When Yuri got back, his bladder blessedly empty, JJ was stretched out in bed, one arm under his head as he grinned at Yuri.

“Sorry about that, Kitten, I had no idea I was on my way to giving you a UTI.”

“You're like a limpet in sleep, has anyone ever told you that?” Yuri groused as he got back into bed, tugging the blankets across his hips, while JJ reached out to urge him closer.

“How am I like a limpet?”

“You cling to things and don't let go.”

“What can I say?” JJ purred as he leant in for a light kiss. “I see what I want, and I grab hold of it, damn the consequences.”

“That part I know,” Yuri replied with a humourless smile. “That's sort of how we got into this mess.”

“Well it didn't turn out all bad, did it?”

“Not really, no, but...”

“But you still feel guilty?” JJ asked, and Yuri nodded a little, his mouth twisted into a grimace.

“Otabek's still tagging me in the occasional nasty tweet, but now that he's not shitfaced it's more passive-aggressive.”

“That sounds more like him,” JJ remarked as he coaxed Yuri to lie down, and JJ immediately spooned around him. “He's never been all that...vocal.”

“Yeah, I just...I didn't mean to hurt him...he's usually a good man, right now he's just hurting.”

“Usually being the key word,” JJ replied with a sour note to his voice. “He can't switch on and off, that's not how people work.”

“He was never like this before,” Yuri mumbled sadly, “it was my...our stupid affair that made him like this.”

“No one made him turn into a Grade-A douchebag,” JJ replied simply, “that was all him.”

“But—”

“—no,” JJ interrupted sternly. “Don't go blaming yourself for his shitty attitude. He decided to flip out on you over this, and there are a million ways he could've reacted, but he chose to get royally pissed and kick you out. None of that is your fault.”

“It feels like my fault...”

“What will make it not feel like your fault?” JJ asked while he leant in to nibble at Yuri's ear, which caused him to squirm and rotate his shoulders at the tickling sensation.

“I don't know...a lobotomy?”

“What about brunch?” JJ asked, “Crêpes with whipped cream and strawberries and more coffee than you can drink, or omelettes and orange slices, or eggs and toast and sausage...”

“Are you hinting that you want to go out for brunch?” Yuri asked dryly, and JJ grinned.

“See? You're already reading my mind, Kitten. We were made for each other.”

~*~

After getting dressed and layering on their jackets, scarves, and boots, JJ slung an arm over Yuri's shoulders as he escorted him to the elevator and down to the subterranean garage. Not one but three spots were reserved for JJ, in which there was a black mustang, a red corvette, and a shiny black motorcycle. The latter made Yuri's stomach twinge with regret, but thankfully JJ was not stupid enough to ride a motorcycle around in the dead of winter, and chose the corvette.

“It's the only one with winter tires,” JJ explained after he got in and fished out his keys. “I never got around to doing to mustang.”

“This is fine,” Yuri replied, “I normally bussed everywhere, I never got around to getting my license...”

“It's expensive as hell out here, so probably better that you didn't,” JJ replied with a short laugh as he backed out of the spot while Yuri fiddled with the radio, eventually settling on a station that claimed to be oldies rock, but played stuff from the late nineties and early two thousands like The Killers, Green Day, and Avenged Sevenfold.

They didn't go far, and after a ten-minute drive they pulled into a diner called Chez Cora. The 'o' in Cora had been replaced by a rising sun, and the parking lot was packed with cars.

“Saturday morning,” JJ said with a wince, “I hope we don't have to wait...”

“We could always go somewhere else...”

“No,” JJ interrupted stubbornly, “it's in the rulebook, Chez Cora is the only brunch place worth going to. If you suggest we go to McDonalds, I will divorce you.”

“We're not married, you moron,” Yuri replied with a snort of laughter, which JJ answered to with another one of his obnoxious 'winning' smiles.

“Come on, even if we have to wait, it's so worth it.”

JJ promptly dragged Yuri from the vehicle, pausing just long enough to lock it before he threw his arm over Yuri's shoulders again and led him towards the restaurant. Despite JJ's stubborn insistence, Yuri was somewhat inclined to agree with him. He'd been to Chez Cora once or twice with Viktor and his Katsudon, and the food was always good, if a little blandly Canadien.

Yuri followed JJ inside, where he jabbered animatedly with the hostess in French, and she plucked two plastic-encased menus off her stand as she chatted with him.

“See?” JJ purred in Yuri's ear, switching to English as the hostess turned and led them away. “JJ charm is all we need to snag a table.”

Yuri snorted derisively, but at the same time put an arm at JJ's back, leaning into his embrace.

“It's amazing to me how humble you are,” Yuri replied dryly, and JJ chuckled. They wove through the restaurant, teeming with families, couples, and groups of friends all enjoying weekend brunch, and distantly, he heard the smash of some kind of glass or ceramic hit the floor—a kid—presumably.

