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Death ray this, testicular torsion that, my favorite offensive magic is to summon i tiny water elemental and have it try to suck off my opponent, thus bypassing most protective sigils, it fails and splashes onto their cloak and thus makes it look like my foe has pissed themselves.
This worked very well of course until i became embroiled in a beef against Regelious Kellyc, The Piss Wizard
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hey wizards. why do you feel the need to solemnly say "I CAST" before casting something. just use the spell directly. I don't understand.
Never practice alchemy with sleep deprivation. I just woke up at my station and there’s something red and green in this vial and it keeps shaking. I don’t know what to do with it.
Hey!
Does anyone have any odd jobs I can do? I don't have any money right now.
I can:
brew potions
grow plants (nothing massive though)
do basic healing magic
Maybe some other stuff as well that I don't remember
every friend i have is 28 loopholes and 16 sessions of negotiations into their pact and then you meet a paladin and they're like. "I have broken my oath 😔. I thought I had done the right thing but... my God didn't..." Girl you have rights.
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Wizards keep on casting ‘mend buttcrack’ but thats the absolute wrong spell for their intended purpose
Thats something you use after you got your ass torn up the night before.
What you really want is ‘rend buttcrack’
That’ll violently rip a vvizard a new one for sure
Check out my new orb, its delicious and i am determined to eat all of it. I was ate an orb half its size just like it so i believe in myself
“Why do you prefer hand casting?” Is a question I get asked often, well, its just so much more romantic
The feeling of magic power flowing out through your body to the edges of your fingertips, knowing that the hands you use to hold things dearly are dangerous tools of destruction and creation, and you hold the power back as to not damage it…
