i hope i'm not the only one who makes fanfic of my own ocs even before i write in canon

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i hope i'm not the only one who makes fanfic of my own ocs even before i write in canon

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wishlist: some kind of waterproof typewriter or computer so i can write in the shower because the perfect scenes run through my brain while i’m in there yet i immediately lose all inspiration as soon as i come out
And I am not talking forever like everyody else - the afterlife, souls forever united, wandering the beyond. No, forever is one lifetime, forever is the end of my life, the end of yours, as one lifetime is forever enough for me, to have known you, to have been with you. As if I have even one lifetime with you, I would consider all my dreams and desires fulfilled. But, if in another life, fate so decides to be tricky and sneaky, having us meet again - I won't hesitate to spend another lifetime with you.
somewhere in a book I haven’t written yet
character sheet | elaine.
       BE CAREFUL, THIS POST IS FULL OF S P O I L E R S.
"I am no Weapon. I am the heir of the Lord of Darkness. And I don’t belong to anyone but myself."  Â
General Informations
Name: Elaine of Nitroae
Pronunciation: Elain of Nitroe
Other Names: El
Gender: Female
Orientation: Heterosexual
Alignment: True Neutral
MBIT Personality Type: INFP-T
Birth Date: 28th November
Laterality: Right-handed
Astrological Sign: Sagittarius
Autograph:Â
Appearance
Height: 158 cm
Species: Half-goddessÂ
Blood Type: A
Skin Color: White pale skin
Birthmarks: Elaine’s Mark covers all her left leg and right arm, and is shaped like tendrils of dark smoke. Whenever she uses her powers, those tendrils move.
Hair Color: Dark brown. White when she uses her powers.
Hair Length: Elaine loves long hair, even though they’re definitely uncomfortable while fighting. At the moment they reach past her mid back.
Hair Type: Straight
Hair Style: She mostly keeps them loose, except when she has to work out or fight. In those moments she keeps them in a braid.
Eyes: Big brown eyes, with long lashes
Face Shape: Rounded/squared faceÂ
Voice: Ashley Johnson |Â https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uOr7DE1EA9I
Psychology & other infos
Temperament: Melancholic (according to OSPP Four Temperaments Test).
Spirit Animal: Owl, which is emblematic of a deep connection with wisdom and intuitive knowledge.
Deathwish: It doesn’t matter how, or when. It has to happen with Sam close to her.
Greatest Fear:Â Seeing Sam in pain, or worse, feeling him building walls between them. She needs to feel his presence, even if only at the outskirts of her mind.Â
Likes: Standing alone in a high point, watching people go on with their lives. Flying at high speed with Scythe over miles and miles of land, with the wind rustling her hair and silencing her thoughts.
Dislikes:Â People suffering.Â
Favorite food: Leshneer, a dish based on rice and vegetables.Â
Least Favorites food: Fish.Â
Ability: Darkness control, which means she can shape darkness into objects she can use while fighting. She can even shape them into animals and give them life, even tho it needs a great amount of energy and usually leaves her completely exhausted for some time (this actually varies on the type of creature: small creatures needs way less energy than big creatures, which means she can create butterflies and play with them without feeling tired for examples. But bigger creatures, such as her winged mare Scythe can knock her out for a couple of days.
Faults: Elaine’s definitely way too naive. She’s prone to think the best of people, and to assume nobody acts to cause pain to others. It’s not like she refuses to believe bad people exist, just… she trusts people way too easily.Â
Virtues: Her pity. And this goes with what just said in the faults section: she forgives people and gives them second chances, because she’s sure people can learn from their mistakes. She believes in the moral improvement that comes from atonement and she’s conscious no one can reach that if anybody is willing to give people second chances. Â
Soundtrack:Â https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6T9Pb3YMovQ
looking back at The Broken Kingdom, which I started for NaNoWriMo 2018 and haven’t done an awful lot more on since, is like.. seven and a half thousand words? really?  hey 2018 me you are like a little baby, watch this (on Wayward, which I started for NaNoWriMo 2019):
(god damn I actually didn’t realise how long Wayward was, jesus)
and then this word count I have for a fucking fanfiction! you couldn’t have even dreamed of writing a decent fanfiction back then honey, get on my level

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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TFW
you realize the entire theme of the chapter in progress is Jedao's issues around consent
I can think of one canonical instance where his consent was important and it wasn't in any of the books. (The one with the goose fat.)
All right, I can work with that...
ICARUS IS FLYING TOO CLOSE TO THE SUN ICARUS'S LIFE HAS ONLY JUST BEGUN
*cheers self on* you can do it. do it liz. go full self indulgent. do it do it DO IT