After they were seated they were brought a French Press of coffee and two mugs, along with a tiny basket of plastic creams and packets of sugar and splenda. Both Yuri and JJ ignored the dairy and sugar products as they poured their coffee black.

“This is...loud,” Yuri remarked, and JJ chuckled.

“Popular place, Kitten, of course it's loud.”

Yuri kicked JJ under the table at the nickname, but it was halfhearted, and the small smile on his face never wavered. The Canadien ignored him as he buried his nose in the plasticized menu and sipped the hot coffee. Yuri mirrored him, just as a waitress sidled up to their table to take their orders. JJ asked for some sort of crêpe monstrosity that was more dessert than breakfast, and Yuri asked for the Cabane special—a Québecois symphony of meat products and beans, with toast. The waitress noted it down and took back their menus, and at the same moment Yuri felt a foot hook around his ankle as JJ smiled warmly at him.

“See this is so nice. Just you, and me, and brunch,” JJ said, his voice once more dropping to that warm, decidedly un-JJ tone of voice that he seemed to reserve only for Yuri. Yuri felt a flush creep up his neck at the words, and hid behind his mug in an effort to conceal his embarrassment, because despite all the other shit going on, JJ was right—it was nice.

“What are you enjoying more,” Yuri asked as he reached for one of the complimentary packets of jam, and fiddled with it absentmindedly, “the brunch or me?”

“Oh the brunch, definitely,” JJ teased, offering Yuri another grin before he picked his coffee back up and sipped it. “I can eat brunch in public, you, I have to wait til we get home.”

“I dimly recall a few public blow jobs...” Yuri replied with a small smirk, and JJ snorted.

“Yeah, well...” JJ trailed off, and Yuri's smirk widened as he registered what he was seeing—JJ was blushing.

Yuri logged that bit of information away for later use just as their platters of food arrived, and the pair dug in.

Yuri genuinely had no idea what everyone thought was so great about this place, but he thought better than to voice it as he broke the pastry of his miniature tourtière and the sweet scent of spiced meat hit his nose. The food was okay, all things considered, but boring. And yet, the place was overloaded with customers. JJ himself seemed to be enjoying his crêpe monstrosity that seemed to be more whipped cream than anything else, so much so that he seemed more keen to eat than engage Yuri in conversation.

“God, I'm being a terrible date, stuffing my face and not talking to you,” JJ said suddenly, as though he'd read Yuri's mind. “Want to try a bit?”

Yuri glanced up from his own meal to see JJ holding out a forkful of crêpe, strawberry, and whipped cream. He wasn't much for sweets in the morning, but the hopeful and endearing look in JJ's eyes was impossible to say no to, and instead Yuri offered up a small shrug.

“Sure, why not,” he said as he opened his mouth to accept the bite.

And, of course, that happened to be same moment that Yuuri Cockblock Katsuki had to intrude on their meal.

“Oh. My. God. Yurio? Is that you?”

A string of choice Russian expletives slipped from Yuri's mouth after he'd swallowed the forkful, and he turned to see Yuuri with Viktor in tow, both of them staring at Yuri and JJ like one might regard an alien from outer space.

“What?” Yuri asked, his voice a little thick from the cream clinging to the inside of his mouth, while JJ busied himself with his coffee and miraculously, did not say a word.

“Who the hell else would it be?”

“But why are you here with JJ?” Yuuri asked, while behind him Viktor pressed his lips together to hide a smile. Clearly, Katsudon was still a bit slow on the uptake.

“We're going tenpin bowling,” Yuri replied sarcastically, and JJ snorted. “What do you think?”

“It's our first real date,” JJ offered, and Yuri kicked him under the table.

“Date?” Yuuri sputtered, his eyes almost comically wide. “Date?”

“That's what he said,” Yuri said, caught somewhere between embarrassment and amusement at Viktor and Yuuri's wildly different reactions.

“So you must have been who Otabek was bitching about on Twitter the other day,” Viktor said with a warm laugh. “That explains a lot.”

“So, you two...” Yuuri trailed off, the comical surprise never fading from his eyes as he glanced from Yuri to JJ and back again. He did this several times, as though his brain and eyes couldn't agree on what they were witnessing. “How long?”

“Um...” Yuri looked over to JJ, who offered him a small shrug, and went for his coffee.

“Depends on what you mean by how long,” JJ said, and Katsudon frowned disapprovingly at the response.

“I mean how long, what do you mean?”

“But do you mean how long Yuri and I have been hopelessly, madly, infatuatingly in love, or do you mean how long have we been secretly fucking?”

Yuri rolled his eyes and kicked JJ under the table again, while Yuuri flushed a deep scarlet, and Viktor seemed to be trying to keep from laughing.

“Technically, it's our first real date,” Yuri said, and JJ grinned at him. The simple explanation made Yuuri flush again. “What?”

