#wordsformyself

Moon speaks to us all

don't get discouraged during the process

The Angsty Adventurer of 2018

Hey, you've grown wonderfully. Thank you for keeping up. All the tears were worth it, all the pain and all the wounds.

You've finished your goals of collecting more memories, of watching a hundred movies that taught you more than a hundred lessons. You rode the go-cart twice, carousel and flying fiesta like a kid. You learned how to ride a horse all by yourself. Last summer you rode the zip line, one of the best days of your life.

The adventure always awaits you. And of course adventure is more memorable if you spend it with your love ones.

Being a school girl, you did so great. Even if you didn't get the grades you expected you've tried so hard. Thank you for always trying and not giving up. Let's try not to procrastinate this 2019 okay? One day, you'll realize what you really want to do for the rest of your life. For now, let's just wait for it but still think of it okay?

You've tried to be a good daughter, sister, granddaughter, and a friend. Remember the first time you slept over at Rica Mae's house? And the second one too, at her 16th birthday. It was full of realizations and late night talks. You've been a great pain in the ass as a daughter, a sister and as a Lola's girl, but thank God they're patient and loving. I know how hard you tried to be kind. To all the problems that made you strong.

I can feel that 2019 will be crazy af. Full of memories to make, adventures and traveling to do. You've lived your life to fullest and you bloomed like the most beautiful flower in the whole universe.

This 2019, your goal is to still make memories, to do more adventures and traveling. Let's skip the 100 movies and make them a 30-day challenge, just think of how it will go and plan it more. Let's reconnect with books again, I know you missed reading a four hundred paged book and trust me they missed you too. One goal for this year is to write 100 poems instead of watching a hundred movies. Keep your phone away from you because this years is your year, taking care of your eyes is the the number one goal.

Always be kind and choose to be happy.

Less anxiety and more self love.

Sometimes we have disagreements. Fights, arguments, and name-calling are all a part of getting into it with someone. We can’t all be civil all the time and that’s understandable because that anger that has the tendency to rise up on occasion can take even the best of us down to a state of forgoing words for fists.

But when the encounter is done, the bad energy tends to remain, especially if one or both parties were wronged. What I’ve learned however is that internalize that hate doesn’t help you. Suppose you’re the only one still taking it that seriously while the other person is going on with their life? How do you look? You let their words and the memories of their action play in your mind again and again to fester into something so ugly that it could only start another problem even worth the smallest provocation. Nobody needs to willing facilitate ugly.

My need to impress is immature and based in fear. Letting people in on the other hand is terrifying, but it’s not based in fear; it’s based in trust. Trust that people will get me, and if they don’t, I’m still ok.

When I perform, I shouldn’t be aiming for a certain response out of people. I should be aiming for a certain contribution to them. My contribution isn’t my ability as an artist; it’s my whole self, my story, my strengths and flaws, my humanity.

There aren’t enough human beings walking around anymore. Plenty of teachers and leaders and superstars to like and follow and organizations to join. Plenty of people leaving this church or joining that club. But on our most basic level, as human beings, we’re alone. We're not sharing ourselves - only our product.