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( ✉ → sms ) i csnst stop throwiging up // ( ✉ → sms ) why do they say drugs are bad when they make you feel so good
( ✉ → sms ) i csnst stop throwiging up
↳( ✉ → 🍭) sam↳ ( ✉ → 🍭) e ↳ ( ✉ → 🍭) we def neeed to hihh fivw onve we stop
( ✉ → sms ) why do they say drugs are bad when they make you feel so good
↳ ( ✉ → 🍭) bc the man like to tear us down obvs↳ ( ✉ → 🍭) speaking of drugs i have some w/ our names on it 😏
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( ✉ → sms ) plea se eh elep me im drunk and i dotn know whe re i am // ( ✉ → sms ) [ File Attached ] of all the drunk pictures i have of you, this one is my favorite.
( ✉ → sms ) plea se eh elep me im drunk and i dotn know whe re i am
( ✉ → yeonghwan ) yeonghwan ?? where did you go?( ✉ → yeonghwan ) you always run around after curfew ! what’s around you ?? anything you can identify ? i’ll come get you.
( ✉ → sms ) [ File Attached ] of all the drunk pictures i have of you, this one is my favorite.
( ✉ → yeonghwan ) oh my god( ✉ → yeonghwan ) delete that please( ✉ → yeonghwan ) when did you even take that ?? i don’t remember that !! ( ✉ → yeonghwan ) where did i even find a chicken ????
“people lie all the time.”
“that’s true,” she muttered quietly in agreement. lies were a fact of life. hell, their whole group lied on a daily basis just to survive; they lied to keep themselves alive. this wasn’t brand new information that soojin was receiving. “there are all kinds of lies and all kinds of reasons people tell them. some are good lies, some are bad lies -- most if not all lies are selfish.” soojin couldn’t really make eye contact with yeonghwan. there was just something about them that always had her on edge. they intimidated her but not in the sense that she was afraid of them. they intimidated her in the sense that she wanted desperately to be accepted by them; to be looked upon favorably by them. “but i wouldn’t lie to you ... not about this.” she NOTICED things, things that many people would prefer she didn’t. she noticed them. “you deserve more than you think you do. i know it probably doesn’t mean anything to you coming from me, but you do.” their entire loop was a bunch of messed up, broken kids on the run for the lives. there were no second chances and no time for mistakes. one wrong move could mean the end of them all. it was a heavy burden for anyone to bear and combined with all the things they’d bared witness to, it was a miracle any of them got up in the morning. soojin sat across from yeonghwan, wringing her hands and doing her best to come up with the right words. she didn’t know how to say what she wanted to say. she didn’t know how to offer comfort to them. she didn’t know how to offer understanding without coming off as if she were lecturing them. soojin didn’t know a lot of things so all she could do was sit there, like a fool. “you deserve forgiveness -- especially from yourself.”
▤ ✮
▤ = falling asleep on them
She startled awake as she felt a thump against her shoulder. Soojin blinked her eyes repeatedly as she tried to get her bearings. The last thing she remembered, she had been sitting on the couch and watching a movie with Yeonghwan (after pleading and begging for them to sit with her.) She figured she must have dozed off. As her brain slowly started processing her surroundings, Soojin realized she felt an added weight on her shoulder and glanced down. Yeonghwan must have fallen asleep too. They looked so peaceful and she felt a small wave of guilt at forcing them to stay up and watch a movie with her, when she hadn’t even been able to stay awake for it. They must have been exhausted, yet they still gave in to her childish demand. She tilted her head, content at observing how innocent Yeonghwan looked in that rare moment of vulnerability that was sleep. She felt something in her chest warm up and spread throughout her body until she felt warm all over. Soojin shook her head, and tilted it to rest on Yeonghwan’s head, smiling shyly to herself before allowing herself to fall back asleep.
✮ = stargazing
“ So, can you see that constellation ? It looks like a man holding up a shield ? That’s Orion ! He was a a wonderful hunter who once claimed he could kill all the animals on Earth. Mother Nature didn’t really like that so according to legend, she sent a giant scorpion to kill him. After his death, Zeus put Orion in the sky and he put the scorpion too ! But, anyways, the reason I brought it up is because of that star right there. That really bright, red-orangey one ! You’ll never guess it’s name ! Betelgeuse ! Funny, right ? ” Soojin had been enthusiastically sharing the history of almost every constellation in sight for the past twenty minutes before realizing Yeonghwan had barely said a world. “ Oh, I’m sorry. I’ve been talking too much, haven’t I ? ” Soojin bowed her head in an apology before glancing back up at the sky. “ People always think stars are so dainty and pretty. They don’t realize how much power and destruction they have to go through for us to even be able to see their pretty glow. Betelgeuse is like that. And no one knows its fate right now ... Betelgeuse is going to explode into a supernova one day and then after that it could turn into a neutron star or even a-a black hole, ” she murmured, her voice tapering off quietly. “ Sorry. I’m rambling. I just meant to say ... I’m thankful you’re letting me rattle on like this. Most people just want to look at the stars and don’t really care about their stories. I think they’re important. We all have a story to tell, right ? And we need to share them so people remember us when we’re gone. So, I want us to share as many stories together as possible, okay, Yeonghwan ? ” Soojin grinned brightly at them, offering them her blanket.
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🌠 🐾 ☔️ 🐧
🌠 if you were in charge of the world, what would the world look like?
well, the world would have less wars, for sure. the world would be calmer, saying that someone who isn’t lusting over power would be in charge. but of course, there would be people who wouldn’t want a girl made of light to rule the world. i’m not one hundred percent sure what it would look like, to be honest.
🐾 what are you scared of most? how will you overcome it?
i’m afraid of being abandoned by those i love. for right now, i’m not positive that i’ll ever overcome it, and because of that i don’t get to close to people.
☔️ would you consider yourself a good person?
as good as you can get while not being innocent. i try to be as kind of a person as i can, and help others. i’m definitely not a bad person, but i’m not a good one either.
🐧 describe yourself in 3 words
friendly, hypocritical, lustful
🍪 😔 🐼
🍪 what did you want to be as a kid, and what do you want to be now?
“I actually wanted to be a mermaid in space when I was a little kid. Now ... well, I still want to be a mermaid in space, actually. But a veterinarian would be cool too!”
😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? does it help?
“I really like sitting outside in nature. Either stargazing, or just laying in the grass. Sometimes I write in a journal and get all my thoughts out that way. It’s comforting being surrounded by something that’s bigger than yourself. It reminds me that my problems aren’t the end of the world.”
🐼 if you could meet anyone, who would it be and why?
“Princess Diana. She was just a total inspiration to me. Beauty, grace, and kindness -- the perfect role model!”
🐾 🐇 🐝 🍋
🐾 what are you scared of most? how will you overcome it?
“hm.... well, i guess i’m afraid of anyone else in the group dying before me. i’d rather be the first to go, to be honest. why not just save myself the pain or whatever of seeing my ‘friends’ die, like, i’ll sacrifice myself for pretty much everyone just so i don’t have to deal with that shit. no one else here deserves to die.”
🐇 what do you always daydream about?
“a normal life. coffee in my hand at all times of the day. teddy fuckery speaking actual words with meaning towards me.”
🐝 what’s your worst trait? how are you planning to improve it?
“i don’t have any bad traits, i’m the best person ever. thank you very much.”
🍋 do you consider yourself an emotional person?
“i mean, i guess not. annoyance is really the only thing i ever feel, so i don’t think that makes me much of an emotional person. i feel maybe one or three other emotions sometimes, but eh. those don’t really count, i don’t think.”
