#zelest

- How can you think my feelings for you are a lie? - Because that is who you are, Radovid, at your core.

I kind of loved that, when Jaskier finally decided that he'd had enough and fought back against his bully in "Sirens of the Deep", he knew exactly what to say to hit Zelest where it would hurt him the most.

It showed that, even as a child, Jaskier was highly aware of the power of words, perceptive of other people's deepest fears and unresolved issues, and vicious enough to target those directly for threatening things and/or people he holds dear.

I also found it interesting that Zelest is the bastard son of a king that spent his whole life trying to prove himself to him in the hopes of finally being worthy of his father's love and recognition.

And that, the very moment King Usveldt finally gave Zelest what he thought he'd been after all along - the very moment that he finally said "watch yourself, son" - in a last-ditch attempt to maintain his power and control over him - was the moment where Zelest realized that he no longer wanted it!

Jaskier left Bremervoord to become who he wanted to be. Zelest stayed, trying to gain the love, approval and acceptance of someone that simply had none to give.

Zelest, as a child, felt so small and vulnerable, that he kept overcompensating by picking on those that he perceived as being even smaller and more vulnerable than himself to make himself feel bigger and stronger.

And, as an adult, he essentially became a vessel for his father's prejudices and cruelty.

But that isn't who he is. And,the very second King Usveldt realized that he'd lost his hold over Zelest - the very second he no longer had any use for him - he called him nothing but a mistake that he'd always wanted to erase, and ordered his death!

He even implied that the only reason he was willing to put up with how much of a disappointment his legitimate son, Agloval, was to him, was because of his obsession with his own legacy!

And I was truly glad that Jaskier was there to witness Zelest finally having the courage to take a stand against the person that had caused them both so much pain (as Zelest's own issues had caused him to take that pain out on Jaskier), and to reveal himself to be someone fundamentally honorable, that would rather fight to protect others than push for senseless war.

I was glad that Jaskier got to fully witness just how bad things had been for Zelest, and where all that hurt, pain and violence had come from.

Not because that justified any of what Jaskier himself (and others) had been through at the hands of Zelest nor made everything okay again.

But it opened the door for the two of them to really start healing from their respective traumas, better understand it, and move on.

For Jaskier, more specifically, it gave him the chance to understand that he'd never deserved any of this, and to gain some recognition and respect from the person (Zelest) that used to redirect his own suffering on him.

And the saddest part, perhaps, was that no one appeared to mourn Zelest's loss, or truly be affected by it, in the end, besides Jaskier.

When Geralt mentioned that Usveldt used to have two sons, and now he had none, it was clear that the king still only cared about how Zelest's loss affected him.

As for Agloval, I suppose that he wouldn't have been too inclined to discuss his half-brother's death with his heartless father - so maybe he did mourn him off screen, at the very least, but the movie never showed it.

Zelest's violent death, however, caused Jaskier enough emotional distress for him to pick up Zelest's sword in the aftermath, and launch himself at a group of vodyanoys that hadn't even appeared to have been paying any attention to him until then (even that first one that Jaskier attacked had to turn around a bit to better face him... So, it really looks like the first blow came from Jaskier, not the other way around!)!

Jaskier went from having fantacized about Zelest dying of syphilis in a debtor prison half blind, crazed and salivating...

To being so upset about his death, that he stupidly grabbed the man's sword and tried taking on four freaking vodyanoys at once on his own (I'm sorry, but more than ever, I'm 100% convinced that this bard has a solid case of ADHD!)!

Because, shortly before reaching that point, Jaskier had heard Zelest openly acknowledge that he had been right to leave, and then he'd seen him pull the same "plank trick" that he'd used to torment him back in the days, but to save his and Geralt's lives with it this time around instead.

Zelest took a painful memory that they both shared, and used it to protect Jaskier and someone he loves.

And, from the way we could see Jaskier smile in that scene, it seemed that Zelest had just successfully managed to go from a personal tormentor to a personal hero in Jaskier's heart.

The moment Zelest finally allowed himself to stop trying to please others and embrace who he is instead - the moment he stopped being a potential threat to Jaskier to instead adopt a protective role towards him - I think Jaskier genuinely fell in love and connected with him in the puppy-like way he often does with people.

All the unconditional love, acceptance, understanding, and admiration that Zelest had spent his whole life searching in his father's eyes, he finally received from Jaskier - the boy he used to have fun tormenting - instead.

And then, the sea witch took him, Jaskier lost him, and the grief really hit him!

Zelest was both loved and mourned by a person that had every reason to hate him, while the one person he'd devoted his whole life to only wished him dead.

A part of me really wishes that Zelest would have been given a happier ending - one where he'd have had the chance to experience a life free from his father's toxic influence, and free to fully figure out who he is - but life is often unfair, sadly, and rarely about what one deserves.

So while, in the presence of someone that he perceives as a (potential) threat, Jaskier has been known to be very effective when it comes to the art of throwing salt on the biggest exposed, bleeding wound he can find...

(Ex:

Zelest: Not being "good enough" to be worthy of his father's love and recognition.

Radovid: Yearning for a sincere connection with someone that can see and love him for who he is, rather than who he needs to pretend to be to keep himself safe at court.)

...it seems that, when that person ceases to be an immediate (potential) threat to him, and Jaskier's given the chance to take a good glimpse at the reasons that pushed them to say and do those stupid things, then Jaskier's ability to forgive, love, and care for them is incredibly huge.

But confusing...

So, so confusing...

Poor Radovid...

Although I do admire how fast he can recover!

Zelaskier?

Rating: Explicit

Category: M/M

Fandom: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher: Sirens of the Deep

Relationship: Zelest/Jaskier

Tags: canon divergence, happy ending, getting together, friends to lovers, More tags on Ao3

Summary: With Prince Agloval joining Sh'eenaz in the water, Zelest is left as King Usveldt's primary heir. Jaskier ends up chatting with Zelest during the wedding afterparty, which leads to more than he or Zelest planned, including a bit of fun.