#xc camp

Hill repeats after 14 mile days are really fun I promise ❤️

Mountains, running, and teammates=love

Ahh this camp is killing me. I thought I was in decent shape but I guess I'm not. For the morning run, I did 5 miles in 46:13, or 9:14 pace. I was running with my group and just fell off pace, I don't know why I couldn't do it. I just couldn't push myself...I wanted to (mentally) run fast but I couldn't do it (physically). This sucks. I don't know how realistic it would've been for me to do 12 mi a day and have this be a 60 mile week when my highest mileage per week has been 30, but I was willing to try it. I just feel like a failure, the other girl is able to do it right under 8min pace and it just makes me feel like crap. I guess I just have to work harder. What's even more embarrassing is that the coaches decided for me to do the shorter runs, (although he did give me the option to do the longer mileage later in the week if I'm up to it)... but ouch. I feel like garbage. I don't get it, I didn't physically feel tired, I was breathing at a normal rate at the end of the run, but I just physically can't push myself... I don't know why this keeps on happening to me... For the evening run, I did the modified run and ran ran 3.75 miles (instead of the 7miles everyone else did) in 29:49. Now that I look back at it, the pace I've supposedly run sounds really fast, and I felt pretty sluggish all through the run. I really don't think I ran that much, the time is certain, but I probably ran around 3.25-3.5 miles (8:30 to 9:09 pace). It was rough, I shuffled multiple times and my counselor hand to turn back and walk to wait for me so many times, it was pretty pathetic. I don't know why this is so hard for me...I knew it would be difficult but nowhere did I think it would be this tough on me...but I have to keep in mind this is the first time I've ever ran twice a day, the first time I'm running this amount of mileage, of course I would have liked to assimilate a bit smoother into this, but it is what it is. I just have to use this as motivation to not run slowly...I don't want to feel embarrassed again! To get better, I have to push myself. No more excuses, I always have to give it my best.

First day of Xc camp! So far it's going well, but is a little different from what I expected it to be. There's only around 35-40 runners here, and there's only one other girl...yeah. There's only two girls in the whole camp. So that was a little surprising, but the good thing is that I know the girl, she's my teammate in school. The girl told me two years ago there were around 20 girl runners, last year around 12, and this year only two girl runners. And she said in general the amount of campers has decreased. I wonder why the amount of people coming to the camp has gone down so much. Well, today I ran seven miles. The first two miles were rough, but I felt (mostly) fine from there. More than halfway in (I would guess around 4 miles?) there was a pretty big hill, and it just broke me mentally. I literally shuffled for the next mile or so...hills are my weakness. I've got to work on making them my strength! So I fell off pace after the hill, which was pretty de-motivating for me, I've ran so much over this summer and I can't do one hill? Well I've still got a few days to get that hill, before the week ends my goal is to run up that hill :) I ran it in 59:59, or 8:34 pace, so that's technically a PR for me! I hope I'll be able to improve on this time later in the week.

Last week was 130 miles all on the stationary bike. I did a little bit of swimming too but that's only 3 or 4 miles worth.