“But...Yurio...Have you thought about Otabek at all?” Yuuri asked, “he's all alone and you're just...living it up?”

“Otabek is the one who threw me out,” Yuri replied, “he practically yanked off my ring and tossed me out onto the street, then got hammered and spread it all over Twitter. So why exactly would I think about him after all that? Yeah, JJ and I were in the wrong doing what we did—I'm not stupid, I know that—but Otabek went way too far. One tiny indiscretion turned him into a raging asshole, and that's not right, either.”

“Oh, but...” Yuuri looked from Yuri to JJ and back again, his bottom lip caught between his teeth and his expression deeply troubled. Thankfully, Viktor seemed to sense that they were intruding on a private moment, and now was most certainly not the time for an intervention from the Morality Police.

“Come on, Yuuri,” Viktor said as he wrapped an arm around the other man, and spoke in a low tone that made Yuuri blush, “let's leave them to their date, and we can all talk about it later, okay?” Viktor shifted his gaze to Yuri, and offered the fellow Russian a fatherly smile, which made Yuri scowl. “Cкоро приедете на yжин?”

Yuri scowled.

“Ты не мой отец, Виктор,” Yuri replied sourly, and Viktor laughed.

“What are they saying?” JJ hissed at Yuuri in a stage whisper.

“Viktor's doing the fatherly thing again,” Yuri filled in before Yuuri could answer.

“Well your grandpa and parents are allllll the way over in Russia, it's the least I can do to show some hospitality to your new boyfriend!” Viktor said as he fingered a wave at Yuri. “Think about it, Yurio, we'd be happy to have you over.”

Without another word, Viktor wrapped an arm around Yuuri's shoulders and led him away.

“I'm suddenly feeling like I never got the full Viktor and Yuuri experience before just now,” JJ remarked as he dug back into the remnants of his brunch, spearing a glazed strawberry and holding it up at eye level. “Are they always like that?”

“If you mean, are they always acting like my fathers, then unfortunately, yes,” Yuri replied grumpily. “I'm not that much younger than them, but they still insist on treating me like I'm ten. It's so stupid.”

“I dunno, you get this...patchy blush thing then you get really mad, it's adorable,” JJ teased, and began to laugh when Yuri glared at him.

~*~

After brunch, Yuri was far too full to even suggest something ridiculous like going to practice, and instead JJ dragged Yuri back to his condo for mint tea (which he claimed would help them feel less full) and he learned something about JJ that he did not expect.

The man was a total weeb.

“Look, JJ, I don't care if you insist on making me watch this shit, but can you please make it something other than this Magical Girl stuff? Nobody loves Cardcaptor Sakura this much.”

“Yuri, you're so mean!” JJ cried from the floor where he was sifting through a stack of Blu-ray discs. “Everyone loves Cardcaptor Sakura!”

“I bet you're the president of the Cardcaptor Sakura Fan Club too,” Yuri mumbled, and JJ laughed.

“Co-founder. Too busy being the president of the King JJ Fan Club to devote all my time to Sakura.”

“JJ Girls are so annoying, Yuri Angels are way better,” Yuri replied on reflex, and JJ laughed out loud.

“You're adorable when you're all defensive of your rabid fans, Kitten,” JJ teased as he finally settled on a disc and popped it in. Thankfully, it turned out to be Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children instead of more Cardcaptor Sakura. JJ got off the floor and snuggled up to Yuri on the sofa, dragging him close as he draped the woven blanket over them, and Potya curled up at the opposite end near their feet.

Outside, large puffy snowflakes fluttered past the window as Yuri curled up with JJ. Normally, movie nights (or afternoons, in this case) Yuri found painfully boring; he had always enjoyed spending time with Otabek (prior to his wild attitude switch) but he always got antsy when they did anything low-key, like an evening of movies or board games.

With JJ, Yuri was amazed by how much he liked it. He felt none of the old lack of attention span resurfacing, only a strange sense of peace.

Maybe this is a sign that Otabek and I really weren't meant to be, and JJ is...the one?

Yuri felt himself blush a deep scarlet, and grabbed the mug of herbal tea to hide the reaction. When had he gotten so cheesy?

“Oh, this is my favourite part!”

JJ's voice drew Yuri out of his musings, and he watched as the older man, childlike, grinned wildly and pointed at the screen. This time, Yuri didn't have a caustic or sarcastic remark for him, but instead smiled indulgently as he snuggled into JJ's side and turned his attention to the movie.

A/N: “Cкоро приедете на yжин?”(Skoro priyedete na uzhin?) - “Come for dinner soon?”/“Ты не мой отец, Виктор,” (Ty ne moy otets, Viktor) - “You're not my father, Viktor.” This is according to Google Translate, and I didn't have time to have it double-checked, so if the grammar is off, please let me know so I can fix it! :)

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