Which. Cool. Yea. I guess shes just struggling with it in the moment but is excited to get to hang again in a more comfy environment for her and not in me and my partners marital home. Thats fair. I understand how that could have been awkward for her. We were all also a little anxious high. (Me least of all but I did take a hit bc peer pressure. Oops.)
Idk man. Its just like. Super weird breaking into this sort of way of thinking. Like, ugh. Idk. I hope we can be friends. I hope shes just freaking out bc shes actively moving & very stressed & probably going through something. And everything goes well over time. As we all settle into knowing eachother & stuff. And that one day they and my partner get along & I still feel the way I do & things can progress. But its going to have to take TIME and I am realizing that thats okay now. I got so caught up in my emotions bc everything was so intense and sudden but realistically. Taking things slow is the right way to do it. And its still possible to slowly make everything work. Plus also, hopefully, we can just be friends to be friends. I dont need to worry about what could come after that. So what we both think eachother are pretty. I think a lot of my friends are pretty. All of them possibly even. That doesnt mean I have to like,, do anything about it. Sigh.
So I feel like things are calming down and things are okay but I also still feel.. stressed about it. Like theres a way I can fix this now but it has to be me and I have to be perfect. And like... no one is putting that pressure on me but me. Chill out girl. Draw some shit and listen to music everything will be alright.
Anyway this disability pride month I would like to shoutout disabled folks whose creativity has suffered because of their condition. I’m talking people with hand tremors and pain that stop them from drawing, knitting, and playing instruments. People whose thinking has become so disorganized that nothing they write makes sense to other people. People with chronic pain who can no longer dance. People so over medicated in a fruitless attempt to maintain stability that the wells of their imagination have run dry.
I see you and I love you. You are more than your creative output. You are not a shell of what you used to be. You are a whole, complete person, regardless of what your creativity has been, is now, or will be in the future.
Yesterday was a lot of fun :) I went to a furry event & it was so cool, everyone there was so kind!! Someone complimented my fucked up teeth & someone else told me I have a good nose. Those are two of my three biggest face insecurities, and its just really nice to have people like... be so kind as to point out that they like these unique things about me :) & to be fair, the furry community is a good place to have a unique face bc we're all animals here & all my natural animal features have a place! Idk I just.. am feeling really good about myself rn :)
Literally as I wrote this one of them asked me out. On a date. *Short circuits.*
Yesterday was a lot of fun :) I went to a furry event & it was so cool, everyone there was so kind!! Someone complimented my fucked up teeth & someone else told me I have a good nose. Those are two of my three biggest face insecurities, and its just really nice to have people like... be so kind as to point out that they like these unique things about me :) & to be fair, the furry community is a good place to have a unique face bc we're all animals here & all my natural animal features have a place! Idk I just.. am feeling really good about myself rn :)

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My beads come today!!!
I just watched my cat eat a moth..

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The recent hot VS cold polls have made me realise that a lot of people have no idea how to cool down.
As someone from a hot country that's regularly on fire, here's some tips:
WATER IS YOUR FRIEND! WATER! IS! YOUR! FRIEND! You can transfer SO much heat into this bad boy! You cannot cool down without water!
Wrists under the cold tap. Splash your face and the back of your neck. Fan yourself.
In some countries you can buy a little handeld fan with a water sprayer.
Damp tea towel around the neck. Stick an ice pack in there on hotter days.
Half fill a water bottle with water, stick in freezer. If you use a bottle with a straw, make sure it's lying on its side with the straw side up and out of the water. When frozen top up the rest of the way with tap water and off you go.
Desperate to cool off? Wet T-shirt. Sit in front of a fan. This will nuke it, just don't get hypothermia and don't fall asleep like this.
Cold showers are also your friend in summer. Some people get psyched up by these. Personally, I sleep like a baby, so I'm good to have them before bed. Just keep in mind that it takes a bit of time for the cool to circulate, so your body will tell you that you're colder than you actually are. I find that when I have cold showers I need to step out of the spray when I think I'm cold... I'll just wait, and thirty seconds later the temperature has evened out and I actually need to step under again. Rinse and repeat until you maintain coolness even after stepping out for a bit.
If you can't do cold showers, turn the cold shower on anyway and just stick your arms under. When they're cold, lift your arms up above your head. The sensation of cool blood draining into your body is fucking weird and kinda unpleasant but less unpleasant than being hot.
Feet in a tub of water with ice. Blood naturally flows to your extremities when hot, so take advantage of this. If you don't have a tub of ice water, sticking a wet rag on your feet in front of the fan works too, it's the less powerful version of the wet T-shirt.
Drinks lots of water but make sure that water has electrolytes as well. Stay in the shade.
Keep air circulating. Fans don't actually cool rooms down, they just help transfer heat from your body to the moisture on your skin or the air via evaporative cooling.
Block north facing windows early in the morning so the sun doesn't get in. If you're in the northern hemisphere, this is opposite for you. Keep in mind that if your home is brick, the bricks will still heat up and slowly release heat into your home even after the sun goes down so this will only do so much.
If it's hotter inside than outside, close all your windows but two, making sure they're on opposite sides of the house/unit you're in. Point a fan out of one window, making sure that the doors between the rooms with the open windows are all open. This will help create a mini pressure system in your home, pulling cooler air in and pushing the hotter air out via the fan. Bonus points if you can get that fan high up where the hot air rises; even within a single room the top is much hotter than the air by the floor. Adjust the amount of open windows based on how many fans you have, but generally you want more windows with fans open than windows without fans to keep the pressure correct.
Obviously, use your common sense for these. Not everything WILL work for you, just use the stuff that does and adjust what needs to be adjusted. Some of these will be impossible to use in the workplace but others you can still use. Others are best used at home. If humidity impacts your ability to use any of these, get a dehumidifier if that's an option, or use more ice instead of evaporation.
Also keep in mind that the skinnier you are, the faster these will work. More fat means more insulation, means more heat, so you may need to be more patient with some of these or use them in combination.
Bringing this back for my dying mutuals
resurrected dead wife watching her own montage: wow I looked so hot in that
I wanna have a cool fursona but I think I'm too autistic. Ive got wolf in... grey. And brown bear. I think my favorite things about animals are that they are the way they are & I struggle to change that. I love other peoples fursonas in bright & obscure colors! I just can't do that fur myself.
Anyways I'm making my own outfit for a furry event & I'm. Very nervous and very excited about it!! I almost bought stuff to make my bear orange instead of brown but brown is literally my favorite color so why wouldnt I make it brown?? I like brown bears...
Making my tattoo artist a bracelet bc they were so dang sweet & I wanna give something back >.< its their instagram name & I'm making it sortof half black&neon colors & half white&grey bc. Idk thats just the vibe ig. Im considering adding a pastel pink or something to the white side but aa idk yet!! My body has given up on me bc I took my meds hella late but now ive taken my meds I'm HAPPY. Just chilling in the living room until my phone dies or I finish this bracelet or I fall asleep :3

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kids were roleplaying with minecraft figurines and one of them had their figure go up to the other and say “i’m in love with you” and the other one replied “sword slash to the chest. and you’re on fire”
Oh I havent been on Tumblr im too busy not having depression anymore. Aaaanyways, I got my first tattoo. I "made it look easy" :3 which is cool bc some transfem was screaming as loud as she could in the backyard & it made me feel really powerful but it was also very intense lol. Gotta love my local punk scene (bc theyre all so wonderful and awesome mwahmwah) and ive been doing a really good job at leaving the house every day despite not working! I'm really lucky to be having such a fun pride month thanks to all my wonderful friends and neighbors <3 there has been a lot going on lately & most of it is positive. Really only random small details are bad rn. The rest of my life is preeetty awesome. Take that suicidal 11-20 and briefly again at 22 year old me!!
Though most of my life has been spent suffering, making myself out to be the biggest sufferer of all time, struggling to claw my way out of complete helplessness, never feeling good enough, never feeling cared about, etc etc etc forever. The times when it is good makes those times feel so trivial. Not to say those times didnt matter, it just doesnt FEEL as big as it used to. It feels like I am crafting a life worth living. And I know this time will pass, I likely will fall right back down into the pits I'm used to one of these days when money gets low or my social battery stops holding its charge. Then I will worry about then, and now I will worry about now. And now is no worries!!
+I am still doing little things for future me. Setting up plans to keep myself busy and feeling good. Taking my meds so I dont chemically fizzle out. Trying to buy things that will make me feel happier and more confident. Giving myself a bigger social safety net. Taking pictures to remember how fun right now was.